words in movies
Rachel: Yeah? Well, you should know. Youve bought like a billion of em.
Ross: Yeah, you didnt get one.
Joey: Okay listen, how are you gonna ask her?
Joey: Youre gonna mess it up let me do it.
Rachel: Are any of you guys free tonight? My boss is hosting this charity event for underprivileged kids and the more people I bring, the better I look. So, Monica? Chandler?
Joey: Where are you going?
Rachel: How about you guys? (Points to Phoebe and Joey.)
Chandler: Well, you could also give back the money you owe me.
Rachel: Hey! Ross, listen can you come to a charity event tonight?
Chandler: Oh, so youre already doing your part for the kids.
Monica: Ross let me ask you a question. All jokes aside, where is this relationship going?
Monica: Do you really see this as a long-term thing?
Phoebe: Yknow, you are 12 years older than her.
Ross: Uh-uhWow! Uh, I thought you guys were just like making jokes, I had no idea. What you know what? You guys are wrong. Uh yes, there is a chronological age difference but I never notice it. You know why? Because she is very mature. Besides, it doesnt really matter to me what you guys think. I mean, Im the one dating Elizabeth, not you!
Chandler: Will you marry me? Will you marry me? (Makes like a gun with his fingers.) Hey, you marry me! (He gives up as Joey, Rachel, Phoebe, and Ross slink in all excited.) Whats going on little elves?
Joey: Its the big night! We wanted to wish you good luck!
Ross: Yeah, yeah you have the ring?
Chandler: Okay, now will you guys get out of here? I want this is to be a surprise and shes gonna know.
Ross: (to the rest of them) Yeah-yeah you guys. Get out of here!
Chandler: (To Monica) You are beautiful.
Monica: Oh, thank you! (The gang exhibits signs of quiet apprehension and wears knowing glances.) (Monica giggles.) Whats going on?
Rachel: Oh! Thank you!
Rachel: Uh well, uh this is a silent auction. They lay out all the stuff here and then you write down your offer and then the highest bid gets it.
Mr. Thompson: Nice to see you Rachel.
Mr. Thompson: So glad you brought someone.
Mr. Thompson: Well, I hope youre gonna bid on some things Rachel.
Rachel: Thank you. (Mr. Thompson walks away and after hes left.) Okay, (writing her bid down) twenty dollars.
Ross: Oh, you have to call the police! Thats what I did to the kids in my building!
Ross: Oh! (Does a laugh/groan.) Listen umm, I, I just stopped by to see if you wanted to see this play tonight. Umm, its supposed to be excellent. The director is the same
Elizabeth: (To Ross) You want some?! (Starts to squirt the Kamikaze at him.)
Ross: No! Okay! Okay! (Stops her.) Okay, look, can I, can I just-just talk to you for a second?
Ross: Uh, so this play umm, what do you think? Its-its gotten great reviews! Yknow the uh
The Girls: You put your balloons down!!
First Dorm Guy: You put your balloons down!!
Phoebe: Hey you guys! Look!
Rachel: What are you doing?
Phoebe: You just cant stand anyone else enjoying themselves cant you?
Rachel: Joey! It is an auction! You dont guess, you buy!
Phoebe: Forget her! You enjoy this!! (Pulls him back up and starts applauding again. Joey waves and does a salute.]
Monica: What are you doing?
Monica: Are you okay?
Chandler: Yes! Yes! Im good! Are you good? Are you good? Is everythingare youare you perrr-perfect?!
Chandler: Oh, yeah. (Starts to take it off and then realizes) Uh, no you cant have my jacket! Because then I would be cold! If you thought that you were going to be cold, you shouldve brought your own jacket. But uh, other than that, are you okay? Are you okay?
Monica: (laughs) Are you sure youre okay?
Chandler: Yes! Im fine. In fact Ive been fine for a long time now and I think, the reason is you.
Chandler: Okay umm, before I meant you I had really little life and I couldnt imagine growing old with
Monica: Hey, its good to see you!
Richard: You too, you let uh, your hair grow long.
Monica: YeahOh thats right. You, you always wanted me too. Hey, I see you got your mustache back.
Chandler: (to Richards date) And uh, you dont have a mustache which is good. (She just smiles.) Im Chandler; I make jokes when Im uncomfortable.
