words in movies
Joey: So you need someone who knows fashion, to tell you what looks good.
Joey: Maybe you could take Charlie shopping.
Charlie: I'm sure you have better things to do.
Joey: Are you kidding? Rachel loves to shop! And she has great taste! Yeah, she's the one who taught me, you don't wear white after labour day and that you always, always, always have to put on underwear when you're trying on clothes.
Charlie: If you have the time, I'd really appreciate the help.
Phoebe: Oh... Mike's sister just invited me to a party tonight, he's gonna be there. And she was like "Oh, don't worry! I asked him. He's totally ok with seeing you!". So now I have to go so he'll think that I'm totally ok with seeing him!
Rachel: Hey Pheebs, I'm-I'm taking Charlie shopping, why don't you come and I'll help you find something.
Joey: Oh, ain't that nice? The three of you trying on slutty lingerie together.
Joey: Why would you ruin it, who was that hurtin'?
Chandler: Oh, I can't believe my sperm have low motility because, let me tell you, when I was growing up they sure seem to be in a hurry to get places!!
Doctor Connelly: I'm sorry there wasn't better news from your test last week but I wanted to talk to you about your options.
Doctor Connelly: Above all, even though your chances of conceiving through natural means aren't great, you never know! So, keep having sex on a regular basis.
Doctor Connelly: And, of course, if you feel that neither of those is right for you, you can always adopt.
Chandler: Is that a hint? Because we love you Doctor Connelly but we don't think we'd want you to be our child! (Dr. Connelly glares at him) Wow, talking about an inhospitable environment!
Ross: (entering) Hey, you guys!
Ross: Yeah, right! What was last time he met a submission deadline for an abstract (he and Charlie laugh, then Joey starts laughing too without any reason) Well, why are you laughing?
Ross: Wait a minute, you guys. Oh, I wanna ask you something. I-I I may get to speak at this paleontology convention and if I do, I'd love for you guys to come and hear me.
Chandler: But you come first!
Charlie: We'll see you, guys! (she goes)
Chandler: Not as much fun as last time. Apparently you only get porn if you're giving a sperm sample.
Joey: Enough said, I'm there for you man. Where is she, upstairs?
Ross: How do you feel about all this?
Ross: (reading from a notepad) I mean, we've been accepting Leakey's dates as a given, but if they're off by even a hundred thousand years or so then you can - you can just throw most of our assumptions, you know, right in the trash. (he throws the notepad in the waste bin) So-so what I am saying is - is is that (he picks the notepad back from the waste bin) is that the repercussions could be huge! I mean, not just in palaeontology, but if-if you think about it, in evolutionary biology, uh, genetics, geology, uh, I mean, truly the mind boggles!
Ross: Oh, that's not what you want...
Charlie: (to Rachel) So, you know what, I really like those jackets with the shoulder pads on them. Where do you think those would be?
Rachel: On Melanie Griffith in "Working girl". I think what you want is over here.
Charlie: See, I told you I needed someone! Oh, you know, by the way, as a "thank you", I would really love to take you out.
Rachel: Yeah! I'm a big fan! Of the movies, you know. Motion pictures. The Talkies!
Phoebe: (picks up a dress) Hey Rach, will you come with me to a dressing room?
Charlie: Wha, you know, maybe we can do something else!
Rachel: You know that depends on what it is! I've done a lot of stuff.
Phoebe: So what were you doing out there, do you not like Charlie?
Rachel: I don't know, you know, just the way she waltzed in here all smart, and tall! You know, and just swept Joey off his feet... I mean, nobody else has a chance!
Rachel: Anybody! You, me, you know, Monica's mom...
Phoebe: You like Joey?
Phoebe: Uh, wow! Isn't it ironic that he liked you and now you like him?
Phoebe: Oh well, as long as it is under control, you know, you can't do anything about it, he's already dating her, and she is a nice person, that wouldn't be right.
