words in movies
PHOE: No, you are not, you are very attractive. You know what, I go through the exact same thing. Every time I put on a little weight, I start questioning everyting.
MNCA: Chandler, I'm unemployed and in dire need of a project. Ya wanna work out? I can remake you.
CHAN: Oh, you know, I would, but that might get in the way of my lying around time.
MNCA: Nothing, just never seen you in little stretchy pants before.
MNCA: Five more and I'll flash you.
RACH: Yeah, but how much can you tell from a look?
PHOE: No, I felt it on my hip. You could tell.
RACH: What? [looks, feigns indifference] C'mon you guys, I don't care, I have a date tonight.
JOEY: Woah, woah, woah, you have a date?
CHAN: So you really OK about all this?
MNCA: Only if you say his full name.
RACH: Both of you?
RACH: Ohh, well, isn't that just lovely. That's something the two of you will be able to enjoy for a really, really, really, really, really long time.
RACH: Well. [looks at watch] Woah, look at that! I gotta go, I gotta date. With a man. Um, OK, you guys have a really, uh, have a really good night and you two have a, uh, have a, uh, really good cat. [she leaves carrying her tray then comes back in] OK, we're not supposed to take these when we leave.
MICH: I don't know if Monica told you but this is the first date I've gone on since my divorce so, if I seem a little nervous, I am.
RACH: Cats, how long do they live figuring you don't... y'know, throw 'em under a bus or something?
MICH: Monica told you I was cuter that this, didn't she?
RACH: Oh, no, Michael, it's not you. I'm sorry, it's just, it's this thing. It's probably not as bad as it sounds but this friend of mine is, is getting a cat with his girlfriend.
RACH: Ah, hah-hah-hah-ho, yeah, he wishes. Oh, I'm sorry, look at me. OK, Michael, let's talk about you.
RACH: OK, OK. So, you ever get a pet with a girlfriend?
JOEY: Phoebe, that's crazy. When I first met you, you know what I said to Chandler? I said, "Excellent butt, great rack."
JOEY: Phoebs look, if you want to know what the deal is, you're just gonna have to ask him.
PHOE: You're right, you're right. Ah, you are so yumm. [they hug]
RACH: Yes! Thank you.
WAITER: So, would you like any dessert?
RACH: Oh, you're not having fun, are you?
MICH: Oy. Look, I've been through a divorce, trust me you're gonna be fine. You just can't see it now because you haven't had any closure.
MICH: Well, you know, there's no one way really, it's just, you know, whatever it takes so that you can finally say to him, "I'm over you."
GUY: Alright, fine. [on the phone] I'll call you back. [hands the phone to her]
RACH: Thank you. OK. [dials] [to Michael] Machine. Just waiting for the beep.
RACHEL: [on phone] Ross, hi, it's Rachel. I'm just calling to say that um, everything's fine and I'm really happy for you and your cat who, by the way, I think you should name Michael. And, you know, ya see there I'm thinking of names so obviously, I am over you. I am over you and that, my friend, is what they call closure. [hangs up and tosses phone in the ice bucket]
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler is answering the door in his robe.] CHAN: No, no, no, no, no, no [opens door to Monica] No. Monica, it's Sunday morning. I'm not running on a Sunday. MNCA: Why not? CHAN: Because it's Sunday. It's God's day. MNCA: OK, if you say stop, then we stop. CHAN: OK, stop. MNCA: No, c'mon, we can't stop, c'mon, we've got three more pounds to go. I am the energy train and you are on board. Woo-woo, woo-woo, woo-woo [Chandler walks out of the apartment, leaving Monica] Woo. [Scene: Rachel and Monica's apartment. Rachel is taking asprin. Ross enters.] ROSS: Hey Rach. RACH: Ahhhh. ROSS: Oh. And how was the date? RACH: Umm, I think there was a restaurant... I know there was wine. . . [Rachel looks at Ross as though she remembers something, but can't place what it is.]
