words in movies
JOEY: No, no, no.� When you get home tomorrow night, you and I are going to be at the Wizzards-Knicks game . . .� courtside!
MONICA: Really?� But tomorrow night is the only night I get off from the restaurant.� If you go to the game, we won't have a night together for another week.
CHANDLER: But hey, it's courtside.� The cheerleaders are going to be right in fr. . . (Pause)� That's not the way to convince you.
MONICA: Chandler look, I don't want to be one of those wives who says, "You can't go to the game.� You have to spend time with me."� So, if you could just realize it on your own . . .
CHANDLER: I know.� You're right.� I want to see you too.� I've just got to figure out a way to tell Joey, you know?� He's really looking forward to this.
MONICA: Tell him that you haven't seen your wife in a long time.� Tell him that having a long-distance relationship is really difficult.� Tell him that what little time we have is precious.
ROSS: Wow!� (pause)� Wow, You look . . . uh . . .�� It's just, ah . . .�� That dress . . . uh . . .�
ROSS: Well, well, they're good.� It's been a while since I've seen you like this.� You, you clean up good.
RACHEL: Oh well, well thank you.� (She laughs.� He stares for a moment.)� Okay, stop.� Stop looking at me like that.� The last time that happened, (points to Ross) that happened.� (points to Emma.)
ROSS: Oh right, right.� (They pause and exchange a glance. Then, Ross looks away.)� So, are you . . . ah . . . you excited about your, your first night away from Emma?
RACHEL: Yeah, yeah.� Phoebe and I are going to have so much fun.� And thank you for watching the baby, by the way.
RACHEL: I didn't know you guys hung out.
ROSS: We don't.� But I thought it would be nice to get to know him.� You know, maybe have a little dinner, drinks, conversation.
RACHEL: Oh that's so cute:� Ross and Mike's first date.� Is that going to be awkward?� I mean, what are you guys going to talk about?
ROSS: I don't know.� But, you know, we, we have a lot in common, you know.� He plays piano; I played keyboards in college.� He's been divorced; I have some experience in that area.
RACHEL: (to Ross) Ok.� So now, I think Emma is probably down for the night, but if you need anything Ross . . .
ROSS: Rach, Rach, we'll be fine, all right?� You go have fun.
RACHEL: Okay.� You too.� And I hope you score.� (to Mike) Bye.
ROSS: Okay.� (They sit.)� So, um, Phoebe tells me you, ah, you play piano.
ROSS: You know, I, I used to, ah, play keyboards in college.
MIKE: Ah?� (pause)� Do you have one here?
ROSS: Um . . . ah . . . you know, I'm divorced.� Um, Phoebe, ah . . . Phoebe said you . . . You've been divorced?
CHANDLER: (Hangs his jacket over the suitcase, locks the door, then turns to Monica.)� Oh well, look at you.
MONICA: Yeah.� What do you think?
MONICA: So, you lied to him?
CHANDLER: Achhh.� It's always better to lie than to have the complicated discussion.� (pause)� Except with you.
JOEY: What are you . ..� (He sees her in her negligee.)� Why are you dressed like that?
MONICA: Oh, because, um . . .� well, Chandler's going to be home in a couple of days.� So, I thought I would, you know, practice the art of seduction.
MONICA: Oh I was just doing Chandler's side of the conversation.� You know, like, "Hi, How do I look?"� (As Chandler) "Really sexy.� Could I BE any more turned on?"
MONICA: Because. . .� one of them is for you.
CHANDLER: You know, it's funny.� I've been, ah, practicing the art of seduction myself.� (He raises his hands in front of himself, sticks out his behind, and wiggles it.)� Hi ya.
MONICA: You might want to keep practicing.
JOEY: I don't know how to tell you this but, uh . . . I think Monica's cheatin' on ya.� I told you shouldn't have married someone so much hotter than you.
JOEY: All right look.� (He walks to the hallway.)� If you can't come home and deal with this, then I'm gonna.
CHANDLER: (softly) Can you . . . hear him . . . now?
