words in movies
Chandler: Pheebs, can you help me pick out an engagement ring for Monica? I cant figure this out! Its so hard! Should I get her a (turning to each page) Tiffany cut or a Princess cut or aah-ah! Paper cut!
Phoebe: Now, have you told anyone else?
Phoebe: You told me.
Chandler: Well, its because I trust you, youre one of my best friends, and you walked in on me when I was looking at ring brochures.
Phoebe: Yeah well, once again not knocking pays off. I only wish you hadnt been on the toilet.
Ross: Oh perfect, we were just gonna see if you wanted to go.
Joey: Oh, Im sorry. You wanna bite? (Holds his piece out for him.)
Phoebe: Thats easy! You just have to think of him as a-as a jar of pickles that wont open.
Rachel: So what are you saying; I should run him under hot water and bang his head against a table?
Phoebe: No thats what you do when you want to get the truth out of someone.
Paul: (To Rachel) How are you?
Phoebe: So how are things going with you?
Ross: Great to see you!
Paul: Good to see you too!
Ross: How you doing?
Ross: Okay! You take care!
Ross: Hey Pheebs, what-what was the deal with you and Chandler blowing us off before?
Ross: Phoebe, whyd you do it?
Phoebe: I didnt do it! It was Chandler! Hes Hes mad at you!
Phoebe: Please, I think you know why.
Phoebe: Come on Ross, youre a paleontologist, dig a little deeper.
Phoebe: Do you think thats something that hed be mad at you for?
Phoebe: Oh, if thats what you want you then you really should run his head under hot water and bang his head against a table.
Rachel: Okay. Hey, what are you thinking? What are you thinking right now?
Paul: Im thinking that you are looking really fine it that dress.
Paul: Are you talking about having sex?
Rachel: No Paul, I dont know anything about you! Yknow, like-like your childhood! Tell me about your childhood!
Rachel: Okay, well then how about puberty! Come on, thats always a painful time! Yknow your friends invite you to a slumber party and then they stick your hand in warm water while youre sleeping so that you pee in your sleeping bag.
Rachel: Well, youre lucky you never met that bitch Sharon Majesky. Anyway, umm The rest of you life, yknow? Any regrets?
Paul: I wanted a big wheel. And instead my parents got me this little plastic chicken that you hop around on. It was embarrassing; kids made fun of me. That was a pretty tough year.
Rachel: Thats-thats great! See? I already feel like I know you a little better! Thank you. Okay, come on. Now we can go eat. Lets go. (Gets up to leave, but Paul doesnt move.)
Paul: And in fifth grade I got into a fight. Well, it wasnt really a fight. Richard Darinvel bit me on the nose and, and I feel down. I still have a little scare right here (points to it) you can see it.
Rachel: Yeah. Yeah, I-I-I see the scare. Listen, Paul, I think this is really great that-that yknow, you shared your feelings. Its really, its beautiful, but umm, what do you say we go share some food?
Rachel: What?! Wait! What are you talking about?! You love their Kung Pao Chicken!
Phoebe: Okay, so maybe you dont get her a ring. Maybe you-maybe you do something different. Yknow? Maybe you get her an engagement bracelet, yknow? Or an engagement tiara? Orooh! An engagement Revolutionary War musket! (Picks one up from the display in the corner.
Chandler: Yknow, Im so glad I picked you to help me with this.
Phoebe: Huh? Can you just imagine getting down on one knee and handing her this gorgeous piece of weaponry?
Phoebe: (coming over after returning the musket) Wait a minute, no, this is, this is the reason you brought me. Okay? I know how to haggle. So let me handle this from here on out.
Male Jeweler: Can I help you?
Chandler: Sir, can I ask you to umm, could you hold out that ring and ask me to marry you?
Male Jeweler: Okay. (Holds out the ring, deadpan.) Will you marry me?
Phoebe: We will give you $10.
Male Jeweler: (angrily) Are you interested in this ring?!
Male Jeweler: (ignoring her) How would you like to pay?