ROSS: Wow, well uh, uh, actually, Julie's downstairs getting a cab, I just need the cat toy, did Monica say. . . What? Why, why are you looking at me like that? RACH: I don't know, I, I feel like I had a dream about you last night but I, I don't remember. ROSS: OK. Oh, oh, oh. [runs over and picks up the cat toy] RACH: Did we speak on the phone last night? Did you call me? ROSS: No, I stayed at Julie's last night. RACH: Huh. ROSS: Oh, actually I haven't even been home yet. Do you mind if I check my messages? RACH: Oh yeah, go ahead. [Rachel walks in her room. Ross picks up the phone and dials his machine to check his messages.] ROSS: Rach, I got a message from you. [pauses] Who's Michael? [Rachel comes out of her room, suddenly she remembers leaving the message.]
ROSS: When, when were you... under me? Rach. Rachel do you, I mean, were you, uh. . . What?
RACH: Ohh, OK, OK, OK, well, basically, lately, I've uh, I've uh, sort of had feelings for you.
RACH: Yeah, what, so? You had feelings for me first.
ROSS: Woah. Huh. You know about my, I mean, you know I had... you know?
RACH: When you were in China.
ROSS: Julie. Julie. That. Oh God. Julie, right. OK, I need to lie down. No, ya know, I'm gonna stand. I'm gonna stand, I'm gonna walk, I'm walkin' and I am standing. OK so you uh, and now wha... and now, now, now you're over me?
RACH: Are you over me?
JOEY: I can't find the remote. [Phoebe turns off the TV] Thank you.
JOEY: Let me get this straight. He got you to beg to sleep with him, he got you to say he never has to call you again, and he got you thinking this was a great idea.
ROSS: You had no right to tell me you ever had feelings for me.
ROSS: I was doing great with Julie before I found out about you.
RACH: Hey, I was doin' great before I found out about you. You think it's easy for me to see you with Julie?
ROSS: Then you should have said something before I met her.
RACH: I didn't know then. And how come you never said anything to me.
RACH: Right, you, you only had a year. We only hung out every night.
ROSS: Not, not, not every night. You know, and... and it's not like I didn't try, Rachel, but things got in the way, y'know? Like, like Italian guys or ex-fiances or, or, or Italian guys.
RACH: Hey, there was one Italian guy, OK, and do you even have a point?
RACH: Yeah, what're you saying, you just sort of put away feelings or whatever the hell it was you felt for me?
RACH: Alright, fine, you go ahead and you do that, alright Ross.
RACH: And ya know what, now I've got closure. [Rachel slams the door and locks it. She sits down, visibly upset. She puts her head in her hands and begins to cry. Ross comes back and is standing outside the window. When Rachel regroups and gets back up to finish closing, she sees him. She smiles. She goes to open the door and can't get the lock undone.] ROSS: Try the bottom one. [She opens the door and they kiss.] [Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Chandler answers the door to find Monica.] CLOSING CREDITS CHAN: Monica, it's 6:30 in the morning. We're not working out, it's over. MNCA: No way, with one pound to go, c'mon. We're workin', we're movin', we're in the zone we're groovin'. CHAN: OK, I don't, I don't mind the last pound. OK, in fact I kind of like the last pound. OK, so don't make me do anything that I'll regret. MNCA: Ooh, what'cha gonna do, fat boy, huh? What? CHAN: Nothing, except tell you, uh, I think it's wonderful how much energy you have. MNCA: Well, thanks. CHAN: I mean, especially considering how tough it's been for you to find work. MNCA: Well, you know. CHAN: You know, I mean, you can't tell your parents you were fired because they'd be disappointed. MNCA: [sad] Uh-huh. CHAN: And it's not as if you have a boyfriend's shoulder to cry on. MNCA: Well no, but um. CHAN: I mean, if it were me, I think I'd have difficulty just getting out of bed at all. MNCA: Y'know, I try to stay positive. . . CHAN: So, you feel like goin' for a run? MNCA: Alright. CHAN: Because, you know, you don't have to. If you want, you could just take a nap right here. MNCA: OK. Just for a little while. CHAN: OK. [Puts an afghan over her and dances into his room]
Joey: Oh my God! Congratulations Ross, because Chandler, youve been Bamboozled!
