words in movies
Rachel: Oh, Phoebe, are you still on hold? I was supposed to call my Dad back like two hours ago.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, he clipped on, he said call him as soon as you get a chance, hes at Flimbys.
Joey: Two it is. Ross, how about you?
Joey: But you said one.
Joey: Okay. (to Phoebe and Chandler) Did ah, you guys mean you plus one?
Ross: All right, Ill see you tonight.
Joey: Oh, hey, you guys are finally gonna get to meet Kate!
Monica: Joey, what are you doing?! Its never gonna happen, shes seeing somebody.
Monica: (to Phoebe) Here you go. You can wear this. (hands her a sweater)
Monica: Okay, wait, you gotta hang up cause were gonna be late.
Hold Voice: Thank you for your patience, youre the next caller.
Phoebe: Yes!! Yes!! Im the next caller! You were gonna have me hang up.
Chandler: (entering, carrying the chick and duck) Hey! Can you take a duck and a chick to the theatre?
Rachel: How are you? (She goes to kiss him on the cheek, but stops because of the dates and pats him on the shoulder.)
Cailin: Ill join you.
Ross: Oh! Well then this is awkward. So what do you uh
Ross: Okay. (sees two people sitting in their seats.) Uh, huh. Excuse me, Im sorry, I-I think you may be in our seats.
Tommy: Oh, you thought, huh? Yeah, well that didnt really work out too well for you did it you idiot!! What are you?! A moron!! Huh?! It says D-13! Okay?! Look youre surrounded by even numbers!! Did that give you some clue?!
Tommy: Oh! Oh! The usher must be right! What, with all that training they go through! Get out!! (They start to leave.) Here! (He throws him back his ticket.) (to Ross, calmly) Hey man, you want the aisle?
Joey: (sees Kate) Oh-oh, hey-hey, Kate! Listen I want you to meet everybody. Everybody, this is Kate.
Chandler: So thats the girl you like.
Ross: (drags Chandler over to buffet table) Im telling you, this guy Rachel is with is crazy! Okay? He viscously screamed at total strangers! I think hes baaad news!
Chandler: Wait a minute, wait a minute, you dont like the guy Rachels dating? Well, thats odd.
Joey: Oh, hey, Lauren. Uh, you guys this is, this is Kates understudy, Lauren.
Rachel: Hey. Gosh, you look soo familiar.
Lauren: Oh, yeah! I-I ran into you in the hallway in your building. It was right after I slept with Joey. He dumped me the next day.
Cailin: So. Howd you guys meet?
Estelle: Joey, sweetheart, you were fabulous!
Joey: Hey you guys, this is my agent, Estelle.
Estelle: How do you do. (to Rachel and Monica) Ooh, you two girls were outstanding! (to Joey) Did they have representation?
The Director: Kate Millers awkward and mannered portrayal is laughable. (Kate walks away depressed.) Badda-badda-badda. Ah-ha! Here it is! The direction by Marshal Talmant is (stops, reads it again, and throws down the paper in disgust) Thank you, boys and girls, youve ruined my life. Please, stuff your talentless faces with my Mothers crab cakes! (starts to leave) Excuse me!!
Monica: Yeah. Where were you?
Hold Voice: Thank you for your patience, youre the next caller.
Monica: You were the next caller five hours ago. You must be going crazy.
Joey: Hey! Are you okay?
Joey: Listen, drama critics theyre nothing but, but people who couldnt make it as actors. You know what you should do?
Joey: Uh, de-clawing cats. Hey, tell ya what. Let me walk you home. Well stop by every news stand and burn every copy of their Times and the Post.
Joey: Oh, you didnt see the Post?
Kate: No. You?
Kate: (drunk) So you really think those newspapers are just jealous of me?
Joey: Oh, absolutely! Youre talented and youre good looking.
Kate: Oh, youre sweet and cute.
Joey: I, I dont get you. I mean first, you hate me. Then you sleep with me. Then you want nothing to do with me, now you want me again.
Kate: What? So you never went out with an actress before?
Joey: Kate, do you even like me?
Joey: Well so, how come you blew me off? Y'know? How come you were with him?
Kate: I dont know! I just, just do this! I-I always have to pick the like the smartest guy, or-or the most talented guy Why cant I just pick someone like you?
Kate: You know what I mean. I mean like the sweetest guy. Joey, youre just so, youre so, so (She passes out and slumps against his shoulder.)
Joey: (Checks to see if shes drooling on his shirt.) Okay. Okay, okay, hey. (Lays her down and covers her with a blanket.) There we go, lets get your feet up there. (Looks at her) Good night, Kate. Sweet dreams. (Picks up a garbage can) Im gonna put this can right here in case you have to hurl.