Monica: Oh, of course, it's so nice to see you again, Zack!
Zack: (shaking Monica's hand) You too.
Chandler: You guys haven't actually met before, but, boy! You're both polite! (pause) Go to have a seat Zack, and I'll get you a beer.
Chandler: So, how would you like to have a baby that's half yours and half his!
Monica: Chandler, this is crazy! What did you even say to him! "Come up, meet my wife! Give us your sperm"!
Chandler: No, I invited him to dinner so you could get a chance to get to know him! I mean, if we go through a sperm bank you never meet the guy, get to check him out.
Chandler: I'm telling you, he's great! I mean, even if my sperm worked fine, I'd think he'd be the way to go!
Monica: I'm not going to be a part of this! You can't just bring some random guy at home and expect him to be our sperm donor!
Zack: Thanks! Do you have a coaster? I don't wanna make a ring.
Rachel: Oh, God, do you think she heard? It would be so bad if she heard!
Phoebe: Well, maybe she didn't hear! Ok I'm gonna go into that dressing room, you stay in here and I'll talk and see if you can hear me.
Rachel: (yelling at the stranger) Alright! Enough out of you!
Joey: Fine, I'll rent a car and drive...! Ross, you have to get that job!
Chandler: So what do you think? I want that guys genes for my kid! Those eyes, those cheeckbones!
Chandler: You don't like him.
Zack: You guys have such a great place here.
Chandler: Oh! Thanks, I'm crazy about our place. Hey! speaking of crazy... do you have a history of mental illness in the family?
Zack: (looking very puzzled) Okaaay... so eh... so tell me, how did you guys meet.
Monica: Oh, friends first, drunk in London, you know the story. I've got a better question for you: Do you or any of your blood relatives have diabetes?
Zack: You guys don't have people for dinner a lot, huh?
Chandler: You know what's not funny? Male Pattern Baldness (Monica stretches her neck to look behind Zack's head and then gives Chandler an "ok" sign)
Zack: Ok listen, you guys have shown a lot of interest in me tonight and I'm flattered and... and quite frankly a little frightened. Can we just talk about something else?
Chandler: I noticed you were enjoying that Ravioli with a beautiful set of teeth. Did you have braces as a child?
Rachel: Ok. (Phoebe starts to walk in the opposite direction though. Rachel sees and follows her) Wha...? where? Where are you going?
Rachel: (to Charlie) Hey, hi! Hey, where've you been?
Charlie: (smiling) Rachel... I heard you guys whispering.
Rachel: Oh God. You did. You heard. Ok, listen, let me explain.
Charlie: No! There's nothing to explain. I heard you. Phoebe likes Joey.
Rachel: Yeah! That's Phoebe. That's Phoebe. You know, she just wants them all! It's like she's a nympho!
Charlie: You know, by the way. I heard you tell her not to do anything. Thanks for sticking up for me. You are such a nice person.
Ross: (To the still half asleep Professor) Oh my God! You really want me to be the keynote speaker? Thank you! (hugs him whilst still on his lap)
Joey: (impressed) Wow! You look... (drops the cookie)... stop-eating hot! Which is like the highest level of hotness!
Phoebe: Are you sure? Because I'm really dreading going to this party.
Joey: Alright, then you go to that party and you pretend to be over Mike. And afterward you come to my place and I'll get you good and drunk!
Phoebe: You got it! Ok. But not on the wine that you made, ok, because I just don't want to go back to the Emergency Room.
David: Wow, you look unbelievable.
Phoebe: Yeah. What-what are you doing here?
Phoebe: Well, it's great that you're back! How are you?
Phoebe: (disappointed) Oh, good for you.
David: She's also a scientist, so she's very smart and pretty and... well, it's actually because of you, really, that we're together, I mean, I saw what you had with that Mike guy, and I just said "Boy, I want that".
David: Yeah, I know. Well... this is probably a stupid question, seeing that you look like that, but do you have some place that you need to be right now?