Chandler: Uh, credit card. (Reaches for it then realizes) Oh no! No-no, but I left my credit card with Joey. (To Phoebe) Okay, Ill go get it. You guard the ring.
Phoebe: Okay. (To the jeweler) Listen, Im sorry about before. Do you have anything her for $10.
Phoebe: Ill give you $1 for them.
Gunther: (handing them the bill) Here you go.
Joey: Hey-hey-hey-ho-ho, I got this one. Here you go. (Hands Gunther Chandlers card.) Yknow I gotta tell ya, sometimes I justI dont get Chandler. Yknow, me and him do stuff all the time without you and you dont get all upset.
Rachel: Oh thats right. Youre the talker. (They both reflect on that briefly) Anyway uh, great idea! Umm, I gotta go to the store; I told him that I would buy him some more tissues.
Rachel: No you dont!
Phoebe: Okay umm, Id also like to try on the tiara. (The male jeweler hands it to her.) Oh yeah. Okay. (Puts it on.) (To the jeweler) What do you think, too much?
Paul: (acting manly to try and cover up his crying) Okay. Chandler, did your dad ever hug you?
Chandler: No, did he hug you?!
Chandler: Well, you can see my dad in Vegas kissing other dads.
Paul: Would you .Would you hug me?
Chandler: Okay, a quick one. Come on hug it out. (Paul rushes over and hugs Chandler tightly.) Oh hey! There you go. (The hug continues.) Okay. (The hug continues.)
Chandler: Do you have my credit card?
Joey: Come on! Itll be fun! Me, you, and Ross, and Paul probably
Phoebe: Oh my God Chandler, the one you picked is gone. Its over!
Chandler: They put you in jail?
Chandler: Phoebe, I asked you to guard the ring!
Ross: I cant believe it. (Pause) Can I tell you something? Im a little mad at him now.
Joey: Can I tell you something? Me too.
Rachel: I dont care about the little dude! I cant! I cannot listen to anymore of this! Yknow, the only person who would want to listen to this is a mental health professional! And then its only because they get paid $100 an hour! Do you know how much money I couldve made listening to you? $2,000! And do you know when I figured that out? While you were talking!
Paul: What?! I cant believe youre trying to stifle me! When just 14 hours ago we figured out that that is exactly what my mother was trying to do to me!
Rachel: Oh Im sorry. I I-I dont meanI didnt mean to stifle you. I This is all just a little overwhelming.
Paul: Oh Rachel, Im so sorry. I didnt mean to overwhelm you. Its just that, when those gates open, you (Starts to breakdown.) Hard to close em. But they are closed now. Believe me.
Rachel: Im so glad, Im so glad you shared. (Feeling his shoulder.) And Im glad that youre done. What do you say we umm (Nods in the direction of the bedroom.)
Chandler: I cant believe I let you talk me into buying this stupid gumball machine looking ring!
Phoebe: Well you certainly cant give her that stupid gumball ring.
Phoebe: Wow! Youre good! After this, we should solve crimes.
Phoebe: Oh, okay. (Walks over to him.) Excuse me sir? Could you come with me please? You have a phone call.
Customer: Do you know who at my office?
Chandler: (to him) Hi! Hi. Okay, there was a slight mix-up at the jewelry store, the ring youre about to propose with was supposed to be held for me. So, Im gonna need to have that back. (The guy isnt sure.) But, in exchange Im willing to trade you this beautiful, more expensive ring. (Looking at the ring.) Ew.
Customer: It is beautiful, but Im gonna use this one. Now, if youll excuse me.
Chandler: No-no! This is my fiancee (Phoebe) and her heart was set on that ring. You dont want to break her heart now do you?
Phoebe: Yeah, do you want to break a dying womans heart?
Customer: Youre dying?!
Chandler: Thank you. Thank you. Thank you! (To his girlfriend) And you are about to marry a wonderful man! (She stunned and hes horrified.) Hey! Im marrying a dead woman!
Ross: So you two are really serious?!