Hold Voice: Please stay on the line. Youre call is very important to us.
Monica: (entering from her bedroom) Pheebs, youve been up for 24 hours! Go to sleep, honey. Th-this isnt healthy.
Monica: Hey! Didnt you have that outfit on last night?
Phoebe: Im so, so, so sorry, Joey. I definitely am gonna see youre play. I swear youre play is very important to us, thank you for your patience. Youre play is the next play is the next play Im gonna see.
Monica: Joey, you had the night!
Monica: Did you like learn about her family?
Gunther: Sorry. She thought you were somebody else.
Ross: Look. Look, I wasnt going to say anything to you, but... All right, I dont think you should be seeing Tommy anymore.
Rachel: You dont?!
Ross: No! The guy is mean. I mean really mean. I think you should stay away from him.
Ross: Okay, fine, fine. You dont want to believe me? No, thats fine. (starts to leave)
Ross: You dont want to believe me, Im Mr. Funny to you. Mr. Funny (turns around and almost spills his coffee on Tommy)
Tommy: Hot coffee!!! You idiot!! You were gonna spill hot coffee all over me, huh?!! What are you just some big, dumb, stupid, doofy idiot, with a doofy idiot hairdo, huh?! Huh?!
Stage Manager: Look, we held the curtain for you buddy. Come on, lets go! Lets go!
Lauren: (answering the door) Vic! Where have you been, baby?!
Lauren: Ive been waiting up all night for ya. Where have you been? (Joey doesnt answer) Where have you been? Vic?!
Joey: Oh, ahh, go to the window. Im wanna run down to the truck and show you something.
Lauren: (at the window, shes looking down out of the window) What do you got down there, Vic? What do you got under that tarp?
Lauren: (whispering) Tonight. What are you doing?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler and Ross are in the kitchen, Rachel and Monica are sitting in the living room, and Phoebe is, you guessed it, still on hold.]
Chandler: Why dont you use ours across the hall, cause she has problems.
Ross: (coming out of the kitchen with a cup of coffee, almost running into Tommy) Oh-ho, whoa! Sorry, Tommy. I almost spilled this hot coffee on you.
Tommy: Yeah, but you didnt.
Rachel: Ross, would you just stop it! Its getting really old.
Phoebe: I do, I believe you.
Ross: You do Pheebs?
Tommy: (noticing the chick) Ooh, hey! Hey, there little fella. (picks up the chick) Mr. Fuzzy-Man, how are you doing? (starts to pet him) Aww. (The chick poops on his hand.) Eww! Oh! Eww! Gross! Idiot!! Stupid little, fuzzy, yellow creature!! Oh look at me, Im so cute, Im a little chick whos disgusting! God, youre so stupid, how are you not yet extinct!! (the duck wattles behind him and quacks) (to the duck) Quack-quack, quack-quack!! What are you quacking about?! Dumb Donald Doo-Doo!!
Tommy: Ooh, sorry little Mr. Chic-A-Dee, sorry you went doody in my hand! (starts to walk out and stops) (to Rachel) Well, I guess were not going out anymore. Whaa!!!
Kate: Im soo glad I caught you, I couldnt find you before.
Kate: Last night was wonderful. But I-I cant stay here just for you.
Joey: Well can you at least stay to the end of the play? I mean, Ill go to the airport with ya, I-I wanna say good bye.
Lauren: (yelling from onstage) Where are you Vic?
Joey: Yeah, I guess it is. (sees Kate is watching, he turns Lauren so that he can talk directly to Kate, but still look like he is talking to Lauren) Listen, I ah, I gotta say good bye, and-and I gotta say it quick cause this is killing me. One thing you gotta know, is that I will never forget you. But, youve got things you have to do now, and so do I. And so Im gonna get on this spaceship, (smoke starts pouring in from the ceiling, and a ladder comes down, with flashing, colored lights on the side of it) and Im gonna go to Blargon 7 in search of alternative fuels. But when I return, 200 years from now, youll be long gone. But I wont have aged at all. (gets on the ladder) So you tell your great-great-granddaughter to look me up, because Adrienne, baby, Im gonna want to meet her.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang, except Joey, is there. Phoebe is, well you y'know.]
Phoebe: Sorry, Im so sorry, I will pay you back.
Phoebe: Well, I think I broke it. But thats all right, heres the number you can call.
Chandler: Uhh, youve had a lot of sex right?
Rachel: (stopping him) Oh no-no, no-no, they dont want you to put your hands in the pockets until you are out of the store.
Rachel: I just want you to know.. Last night.. I'll never forget it.
