words in movies
CHANDLER: I'm tellin' you, she leaned back, I could see her brain.
MONICA: How many perfectly fine women are you gonna reject over the most superficial insignificant things?
CHANDLER: You or me?
JOEY: You guys are messin' with me, right?
PHOEBE: You name one woman that you broke up with for a real reason.
RACHEL: You don't have birds.
MR. HECKLES: Thank you. I'm going to rejoin my dinner party.
CHANDLER: Ok, Janice. Janice. You gotta give me Janice. That wasn't about being picky.
ROSS: We'll give you Janice.
MR. TREEGER: I know. I was sweepin' yesterday. It coulda been me.ROSS: Sure, sweepin'. You never know.
MR. TREEGER: You never know.
PHOEBE: I'm sorry, but sometimes they need help. That's fine. Go ahead and scoff. You know, there're a lot of things that I don't believe in, but that doesn't mean they're not true.
ROSS: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What, you don't, uh, you don't believe in evolution?
ROSS: You don't believe in evolution?
PHOEBE: I don't know, it's just, you know...monkeys, Darwin, you know, it's a, it's a nice story, I just think it's a little too easy.
ROSS: Uh, excuse me. Evolution is not for you to buy, Phoebe. Evolution is scientific fact, like, like, like the air we breathe, like gravity.
ROSS: You uh, you don't believe in gravity?
PHOEBE: Well, it's not so much that you know, like I don't believe in it, you know, it's just...I don't know, lately I get the feeling that I'm not so much being pulled down as I am being pushed.
MR. TREEGER: There she is. And over there, that's the other one. This is Mr. Buddy Boyle, Mr. Heckles' attorney. He'd like to talk to you.
MONICA: What can we do for you?
MR. BOYLE: All right, there was none. Let's talk signing. You be noisy girl number one, you be noisy girl number two.
MONICA: I can't believe that this whole time we thought he hated us. I mean, isn't it amazing how much you can touch someone's life, without even knowing it?...Would you look at this dump? He hated us. This is his final revenge!
RACHEL: Have you ever seen so much crap?
ROSS: How can you not believe in evolution?
ROSS: Pheebs, I have studied evolution my entire adult life. Ok, I can tell you, we have collected fossils from all over the world that actually show the evolution of different species, ok? You can literally see them evolving through time.
PHOEBE: Really? You can actually see it?
ROSS: You bet. In the U.S., China, Africa, all over.
ROSS: Well, there you go.
MONICA: You don't have any stuff.
RACHEL: You still think of it as your apartment, don't you?
RACHEL: Yes you do. You think of it as your apartment, and I'm just somebody who rents a room.
RACHEL: Ok, while you "mmm" on it for awhile, I'm gonna go find a place for my new lamp.
ROSS: Ok, Pheebs. See how I'm making these little toys move? Opposable thumbs. Without evolution, how do you explain opposable thumbs?
PHOEBE: Look, can't we just say that you believe in something, and I don't.
PHOEBE: What is this obsessive need you have to make everyone agree with you? No, what's that all about? I think, I think maybe it's time you put Ross under the microscope.
JOEY: "Heckles, you crack me up in science class. You're the funniest kid in school.
CHANDLER: Wow, Heckles was voted class clown, and so was I. He was right. Would you listen to that?
JOEY: So, you were both dorks. Big deal.
CHANDLER: I just think it's weird, you know? Heckles and me, Heckles, and me, me and Heckles...Would you knock it off?
JOEY: Have you been here all night?
JOEY: All right, you know what we gotta do? We gotta get you outta here. Come on, I'll buy you breakfast, let's go.
CHANDLER: How do you know that? How?
JOEY: I don't know, I'm just tryin' to help you out.
CHANDLER: You'll see, you guys are all gonna go off and get married, and I'm gonna end up alone. Will you promise me something? When you're married, will you invite me over for holidays?
JOEY: You can come over and watch the Super Bowl. Every year, all right?
CHANDLER: You know what? I'm not gonna end up like this. I'll see you man.
PHOEBE: Janice? You called Janice?
CHANDLER: Yes, Janice. Why is that so difficult for you to comprehend?
ROSS: You remember Janice, right?
JANICE: Is it yours? Ha! You wish, Chandler Bing. You are looking at a married lady now.
CHANDLER: You couldn't have told me about this on the phone?
MONICA: Hey, Rache. You know what we haven't played in a while?
MONICA: Did you know I was allergic to shellfish?