Ross: I'm the Holiday Armadillo, your part-Jewish friend. You sent me here to give Ben some presents. Remember?
Phoebe: (after he's gone) I am so sorry you got caught in the middle of that. I didn't mean to be so out there. I am furious with him!
Bitter woman: Why don't you like me! Chapter one: my first period.
Chandler: (nervous smile) You can't make this stuff up!
Phoebe: Thank you. (To the other woman) No? (She nods.) All right. (She goes to another pairing.) Oh, its so nice to see you.
Chandler: Well, its because I trust you, youre one of my best friends, and you walked in on me when I was looking at ring brochures.
Zack: No it's just tiring having to figure out the age at which all my grandparents died. I'll see you tomorrow.
Joey: (checking her out) Hi! You uh, movin in or movin out?
Chandler: Its not something to be proud of, okay? You have to go to a sleep clinic!
Allesandro: Why? So you could hang up on me?
Chandler: You couldn't have at least changed your shirt.
Phoebe: Oh my God! I dont believe it! Oh, you poor bunny.
Lorraine: Hi, Joey. Well well, look what you brought. Very nice.
Phoebe: (singing) And I'm still waiting for my paper mache man. Thank you my babies.
Joey: C'mon, you guys, it wasn't that bad. It was better than that thing I did with the trolls, at least you got to see my head.
Phoebe: Thanks! Honey, would you want me to take your name?
CHANDLER: OK, but uh, I hope you realize this means we're gonna miss hearing about the specials.
Monica: Okay, all right, I think youre great, I think youre sweet, and youre smart, and I love you. But you will always be the guy who peed on me.
Gary: (To Phoebe) So you wanna get some dinner?
Monica: Oh yeah, what are you reading?
Monica: So that marriage stuff that you were saying yesterday, you dont really believe that do you?
Rachel: Okay. (pause).(acting) Hello Drake, I'm surprised to see you here.
Mrs. Bing: He's not a hero. ...You know who our hero is.
Rachel: Well, come on, Steve; let's not rule out nervous laughter. Hey, now wait a minute. Phoebe told me that - that you owned your own restaurant. That's impressive.
Chandler: Well, I-I-I'm done with this. You want anything Ross? Sports? International? Apartment listings?
Monica: Oh really? Okay? Well what would you say if I told you that, yknow, Ross or Chandler could beat you up?
Phoebe: Oh well, all right um, no offense, but you were kind of rude.
Rachel: Aw what are you?! A detective?
Chandler: All right, yknow what? Forget it, all of you forget it! Youve ruined it! Go home! Youve ruined it! Youve ruined it!
Ross: Phoebe, you don't have any of the first five numbers.
Janice: (starting to cry) Do you have any tissues?
Monica: Or if you want to kiss him, umm, you could use mistletoe.
Robin: (starting to cry) Ooh, (to Rachel) Can I have a napkin, please? Could you please hand me a napkin? (Rachel tries to grab one, but is to slow for his tastes.) Would you--Give me this thing (grabs the napkin holder from her.) all right!! Enough! (to Billy) And you are no longer my friend! We are finished! (gets up to leave) Nada!! No more! You are a bastard for doing this!! (Billy follows him) Get away from me!!
CHANDLER: Well don't you see how gross that is? I mean that's like you using my toothbrush. [Joey gets a sheepish look] You used my toothbrush?
Carol: Listen, we both know youre gonna do it cause youre not a jerk. Okay? So you can either sulk here for a half hour and then go pick them up, or save us both time and sulk in the car.
Ross: Come on guys, I-I really want this guy to like me. It-it would really help me out if you guys were here to make me look good.
Phoebe: Umm, hes here to have sex with you.
