words in movies
Rachel: And your horoscope says, "On the fifth a special someone is going to give you a gift."
Chandler: (To Monica) Oh, well thank you in advance. (Kisses her.)
Monica: (To Chandler) You are going to make a joke about my special present! Why would you do that?!
Chandler: Oh thats right. Its your first day! So are you psyched to fight fake crime with your robot sidekick?
Phoebe: No! Joey, youre going to be great!
Joey: But I got to act with a robot Pheebs, and-and I dont know anything about technology! I cant even use Chandlers computer except to find porn! And-and thats only cause its right there when you turn it on!
Chandler: Are you judging them by their covers? Because youre really not supposed to do that.
Phoebe: Well, if you must know I have written 14 books. And as I am the only one who has read them, I can tell you that they all have been very well received.
Ross: What are you guys doing later?
Chandler: Wait a minute, hold the phone! Youre not Elizabeths dad?!
Ross: Come on guys, I-I really want this guy to like me. It-it would really help me out if you guys were here to make me look good.
The Producer: (checking his watch) Lets get you into wardrobe for a fitting.
Joey: (slaps Wayne on his cheek) How do you do there, Wayne? (Backs away.)
The Producer: Ill let you two guys get acquainted, huh? (Walks away.)
C.H.E.E.S.E.: (Wayne with a computerized voice) Nice to meet you Mac!
Joey: Well, I-I just, I just it was going to be like a really cool robot, yknow? Like the terminator or uh, when I first saw you.
Ross: It-its great to meet you Paul.
Paul: Why cant you get a girlfriend your own age?
Paul: I dont like you going out with my daughter Ross.
Ross: Okay. I can, I can see that. Umm, but I think if you give me umm, one chance I can, I can change your mind.
Paul: Okay. Ill give you one chance to change my mind. (Ross laughs in relief) You got one minute. (Ross suddenly gets worried.)
Ross: This isyou(Ross starts laughing.)
Ross: Okay, umm I want you to know that I have never done anything like this before. I mean, I mean Ive been in um, relationships in general, uh but I have never done it with a studentI mean I notnot it! I mean, I mean I dontWe havent done it. Uh, I mean, I mean, weve-weve-weve done stuff. (Paul is not amused.) Okay, okay, a joke, a jokelighten the mood. Umm, two guys go into a bar. One of them is Irish.
Monica: How crazy that wed run into you!
Ross: Oh God, thank you! (Runs and gives all of them a group hug.) Umm, uh, Mr. Stevens Id like you to meet my friends uh, this is Phoebe, Monica, and Chandler.
Phoebe: Youre Elizabeths father, huh? I can see now where she gets her rugged handsomeness.
Ross: Okay umm, why dont we all take a seat, yknow? And uh, and Ill get us all some uh some coffees(He goes to pull out Elizabeths chair, but Paul steps in)Yeah, why dont you. (Paul pulls out her chair) Uh and you guys can talk about whatever, whatever you want. Yknow? Whatever pops into your head. (He turns his back to Paul and Elizabeth and points to himself for Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe. Then he goes to order the coffee.)
Paul: Oh, you dont have to do that every time.
Chandler: But uh Ross, Ross is a great guy! I was roommates with him in college. Uh, funny story (He starts laughing then notices that Paul isnt happy.) Youre roommate in college died didnt he?
Ross: (returning with the coffee) Okay here we are Paul, Elizabeth. (He sets down their cups.) So I hope you guys were finding something to talk about.
Rachel: Hi, Im sorry Im late but I am ready, ready to talk you up! When does Lizs father get here?
Chandler: Hey honey, you got the kind with the little girl, you said we were gonna to get the kind with the baby.
Monica: No, you said the baby creeps you out.
Monica: You said the baby.
Monica: Why would the little girl creep you out?
Phoebe: (writing frantically) You guys, Im sorry, could you please talk a little slower?