JOEY: Okay.� Great.� I'll see you when you get here.� I'm gonna wait out in the hall in case the dude comes out.
JOEY: Absolutely.� You'd do it for me.� Not that you ever have to because I know how to keep my women satisfied.
MIKE: (looking at his watch) Eleven minutes.� (long pause)� And now twelve.� So, do you like the beer?
PHOEBE: Oh God.� Remember the girls' nights we used to have sitting around talking about you and Ross?
PHOEBE: I know.� (sighs)�� So, what's going on with you and Ross?
RACHEL: Well, um . . . I don't know.� I mean, for a long time nothing.� But you know, actually right before you picked me up, Ross and I had a . . . ah . . . little thing.
PHOEBE: I hope you were using protection.
RACHEL: Well, we're not here to meet guys.� You have a boyfriend, I have a b. . . baby and a Ross.
PHOEBE: Yeah, but, ah, ah, nothing has to happen.� We're just having fun.� You know, not everything had to go as far as "eye-contact."
MONICA: Chandler, you have to tell Joey that you're not in Tulsa.
CHANDLER: Don't you think it's better for him to think that you're cheating on me, than for him to think that I'm cheating on him?� (Monica tips her head slightly as if asking "Did you hear yourself?")� I heard it.
MONICA: Aren't you afraid that Joey's going to figure all of this out?� (pause)� I heard it.
RACHEL: Oh my God.� I can't believe you live in that building.� My grandmother lives in that building.� Ida Green?� No sense of personal space?� Kind of smells like chicken?� Looks like a potato.
KEVIN: So, we're on our way to a couple of parties.� Um. . . maybe we can get your numbers and give you guys a call if we find something fun.
PHOEBE: Yeah. . . I'm sorry.� We weren't really looking for anything to happen with you guys.� I, I have a boyfriend.
KEVIN: All right. It's no big deal. BILL: So, she has a boyfriend. What is your situation? RACHEL: Oh, well, it's complicated. I don't actually have a boyfriend.� But um. . . BILL: Then, can I have your number? RACHEL: (pause) I'm sorry, no. BILL: Okay. (They start to walk away.) RACHEL: Oh sure.� (She pulls a business card from her purse and writes on it.) PHOEBE: (Reading the card.) Oh my God, you're giving your real number. BILL: Okay, thanks. I'll give you a call later tonight. RACHEL: Great. BILL: Bye PHOEBE: Bye. (The guys leave.) Wow. So, that's great. You, Bill, Ross, and Emma are going to be so happy together. What were you thinking?
PHOEBE: What about Ross?� What about your moment?� Don't you want to talk to Ross about it?
RACHEL: No.� No, because I know exactly how the conversation's gonna go.� "Hey Ross, you know, I think we had a moment before."
PHOEBE: Yeah, I see what you mean.� By the way, nice Ross imitation.
RACHEL: Well, the point is, maybe I should just stop waiting around for moments with Ross, you know?� I should just . . . move on with my life.
PHOEBE: Well, you kind of just did.� That guy is going to call you tonight.� Ross is going to pick up the phone and that's a pretty clear message.
MIKE: Ah, you mean lager.
PHOEBE: (calling from the bar on her cell phone.) Hey, Mike, it's me.� Listen, is um, is Ross near you?
PHOEBE: Well, you have to go back in.
PHOEBE: I'm so sorry honey, but, okay, Rachel gave this guy her number and, um, she doesn't want Ross to answer the phone.� So, you have to intercept all his calls.
RACHEL: Oh give me , , ,� (Phoebe gives Rachel the phone.)� Hi, Mike?� Hi.� Listen.� I know this is a lot to ask, but you know what?� If you do this I . . . Phoebe will . . . do anything you want.� Seriously, I'm talking dirty stuff.
ROSS: (whining) But you left.
JOEY: Wow!� That didn't take long.� I thought you said Tulsa was, like a three hour flight.
MONICA: What are you saying?
MONICA: There's no man in here.� How dare you accuse me of that.� (She slaps Chandler.)