David: Do you wanna get a drink?
David: Do you smell beets?
Zack: I'm gonna take off now. You're gonna let me go home, aren't you?
Chandler: You sure you don't wanna stick around a little longer?
Chandler: Are you just tired now or are you always tired, 'cause that could be a sign of clinical depression.
Zack: No it's just tiring having to figure out the age at which all my grandparents died. I'll see you tomorrow.
Chandler: Yeah, you think so, well? Should I ask him?
Chandler: Why not, just because his great-grandmother was obese, our kids are gonna get that from you anyway!
Monica: No, that's not it. It's just that when we were asking him all those questions before, I just... I just realized I don't care if he's the most perfect guy in the world... he's not you.
Monica: No, he's not. And if I can't get pregnant with you, then I don't want to get pregnant by... him or anyone else.
Chandler: Really? Are you sure?
Chandler: (sighs with relief) Thank God, because I don't wanna do this either. You know, I was just doing because I thought that was what you wanted to do. You know, I'm the husband, I'm supposed to... bring the sperm.
Monica: That is so sweet. I love you. (they kiss)
Chandler: So you know this leaves us with...
Chandler: How do you feel about that?
Chandler: Me too. I wanna find a baby that needs a home and I wanna raise it with you. And I wanna mess it up in our own specific way.
Chandler: Look, I just wanted to apologize for last night. I got the feeling we made you a little uncomfortable.
Zack: No you didn't.
Zack: No you did.
Chandler: My wife and I have some boundary issues, you know, sometimes we ask inappropriate questions. We're working on it.
Zack: Oh, thank you.
Chandler: You wouldn't know if Jeanette's planning on keeping her baby, would ya?
Phoebe: Not even if you just pretend that it's milk?
Rachel: You can?
Rachel: Wow! Have you ever rescued anyone from a burning building before?
Joey: Yeah, thats what I was afraid of.. Okay, uhh Look Janine I really want you to feel at home here, but some of this new stuff. Its too girly.
Chandler: Hi. You guys have any wrapping paper?
Phoebe: (returning) Hey you guys, Hums While He Pees just asked me out!
CHANDLER: Yeah. Just let me grab my jacket and tell you I had sex today.
Rachel: Joey, youre such an amazing actor! (He smiles.) How do you know where Dr. Drake Remoray leaves off and Joey Tribbiani begins?
Chandler: I never want to leave you again!
Chandler: (to Ross) You be cool. (He opens the door and lets her in as they all turn there backs on her.)
Phoebe: Okay, how do you feel now?
PHOEBE: Well you said that he's paying the people who are playing.
Chandler: How did you? How? How?
Monica: Wow! And you got a petticure. Your feet are all dressed up.
Joey: But you can't stay with Phoebe, Ross! We're-we're roomies!
Phoebe: You know.. you let your guard down, you start to really care about someone, and I just- I- (starts chewing her hair)
Joey: Hey! Dont you hang up on me! Ill marry you and me right now! I have the power!
Phoebe: If I havent said it before: shes a lucky, lucky lady! So, where are you going towhat the mother of crap is up with this stuff? (Referring to the taffy, which shes been chewing this whole time.) Oh, God. Is it gum, is it food? Whats the deal? (she swallows it, finally) Oh, its nice! May I try a pink one?
Joey: Wait, well, where did you get it from?!
Mike: Sure (looks confused) who are you?
Joey: What? You ordered pizza without me?!
Monica: Youll see.
Joey: Over there! (Points to the couch) Before, with the bills! You tried to give some charity, I said "No," you dropped it. Okay? Then we had a nice last night together, we had some fun, we gambled, nobody tried to give anybody any money! Now out of the blue, you start with the charity thing again!
Chandler: Oh we did, and you still have all your lamps.
Rachel: Yes, they will! You know what you should do? Just go take a walk, all right? I know your size and I’m... I’m gonna pick up some really good stuff for you.
