words in movies
PHOEBE: Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. Ugly Naked Guy is decorating his tree. Oh my God, you should see the size of his Christmas Balls.
JOEY: Hey, how much did you guys tip the super this year?
CHANDLER: Yeah, we were gonna give fifty, but if you guys gave more, we don't wanna look bad.
JOEY: You gave him cookies?
CHANDLER: Phoebs, let me ask you something, were, were these, uh, funny brownies?
PHOEBE: Not especially. But you know what, I think they had pot in them.
ROSS: So you guys, who else did you tip with cookies?
JOEY: I can't believe it's Christmas already. Ya know, I mean, one day your eatin' turkey, the next thing ya know, your lords are a-leapin' and you geese are a-layin'.
ROSS: Hey Rach. I, uh, got you a little present. [Rachel is not impressed]. . I'll open it. It's a Slinky! Remember, huh. [sings] Walks down stairs, alone or in pairs, everyone knows it's. . . just a big spring. Alright, you still mad at me becuase of the whole. . .
ROSS: How 'bout from now on we just call it the 'unfortunate incident'? [Rachel walks off] Hey Gunther, you got stairs in your place?
JOEY: C'mon show us what you bought. . . You know you want to.
PHOEBE: Happy Christmas Eve Eve. [sees Ross's picture frame] Oh my God, where did you get this?
PHOEBE: No it isn't, this is my dad, alright, I'll show you.
RACHEL: How have you never been on Oprah?
PHOEBE: Just, you know, to see... um.
GRANDMOTHER: Oh, sure, yeah. [gets a box with the pictures] This is the one of you father in a meadow, and, uh, helping a little boy fly a kite, and here he is at a graduation. . . another graduation. . . another graduation.
PHOEBE: Ya know, in all the years that we have been grandmother and granddaughter, you have never lied to me.
GRANDMOTHER: It was your mother's idea. Ya know, she didn't want you to know your real father because it hurt her so much when he left, and, I didn't want to go along with it, but, well then she died and, and it was harder to argue with her. Not impossible, but harder.
MONICA: How do you know exactly what she's going through?
ROSS: Yeah, what're you guys doin' here, aren't you supposed to be Christmas shopping?
MONICA: You guys haven't gotten your presents yet? Tomorrow's Christmas Eve, what're ya gonna do?
CHANDLER: Don't you have to be Claymation to say stuff like that?
JOEY: Monica, pigeons learn faster that you.
ROSS: Hey, Rach, you know what? I think, I think I know what'll make you feel better. How 'bout you make a list about me. RACHEL: Wha... forget it Ross, no, I am not gonna stand here and make a list of. . . ROSS: C'mon Rachel. RACHEL: OK, you're whiney, you are, you're obsessive, you are insecure, you're, you're gutless, you know, you don't ever, you don't just sort of seize the day, you know. You like me for what, a year, you didn't do anything about it. And, uh, oh, you wear too much of that gel in your hair. ROSS: See there, you uhh, alright, ya, you did what I said. RACHEL: Yeah, and you know what? You're right, I do feel better, thank you Ross. [she walks off and Ross puts his hand to his hair] [Scene: Back at Phoebe's. She is on the phone] PHOEBE: Yeah, um, in Albany, can I have the number of Frank Buffay. . . OK, um, in Ithica. . . alright, um, Saratoga. . . Oneonta. Alright, you know what, you shouldn't call youself information. [hangs up] [Phoebe's grandmother enters] GRANDMOTHER: Hey. PHOEBE: Hello grandma, if that is in fact your real name. GRANDMOTHER: C'mon now Phoe, don't still be mad at me. How's it going? PHOEBE: Well, not so good. Upstate's pretty big, he's pretty small, you do the math. GRANDMOTHER: Well, I think you're better off without him. Oh honey, I know he's your daddy but, but to me he's still the irresponsible creep who knocked up your mom and stole her Gremlin. PHOEBE: No I just, just wanted to know who he was, ya know. GRANDMOTHER: I know. OK, I wasn't completely honest with you when I told you that, uh, I didn't know exactly where he lived. PHOEBE: Whattaya mean? GRANDMOTHER: He lives at 74 Laurel Drive in Middletown. If you hit the Dairy Queen, you've gone too far. You can take my cab. PHOEBE: Wow. Thank you. GRANDMOTHER: Now, remember, nobody else drives that cab. PHOEBE: Uh-huh, got it. Ooh, I'm gonna see my dad. Wish me luck, Grandpa! [blows a kiss to a picture of Einstein]
PHOEBE: Can you believe this. In, like, two hours I'm gonna have a dad. Eeeshk.