Monica: Well, well Ross didnt care enough to be here, so I think hes out. You snooze you lose.
Rachel: Yeah, I do. I think you should go, by yourself, get some distance, clear your head, I think itd be really good.
Rachel: Okay, well then how about a handshake? (She goes to shake his hand but misses and touches his groin.) Oh God I'm sorry! Oh God, I'm sorry! I did not mean to touch thatI mean you there. There. Uhh, okay, so thank-thank you, I'm going to leave now thank you very much uh-huh, thank you soHey! I'll see you Monday! (Exits.)
Chandler: No, I saw a picture of you covered in blueberries.
Joey: They go on one date and youre worried about them getting married?! Hes not you!
Joey: Oh wow Wayne, its not really something you can teach yknow? Its pretty much something youre born with if you(Off Chandlers look)You-you can teach it! Ill show you right how to do it.
Phoebe: (to Joey) You wouldn’t let her have a grape?
Joey: Hey, if you wanna grab a bite before work we'd better get acrimonious. No? Am I getting close?
Rachel: What's the big deal? Why don't you wanna see Janice?
Chandler: Nope... (Monica walks in) Hey... so I'm gonna... put the plates back. You know, I think you were right, I don't think we should use these plates again for a looong time.
Joey: Yeah. You know? You just... Look, you gotta... You gotta think about last night the way she does, okay? Maybe, maybe sleeping together was the perfect way to say goodbye?
Rachel: Oh not-not so much. Umm, what-what do you, what do you mean is there something wrong with Ross?
Phoebe: (yelling at the top of her voice) Go, go, go Alan! Run you, hairy bastard!
ROSS: Dad, I beg you not to finish that sentence.
Ross: (skeptical) That doesn't sound like you... That's Monica talking!
Rachel: Nooo! Nooooo! You lent me Monica's earrings?! I'm not allowed to borrow her stuff!
Joey: Thats okay Ross maybe you need a new picture. Okay? Its not gonna be what you thought, but no matter what theres gonna be a brand new little baby, your baby. Who cares what the picture looks like?
Chandler, Phoebe, and Joey: No, I wasnt gonna ask you that, no.
Ross: Hey-hey, I thought she told you to follow the recipe exactly!
Ross: Yeah-yeah, help me out here, when you come out of the "brain transplant," you are going to be her?
Ross: And what(notices the stenographer is still typing)What are you typing that for? Did you hear what she said? We dont get the annulment. Dont type that! What?! Stop typing! (He goes over to where the stenographer is typing and in the process pushes Rachel out of his way.) Hey! Stop typing! (Hes still typing.) Stop typing! Stop typing!!
Joey: R-R-Richard said he wants to marry you?! (Monica nods yes.) And-and Chandlers tellin ya how much he hates marriage?!
Monica: Wait a minute...Joey. Joey you can't ask her out, she's your roommate. It-it'll be way too complicated.
Ross: Jen, I know this may sound a little (makes some kind of crazy noise) But uh, would you maybe wanna grab a cup of coffee sometime, or
Ross: Hey! You were a closed book! Okay? Im not a mind reader! Besides, I hate those conversations. Im horrible at them. Really! Maybe-maybe I need kind of a gesture. Yknow, something that says were moving forward without having to talk about it.
Jill: (awkwardly) Would you like to call somebody? (offering phone)
Rachel: Well Im alone and I just bought fifteen dollars worth of candy bars, what do you think?
Ross: (hugs him) And listen, man, if you wanna be gay, be gay. Doesn't matter to me.
Rachel: Do you got your gracious loser face?
Joey: Uh-huh! I know. Im coming soon to a theater near you! Im in THX! Im unsuitable for children!
JOEY: [to Ross] Hey, so how'd it go with Julie? Did you, did you break her heart?
Ross: Well, that's because you're such a sweet, gentle, uh...Do you, uh, do you...Oh, hey, uh you must need detergent.
Nurse: It's just her water breaking. Calm down, will you?