Rachel: Do you remember where the duck food is?
Phoebe: Uhm... You know, once we're in the air and the captain turns off the seatbelt sign... you feel free to roam about my cabin...
PHOEBE: You wanna try it again?
Joey: You have Knicks tickets?
Joey: No youre not! Not to me!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang, except Joey, is there. Phoebe is, well you y'know.]
JOEY: You see this, this is a friend.
Mrs. Geller: I'm so glad you could come Chandler, we've got plenty of food so I hope you're hungry.
Joey: Oh-oh-oh-oh, how I do it is, I look a woman up and down and say, "Hey, how you doin?"
Ross: Oh, now you want a favour?
Frank: Wait a minute, wait, this is because of you?
Monica: Hey, dont mix those up, you could really ruin that lollipop.
Rachel: How?! How do you know?
FBOB: I think you may have a drinking problem.
Monica: Yeah. Umm, Chandler can I talk to you outside for a second?
Mrs. Waltham: Lovely to meet you.
Rachel: But yknow what, if you think its gonna be okay well just work out a system. Yknow, itll be like college, Ill hang a hanger on the door and put a sign, "Come back later, Im gettin lucky." (Laughs.)
Joey: What, are you crazy? When a blind man gets his sight back, does he walk around like this? (Joey closes his eyes and walks around with arms spread.)
Rachel: Ohh, thank you, thank you, thank you.
RACHEL: This is it, isn't it? I mean, this is what my life is gonna be like. My mom there, my dad there. Thanksgiving, Christmas. She gets the house, he's in some condo my sister's gonna decorate with wicker. Oh, Chandler how did you get through this?
Phoebe: Um, yeah. Look, I mean, Im not saying shes like evil or anything. She just, you know, shes always breaking my stuff. When I was eight, and I wouldnt let her have my Judy Jetson thermos, so she threw it under the bus. And then, oh, and then there was Randy Brown, who was like... Have you ever had a boyfriend who was like your best friend?
Ross: No, no you don't understand the animal hospital is way across town he's choking I don't know what else to do.
Chandler: (into receiver)Hello? Hey Charlie, what do you know?
Joey: Oh my God! Is that why you guys had to get married?!
Joey: (to Rachel) I bet I stopped listening before you did.
Rachel: Chandler, thats not enough. I mean what if she gets you a great present, two medium presents, and a bunch of little presents? And youve just gotten her one great present? I mean thats just gonna make her feel bad. Why would you do that to her Chandler? Why? Why?
Rachel: (seeing him) Chandler, what are you doing? There is a trash can right there.
Ross: A ferry? My baby is going on a ferry? Do you have any idea how dangerous those are?!
Chloe: Thats so great for you guys!
WAITER: Well, when you do, just let me know. I'll be right over there on the edge of my seat.
Ross: Yknow, I-Iyouve done a lot of stupid stuff too! Okay?
Gunther: Jij spreekt Nederlands? Dat is te gek. Heb je familie daar? (Translation: You speak Dutch That's cool. Do you have relatives there?)
Joey: I mean, the jobs easy and the moneys good, you know? I guess Im going to be hanging out here anyway. I might as well get paid for it, right? I just feel kind of weird serving you guys.
Liam: You dont say! (We see Ross who is hopping about with the ball and spikes it in his face.)
Ross: (to Joey) It's ok, because they have to get it out of their system, okay (back to Mon and Chan), but you're going to realize, this is the only place, you wanna be.
Guy: You wouldn't return my calls, you sent back my letters....
Chandler: What do you mean?
Charlie: Oh yeah! Hey, save the cork and then we can fill the bottle with water and put it back so they don't charge you.
Joey: Right, right, right, well, she wants to go to all this cultural places and I don't know how to talk about that stuff. You gotta help me out!
Chandler: (coming out of his apartment and seeing Ross) What did you do?
Ross: Oh really? Did she tell you he plays the recorder, recites poetry and bakes Madeleines?