Phoebe: And how none of it matters when the people really love each other. (Chandler and Monica kiss.) And how people will believe anything you tell them as long as its a compliment.
Rachel: Paul. Umm, I just wanted you to know that Ross really is a great guy.
Paul: Well maybe you can date him then that would save me the trouble of killing him. (Rachel laughs then starts looking at him.) Are you okay?
Rachel: You just dont look old enough to have a twenty-year-old daughter.
Rachel: Oh no! Yes! Of course, I know that! I justI meant yknow are you still a We or are you just You?
Rachel: (sympathetic) Ohh. So you raised her all on your own?
Phoebe: Well, why dont you just get him fired?
Rachel: I was just getting him to like you.
Rachel: Ross, its okay. You can come out.
Ross: (coming out of the bedroom) Oh! Oh my God! I didnt even see you!
Paul: Sure you did! You came in, you got all awkward, and you ran into the bedroom. You were shouting, "Joey! Joey!" Bye Rach. (Kisses her.)
Paul: Ill call you later. Bye Ross. (Leaves)
Ross: You were at the coffeehouse!
Rachel: WhYou dated my sister!
Rachel: Ross look, look this is good for you. Okay? Lets face it, so far the guys not lovin ya! But I can turn that around! I got the inside track! We can all go out to dinner, yknow? And I can talk you up! Ross, the guy is a very, very successful lawyer!
Monica: Well yknow Joey, youre a pretty charming guy.
Monica: No sweetie, youve got to win over the guy that controls C.H.E.E.S.E.! Youve got to kiss some serious robot ass!
Joey: Thats not a bad idea. Yeah. Okay, but if I got to turn on the charm tomorrow Im not wasting anymore of it over here with you guys. (Starts to leave, but stops and turns to Phoebe.) Well, actually I got a little bit saved for you Pheebs. (Exits.)
Chandler: So do you think uh, Joeys more charming than me?
Chandler: Yeah, you wish. (Stops to think about it and gets depressed.)
Phoebe: (writing in her book) "You wish."
Phoebe: Im not writing about you! Im writing about other people.
Monica: Okay fine! Fine! Then you know what, Ill just write about Phyllis! Hmm!
Phoebe: I see what youre doing!
Joey: Okay! (He yanks his hand away.) All right. Umm, all right Wayne, level with me. Okay? I-I keep hearing all these rumors that I might get fired. Okay, they even have actors coming in to read for my part! Come on man, you-you got to give me a second chance! I mean, I love-I love this little guy! (He grabs C.H.E.E.S.E.s arm and pulls it off at the elbow.) Ah-ah!! (Wayne is shocked.) Okay, thats why you didnt want me to touch him right? Here you go! Okay? (Hands Wayne the arm and he goes to fix it. Meanwhile Joey starts to berate himself.) Stupid! I cant believe it! God! (A very beautiful woman walks by.) (To her) Hey, how you doin? (He and her go over to talk and Wayne looks on with envy.)
Ross: (to Paul) Just-just so you know I was a freshman and she was a senior. So it wasnt as bad as-as
Paul: Ross, look, I know Ive been giving you a lot of jabs and its partly because Im very protective of Lizzie, and partly because well, they just keep coming to me. But I have to admit that after all the wonderful things that Lizzie has told me and the many, many, (pause) many stories that Rachel has told me that, well (pause) youre not (pause) all bad.
Paul: And anyhow, Im sorry I was so harsh before, but you have to understand that I (pause) still look at Lizzie like shes a twelve-year-old girl.
Ross: Yeah. You know what? I know what you mean; I do that too.
Paul: You have a son?
Ross: Yeah, well my-my ex-wife and I share custody of Ben and umm, uh, and just so you know, Carol and I are on excellent terms as Im sure you are with your wife! (Realizes) Oh, Im sorry! (To Elizabeth) Its unbelievable!
Paul: Dont worry about it, I just didnt realize you were married. (Rachel returns and hears that.)
Ross: Youre back.
Paul: You two were married?!