ROSS: Ok, Phoebe, this is it. In this briefcase I carry actual scientific facts. A briefcase of facts, if you will. Some of these fossils are over 200 million years old.
PHOEBE: Ok, look, before you even start, I'm not denying evolution, ok, I'm just saying that it's one of the possibilities.
PHOEBE: Ok, Ross, could you just open your mind like this much, ok? Wasn't there a time when the brightest minds in the world believed that the world was flat? And, up until like what, 50 years ago, you all thought the atom was the smallest thing, until you split it open, and this like, whole mess of crap came out. Now, are you telling me that you are so unbelievably arrogant that you can't admit that there's a teeny tiny possibility that you could be wrong about this?
PHOEBE: I can't believe you caved.
PHOEBE: You just abandoned your whole belief system. I mean, before, I didn't agree with you, but at least I respected you. How, how, how are you going to go into work tomorrow? How, how are you going to face the other science guys? How, how are you going to face yourself? Oh! That was fun. So who's hungry?
PHOEBE: Ok, I didn't see it, because I was putting on my jacket, but I uh want to believe you.
RACHEL: Ok, you win.
CHANDLER: If I'm gonna be an old, lonely man, I'm gonna need a thing, you know, a hook, like that guy on the subway who eats his own face. So I figure I'll be Crazy Man with a Snake, y=know. Crazy Snake Man. And I'll get more snakes, call them my babies, kids will walk past my place, they will run. "Run away from Crazy Snake Man," they'll shout!
MONICA: You have got to get over this. You're not gonna end up alone.
RACHEL: Chandler, you have just described virtually every man that we have ever gone out with.
MONICA: You are not a freak. You're a guy.
RACHEL: She's right. She's right. You are no different than the rest of them.
MONICA: Wait a minute, wait a minute. Yes he is. You are totally different.
MONICA: No, honey, in a wonderful way. You know what you want now. Most guys don't even have a clue. You are ready to take risks, you are ready to be vulnerable, and intimate with someone.
PHOEBE: Chandler, you called Janice! That's how much you wanted to be with someone!
MONICA: You made it!
RACHEL: You are ready to make a commitment!
RACHEL: What you got there? Something else that's not yours that you can break?
MONICA: No. Um, I know you like this, and I want you to have it. I think it'll look good in our apartment.
RACHEL: Thank you.
CHANDLER: Hey. Well, you will all be pleased to know that I have a date tomorrow night. This woman, Alison, from work. She's great. She's pretty, she's smart. And uh, I've been holding off on asking her out in the past, because she has an unusually large head. But, I'm not gonna let that stuff hang me up anymore. Look at me. I'm growing.
JOEY: Hey, uh, you can't recycle yearbooks, can you?
JOEY: You want his yearbook?
MONICA: Oh, gosh, this is so weird. I mean, his whole life was in this apartment, and now it's gone. You know, I think it would be nice if we just took a few moments, for Mr. Heckles. I mean, he was kind of a pain, he was, but, he was a person. You're all going to hell.
CHANDLER: Takin' that with you, huh?
ROSS: You comin'?
ALISON: Oh, my major was totally useless. I mean, how often do you look in the classifieds and see "Philosopher wanted"?
CHANDLER: Sure. (My god, that's a big head! It didn't look this big in the office. Maybe it's the lighting. My head must look like a golf ball at work. All right, don't get hung up on it, quick, quick, list five things you like about her: Nice smile, good dresser...Big head, big head, big head!)
Phoebe: Great! Yeah, could you bring me the newspaper?
Monica: Rachel umm, I was just talking to this guy and I think hell have sex with you.
Pete: Yeah. Monica, I want you there in the front row when I win. I want you close enough to smell the blood. What do you think?
Gunther: Jij hebt seks met ezels. (Translation: You have sex with donkeys.)
Ross: Oh, where are you guys going?
Chandler: Do I still call you Ross?
Monica: I'm sorry. But not that sorry, 'cause you don't have to live with it. Um, we have a reservation under the name Chandler Bing.
Joey: Oh wait, before you tell me what it is! (He plays a drum-roll) Okay, what is it?
Ross: Why dont you come, I mean, I-I have two tickets, why not?
Ross: Because you sent away the dog!
Rachel: Youre gonna be late! Go! Go! (He runs out.)
Richard: Nice to meet you Joey.
Joey: I think you did.