JOEY: All right.� All right.� Then, maybe you won't mind if me and my friend take a look around, huh?� (He checks the bathroom shaking the bat.� Then he proceeds to their bedroom.)� Bwa-ah-ah!
JOEY: (emerging) Bedroom is clear, although you might need some new pillows.
MONICA: (sniffing Joey) I think that's you.
MONICA: I can't believe you thought I was cheating.� (pointing at Joey) You own me an apology.
JOEY: (spots the suitcase just inside the door where Chandler left it) Whoa, whoa.� Wait a minute.� Wait a minute.� If you just got back from Tulsa, how did your suitcase beat you here?
CHANDLER: (thinks, then turns to Monica) I climb down the fire escape and you can't put that in the closet?
ROSS: Maybe you should look up "fascinating."
MIKE: I'll get it.� (He lunges across Ross's lap on the sofa to reach the phone.� Ross stares at him with wide eyes.)� Hello?� Ross's place.� Mike speaking.� (pause.� Hands phone to Ross)� It's for you.
CHANDLER: I'm sorry.� I, I told you I was in Tulsa because I wanted to spend the night with Monica and I, I didn't know . . .� I didn't think you'd understand.
JOEY: What? You think I'm too dumb to understand that a husband needs to be with his wife?� Huh?� Do you think I'm like, "Duh."� (He strikes himself in the head with the bat.� He stands dazed for a moment.)
MONICA: I don't know what to say.� We shouldn't have lied to you.
CHANDLER: Yeah.� I feel so bad.� Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?
JOEY: (pause) Yeah, you could go to the game with me, ah, even though I know you said you couldn't.� But then you lied to me and tricked me and gave me a bump on the head.
MONICA: (taps chandler on the arm) You can go.
MONICA: You should go to the game.� It's okay.� I want you to.
MONICA: Yeah, I'll be fine.� You know, maybe I'll stay here and practice the art of seduction.
CHANDLER: You're gonna put on sweats and clean, aren't you?
CHANDLER: Hey, listen.� I'm never going to lie to you again, okay?� And I want you to know that nobody thinks you're stupid.
JOEY: Where are you going?
RACHEL: Wow.� So, what did you guys do?
ROSS: Oh, you know . . . we just drank some beer and Mike played with the boundaries of normal social conduct.
RACHEL: See you guys.� (She closes the door.)
ROSS: So, ah . . . So, how was it?�� Uh, did you guys. . . Did you guys have a good time?
ROSS: Hey you guys.� (He sits.)
Ross: Yeah. I'm paying you to stop.
Ross: This is crazy! I mean, yes-yes Rachel is my good friend and I-I have loved her in the past, but now, she is just my wife! Phoebe, will you-will you help me out here?
Mona: I mean I love spending time with you, yknow I justI hope were moving forward. I mean, we should probably talk about that. Dont you think?
MONICA: So you watched the movies huh?
(Everyone looks at him. He realizes he just spilled the beans about Ross's crush on Rachel. You can hear this entire classic scene by clicking here.)
Ross: Phoebe, how could you do this to me?!
PHOEBE: Janice? You called Janice?
Angela: You know what else? He's unbelievable in bed.
Rachel: What are you guys doing here?
Joey: Yeah, well, you don't have your racket.
Rachel: For like a half an hour! Man, you can lie about Sweden!
Monica: Oh, so you like her too Chandler?
RACHEL: Uh, OK, I mean uh, what, how are you gonna handle it. I mean, are, are ya gonna, are ya gonna talk about it before hand, are you just gonna pounce?
Phoebe: Where are you going, Mr. Suity-Man?
Mr. Geller: Well you kids talk about this place so much, we thought wed see what all the fuss is about.
Monica: Would you stop staring at her?
Chandler: Umm, hows it going with you guys?
ROSS: Number six: the way you smell.
Rachel: Just tell Joey that you watched the tape and you liked it, but your bosses didn't. Then that way, you're the good guy and they're the bad guys.
Rachel: (still can't find him) How are you doing this?
ROB: Maybe if you just played some regular kiddie songs.