Chandler: You know, I don't mean to brag, but I waited tables at Innsbruck in '76. (dead silence) Amouz-bouche? (holds out tray)
Ross: She brought them up! (pause) I didn't realize you were coming back so soon!
Joey: You kissed my girlfriend!
Chandler: All right look, I think its time for you to settle down. Y'know? Make a choice, pick a lane.
Machine: You have three new messages.
Joey: No, no, no, see that's why you have to do this job, agents always lie. You know, Estelle just says stuff like 'They went another way', but this, I can use this. (in a very bad Italian accent) I canna work on a new accent.
Joey: Ok whoah-hey... Let me just stop you right there, ok? First, you lied, right? Then, you lied about lying, ok? Then you lied about lying about lying, ok? So before you lie about lying about lying about lying about... lying... (loses count and begins to count the number of 'lyings' in the air but gives up.) (yelling) Stop lying!
Richard: You want me to cancel it?
Rachel: I know. Days of Our Lives, thank you very much.
Monica: Well, of course I do. What's not to like! I'll take her in a minute! But, you know, I think that you're giving up too easy, honey. I think that you need to fight for her!
Rachel: Oh, I know, I know, its-its so, its so totally like, "Whoa! Can we do this?" Yknow, I mean, but I mean it just feels right! Dont you think? It does! I mean, it just feels right, dont you think?
The Salesman: Actually, Im not buying. Im selling. Let me ask you one question. Do your friends ever have a conversation and you just nod along even though youre not really sure what theyre talking about?
EDDIE: Ah-ah-ah, you know what that is?
Rachel: yeah your both so slutty you don't even remember who you've slept with, you're made for each other.
Rachel: What? You just click when they click.
Chandler: Yeah, well, youre wrong! Okay, youre wrong.
Chandler: Ahh, Merry Christmas; I miss you guys!
Rachel: That's fine. So Monica, you are now in control of my love life.
Paul: Okay look, Ross, just so you know that since Lizzie likes you so much, Ive decided to accept the fact that youre going out with her.
Monica: You okay?
Chandler: Can you see my nipples through this shirt?
Janice: How did you know?
Rachel: Oh well then, so Im just going to go back to talking to my friend here. And you can go back to enjoying your little hamburger.
MONICA: That'll teach you to lick my muffin.
Monica: I know... it's just... I thought this was, you know... it.
Monica: ...Oh! I-I see you moved the green ottoman.
PHOEBE: Didn't you like, just get your eyes checked?
Rachel: Im fourth! (Joey is startled.) Look at you with your little maple syrup award!
Phoebe: Dont you see? Everyones looking at me! The plans working! I didnt even have to take off my top yet!
STEPHANIE: (singing) Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you?
Joey: You said number two.
Chandler: Hey, look, youre in trouble either way! Okay? If she comes back and sees me locked to this instead of the chair, shes gonna know you were in here. So you might as well just let me go.
Phoebe: (the cat runs away from her) Oooh! You are a very bad man!
Mr. Geller: 'Cause there's time to make up for that. We can do stuff together. You always wanted to go to that Colonial Williamsburg. How 'bout we do that?
Phoebe: Joey, I cant believe you would do that for me.
Rachel: All right, look. Why don't you just return the book, let Joey give her the clock pen, and you give her something worse than that. Like... a regular pen.
SUSAN: You can watch our tape if you want.
Nurse: Right! We have a semi-private labor room waiting for you. So in just a minute
Monica: (on phone) Uh, Michelle. Yeah, that was me, I-I dialed your number by mistake. (listens) Oh, you're so sweet. Yeah, we were a great couple. I know I really miss him. Well, you know how it is, it's that....
ROSS: If you wanna call that a reason.
Chandler: I dont know, y'know. What, what, would you do?
CHANDLER: How do you not fall down more?
Joey: Hey, uhh, I need to talk to you.
Ross: Thanks, Dad, really, I ju... you know, I just, I just needed to know, um... when did you start to feel like a father?
MONICA: GET OUT YOU DUFUS!!
Chandler: Nah-uh! I know you! Okay? I know the thoughts that you have in the head--in your head!
Phoebe: But he didn't really know, you know. He wasn't planning on coming to Barbados and proposing to me...
Rachel: Well then how come youre still at a job that you hate, I mean why dont you quit and get the fear?
Phoebe: You guys you really should get rid of those animals. They shouldnt be living in an apartment.
PHOE: Hey, Julie! Hey, how are you doing?
Rachel: I mean, I'll fly back and forth, they'll fly you out... Anything we want.
Phoebe: (she just looks at him) Why are you being weird?
Chandler: Are you asking permission to break the pact?