Rachel: Oh! Whoops! Im sorry, you were talking about Emily!
Phoebe: I know what time you said.
Phoebe: I will tell you as soon as you thank me for writing my book.
Chandler: Thank you for writing your book. Its-its uh, great book and you are the queen of everything.
Phoebe: Thanks! So are you.
Chandler: (To Monica) I told you I should not wear this color. (Hes wearing a reddish-orange sweater.)
Chandler: So you knew we were gonna miss the movie!
Monica: Inside of telling us you decided to write in your stupid book!
Wayne: Hey Joey, I want to talk to you.
Joey: Yeah? Well, I dont want to talk to you Wayne! I hate you! You ruined my life! Oh, Chandler, Wayne. Wayne, Chandler. (They shake hands.)
Wayne: Joey, Joey, I-I-Ill g-get you your job back if you help me out.
Joey: (incredulous) Why should I help you?!
Joey: (happily) What do you need?
Wayne: I-I-I saw you on stage talking to that beautiful woman, yknow Sarah?
Joey: What are you in love with her or something?
Wayne: Listen, I-I guarantee you keep your job if you can teach me how to talk to women like you do.
Joey: Oh wow Wayne, its not really something you can teach yknow? Its pretty much something youre born with if you(Off Chandlers look)You-you can teach it! Ill show you right how to do it.
Rachel: I mean if you think about it, I mean Ross did learn something from each marriage.
Paul: Well, this is fun. So Ross, did you kill any of these wives?
Ross: Yknow what? I-I-I I-I have had enough of this! Yknow, I-I-I care a great deal about your daughter and I have treated her with nothing but respect! So if-if youve got a problem with me, frankly
Paul: Are you yelling at me?!
Elizabeth: Yknow what daddy? If you dont like Ross, thats fine. It doesnt matter to me, Im gonna go out with him anyway.
Paul: Wow. What can I say? (Pause, pointing at Ross) This doesnt make me like you any better!
Joey: Well, it turns out you were right C.H.E.E.S.E.
Joey: You got it! And the rabbis beard, 100% horsehair. Nice catch C.H.E.E.S.E.! (Pauses as he waits for C.H.E.E.S.E.s next line.) Its your line C.H.E.E.S.E.! (Suddenly C.H.E.E.S.E. goes crazy and starts flinging its arms and advancing on Joey behind the desk.) Wayne! Wayne!!
Ross: Uh-hmm, yeah-yeah do you like it? Do-do you looove it? I just want you to know that Im changing your grade back.
Ross: Hey Pheebs, maybe this whole heart attack thing is a sign, that-that you should start think about getting a different job.
Ross: Im getting that baby out of you!
Alice: None. But if there was something you wanted to tell us, were just gonna be right over there (points to the counter) having coffee.
Rachel: Op! Youre peeping!
Monica: (without looking up from what she's doing) Besides tampons and salt? (Then looks) Ooh! My God! Maple candy! That's so sweet of you. (Opens the box) That's weird...it's empty!
Ross: So, you gals wanna hand over your money now? That way, we don't have to go through the formality of actually playing.
Joey: Oooh, what you got there?
Joey: You know what, you guys? It's their first time, why don't we just forget about the money, alright?
Chandler: You must stop! (Chandler hits what he is working on with a hammer and it collapses.)
Rachel: Yeah, honey, maybe you can talk to somebody whos had a baby. Like your mom?
MONICA: Not that, this, US. Oh my God, Ross, you-re, you're, it's jus-, you-, ever sin- you been here.
Joey: Look Rach, wasnt this supposed to a temporary thing? I thought you wanted to do fashion stuff?
Mrs. Geller: Oh, thank you Chandler! I just bought it.
Phoebe: No, you can�t go. No-no-no, I can�t hold this table on my own. If they ask me to move, I cave.
Ross: Okay, I think I might know why my parents dont like you.
Chandler: You do? Why?
Rachel: Now that youre on youre own, youre free to look as stupid as you like.