Chandler: Okay! (They hug.) I was gonna wait til uh, it was official yknow? But I got so excited I just had to tell you guys because youre my best friends.
Rachel: (who has just entered) Ugh! No more crying! Please! I just dumped one cry baby, Ill dump you too!
Rachel: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh Chandler!! (Hugs him.) You guys are gonna be so happy!
Ross: You told her before you told us?
Chandler: Well, she walked in when I was looking at the ring brochures. You can understand that, right? (Ross and Joey look at each other and go back to watching the game on TV.) Guys? Guys? (Walks in front of them again.)
RACHEL: Let me tell you something. As a woman there is nothing sexier than a man who does not want to have sex.
Phoebe: So youre not homesick yet?
Joey: It made you feel good, so that makes it selfish. Look, there's no unselfish good deeds, sorry.
Monica: Well, um, look I-I dont want this to come our wrong, but ah, you seem awfully confident for a guy I just told I wasnt attracted too.
ROSS: I was saving you.
Joey: Look, I understand if you came by to hit me, I deserve it.
Monica: Hey, did you get the turkey bast-Oh my God! Oh my God! (She sees someone is stuck in the turkey.) Who is that?
Monica: How bad you wanna smoke, right now.
RACHEL: Well not when they find out you slept with Jason Hurley an hour after he broke up with Monica.
Joey: Thats great, but isnt it gonna bother that people still think youre a porn star?
Phoebe: No, of course not! I also, you know, prepared a reading (she picks up a book). “Sex and the single mother. (pause) Finding your G-spot.
RACHEL: (to Ross) She you in the parking lot.
Phoebe: (looking at Mike) Oh, yeah! (turning to Chandler) Are you telling me you... you're not even... a little turned on by Monica, right now?
Phoebe: Okay, lesson one: chords. Now, I don't know the actual names of the chords but umm, I-I-I made up names for the way my hand looks while I'm doing them. (She starts to show Joey the chords. Transcribers Note: For this one you'll have to use your imagination, 'cause it would take me 50 pages to describe each one. So if you want to see them, you'll have to wait for this episode to come to a TV near you.) (Holding up her hand and then reconfiguring her hand with each name.) So then, this is Bear Claw. Okay, umm, Turkey Leg and Old Lady. (Joey tries to imitate them.)
Phoebe: Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!! Hey!!! (they all stop fighting, Chandler continues to dance.) Look what youre doing to Chandler!! (Chandler finally stops) (to Ross and Rachel) Yeah, look, we know this is really, really hard for you guys. Okay? (Ross starts to leave) You dont, all right you dont have to love each other, okay? You dont, you dont even have to like each other much right now. But please, you have to figure out a way to be around each other.
Phoebe: Look David, if... if you had never left, then... yeah, we'd probably still be together right now, but... you did leave, and I-I'm with Mike and I really care about him...
Clerk: You need to fill out this form. (motions for the next person in line)
Ross: (stares at her briefly) Okay, why are you here?
Phoebe: You cook naked?
Frank: Okay, but isnt sex better when its with one person that you really, really care about.
Monica: They're in the kitchen getting something to eat. Can you believe how nice they are?
Ross: Look I-I dont know whats going on with you and your husband and what is hopefully an adult dog walker, look can I just say not all men are like that.
CHANDLER: (softly) Can you . . . hear him . . . now?
David: Hey! Oh, I was just about to leave. I-I-I-I didnt think you were coming.
Chandler: Im right! Right? There was like no chemistry between them. Before they had heat, and now theres no heat! Now you know what this means, Joey told us what this means!
Rachel: And so I had a lot of work to do so Ross, nice guy that he is, offered to help me out. And then we had a little wine, we got to talking, and the next thing you know out of nowhere Ross comes on to me.
Ross: (shocked) You dont have a valid drivers licenseOkay that is it! Pull over right now!
Joey: Guys, do you think we should ask Ross to come along?
Rachel: Why hasnt he called Rachel? Why? Why? I dont understand. Why? He said hell call. Why? Why? Chandler Im telling you she has flipped out, shes gone crazy!