Monica: Thanks. (Joeys still patting the burn spot) I think you got it!
Phoebe: I cant!! I cant!! (She dies.) Noooooooo!!!!!!! You son of a bitch!!!!!
Monica: Oh my God! You don't know me at all!
Monica: Well, what do you think of Mike and Chandler being in a car accident?
Ross: Rach, I think youre reading a little too much into it.
Ross: Look, I'm sorry to hear about your tragedy, ok? But the swings are perfectly safe, and besides Emma loves them. You know what, you should come with us and you'll see!
Rachel: (on phone) Excuse me, Im sorry, Im gonna have to call you back, Ive got a Schemp in my office. (hangs up) (to Ross) What are you doing?
Rachel: Hey, do you believe this? Do you believe they are actually getting married?
Ross: (to Chandler) Wait-wait, so, you get to be my best man twice and I never get to be yours at all?
Tag: And if that person is already in your life, you should do something about it right?
Chandler: (slides the juice across the counter which Joey catches) What do you care? You're an actor. This is your day job. This isn't supposed to mean anything to you.
Rachel: All right! Yknow what? Thats it! You wanna do it?! Lets do it!
Monica: Because they dont know were dating. (Again, trying to quickly change subjects.) Do you think we should eat in the kitchen? (Goes to the sink and the stove to cook.)
Airline Employee: Sir! Im afraid Im gonna have to ask you to leave.
Joey: Great, you can cover Chandler.
Joey: Aw, come on! It'll be years before I forget you!
Rachel: Ooh, you guys, it starts in like 20 minutes.
Rachel: You know what, Im gonna do that, Im gonna call him up, and Im gonna ask him out. I can do that. Ask him out. (Practising) How you doin? (Calls him) Hi! Joshua? Its Rachel Green from Bloomingdales. (Listens) Yeah, umm, I was wondering if you umm, if you umm, left your wallet at the store today? Well, we found a wallet, and we(Listens) the license? Well, that is a good idea! Uh, well, lets see here this says this license belongs to a uh, uh, belongs to a mister uh, Pheebs, and umm, yeah, so sorry to bother you at home. Ill see you tomorrow. Bye. (Hangs up) (to Phoebe) Youve done that a thousand times?
Rachel: Do you wanna play football?
Chandler: (To Monica) So you came to the room looking for Joey? Did you ever in-intend on telling me about this?
Joey: Did you see the size of the closets?!
Rachel: Chandler, arent you worried about what to get Monica for Christmas?
Monica: No youre fine. (Joey checks anyway.) All right well, do you think I could take Rachel?
Phoebe: But umm, I mean, did you talk to them about, y'know
Monica: You are both idiots. The joke is not funny, and its offensive to women, and doctors, and monkeys! You shouldnt be arguing over who gets credit, you should be arguing over who gets blamed for inflicting this horrible joke upon the world! Now let it go! The joke sucks!
Joey: Thank you.
Phoebe: All right, so what were you thinking?
Gary Collins: (on TV.) It looks like we have surpassed last year's pledge total! Thank you viewers! The pledge that did it was taken by one of our volunteers (He walks over to where Joey is sitting.) Oh boy! And may I say one of our sharpest dressed volunteers, (Joey stands up.) Mr. Joseph Tribbiani!
Rachel: You dont pick me! Youre stuck with me!
Joey: But you two were supposed to be together.
MONICA: You remember that video I found of mom and dad?
Chandler: Really? What do you do? You just sit in there stewing in your own filth.
Rachel: (coming over to Ross, who is just getting up) Are you okay?
MR. TREEGER: Uhh, you said there was a party.
Monica: Well, you broke up with Julie Grath! How much weight could she have gained?
Ross: You, you go long.
JOEY: I don't know, you see somethin', you hear a word, I thought that's what it was. Let me see it again.
Chandler: Oh, so thats this is gonna work now? Youre just gonna order me around all the time?
Joey: I know, but Im a neurologist. And just to be on the safe side, Dr. Wells wanted a more comprehensive overview of you status so he sent me.
Monica: Awww, just like you always wanted. Congratulations
Rachel: (entering) Chandler!! You have the best taste in men!
Joey: (entering) Hey, Chandler, you got a minute? I-I really need to talk to you.
Mrs. Bing: Chandler darling! Look, my date has finally arrived. Id like you to meet Dennis Phillips.
Ross: Look, look, theres got to be a way we can work past this. Okay, (takes a hold of one of her arms.) I cant imagine, I cant imagine my life without you. (Both of them are starting to cry.) Without, without these arms, and your face, and this heart. Your good heart Rach, (drops to his knees and hugs her around her waist) and, and....