Chandler: You put your fist through the wall?
Chandler: Oh My God! You can do a duet of Ebony and Ivory all by yourself!
Ross: All right, all right, it's just that you left a red sock in with all your whites, and now, everything's kinda pink.
Chandler: Yes, yes I did, but what I didn't say was what I was about to say, what I wanted to say was, uh... would you like to go out with me sometime, thankyou, goodnight. (He walks back to the others but she calls him back.)
Monica: Thats right. (A noise comes from the living room.) Did you hear something?
Monica: Guys, could you please just stop throwing the ball for one minute and just help me find it!
Monica: (To Chandler) Look honey, you dont have to do this, okay? Its the strength you have inside that means the most to me. Youre loyal, youre honest, and you have integrity! Thats the kind of strength that I want in the man that I love!
Monica: I knew you were not okay with that.
Chandler: Yeah you are!!
PHOEBE: I, I don't know what to say. I mean, you know, you're married to someone for six years and you think you know him and then one day says, 'Oh, I'm not gay.'
Chandler: You are an amazing wife. (Monica shrugs) No really you're amazing you were actually gonna do this for me, I mean where do you find the strength and understanding over something like that.
Monica: Yep, yep...You?
Phoebe: Yuh-huh! I was the last one to know when Chandler got bitten by the peacock at the zoo. I was the last one to know when you had a crush on Joey when he was moving in. (Monica gestures at Phoebe to shut up; Joey looks surprised but pleased) Looks like I was second to last.
Ross: Exactly. So you didnt, didnt mention anything to Issac right?
Erica: Thank you. It's really nice to meet you guys, I can't believe I'm here!
Chandler: (to Ross) Maybe you do that next time you get married!
Ross: Rachel says sharing's great and supposedly, you know, we outta be doing it. Do you wanna?
Monica: Im gonna go tell Joey that (laughs) that youre back. I was really worried about you. (Exits.)
Phoebe: Yeah. Its just, you know, its this whole stupid Ursula thing, its...
Danielle: Well, I've been calling you, but it turns out I had your number wrong. And when I finally got the right one from Information, there was no answer. So I thought I'd just come down here, and make sure you were okay.
Ross: But I'm not! (pause). You know what if you're in the mood for Thai food...
MONICA: So what, he's a little older, big deal, I mean he's important to me. Ya know if you ask him, he might take you on his Jag. [walks off]
Joey: These new kids, they never last. Sooner or later, they all...stop lastin'. Listen, uh, what do you say I buy you that cup of coffee now?
Rachel: (crying) No. I cant, youre a totally different person to me now. I used to think of you as somebody that would never, ever hurt me, ever. God, and now I just cant stop picturing with her, I cant, (Ross stands up and backs away) it doesnt matter what you say, or what you do, Ross. Its just changed, everything. Forever.
Phoebe: (singing) Love is sweet as summer showers, love is a wondrous work of art, but your love oh your love, your love...is like a giant pigeon...crapping on my heart. La-la-la-la-la- (some guy gives her some change and to that guy) Thank you. (sings) La-la-la-la...ohhh!
Monica: Y'know what, you can play with my dollhouse.
Ross: You know what, I think weve had all the bad luck were going to have. (He hugs her.)
Young Ethan: Well, if that's what you kids are calling it these days then, yes I am. I uh, I've kinda been waiting for the right person.
Ross: Well youre gonna be a wonderful grandma. (They hug.)
Tour Guide: You mean Dr. Geller?
Chandler: (entering from the bedroom wearing a big, pink bunny costume) Monica! Can I talk to you for a second? Listen, I appreciate you getting me the costume
Dana: Absolutely! But you-you would really feel better about me rejecting you if your actor friend can audition for my movie?
Joey: No, was my best friend. Anyway, I dont know why youre pushing for him so hard. With him out of the way as my best friend, theres a spot open.
Phoebe: Did you stop Rachel?