Monica: (to Richard) Its good to see you
Matire'd: (to Richard) Youre tables ready sir.
Richard: Oh. Good to see you guys.
Matire'd: (motioning to the empty table next to Monica and Chandlers) Or if you prefer, this table is available.
Rachel: What were you thinking?!
Rachel: Phoebe, dont you think youve had enough to drink?
Rachel: How is you drinking helping the kids?
Rachel: (stopping him) Hey! You cant leave Joey! You agreed to buy that boat, all right?! That is a contract! And plus if you leave, my boss is gonna kill me!
Rachel: I know. Okay. (Whispering and thinking.) Okay. Okay. All right. All right, this is what were gonna do, we are gonna go to the next highest bidder, and we are just gonna let them buy it, and then youre just gonna pay the difference.
Monica: So I hide in the shower and the next thing you know theyre going at it right on the bathroom floor.
Richard: Its so great seeing you guys again. Id like to make a toast. (Everyone raises their glasses) Uh, as a poet once said, "In the sweetness of friendship, let there be laughter and sharing of pleasures for in the due of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed."
Ross: Oh my God, you guys!! (Hes excited about what he thought happened.)
Chandler: (stopping him from going any further) Before you say anything, have we got a story for you! Guess who we bumped into at dinner!
Chandler: Oh you knew that. Good!
Monica: I thought you were going out with Elizabeth.
Ross: Yknow, maybe she is too young for me. Yknow, when I was over there and she was running around with her friends, I felt like I was a baby-sitter. I finally started to see what you guys were talking about. I dont know what to do.
Monica: Why dont you just weigh out the good stuff about the relationship against the bad stuff. I mean thats what I did when I first (looks at Chandler and pauses) weighing stuff.
Monica: If the school finds out youre fired.
Monica: Look Ross, the only question you need to ask is, "Do you see a future?" I mean like do you see yourself marrying her? (Ross pauses in consideration.) Oh my God! You did it already! You married her, didnt you?!
Chandler: Hey, you have to forget about Elizabeth. I mean if youre not careful you may not get married at all this year!
Rachel: (To Phoebe) Why do you care about the guy who won the Paris trip?
Rachel: Oh well, hello. This is your lucky day Mr. Bowmont, the uh gentleman day sailer as just become available again and I believe that you made a bid of $18,000.
Joey: Are you kidding me?! Shes gonna this boat!
Rachel: Okay look, let me paint you a little picture. (She sits down next to him.) All right, you are settin sail up the Hudson! Youve got the wind in your h(sees that hes bald)arms! You-you get all that peace and quiet that youve always wanted! You get back to nature! You can go fishin! You canooh, you can get one of those little hats and have people call you captain, and then when youre old, Cappy.
Joey: All that stuff you just said? I want that!
Rachel: But Joey you dont have $20,000!
Joey: Oh my God, youre back!
Monica: Why do you want to see my hand?
Phoebe: Eww! Oh, its all dirty. You should throw this out.
Chandler: (after the door closes) What did you guys just do?!
Chandler: Im gonna do it tomorrow yknow, and-and surprise her, but now youve ruined it!
Phoebe: Yeah! Yeah! Convince her that-that youre scared of commitment! Convince her that youre a little coward!
Joey: Hey, being you is finally gonna pay off! (They give each other fives.)
Rachel: (entering) Hey! (Sees Monica, gasps, and runs over to her.) Oh my God youre here, let me see your hand!!
Phoebe: No, youre too late!!! She already took out the trash!!!
Elizabeth: You suck!!
Monica: What are you up too?
Chandler: Oh, just hanging out, talkin about uh, websites. (Joey laughs.) Yeah, we saw this really interesting website about marriage and how totally unnecessary it is and how its just a way for the government to keep tabs on you.
Monica: Well thats a little crazy. Although I am yknow glad to hear that youre branching out on what you look at on the Internet.
Richard: Well, it was great seeing you the other night.
Monica: Oh, good to see you too. Did you come down here to tell me that?
Richard: No! I came here to tell you something else. (Pause) I came here (Pause) to tell you I still love you.
Monica: What uhWhat did youWhat?!