Monica: Can you believe it? I finally get to run my own kitchen!
Cassie: (hugs him) Its been so long! Last time I saw you, you were setting up your tent in line to see Return of the Jedi.
Conan: You could actually see him trying not to fall down.
Phoebe: It really does how long do you think we have to stay?
Rachel: Oh no, yes I do! I do! I mean, come on go on, you were, you were saying I am happier when uh, yknow?
Chandler: Sure. (to Phoebe) You don't really handcuff guys to waterpipes do you?
Chandler: Oh, yes. I decided to leave these out for you in case Richard stops by and you wanna engage on a little light bondage and moustache play!
Joey: Well sure, you name a kid that, what do you expect them to grow up to be?
MONICA: Alright, but I'm very excited about this OK, so you gotta promise you won't get all big-brothery and judgmental.
Chandler: See Joe, not that thats not grrreat! But, one of the cool things about having somebody we know perform the ceremony is that it can be about us! Yknow, it can be more personal. You can tell stories about us!
Rachel: No, Ive just always wanted to do that. Can you help me clean this up?
Rachel: (in disbelief) You WHAT? And I missed it? Because I was giving a makeover to that stupid hippie?
Chandler: I majored in lightning rounds. All right, were gonna destroy you.
Monica: Went down to the docks. Bet ya didn't know you could get it wholesale.
Monica: Rachel, what's going on? I mean isn't this the same Barry who you left at the altar?
Monica: Did you eat all the neighbor candy?!
ERICA: I should just be happy to be near you.
Joey: Hey, Chan, can you help me out here? I promise I'll pay you back.
Rachel: (on the phone) Monica, Im quitting! I just helped an 81 year old woman put on a thong and she didnt even buy it! (Pause) Im telling you Im quitting! Thats it! Im talking to my boss right now! (Pause) Yes I am! (Pause) Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Okay bye, call me when you get this message. (Hangs up.)
Monica: See there you go. Woo! We're out of the woods. Okay, I'll get dressed now.
JOEY: Oh, now you're tellin' us how you feel.
Joey: You sure? Some extra crispy? Dirty rice? Beans?
Monica: Hey, cheer up! Youre gonna see her again, right?
Phoebe: So, what should you have done?
Mrs. Green: Sweetheart I know youre gonna be terrific mom, I just think you need a little help, especially at the beginning.
PHOEBE: Oh no, you're not supposed to be here. This is the staging area, you should, it's all wrong, you should leave, ya know, get out. [opens the door, the guys are right there] Or perhaps you'd like a creme d'menthe.
Aurora: (gets up to leave) Well, call me if you change your mind.
Rachel: You have not worn that T-shirt since you were 15!! It doesnt even fit you anymore!
Phoebe: Okay, look you wanna hold onto your food? You gotta scare people off. I learned that living on the street.
Rachel: Oh my God, I cannot believe this. You know I actually came in here hoping to have a mature conversation with youAbout us! But I can�t do that with someone who hides my messages and brings crazy women back to my apartment!
Joanna: Sophie, get in here! (Sophie enters) You see! Now youre making Sophie uncomfortable!
Ross: Well, but aren't you pissed at him?! I mean this guy abandoned you! I gotta tell you if this were me, this guy would be in some serious physical danger! (Getting worked up) I mean I-I-I'd walk in there and I'd be like, "Yo, dad! You and me outside right now!" (Calming down.) I kinda scared myself.
Ursula: Yeah, um, I was over there, then you said, "Excuse me, hello Miss," so now Im here.
Joey: (looks at him suspiciously) But, ehm... you watched the tape?
Ross: How do you think it's gonna look when you get her something incredibly meaningful and expensive and her boyfriend Joey gives her an orange?
Rachel: Uh well, I guess Im not gonna miss the fact that youre never allowed to move the phone pen. (Laughs. Monica lags behind the laugh a little bit.)
Ross: So what're you saying here? I should shave again, pick up some wine, what?