Rachel: Oh my God, Phoebe, are you gonna go to jail?!
Zack: You guys have such a great place here.
Ross: (laughs) You dont-you dont want to hear about my dream Officer Pretty?
Chandler: Okay, this is good, this is good. All right listen, I have one. Janice likes to cuddle, at night, which, you know I'm all for. But, uh, you know when you want to go to sleep, you want some space. So, uh, how do I tell her that without, you know, accidentally calling her fat or something.
Chandler: Couldnt sleep last night you know, then I started worrying about this big divisional meeting that I have later today, the more I worried about it the more I couldnt sleep. Yknow? I was like, if I fall asleep now Ill get six hours sleep, but if I fall asleep now Ill get five hours sleep. Not matter what I did I couldnt fall asleep.
Rachel: No, you have it, really, I don't want it-
Joey: (to Rachel) Bub!!! (Points at her and quiets Rachel.) (To Dina) I cant believe this! Youre the good one! You went to college! Both years! Who did this to you?!
RACHEL: Ok, ok, ok, moving on, moving on, next question. Ok number 29, have you ever betrayed another goddess for a lightning bearer? Ok, number 30.
Chandler: Oh, they said uh, You dont have insurance here, so stop calling us.
Joey: Yes, but in Drake Remorays body. (Ross laughs unbelievably.) Why is this so hard for you to get? I thought you were a scientist!
Phoebe: Oh right, ok um. Ok so its not just the lie you tell. but its the way you tell it. . For example if you look down at the ground when you're talking, people know you're lying.
Ross: No, no, no... why, because it might get weird for everyone else? Who cares about them. This is about us. Look, I-I've been in love with you since, like, the ninth grade.
Rachel: (touched) You would do that? I never get picked!
Chandler: Apparently my sperm have low motility and you have an inhospitable environment.
Tommy: Oh, you thought, huh? Yeah, well that didnt really work out too well for you did it you idiot!! What are you?! A moron!! Huh?! It says D-13! Okay?! Look youre surrounded by even numbers!! Did that give you some clue?!
Joey: (to the dog) Cmere. Hey. Cmere. Thats Rachel. Shes the one who used to live here. Might as well be honest with youwe love her. But we cant have her. I really miss her. Well, hey, you understand, right? Youre a guy. (thinks about it and picks up the dog and looks) Well, you used to be.
Rachel: Honey, come on! You live far away! You're not related. You lift right out.
Ross: Okay! You guys are getting married tomorrow and-and I couldnt be more thrilled for both of you, but as Monicas older brother I-I have to tell you this. If you ever hurt my little sister, if you ever cause her any unhappiness of any kind, I will hunt you down, and kick your ass! (Chandler laughs.) What? Im-Im-Im serious! (Chandler laughs harder.) ComeHey! Dude! Stop it! Okay? Im-Im not kidding here!
Chandler: Maybe, isnt she the woman who lives below you and has sex really loud?
MONICA: I can't believe you married Duncan. I mean how could you not tell me? We lived together, we told each other everything.
Monica: What is the matter with you?!! Why arent you more upset?! Arent you gonna be sad that were not gonna be living together anymore?! I mean arent you gonna miss me at all?!
Phoebe: Umm, this stuffing is amazing. Do you think we should bring them some?
Monica: There's something that we wanna tell you. We decided to name the girl-baby Erica.
Monica: Well I guess there is no harm in telling you now, Rachel and Ross are gonna have a baby.
Joey: I will be okay! Look Chandler, you gotta get it out of your head that I cant take care of myself. Okay? Look, Im not gonna miss you helping me out with money. The only thing that Im gonna miss is you. And now the dog.
Chandler: What are you talking about? We love Schhteve! Schhteve was schhexy!.. Sorry.
Ross: Well, I tell you what. Why dont we uh, why dont we just stay here? Lets not see a movie, well just hang.
Chandler: Okay, what do you guys think?
Rachel: Okay sweetie, you can do it. Just open up and put it in your mouth.