Joey: Man, Im starving! What the hell was I thinking at dinner?! "Do you want soup or salad?" Both! Always order both!
Chandler: mmm That's enough about you!
Chandler: Okay, but don't you think this is a little extreme?
Chandler: Id like to toast, Ross and Emily. Of course, my big toast will be tomorrow at the wedding, so this is kind of my little toast or Melba toast, if you will. (No one in the room laughs. He starts to get flustered.) Okay. I known Ross for a long time. In fact, I knew him when he was going out with his first girlfriend. (Ross looks embarrassed.) And I thought things were going to work out for him..Until the day he over inflated her. (He laughs. Jack looks at Judy and no one in the room laughs.) Ohh, Dear God.. (A cellular phone rings.)
Rachel: Phoebe, come on can we finish this later? Cause I wanna go running before it gets dark. Oh! Why don't you come with me?!
Ross: You were incredible! Brand new woman, ladies and gentlemen.
Joey: Hey! (To Chandler) Dude, some guy just called for you.
Monica: Ok, then, why are you... (she opens her robe revealing a nice black dress) all dressed up??
Rachel: You guys are gonna love meee! Okay, check it out, Thursday night, five tickets, Calvin Klein lingerie show, and you guys are coming with me. (theyre all silent and look away) Okay, I said that out loud right?
Joey: Yep. Hey, what do you say we make it a double feature?
Melissa: (excitedly) Are you?!
Rachel: Noo! Oh no! No! God no! He should not get back together with her. I know that! You know that! Even Ross knows that! But that still doesnt give us the right to erase his message!
Monica: It-its so great to see you both here.
Mr. Geller: of course you can kick his ass son.
Rachel: She could be you.
ROSS: No, you let me fini...
Joey: Two thousand dollars!? What do you think I am? I soap opera star!?
Rachel: You just dont look old enough to have a twenty-year-old daughter.
Phoebe: There is nothing wrong with Jake! Okay? He is all man! Im thinking even more than you.
Joey: Oh sureAnd hey, dont get me wrong, I am so happy for you guys. I just I miss hanging out just-just us, yknow?
Joey: Hey! Where have you been?
Janice: Oh, I wish. Look, honey, you have that report to finish, and I gotta go see my lawyer.
Joey: oh, I didn't know you liked French fries. Help yourself! What's mine is yours. (Sarah reaches over and takes a few fries)
Rachel: But wait you said everything was gonna be okay.
Frank Sr.: Thank you. All right.
Ross: Ugh. Well, were just gonna have to jump. (Joey looks at him.) Yeah. Now, were gonna have to make sure to land to the right of that patch of ice, okay? Not hit the dumpster on the other side and uh, and try to avoid that-that weird brownish red stuff in the middle. So, when you get down there you go up to the roof and you let me in.
Rachel: Ohh wow! Im sorry, but Ross you kicked off your shoes!
MONICA: Oh, absolutely. Yeah, you know I'm not even thinking about that thing that we're not supposed to think about.
Monica: It's weird, but you know what I don't wanna throw this away. I mean this is like all I have left of him, gross, drain hair. Ooh! (drops it in Ross's cereal)
Phoebe: You know if you want, we can sneak the dog back in and Chandler wouldn't even know.
Joey: (climbing down from his chair) Do you uh, do youready for a refill?
JOEY: Hey, how much did you guys tip the super this year?
Joey: Oh you should, its great.
Monica: (gets up and gasps) Oh my God! Rachel!! (Rachel is stunned to see that her long lost friend is still fat.) (Monica goes over and gives Rachel a big bear hug, which is quite easy for her.) You look terrific!
Ross: (sitting down) Hey, what are you guys, what are you guys talking about?
The Assistant Director: You are now.
Phoebe: Thank you. (She pats him on his head.)
Joey: Shhh! (Pause) Man, you made me lose it! (He goes into the map again.)
Phoebe: This used to be your room? (She nods Yes) Wow! You mustve been in really good shape as a kid.
Monica: I don't know. I mean, you saw him do a love scene, so maybe you don't have a thing for Joey, maybe you have a thing for Drake.
Joey: Thats not a bad idea. Yeah. Okay, but if I got to turn on the charm tomorrow Im not wasting anymore of it over here with you guys. (Starts to leave, but stops and turns to Phoebe.) Well, actually I got a little bit saved for you Pheebs. (Exits.)
Phoebe: Stating the obvious, but thank you. And its not weird is it.