Richard: I still love you. And I know I probably shouldnt even be here telling you this, I mean youre with Chandler a guy I really like, and if you say hes straight Ill believe you! After seeing ya the other night I knew if I didnt tell ya Id regret it for the rest of my life. Letting you go was the stupidest thing I ever did.
Monica: Yknow youre really not supposed to be back here!
Richard: Well yeah, Im sorry. I know this is the wrong time and the wrong place but I had to tell ya! I wanna spend my life with you. I wanna marry you. I wanna have kids with you.
Monica: What the Yes youre too late! Where was all this three years ago?!
Richard: Well I know I was an idiot! And I tried to forget you, I really did! Yknow after we had lunch last year I spent six months in Africa trying to get you out of my head!
Monica: What were you doing in Africa?
Monica: Ohhh! What are you doing to me?! Oh look, I-I Im sorry but umm, this-this-this-this is not going to happen.
Richard: Okay thats fine, Ill walk away. And Ill never bother you again, but only if you tell me Chandlers willing to give you everything I am.
Richard: You are?
Joey: Hey uh, have you guys scene Chandler?
Monica: So that marriage stuff that you were saying yesterday, you dont really believe that do you?
Chandler: If marriage worked, Id be all for it. But do you know what the divorce rate in this country is? 97%.
Monica: Wait a minute. Are you honestly telling me that-that you may never want to get married?
Chandler: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! What is all this pressure?! Is this some new kind of strategy? Why dont you put down your copy of The Rules huh mantrap?!
Phoebe: What do you mean?
Phoebe: You mean a backup?
Rachel: You do?
Rachel: Are you serious?!
Rachel: Wh So If neither of you are married by the time youre 40, youre gonna marry Joey.
Monica: Have you seen Rachel? Or a mirror?
Monica: Im just having one of those days where you realize youre in a dead-end relationship!
Joey: Chandler giving you a hard time huh?
Joey: Well, you know Chandler.
Joey: Maybe you changed?
Joey: R-R-Richard said he wants to marry you?! (Monica nods yes.) And-and Chandlers tellin ya how much he hates marriage?!
Monica: You just told me that he hates marriage! That-that hes a-a complex fellow whos unlikely to take a wife! That-that hes against marriage and always will be!
Joey: You got that from what I said?!
Ross: What happened you guys?
Rachel: Hey you!
Rachel: Oh thank you. Hey yknow, Im so sorry to hear about you and Elizabeth.
Rachel: So what do you say we make a pact? If you and I are both single by the time were 40, we get married. I mean, we know each other, we like each other, and weve-weve already slept together so yknow therell be no surprises there! You know what I mean? No like, "Whats that?!"
Joey: Where the hell have you been?!
Chandler: Well what Yknow what Im gonna do? Im gonna go over there; Im gonna kick his ass! (Pause) Will you help me?!
Chandler: Youre right.
Richard: I didnt ask. You wanna come in?
Richard: Uh, no! No! Thats art! If it bothers you I can put my art out.
Richard: So Monica let me ask you a question. Yknow, since we broke up do you ever, think about me?
Monica: Uh yeah, I-I actually I thought about you a couple months ago.
Richard: Yeah hes no good. Do you ever (pause) think about me in a (pause) non-eye doctor way?
Monica: But getting over was the hardest thing that Ive ever had to do. And I never let myself think about you.
Rachel: Phoebe! You picked Joey and Ross?! You can not have two backups!
Ross: Phoebe, how could you do this to me?!
Phoebe: I dontLook I dont know what youre complaining about now? You were both aware of the situation!
Rachel: Phoebe you cant have both of them! You have to pick one!
Phoebe: No wait! JustOkayJust wait! You guys! Wait you guys! Dont make any rash decisions, okay? Just remember my promise, when we get married, three times a week.
Phoebe: Left! (Rachel hands her the napkin in her left hand and they both unfold and read them.) Thank you.
Rachel: Youre welcome.
Monica: I missed this apartment! Now, this is a grown-ups apartment! Yknow, I-I should be with a grown-up, do you know what I mean?!
Richard: Yeah! Youre saying, you need to be with someone more mature. Maybe someone with, a license to practice medicine. Or a mustache.