Chandler: It was working until you showed up, you big tree! I mean, this isnt fair. You had your chance with her! You had your chance and you blew it! And this is my chance and I am not going to blow it because we are meant for each other! And this is all just been one stupid mistake! (Sits down heavily.) I was gonna propose tonight.
MONICA: You got it.
Rachel: She spit up. Judy! She spi�Judy! Look alive, Judy! (they sit down) Thank you.
Cop: Yeah. Ever since you flashed my badge at me, I kinda can't stop thinking about you. You're the prettiest, fake undercover whore I've ever seen.
Rachel: So, what, youre just, youre just okay with being flaky?
Tim: I gotta tell you, you look great now.
Rachel: No Phoebe, I am not letting you put makeup on my baby!
Monica: No way! You had your party, now I have mine! Is everything alright?
Mrs. Verhoeven's Daughter: Thats so sweet. (Takes the flowers.) Would you like to come in and say good-bye? Im sure it would mean a lot to her.
Dr. Green: (interrupting him) I know!! Its a museum! What, youre the only one around here who can make a joke! At least mine was funny. Ah, waiter, we will have two lobsters and a menu. (nods at Ross, and mouths I dont know to the waiter.)
Ross: Perhaps. Now Im curious, at what point during those girlish screams would you have begun to kick my ass?
Chandler: But you said you forgave me. It was just a couple of cigarettes�no big deal.
RACHEL: Well, then, you know, couldn't she have just copied my haircut?
Paul: Ross. You and I are going to have to have a little talk.
RACHEL: Maybe you should put it off.
Phoebe: Okay, we have like ten minutes. Do you want me to get into that now?!
Lydia: Joey Tribbiani. Yes, ok. Hold on. (to Joey) She wants to talk to you. Take the phone.
Ross: I'm the holiday armadillo! I'm a friend of Santa's and he sent me here to wish you (Points to Ben) a Merry Christmas!
Ross: Do you think if the Ralph Lauren people offered her her old job back, she would take it?
Ross: Look, I dont think so Pheebs. (Pause) All right, Ill do it. But just because youre a friend. (Grabs the tickets and heads to divert Whitney.)
Nurse: Well, you know your insurance will cover that.
Chandler: Say Ross, when you picture Phoebe living on the street, is she surrounded by the entire cast of Annie?
Phoebe: These are not mine... Look how flimsy they are, come on! Good God! You try to hang a guy from a waterpipe with these, they'll snap like a piece of licorice.
Phoebe: Why don't you turn them inside ou...
Joey: Listen, you know how uh, when youre wearing pants and you lean forward I check out your underwear?
Rachel: (starts crying and speaking at the same time, making it almost impossible to understand what she's saying) I wouldn't know what I'm gonna do without you...
ROSS: But, you are.
Joey: Oh. What do you do?
CHANDLER: Ooh, you almost had it.
ROB: How did you know there was a but?
CHANDLER: Hey Jo. When'd you start usin' mousse in your hair?
PHOEBE: Thank you for coming everybody. There're cookies in the back.
Monica: (shouts to Chandler) Chandler? Do you promise to be good?
Rachel: Good, Pheebs. What'd you buy?
Julie: Rachel, do you have any muffins left?
Rachel: Okay, very cute braces. Anyway yknow what, the point is Tag, start looking because you are going to find those contracts on your desk. (She goes into her office.)
Chandler: And (he imitates the buzzer) to you too, Helen.
Monica: You know what? I take back what I said before. You keep playing at the restaurant, because with your music driving people inside, my bar sales are going up like crazy.
Joey: (onscreen) "I thought I knew who the enemy was, but it was you all along."
JOEY: If you hated the bracelet so much, Chandler, you should have just said so.
Phoebe: All right, that makes sense. (Starts towards the door.) Ugh. ButScrew you Im going first! (She grabs her purse and runs out.)
Chandler: What are you crazy? That's a baby!
Melissa: Im sorry Ray-ray. I mean if I thought it happened I would say it. Maybe I passed out and you did stuff to me while I was sleeping.
Joanna: Knowing youre here, waiting for me I think its kinda exciting.