Rachel: You WHAT? You sang... to our baby daughter... a song about a guy who likes to have sex with women with giant asses?
PHOEBE: So, do you have any other possibilities?
Rachel: (really excited) Great!! It was very, very nice to meet you sir--Ow! Hey! What are you doing?! Are you crazy! (He took out that thing they use to look at people's retinas and looked at Rachel's when she was shaking his hand causing her to flinch and scream at him.)
Rachel: (pause) You have a son!
Ross: So, can you trust me?
Monica: (jumping up) Rachel! You okay?
Phoebe: Umm, you might even say that she pulled a Monica. (They both look at her) (to Monica) She doesnt know we switched it. (Monica nods her head No.)
Joey: You know what it is? It's a nice place but I gotta see I don't know if I see myself living here. Oh, oh, oh, let me see... (Joey sits down on the couch, mimes opening a can and puts his hand down his pants) Yeah, I could see it.
Joey: Are you drunk?
RACHEL: Well, so what're you gonna do?
Rachel: Yes you do, if you're going to make me feel guilty for getting a free massage!
Ross: Umm, he said he thought I was funny. So (Rachel stares at him.) Okay, look-look umm, let's just go downstairs, we'll have some fun, and you will forget all about it.
Chandler: Here's the thing, Janice. You know, I mean, it's like we're different. I'm like the bing, bing, bing. You're like the boom, boom, (Chandler flails his hand out and hits Janice in the eye)... boom.
Ross: No! Oh, no-no-no. Hey, you weren't bad, you've been very good, Ben.
Rachel: Honey um, honey, you do realise that we dont keep the womens lingerie here in the office?
Monica: Ross is really strong! Okay, hes the strongest out of all three of you! (Joey looks at her.) Except for Joey.
Chandler: I know, I went to the tanning place and the same thing happened to me. You have to let me in.
Ross: (noticing the outfit he is wearing) Whatd you do, take him whaling?
Joey: Thank you. Thank you.
Rachel: You look so beautiful.
Ross: Fine. Youll-youll watch it on video when we get back.
Rachel: Ok! Can't believe I'm risking this again, but you're on! All right Joe, you remember the rules! Heads I win, tails you lose.
Chandler: (excitedly) Are you telling me that you bought the chair that is making all other lounge systems obsolete? The chair that Sit magazine called the Chair of the Year?
Ross: Whats the matter? You okay?
Phoebe: Why dont you ask him out?
PHOEBE: I'm so sorry honey, but, okay, Rachel gave this guy her number and, um, she doesn't want Ross to answer the phone.� So, you have to intercept all his calls.
RACHEL: Look, Chandler, he has moved on, OK, you have to too.
Ross: Absolutely. (Very Squeaky.) I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really, (deep voice) I'm fine. I'm not saying I wasn't a little surprised to see you guys kissing. I mean, at first I was like.. (Screams.) But now that I've had time to absorb it; Lovin' this.
Phoebe: Yeah, yknow what I noticed Rachel? He scares easy. Is that the kind of guy youd like to take to a ball? "Hey Sebastian, would you like to dance?" (Imitates him.) "Uhh, okayI gotta go!"
ROSS: Look, don't blame us. You guys coulda been there, you know.
Monica: Phoebe, it's not what you wear. It's sort of your songs... I just don't think you should play at the restaurant anymore.
Monica: Are you okay?
Monica: Well, youre-youre sweating.
Chandler: Ok, we all laughed when you did it with the stuffing, but that's not funny anymore.
Joey: Wow! (Tearing up) Well, uh Hey! Im really happy for you guys! Congratulations! (Kisses Monica on the cheek) See you later. (Starts for the door on the verge of tears as Monica stops him.)
Richard: As were you.
Joey: Thats what you told me.
Young Ethan: Well it's somewhere in between. You see, in a strictly technical sense, of course, I'm not uh..., well I, I mean I haven't ever uh...
Monica: All you had to do was buy the card!
Phoebe: You know?!
Chandler: You dont know?
Phoebe: No! No! I'm talking you up to people. Just give it a little time, all right? Relax, get something to eat! Okay?
Chandler: Are you Joey?
Monica: (as Rachel) Hi, Dad. No, no, it's me. (Getting up to move further away from Rachel) li-listen, Dad, I can't talk right now, um, but there's something, um... there's something that I've been meaning to tell you...
Monica: Honey, thanks for trying to figure out a way, but if you're going to Tulsa, I wanna go with you.