Joey: Wow! You realize that we've been throwing this ball, without dropping it, for like an hour?
Mackenzie: (at the other end of the line) I don't know... You know what? I'm gonna put you on with my bear. Hold on. (she puts the phone at the bears ear)
Rachel: Wh, Ross what do you want from me? You want me, you want me to quit my job so you can feel like you have a girlfriend?
PHOEBE: Ok, look, before you even start, I'm not denying evolution, ok, I'm just saying that it's one of the possibilities.
Joey: (still very puzzled) Oh, yeah... of course... yeah... it's a stuffed animal... you know... it's for kids... not for adults... I know that!
Rachel: Oh sure Ross, yeah. If I have a heart attack in a restaurant, I want you there with your fossil brush.
Monica: Oh absolutely. I like it even more on you than I did on Colonel Sanders. (Ross starts to leave) Ross! Ross! Im kidding!
Phoebe: Yeah. Well, we called everyone in your phone book and bunch of people came, but it took us so long to get you here that they-they had to leave.
Monica: Well, because you signed it baby kangaroo Tribbiani (Joey makes a 'and-what’s-wrong-with-that' look). Hey, why don’t you stop worrying about sounding smart and just be yourself!
Rachel: Just so you know... With us... it's never off the table. (she enters her room and closes the door.)
Frank: Well y'know about the tongue thing, y'know, and how I told you about my likes and my dislikes...
RACHEL: Yeah, Joey honey, I don't know if this'll mean anything to you but you'll always be pre-approved with us.
PHOEBE: Eight dollars and 27 cents. But not really, 'cause I put in the first two, just to, you know, get the ball rolling, and to make myself feel better.
Ross: Wha... (gasps) What? What would give you that idea?
MONICA: I'm at work, ordinary day, you know, chop chop chop, sauti, sauti, sauti. All of a sudden, Leon, the manager, calls me into his office. It turns out they fired the head lunch chef, and guess who got the job.
Rachel: (entering) Hey! Ross and I were looking for you! What are we all doing in here? (Looks at Chandler) Oh, my! (Covers the spot where Joey wants bubbles to be replaced.)
Phoebe: Ohh, okay, they gave you the old time pricing.
Chandler: Guys thank you very much but neither of you is marrying us.
Chandler: Now you do that, youre on TV.
Ross: Joey, you are gonna love this guy. Gandolf is like the party wizard!
Chandler: Are you just tired now or are you always tired, 'cause that could be a sign of clinical depression.
Ross: I know what you mean, Ive always wondered how different my life would be if-if Id never gotten divorced.
Mischa: Hes says, Walking with you makes this strange city, feel like home.
Ross: Damn, I forgot you were here.
(Joey is now looking at Rachel, and since Rachels standing and hes sitting down and hes not looking at her face You get the picture.)
Ross: Oh, well you see how it works is, the part with Dick Clark in Times Square is actually live, but they tape some of the party stuff ahead of time. Yeah, not a lot of people know that.
Rachel: Oh my God! I bet thats him. My digital fairy tale is about to begin. I wonder how I should be? Should I be uh (In a sexy voice) Hello? Or should I be (Happily) Hi! Its Rach (Phoebe knocks the phone out of Rachels hand, catches it, and answers it.) Would you stop doing that?!
Joey: All right! Ill try! But if I cant, you can stay with Chandler and I until you get settled.
Phoebe: Okay, you know where you are better than I do. I was just curious.
Rachel: Yeah, I have to tell Ross that I love him. Now honey, you take care, you dont have those babies until I get back. (Kisses her stomach.)
Phoebe: Hey listen let me ask you, do you believe in soul mates?
Ross: Well, ahem... you know, by the time we'd finished with all the dirty talk, it was kinda late... and we were both kind of exhausted, so uh...
Chandler: You look amazing. I'm the luckiest man in the world.
ESTL: Stop saying you're not talented, you're very talented. It's just with the bird dead and all, there's very little act left. Oh, honey, give me a break, will ya? [a knock on the door] Oooh, ooh, I'll talk to you later.