Phoebe: Yknow the only reason hes marrying you is because he thinks all the things you were saying about yourself were true.
Chandler: (to Ross) Hey, so can you make it on Friday?
Phoebe: Oh, I know a way that you can decide! All right, I'm going to ask you a series of questions and you answer as quickly as you can.
Joey: All right, I'll see you in the morning.
Joey: Thats what that was?! Cause that other thing? I thought you were on to something, but it did nothing for me.
Phoebe: Hey. So, did you talk to Rachel?
Phoebe: Maybe because you never listen to anything that I say. I talk about her all the time! DENISE!!!!!
Chandler: What are you doing?
Rachel: Okay... aahhh... Please laugh for mommy... Please? Please laugh for mommy... (Rachel makes a funny face, sticking her tongue out, making a farting noise and using her hands as antlers, wiggling her fingers... No response from Emma...) Not funny huh? Oh so, is it... only offensive novelty rap? Or maybe just, you know, rap in general? 'Cause mommy can rap... (Rachel tries to rap and makes weird movements with her arms in the process.) My name is mommy and I'm here to say / that all the babies are... Oh, I can't rap... Allright sweetheart... This is only because I love you so much, and I know that you're not gonna tell anybody... (Rachel's face is telling "Oh what am I doing? The things I have to go through... and she starts to rap) I like... big butts and I cannot lie... / You other brothers can't deny... / when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face... (Emma starts to laugh) Yes! Yes! Yes! YES! Oohhhhh! Oh! (Rachel now really gets into it, and her insecure movements start getting better) I like big butts and I cannot lie... / You other brothers can't deny... Oh Emma you're laughing! Oh you are, you really do like big butts, don't you. Oh you beautiful little weirdo... (Rachel picks up Emma and Ross now enters)
David: Umm, anyway Do you want to have dinner tonight?
CHANDLER: Yes. Hey, can I ask you, is Eddie a little...
Monica: How are you still single?!
Chandler: Yknow you, really didnt have to take me to the airport.
Gary: No, it's too soon for you guys.
Rachel: Honey, why dont you sit down? Dina has something that she wants to tell you.
Ross: Pity food? Y'know what thats okay, all right, I dont need any of you to stay, okay nobody stays.
Ross: Are you kidding?
Phoebe: Tiger! (Joey moves his hand in an attempt to do the chord, in fact he does it with each name.) Dragon! Iceberg!! (He fails.) Joseph, did you even study at all last night?
Monica: You are so handsome! I wanna make love to you right here, right now! (Growls and pulls him into a kiss.)
Ross: Joey proposed to you?
Dana: Apparently Howies editing now. Yeah, he-he-he calls me up and asks me if he can edit my new movie. Can you believe that?! Yknow I-I-I havent spoken to him in like ten years and he asks me for a favor!
Ross: Oh-oh-ooh, hey guys, I was wondering if you guys would uh, maybe chip in on some new air filters for the air purifier? I mean after all, we all are using it.
Joey: Oh, okay. Phoebe, do you take this man to be your husband?
MNCA: We are talking about Rachel here. You and Rachel.
Leslie: What? Why not? You could make a ton of money.
FBOB: Hey, do you need me to pick you up?
Ross: (stopping him) Okay! Okay! Okay. Im sorry. Please, please, you were in Western Europe and?
Joey: Its just I cant because my manager said I (Gets an idea) (Starts singing) "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Annie
Chandler: Look I'm very glad that you saved Ross from the car backfire, but y'know, it could've been a bullet and you y'know, you didn't try to save me!
Mrs. Geller: It was you?
Chandler: (jumping up) Oh, Ill go out and get you some.
Phoebe: (on phone from Central Perk) Hey Joey, I just wanted to let you know that I found a selfless good deed. I just went down to the park and I let a bee sting me.
CHANDLER: It's about cutting my people a little slack, ya know, for morale. Look, if you wanna see some rough numbers, I can get them to you by Wednesday.