Monica: Yknow, lets face it, Im not a kid anymore! I-I need to be with someone who-who wants the same things that I do! I mean coming to my place of work and telling me that you love me, I want that! Talking about pig sex over lunch, I dont want that!
Monica: Fair? Please dont even talk to me about fair! Fair wouldve been you wanting to marry me back then! Or fair wouldve been Chandler wanting to marry me now! Believe me, nothing about this is fair! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing!
Richard: Yeah, I understand. Take as much time as you want. (Pause) Ten, even twenty minutes if you need it. Ill be here. Not smoking. (Monica leaves.)
Chandler: Where is she? Im not scared of you! (Averts his eyes and walks in.)
Chandler: Oh my God, I cant believe this! Yknow, I thought I thought you were a good guy.
Chandler: Nothing happened? Nothing? So you didnt tell my girlfriend that you love her?
Chandler: Yknow what? I cant believe this! Do you know what you did? My girlfriend is out there thinking things over! You made my girlfriend think!!
Richard: Well, apparently Im willing to offer her things that you are not.
Chandler: It was working until you showed up, you big tree! I mean, this isnt fair. You had your chance with her! You had your chance and you blew it! And this is my chance and I am not going to blow it because we are meant for each other! And this is all just been one stupid mistake! (Sits down heavily.) I was gonna propose tonight.
Richard: You were gonna propose? (Sits on the arm of the couch.)
Chandler: Yeah I even (pause) got a ring. (Puts in on the center cushion.) Did you get a ring?
Richard: No I dont have a ring! (Pause) You go get her Chandler. (Pause) And can I give you a piece of advice? If you do get her, dont let her go. Trust me.
Chandler: Yknow Richard you are a good guy.
Chandler: I cant talk to you now, I gotta find Monica!
Chandler: What are you talking about?
Joey: She was all crying. She-she said you guys want different things, and that and that she needed time to think.
Chandler: Well why didnt you stop her?! Why didnt you just tell her it was a plan?!
Joey: To her parents I think and she said you shouldnt call her. But if I were you I would.
Monica: You wanted it to be a surprise.
Chandler: Okay! (He joins her on one knee) Okay! Okay! Oh God, I thought (Starting to cry, pauses) Wait a minute, I-I can do this. (Pause) I thought that it mattered what I said or where I said it. Then I realized the only thing that matters is that you, (Pause) you make me happier than I ever thought I could be. (Starting to cry again.) And if youll let me, I will spend the rest of my life trying to make you feel the same way. (Pause as he gets out the ring.) Monica, will you marry me?
Monica: I knew you were likely to take a wife!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, its just Monica and Chandler dancing to Wonderful Tonight on the Slowhand album by Eric Clapton. And you can buy that album from the CFSI, just click on the CDNow link.]
Phoebe: Not even if you just pretend that it's milk?
Rachel: You can?
Rachel: Wow! Have you ever rescued anyone from a burning building before?
Joey: Yeah, thats what I was afraid of.. Okay, uhh Look Janine I really want you to feel at home here, but some of this new stuff. Its too girly.
Chandler: Hi. You guys have any wrapping paper?
Phoebe: (returning) Hey you guys, Hums While He Pees just asked me out!
CHANDLER: Yeah. Just let me grab my jacket and tell you I had sex today.
Rachel: Joey, youre such an amazing actor! (He smiles.) How do you know where Dr. Drake Remoray leaves off and Joey Tribbiani begins?
Chandler: I never want to leave you again!
Chandler: (to Ross) You be cool. (He opens the door and lets her in as they all turn there backs on her.)
Phoebe: Okay, how do you feel now?
PHOEBE: Well you said that he's paying the people who are playing.
Chandler: How did you? How? How?
Monica: Wow! And you got a petticure. Your feet are all dressed up.
Joey: But you can't stay with Phoebe, Ross! We're-we're roomies!
Phoebe: You know.. you let your guard down, you start to really care about someone, and I just- I- (starts chewing her hair)
Joey: Hey! Dont you hang up on me! Ill marry you and me right now! I have the power!
Phoebe: If I havent said it before: shes a lucky, lucky lady! So, where are you going towhat the mother of crap is up with this stuff? (Referring to the taffy, which shes been chewing this whole time.) Oh, God. Is it gum, is it food? Whats the deal? (she swallows it, finally) Oh, its nice! May I try a pink one?
