words in movies
PHOEBE: Why are you guys so upset? It's Old Yeller, it's a happy movie.
ROSS: What're you talkin' about?
RICHARD: Uh, Phoebe, I don't think your mom would want you to see what's about to happen.
MONICA: Hey, have you guys eaten, because uh, Richard and I just finished and we've got leftovers... Chicken and potatoes... What am I wearing?...Actually, nothing but rubber gloves.
CHANDLER: Well, how do you find clothes that fit?
CHANDLER: Yeah, Ross can't go so it's between my friend Eric Prower who has breath issues and Dan with the poking. [starts poking Monica in the shoulder] 'Did you see that play? Do you want some more beer? Is that Spike Lee?'
MONICA: Ok. [Richard walks in] Hey, why don't you ask Richard?
JOEY: Ok, uh, hey Richard, if you had an extra ticket to the Knicks game and you had to choose between a friend who smells and one who bruises you who would you pick?
RICHARD: Wow. Well being a huge Knicks fan myself, I think you should take someone who's a huge Knicks fan.
MONICA: I meant, why don't you take Richard to the game? What?
MONICA: So what, he's a little older, big deal, I mean he's important to me. Ya know if you ask him, he might take you on his Jag. [walks off]
CHANDLER: Ooh, you almost had it.
ROSS: Oh you guys are not gonna believe what happened.
ROSS: Ok, we were sitting over there playing on the floor and he grabs the table and he pulls himself up. He pulled himself up. Standing man. I'm sorry you guys missed it but I did tape it so it you guys want to see it.
SUSAN: You can watch our tape if you want.
ROSS: Oh look, did, did you just see that? Did you see? He just waved, he just waved, he's never waved before, you've never waved before. Yes he has. Very good.
MONICA: Wow, all you need now is The Killing Fields and some guacamole and you've got yourself a part-ay.
PHOEBE: Yeah, I talked to my grandma about the Old Yeller incident, and she told me that my mom used to not show us the ends of sad movies to shield us from the pain and sadness. You know, before she killed herself.
MONICA: Hey. Where is he, where's Richard? Did you ditch him?
JOEY: Yeah right after we stole his lunch money and gave him a wedgie. What's the matter with you, he's parking the car.
MONICA: So'd you guys have fun?
RACHEL: Wow, he must like you the best.
JOEY: Oh, what about that thing he did when he tipped the guy who showed us to our seats. You never even saw the money, it was like this. [With money in his palm] Hey Chandler, thanks for showing us to our seats [shakes his had and passes the dollar].
MONICA: So your first whole weekend without Ben, what're you guys gonna do?
CAROL and SUSAN: We love you. Buy.
MONICA: Look. [they look at Joey in the kitchen with a cigar in his mouth, looking at his reflection in a spatula] Joey, do you know we can see you from here?
ROSS: Well for starters, you may want to light it and lose the spatula.
MONICA: You know what, I think it's cute, you trying to be more like Richard.
MONICA: So Joey, why didn't you grow a moustache?
ROSS: Yeah, you really sidestepped that land mine.
MONICA: Well, he told me he was going out with the guys, I just didn't know that you were the guys.
CHANDLER: You hear that? We're the guys.
MONICA: With that moustache doesn't Chandler remind you of Aunt Sylvia?
ROSS: Thank you.
ROSS: Hi, we're visitiing. It's Ben and his da-da. Da-da. Can you say da-da? Look, I'm gonna tell your momies you said it anyway so you might as well try.
ROSS: Naa. A while ago I got a sah out of him, which I thought, ya know, might turn into sah-condary caregiver but... Hey, would you uh, would you hold him for a sec, 'cause I, I gotta take this off.
ROSS: What're you doing?
RACHEL: Ok, I'm sorry, I'm just not very good with babies. I mean I haven't been around them, I mean, you know, since I was one.
RACHEL: You think about stuff like that?
RACHEL: Wow. Wow, that's great. Great. Ok, wow, you know what.
RACHEL: I'm off my break now so uh, um here you take this [hands back Ben] and um, I am gonna go pour these very nice people some coffee. Ok. Oh look at that, I don't have a pot. I don't have a pot. Well, hey, maybe I've got one at home, or in Scarsdale. Hey is that a door? [leaves]
MONICA: So you watched the movies huh?
MONICA: Alright, you wanna feel better?
MONICA: So you can't lose, it's there in the title. Wonderfullness is baked right in.
RICHARD: Uh, the guy was Lou Gehrig. Didn't you kinda see it coming?