PHOEBE: Alright, here, you have to hold this. [hands Chandler a piece of paper]
MONICA: Rach, get the heat. [Rachel holds up her hand with wet fingernail polish] Ross, could you turn the heat down please?
RACHEL: Did you just break the radiator?
RACHEL: [on phone] Hi, Mr. Treeger. Hi, it's Rachel Green from upstairs. Yes, somebody, uh, broke our knob on the radiator and it's really hot in here. Yes, it's, it's hot enough to bake cookies. Well, do you think we could have a new one by 6? Wha t, no, no, Tuesday, we can't wait until Tuesday, we're having a party tonight.
RACHEL: [answers door] Hi, welcome to our tropical Christmas party. You can put your coats and sweaters and pants and shirts in the bedroom.
MR. TREEGER: Uhh, you said there was a party.
ROSS: Alright, alright, here's the chance. Monica give him cash, Rachel give him your earrings. Something, now, anything. MONICA: No, I will not cave. RACHEL: Yeah, I'm with Mon. ROSS: Alright, alright, you know how you say I never seize the day? Well, alright, even though he's your super, I'm seizing. [approaches Mr. Treeger] Mr. Treeger, here is 50 bucks, merry Christmas. [Gives him the cash.]
MR. TREEGER: Oh wow, I didn't get you anything. Here's five back.
ROSS: No no, no, that, that's your Christmas tip, alright. Oh, hey, do you think there's a chance you could fix that radiator now?
ROSS: You mean hardball?
MONICA: So, wait, you really did like my cookies?
MR. TREEGER: Oh, yeah, they were so personal, really showed you cared.
PHOEBE: Yeah, maybe, yeah. You know, and, and I'll knock on the door and, and he'll hug me and I'll have a dad. Ya know and I'll, I'll go to his pharmacy and everyone will be really nice to me 'cause, you know, I'm Franks daughter.
PHOEBE: Well, 'cause, I mean, what if, what if he's not this great dad guy? I mean, what if, what if he's just still the dirtbag who ran out on my mom and us? You know what? I've already lost a fake dad this week and I don't think I'm ready to lose a real one.
JOEY: Phoebs, that's OK. You took a big step today.
JOEY: Yeah, and when you do, he'll be lucky to have you.
PHOEBE: You guys. I'm sorry about your shopping.
JOEY: Uh, listen Phoebs, I know you're not goin' in there but do you think it'd be alright if I went in and used his bathroom? Oh, that's fine, never mind. Cool, snow, kinda like a blank canvas.
JOEY: Really, hey, you mind if I turn the heat down?
ROSS: Are you OK?
JOEY: Rach, these are for you.
JOEY: No, but with this new car smell, you'll think you do.
PHOEBE: Ahh, toilet seat covers! Is that what you were doing while I was getting gas?
PHOEBE: You guuuyys.
ROSS: You got me a cola drink?
ROSS: Well this, this is too much, I feel like I should get you another sweater.
Ross: Uh-hmm, yeah-yeah do you like it? Do-do you looove it? I just want you to know that Im changing your grade back.
Ross: Hey Pheebs, maybe this whole heart attack thing is a sign, that-that you should start think about getting a different job.
Ross: Im getting that baby out of you!
Alice: None. But if there was something you wanted to tell us, were just gonna be right over there (points to the counter) having coffee.
Rachel: Op! Youre peeping!
Monica: (without looking up from what she's doing) Besides tampons and salt? (Then looks) Ooh! My God! Maple candy! That's so sweet of you. (Opens the box) That's weird...it's empty!
Ross: So, you gals wanna hand over your money now? That way, we don't have to go through the formality of actually playing.
Joey: Oooh, what you got there?
Joey: You know what, you guys? It's their first time, why don't we just forget about the money, alright?
Chandler: You must stop! (Chandler hits what he is working on with a hammer and it collapses.)