Joey: Wait, well, where did you get it from?!
Mike: Sure (looks confused) who are you?
Joey: What? You ordered pizza without me?!
Monica: Youll see.
Joey: Over there! (Points to the couch) Before, with the bills! You tried to give some charity, I said "No," you dropped it. Okay? Then we had a nice last night together, we had some fun, we gambled, nobody tried to give anybody any money! Now out of the blue, you start with the charity thing again!
Chandler: Oh we did, and you still have all your lamps.
Rachel: Yes, they will! You know what you should do? Just go take a walk, all right? I know your size and I’m... I’m gonna pick up some really good stuff for you.
Rachel: Do you remember where the duck food is?
Phoebe: Uhm... You know, once we're in the air and the captain turns off the seatbelt sign... you feel free to roam about my cabin...
PHOEBE: You wanna try it again?
Joey: You have Knicks tickets?
Joey: No youre not! Not to me!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang, except Joey, is there. Phoebe is, well you y'know.]
JOEY: You see this, this is a friend.
Mrs. Geller: I'm so glad you could come Chandler, we've got plenty of food so I hope you're hungry.
Joey: Oh-oh-oh-oh, how I do it is, I look a woman up and down and say, "Hey, how you doin?"
Ross: Oh, now you want a favour?
Frank: Wait a minute, wait, this is because of you?
Monica: Hey, dont mix those up, you could really ruin that lollipop.
Rachel: How?! How do you know?
FBOB: I think you may have a drinking problem.
Monica: Yeah. Umm, Chandler can I talk to you outside for a second?
Mrs. Waltham: Lovely to meet you.
Rachel: But yknow what, if you think its gonna be okay well just work out a system. Yknow, itll be like college, Ill hang a hanger on the door and put a sign, "Come back later, Im gettin lucky." (Laughs.)
Joey: What, are you crazy? When a blind man gets his sight back, does he walk around like this? (Joey closes his eyes and walks around with arms spread.)
Rachel: Ohh, thank you, thank you, thank you.
RACHEL: This is it, isn't it? I mean, this is what my life is gonna be like. My mom there, my dad there. Thanksgiving, Christmas. She gets the house, he's in some condo my sister's gonna decorate with wicker. Oh, Chandler how did you get through this?
Phoebe: Um, yeah. Look, I mean, Im not saying shes like evil or anything. She just, you know, shes always breaking my stuff. When I was eight, and I wouldnt let her have my Judy Jetson thermos, so she threw it under the bus. And then, oh, and then there was Randy Brown, who was like... Have you ever had a boyfriend who was like your best friend?
Ross: No, no you don't understand the animal hospital is way across town he's choking I don't know what else to do.
Chandler: (into receiver)Hello? Hey Charlie, what do you know?
Joey: Oh my God! Is that why you guys had to get married?!
Joey: (to Rachel) I bet I stopped listening before you did.
Rachel: Chandler, thats not enough. I mean what if she gets you a great present, two medium presents, and a bunch of little presents? And youve just gotten her one great present? I mean thats just gonna make her feel bad. Why would you do that to her Chandler? Why? Why?
Rachel: (seeing him) Chandler, what are you doing? There is a trash can right there.
Ross: A ferry? My baby is going on a ferry? Do you have any idea how dangerous those are?!
Chloe: Thats so great for you guys!
WAITER: Well, when you do, just let me know. I'll be right over there on the edge of my seat.
Ross: Yknow, I-Iyouve done a lot of stupid stuff too! Okay?
Gunther: Jij spreekt Nederlands? Dat is te gek. Heb je familie daar? (Translation: You speak Dutch That's cool. Do you have relatives there?)
Joey: I mean, the jobs easy and the moneys good, you know? I guess Im going to be hanging out here anyway. I might as well get paid for it, right? I just feel kind of weird serving you guys.
Liam: You dont say! (We see Ross who is hopping about with the ball and spikes it in his face.)
Ross: (to Joey) It's ok, because they have to get it out of their system, okay (back to Mon and Chan), but you're going to realize, this is the only place, you wanna be.
Guy: You wouldn't return my calls, you sent back my letters....
Chandler: What do you mean?
Charlie: Oh yeah! Hey, save the cork and then we can fill the bottle with water and put it back so they don't charge you.