MONICA: Listen, um honey, I appreciate this but you don't have to keep hanging out with them for me, I mean, they have each other.
RACHEL: I don't know, you tell me. One minute I'm holding Ben like a football, the next thing I know, I've got two kids, I'm living in Scarsdale complaining about the taxes.
RACHEL: Ross, you have planned out the next 20 years of our lives, we've been dating for six weeks.
ROSS: C'mon, what, you never think about our future?
RACHEL: Yes, but I, I think about who's apartment we're gonna sleep at tomorrow night and, and where we're gonna have dinner next Saturday night. I do not think about what our childrens' names are gonna be. You know what our childrens names are gonna be.
RACHEL: But I do not want to have everything decided for me. I spent my whole life like that. It's what I had with Barry, that was one of the reasons I left. I, I like not knowing right now and I'm sorry if that scares you but if you want to be with me you are gonna have to deal with that.
RACHEL: Thank you.
ROSS: Ok, then you're gonna have to understand that you're with a guy who's not gonna stop planning his future with you because he knows that we're gonna end up together and if that scares you, tough, 'cause you're gonna have to deal with that.
ROSS: Good, 'cause I love you.
RACHEL: Well I love you too.
ROSS: Well, I'm gonna kiss you.
RACHEL: Well you better.
MONICA: Did you like it?
PHOEBE: Oh yeah. You know, I don't know if I was happier when um George Bailey destroyed the family business or um, Donna Reid cried, or when the mean pharmacist made his ear bleed.
MONICA: Alright, I'll give you the ear thing but don't you think the ending was pretty wonderful?
PHOEBE: I didn't watch the ending, I was too depressed. It just kept getting worse and worse, it should have been called, "It's a sucky life and just when you think it can't suck any more it does."
JOEY: Man you are incredible.
JOEY: No no, seriously, Chandler and I were just talkin about this. He is so much cooler than our dads. [Chandler starts kicking him below the table] I mean, you know, our dad's are ok, ya know, but Richard is just- ow, ow. What are you kickin me for? Huh? I'm tryin to talk here.
RICHARD: Uh, you guys see me as a dad?
RICHARD: That's fine. Well, your other dad and I are gonna go have a romantic evening and I guess I'll just see you kids around.
CHANDLER: I can't believe you got us into trouble. [slaps Joey on the arm. Joey takes exception and slaps him back]
MONICA: [her and Richard return to her place] So are you ok?
MONICA: Come here. I'll make you feel like one of the guys. You know for a really cool guy, you suck at foosball.
RICHARD: What're you talkin' about, I was killin' 'em.
ROSS: Ok, and then you take the poopie diaper and you put it in the poopie diaper pail.
RACHEL: Ok Ross, just so you know, calling it a poopie diaper doesn't make this process any cuter.
RACHEL: I'm sorry, what did you just say? Did you just say hi? Oh my God, Ross, Ross, Ben just said 'Hi'.
CAROL: Mommy is so proud of you. Hi. Hi.
RACHEL: You know, actually it's more like, hi.
ROSS: Tuesday right. Ok, bye you guys.
RACHEL: Did, did he just, did he, did he just say, he said bye. He said bye. You said, you said bye to me. You said bye to me.
Ross: So how many more do you have tomorrow?
Mrs. Lynch: I notice that youve been trusted with a lot of rather important responsibilities.
ESTELLE: Look honey, people get fired left and right in this business. I already got you an audition for Another World.
Joey: Y-y-yeah! (As they start to leave, Rachel pauses and steals a vase with flowers in it.) Yeah you do. (They exit.)
MRS. GREENE: You thought I was Rachel?
Chandler: Yeah, I heard you and Rachel talking.
Chandler: Well, its not your fault. What are you gonna do? Not take her to the hospital? Yknow? Youre doing nothing wrong. (Pause) Except for harboring an all consuming love for the woman whose carrying his baby. (He loses his card behind the door.) Richard? If-if youre in there, could you pass me my credit card?
Ross: Yeah, yeah man don't do it. I mean if you date her, then-then-then I can't date her.
Joey: All right! Thanks! Youre the best! Now listen, the last day of auditions is Thursday. Okay? So I gotta get in there by Thursday. Okay? Just remember Thursday. Thursday. Can you remember Thursday?
Ross: I... just feel that the... the chemistry isn't right. I'm sorry. We're... we're more than happy to give you good recommendation...
Rachel: Well, yknow what? Thanks to you Im half way there! Ugh! Oh! I am so mad! Ross, I dont think I have ever been this angry!