Rachel: Yeah, honey, maybe you can talk to somebody whos had a baby. Like your mom?
MONICA: Not that, this, US. Oh my God, Ross, you-re, you're, it's jus-, you-, ever sin- you been here.
Joey: Look Rach, wasnt this supposed to a temporary thing? I thought you wanted to do fashion stuff?
Mrs. Geller: Oh, thank you Chandler! I just bought it.
Phoebe: No, you can�t go. No-no-no, I can�t hold this table on my own. If they ask me to move, I cave.
Ross: Okay, I think I might know why my parents dont like you.
Chandler: You do? Why?
Rachel: Now that youre on youre own, youre free to look as stupid as you like.
Phoebe: Yknow the only reason hes marrying you is because he thinks all the things you were saying about yourself were true.
Chandler: (to Ross) Hey, so can you make it on Friday?
Phoebe: Oh, I know a way that you can decide! All right, I'm going to ask you a series of questions and you answer as quickly as you can.
Joey: All right, I'll see you in the morning.
Joey: Thats what that was?! Cause that other thing? I thought you were on to something, but it did nothing for me.
Phoebe: Hey. So, did you talk to Rachel?
Phoebe: Maybe because you never listen to anything that I say. I talk about her all the time! DENISE!!!!!
Chandler: What are you doing?
Rachel: Okay... aahhh... Please laugh for mommy... Please? Please laugh for mommy... (Rachel makes a funny face, sticking her tongue out, making a farting noise and using her hands as antlers, wiggling her fingers... No response from Emma...) Not funny huh? Oh so, is it... only offensive novelty rap? Or maybe just, you know, rap in general? 'Cause mommy can rap... (Rachel tries to rap and makes weird movements with her arms in the process.) My name is mommy and I'm here to say / that all the babies are... Oh, I can't rap... Allright sweetheart... This is only because I love you so much, and I know that you're not gonna tell anybody... (Rachel's face is telling "Oh what am I doing? The things I have to go through... and she starts to rap) I like... big butts and I cannot lie... / You other brothers can't deny... / when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face... (Emma starts to laugh) Yes! Yes! Yes! YES! Oohhhhh! Oh! (Rachel now really gets into it, and her insecure movements start getting better) I like big butts and I cannot lie... / You other brothers can't deny... Oh Emma you're laughing! Oh you are, you really do like big butts, don't you. Oh you beautiful little weirdo... (Rachel picks up Emma and Ross now enters)
David: Umm, anyway Do you want to have dinner tonight?
CHANDLER: Yes. Hey, can I ask you, is Eddie a little...
Monica: How are you still single?!
Chandler: Yknow you, really didnt have to take me to the airport.
Gary: No, it's too soon for you guys.
Rachel: Honey, why dont you sit down? Dina has something that she wants to tell you.
Ross: Pity food? Y'know what thats okay, all right, I dont need any of you to stay, okay nobody stays.
Ross: Are you kidding?
Phoebe: Tiger! (Joey moves his hand in an attempt to do the chord, in fact he does it with each name.) Dragon! Iceberg!! (He fails.) Joseph, did you even study at all last night?
Monica: You are so handsome! I wanna make love to you right here, right now! (Growls and pulls him into a kiss.)
Ross: Joey proposed to you?
Dana: Apparently Howies editing now. Yeah, he-he-he calls me up and asks me if he can edit my new movie. Can you believe that?! Yknow I-I-I havent spoken to him in like ten years and he asks me for a favor!
Ross: Oh-oh-ooh, hey guys, I was wondering if you guys would uh, maybe chip in on some new air filters for the air purifier? I mean after all, we all are using it.
Joey: Oh, okay. Phoebe, do you take this man to be your husband?
MNCA: We are talking about Rachel here. You and Rachel.
Leslie: What? Why not? You could make a ton of money.
FBOB: Hey, do you need me to pick you up?
Ross: (stopping him) Okay! Okay! Okay. Im sorry. Please, please, you were in Western Europe and?
Joey: Its just I cant because my manager said I (Gets an idea) (Starts singing) "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Annie
Chandler: Look I'm very glad that you saved Ross from the car backfire, but y'know, it could've been a bullet and you y'know, you didn't try to save me!
Mrs. Geller: It was you?