Joey: Right, right, right, well, she wants to go to all this cultural places and I don't know how to talk about that stuff. You gotta help me out!
Chandler: (coming out of his apartment and seeing Ross) What did you do?
Ross: Oh really? Did she tell you he plays the recorder, recites poetry and bakes Madeleines?
Chandler: You put your fist through the wall?
Chandler: Oh My God! You can do a duet of Ebony and Ivory all by yourself!
Ross: All right, all right, it's just that you left a red sock in with all your whites, and now, everything's kinda pink.
Chandler: Yes, yes I did, but what I didn't say was what I was about to say, what I wanted to say was, uh... would you like to go out with me sometime, thankyou, goodnight. (He walks back to the others but she calls him back.)
Monica: Thats right. (A noise comes from the living room.) Did you hear something?
Monica: Guys, could you please just stop throwing the ball for one minute and just help me find it!
Monica: (To Chandler) Look honey, you dont have to do this, okay? Its the strength you have inside that means the most to me. Youre loyal, youre honest, and you have integrity! Thats the kind of strength that I want in the man that I love!
Monica: I knew you were not okay with that.
Chandler: Yeah you are!!
PHOEBE: I, I don't know what to say. I mean, you know, you're married to someone for six years and you think you know him and then one day says, 'Oh, I'm not gay.'
Chandler: You are an amazing wife. (Monica shrugs) No really you're amazing you were actually gonna do this for me, I mean where do you find the strength and understanding over something like that.
Monica: Yep, yep...You?
Phoebe: Yuh-huh! I was the last one to know when Chandler got bitten by the peacock at the zoo. I was the last one to know when you had a crush on Joey when he was moving in. (Monica gestures at Phoebe to shut up; Joey looks surprised but pleased) Looks like I was second to last.
Ross: Exactly. So you didnt, didnt mention anything to Issac right?
Erica: Thank you. It's really nice to meet you guys, I can't believe I'm here!
Chandler: (to Ross) Maybe you do that next time you get married!
Ross: Rachel says sharing's great and supposedly, you know, we outta be doing it. Do you wanna?
Monica: Im gonna go tell Joey that (laughs) that youre back. I was really worried about you. (Exits.)
Phoebe: Yeah. Its just, you know, its this whole stupid Ursula thing, its...
Danielle: Well, I've been calling you, but it turns out I had your number wrong. And when I finally got the right one from Information, there was no answer. So I thought I'd just come down here, and make sure you were okay.
Ross: But I'm not! (pause). You know what if you're in the mood for Thai food...
MONICA: So what, he's a little older, big deal, I mean he's important to me. Ya know if you ask him, he might take you on his Jag. [walks off]
Joey: These new kids, they never last. Sooner or later, they all...stop lastin'. Listen, uh, what do you say I buy you that cup of coffee now?
Rachel: (crying) No. I cant, youre a totally different person to me now. I used to think of you as somebody that would never, ever hurt me, ever. God, and now I just cant stop picturing with her, I cant, (Ross stands up and backs away) it doesnt matter what you say, or what you do, Ross. Its just changed, everything. Forever.
Phoebe: (singing) Love is sweet as summer showers, love is a wondrous work of art, but your love oh your love, your love...is like a giant pigeon...crapping on my heart. La-la-la-la-la- (some guy gives her some change and to that guy) Thank you. (sings) La-la-la-la...ohhh!
Monica: Y'know what, you can play with my dollhouse.
Ross: You know what, I think weve had all the bad luck were going to have. (He hugs her.)
Young Ethan: Well, if that's what you kids are calling it these days then, yes I am. I uh, I've kinda been waiting for the right person.
Ross: Well youre gonna be a wonderful grandma. (They hug.)
Tour Guide: You mean Dr. Geller?
Chandler: (entering from the bedroom wearing a big, pink bunny costume) Monica! Can I talk to you for a second? Listen, I appreciate you getting me the costume
Dana: Absolutely! But you-you would really feel better about me rejecting you if your actor friend can audition for my movie?
Joey: No, was my best friend. Anyway, I dont know why youre pushing for him so hard. With him out of the way as my best friend, theres a spot open.
Phoebe: Did you stop Rachel?