Rachel: Ooh... oooh... (pause) (Rachel is all bah-jiggity about Joey) oh, ah... (pause) (to Monica) Can I ask you a question?
Chandler: Thank you!
Phoebe: Cliff, do you really believe that a character from a TV show was here in your room?
Russell: I see. Have you considered therapy?
Lorraine: She's checking the coats. Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off my hands. Will you get me a white Zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice.
Monica: Im really gonna miss you.
Rachel: Oh, I know, I know, the odds are against us, but somebody has to win, and it could be us! And then how you gonna feel? You know, we're gonna be all like "oh everybody, let's take our helicopters up to the cape" and you're gonna be all like "oh, I can't guys, I'll meet you guys up there, I gotta gas up the Hyundai"
Chandler: That's good one too, Pheebs. Now all you have to do is find a planeload of people who's resolution is to plummet to their deaths.
MONICA: Ok. Oh boy. You are doin' so good. You wanna squeeze my hand? All right, Ross, don't squeeze it so hard. Honey, really, don't squeeze it so hard! Oh, Ross! Let go of my hand!
Monica: I thought you said you were going to do nothing.
Joey: Hey you guys.
Joey: Give me a number, I dont want to owe you anything!
Megan: And now youll see me buying it.
MONICA: You need one too?
Phoebe: Yep, and that's why we don't invite you to play.
Chandler: Why did you take the shower curtain down?
Monica: (Scoots towards the side of the bed.) Could you not look?
MR. TREEGER: I know. I was sweepin' yesterday. It coulda been me.ROSS: Sure, sweepin'. You never know.
Ross: Are you serious?
Monica: Look, I know that you're in a place right now where you really need to hate Julie's guts, but she didn't do anything wrong. I mean, she was just a girl who met a guy, and now they go out. I really think that if you gave her a chance, you'd like her. Would you just give that a chance, for me?
Chandler: What, what are you laughing at?
RACH: Hey, there was one Italian guy, OK, and do you even have a point?
Ross: Im asking you to do me a favor.
Ross: Did she (points at Amy) do this to her? I told you we shouldn't have left Emma with her!
Mark: Wow! Somebody wants people to know you have a boyfriend.
Ross: What. Oh no, you just rolled over the juice box.
Ross: no, no, no there's nothing wrong with you I mean you don't strike me as the type of person that wants to get married anyway.
Monica: Oh. Why didnt you take her?
Frank: Are you serious?
Chandler: Oh right, your allergies. (Monica leaves and to the chick and duck) All her, she hates you. (Chandler leaves without finishing the message for Joey.)
Joey: Its not what you said. Its the way you said it .Oh My God, Im a women!!!
Chandler: Lowell? Financial Services' Lowell, that's who you saw me with?
Monica: Wow! Youre a lot sturdier that Chandler. He crumpled like a piece of paper. So how was youre trip?
Joey: What do you mean?
Monica: If the school finds out youre fired.
PRODUCER:They're your backup singers... beind you.
Chandler: Yeah! All right! You go first.
Chandler: I just didn't want to tell you in front of them.
Chandler: Joey told you about the leg, huh?
Rachel: Joey, come on! It doesn't matter, you know, it's not like anything's gonna happen.
Joey: I know, but, I was the best, you know? I liked being the best. (He downs the glass of juice in one swig.) I don't know. Maybe I should just get outta the game. They need guys up in housewares to serve cheese.
Phoebe: What? You mean behind my back?
Janice: Hes a keeper. How are you feeling?
Chandler: Who did you originally want to hook up with?
Rachel: Oh, god, this is great! The plane is gone, so it looks like I'm stuck here with you guys.
PHOEBE: Ohh, ok, I see what you did there. Aren't you afraid though, that the writers are gonna be kinda mad when they read this?
Rachel: I guess you don't.
Phoebe: Yeah, in the back. You want a quarter?
Chandler: Well, you can understand, given how we started.