Chandler: (jumping up) Oh, Ill go out and get you some.
Phoebe: (on phone from Central Perk) Hey Joey, I just wanted to let you know that I found a selfless good deed. I just went down to the park and I let a bee sting me.
CHANDLER: It's about cutting my people a little slack, ya know, for morale. Look, if you wanna see some rough numbers, I can get them to you by Wednesday.
Rachel: Ooh... oooh... (pause) (Rachel is all bah-jiggity about Joey) oh, ah... (pause) (to Monica) Can I ask you a question?
Chandler: Thank you!
Phoebe: Cliff, do you really believe that a character from a TV show was here in your room?
Russell: I see. Have you considered therapy?
Lorraine: She's checking the coats. Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off my hands. Will you get me a white Zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice.
Monica: Im really gonna miss you.
Rachel: Oh, I know, I know, the odds are against us, but somebody has to win, and it could be us! And then how you gonna feel? You know, we're gonna be all like "oh everybody, let's take our helicopters up to the cape" and you're gonna be all like "oh, I can't guys, I'll meet you guys up there, I gotta gas up the Hyundai"
Chandler: That's good one too, Pheebs. Now all you have to do is find a planeload of people who's resolution is to plummet to their deaths.
MONICA: Ok. Oh boy. You are doin' so good. You wanna squeeze my hand? All right, Ross, don't squeeze it so hard. Honey, really, don't squeeze it so hard! Oh, Ross! Let go of my hand!
Monica: I thought you said you were going to do nothing.
Joey: Hey you guys.
Joey: Give me a number, I dont want to owe you anything!
Megan: And now youll see me buying it.
MONICA: You need one too?
Phoebe: Yep, and that's why we don't invite you to play.
Chandler: Why did you take the shower curtain down?
Monica: (Scoots towards the side of the bed.) Could you not look?
MR. TREEGER: I know. I was sweepin' yesterday. It coulda been me.ROSS: Sure, sweepin'. You never know.
Ross: Are you serious?
Monica: Look, I know that you're in a place right now where you really need to hate Julie's guts, but she didn't do anything wrong. I mean, she was just a girl who met a guy, and now they go out. I really think that if you gave her a chance, you'd like her. Would you just give that a chance, for me?
Chandler: What, what are you laughing at?
RACH: Hey, there was one Italian guy, OK, and do you even have a point?
Ross: Im asking you to do me a favor.
Ross: Did she (points at Amy) do this to her? I told you we shouldn't have left Emma with her!
Mark: Wow! Somebody wants people to know you have a boyfriend.
Ross: What. Oh no, you just rolled over the juice box.
Ross: no, no, no there's nothing wrong with you I mean you don't strike me as the type of person that wants to get married anyway.
Monica: Oh. Why didnt you take her?
Frank: Are you serious?
Chandler: Oh right, your allergies. (Monica leaves and to the chick and duck) All her, she hates you. (Chandler leaves without finishing the message for Joey.)
Joey: Its not what you said. Its the way you said it .Oh My God, Im a women!!!
Chandler: Lowell? Financial Services' Lowell, that's who you saw me with?
Monica: Wow! Youre a lot sturdier that Chandler. He crumpled like a piece of paper. So how was youre trip?
Joey: What do you mean?
Monica: If the school finds out youre fired.
PRODUCER:They're your backup singers... beind you.
Chandler: Yeah! All right! You go first.
Chandler: I just didn't want to tell you in front of them.
Chandler: Joey told you about the leg, huh?
Rachel: Joey, come on! It doesn't matter, you know, it's not like anything's gonna happen.
Joey: I know, but, I was the best, you know? I liked being the best. (He downs the glass of juice in one swig.) I don't know. Maybe I should just get outta the game. They need guys up in housewares to serve cheese.
Phoebe: What? You mean behind my back?
Janice: Hes a keeper. How are you feeling?
Chandler: Who did you originally want to hook up with?
Rachel: Oh, god, this is great! The plane is gone, so it looks like I'm stuck here with you guys.
PHOEBE: Ohh, ok, I see what you did there. Aren't you afraid though, that the writers are gonna be kinda mad when they read this?
Rachel: I guess you don't.
Phoebe: Yeah, in the back. You want a quarter?
Chandler: Well, you can understand, given how we started.