Chandler: Oh come on guys, its not like I moved to Europe! I just moved across the hall! And we would have you over all the time if it werent for (struggles to get this out) Monicas allergies. (The duck quacks.) Youre right, I could never lie to you. She hates you. (The phone rings.) Should I get that? (Laughs, then answers the phone.) Hello? (Listens) Uh no, Joeys not here right now. Can I take a message? (Listens) Yeah, okay so the audition has been moved from 5:00 to 2:30? (Listens) Okay great. (Listens.) Bye. (Hangs up the phone and goes to write the message on the Magna-Doodle on the door but Monica walks in and forces him to jump out of the way.)
Pete: One meal! Thats all Im asking for. Please? We go out, we eat, and if you dont have a good time, I give you ten grand, we call it even.
Ross: Listen. Um, listen. Something you should... know... um, Rachel and I... we're kind of a thing.
ROSS: Yes, yes I am. And you are a....
Rachel: Well, last time I almost got fired. You must end it, you must end it now!
Monica: You guys, Joey just saw Janice kissing her ex-husband.
Chandler: I say, Drew! Are you seeing anybody right now? (Drew looks at him) Og-ee-op, Im not asking for me, Im I mean No, Im-Im not gay, Im not asking you out. Im not-Im not-Im not gay!
Joey: Enough said, I'm there for you man. Where is she, upstairs?
Monica: You must feel horrible. Hey! The guys have free porn!
Monica: Chandler, do you think we talk about our relationship enough?
Rachel: No. What do you do if I say we are coming about?
JOEY: How come you have two?
PHOEBE: Not especially. But you know what, I think they had pot in them.
Joey: You dont have to seem so happy about it.
ROSS: You know what, you guys, we don't have to watch this.
Monica: You had a salad.
Monica: He says he wants to leave the country. (Pause) He thinks you hate him.
MONICA: Oh, you look so great.
Rachel: Ok. (Phoebe starts to walk in the opposite direction though. Rachel sees and follows her) Wha...? where? Where are you going?
Ross: Things you find in the ocean, (to Joey) You're gonna be on "Pyramid"!!
Rachel: Hmm. (she opens the freezer) Umm, why do you have a copy of The Shining in your freezer?
Rachel: Joey, is what she just said ummOh my God. (Looks around the room.) You were actually gonna (Chandler picks this moment to return to the living room.) (Rachel stares in shock.)
Rachel: Op, look! Claire forgot her glasses! And she's gonna be really needing these to keep an eye on that boyfriend, who, I hear, needs to keep his stapler in his desk drawer, if you know what I'm talking about.
Phoebe: Thats good, you should be impulsive and you should be romantic. Just you did it with the wrong person. (He looks at her.) What?
Monica: No. I dont think that you and I were destined to end up together. I think that we fell in love and work hard at our relationship. Some days we work really hard.
Rachel: Oh, ok, thank you. (Molly leaves) (to Monica) Do you see what all the guys see in her?
Monica: Come on, get into bed! I want to prove to you that Im not sick! I wanna make you feel, as good as I feel. (Sneezes.)
Rachel: Okay, uh, you let me go grocery shopping, and I buy laundry detergent, but it's not the one with the easy-pour spout.
Monica: Y'know what really bothers me? Isit's how-how different you act around them! I mean y'know the throwing the tennis games, the fake laugh, the "I'll see you around, Bing!" "Not if I see you first, Doug!" (Mocks the fake laugh.) I gotta tell you, I don't like Work Chandler. Okay? The guy's a suck-up.
Rachel: Come on, this isnt funny. She thinks its my fault that you havent called her. You have to call her!
Phoebe: (To Joey) Maybe its something you ate?
Rachel: Okay honey, you can finish this later were gonna be late. We gotta go.
Phoebe: (scared) Fire alarm? (She opens the door to reveal a fireman holding the blanket with the smoke detector.) Oh! Hi, officerfireman, can-can I help you?
Monica: Boy, I know they say you can't change your parents,... boy, if you could- (To Ross) -I'd want yours.
RACHEL: Hey you.