Ross: Are you gay? (Rachel turns to Ross in an embarrassed way)
Joey: Kathy was being really nice and you just walked away. I thought we had a deal.
Joey: (on phone) Yeah, my neighbor... (Listens) Yeah, the brunette... (to Monica) She says you looked very pretty the other day in the green dress.
Barry: You know, you were right? I mean, I thought we were happy. We weren't happy. But with Mindy, now I'm happy. Spit.
Phoebe: Ooh, sorry. Um, and, and then you put your arms around me. And then you put your arms around me. (He does so) And, um, and then you tell me that you love me and you'll never forget me.
Monica: Wouldnt you be?
MONICA: Did you just flick me?
Ross: Ooh... so sad... Still, it can't be easy for you to leave Harvard? Especially after working alongside a Nobel Prize winner like Albert Wintermeyer?
Chandler: Oh my God! If you say that one more time, Im gonna break up with you!
Rachel: Oh, OH! Wow, I love those! Where did you get them?
Ross: You guys, you know what, you know what, it doesn't matter, because you both have to go get dressed before the big vain in my head pops. So..
Joey: No! No, I quit a long time ago. (Pause) Did I forget to you that one? Im sorry.
PHOEBE: Alright, I can get you out.
Ross: Oh thank you. Thanks very much. (Leans up against the board and on a thumbtack.) Ow! (He pulls away.)
Bob: Its Bob actually. Hey, you work up here, can you tell me where this Chandler Bings office is?
Lydia: Mom, we've been through this. No, I'm not calling him. I don't care if it is his kid, the guy's a jerk. No, I'm not alone. Joey's here. (pause) What do you mean, Joey who? (covers the phone, to Joey) Joey who?
Joey: (yelling back) No you didn't! (turns and goes towards his room)
Michelle: Hey, do you want to go away this weekend?
MONICA: You flicked me first.
Ross: Which is fine! Because you just turned(Removes two candles from the cake)twenty-eight!
Erica: Uh-huh! I think it's time to kick you in the nuts and see which is worse!
Rachel: Oh thats right. Youre the talker. (They both reflect on that briefly) Anyway uh, great idea! Umm, I gotta go to the store; I told him that I would buy him some more tissues.
Ross: No, God! Hey, Rach, you've been an amazing daughter, ok? Right now you just need to get some rest.
Monica: How'd you pay for them?
Richard: Of course! Im-Im sorry. I-Id hate you to miss anything like that on account of me. I can do this!
Ross: No, NO! (they're moving to the side of the bed, where they sit down) Look, I need to talk to Joey. I mean, you guys just broke up. Before anything more happens between us, I need to know he's okay with it.
Monica: (embarrassed) (To Phoebe and Rachel) I didnt even tell him to say that. (They hug). All right youre off my list.
CHANDLER: Whoever stood you up is a jerk.
Joey: Oh, you told her you broke all the plates, huh? (Chandler walks back, looking angrily at Joey)
Phoebe: Okay Ive got one for you, if you had too which one would you rather eat, a seeing eye dog or a talking gorilla?
Phoebe: Wherere you going?
MONICA: Thank you.
CHAN: It's my game. You want the job or not?
Chandler: Man, if you tried something like that on my birthday, you'd be starin' at the business end of a hissy fit.
Rachel: And I hope Barry doesn't kill you and eat you in Aruba.
Ross: Come on sweetie! Youve had to work late every night for the past two weeks, what is it this time?
Phoebe: I wouldn't say never, you know there's that guy (pause) well what about (pause) ok well there's gotta be someone.
Chandler: So is your apron. Youre wearing it like a cape.
Phoebe: Oh, no, no, no, no. You know what, he's not into that stuff anymore. He quit for me.
Ross: Y'know, hey! Youre the one who ended it, remember?
Joey: Yeah, Ross. You and the baby just need better blocking.
Chandler: Which is why you should do it.
RACHEL: You want me to talk you out of it?
Chandler: All right, I will help you out but you have to promise me you will not tell anyone what I am about to tell you.
ROSS: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What, you don't, uh, you don't believe in evolution?
Doctor Connelly: Above all, even though your chances of conceiving through natural means aren't great, you never know! So, keep having sex on a regular basis.
Phoebe: Good. Yknowno-no, okay, its-it feels like everythings been about me lately, so whats happening with you?
DUNCAN: I love you Phoebe. [they hug and kiss]
Nina: You wanted to see me?
Rachel: No, you know what, I think you should go.
Monica: I dont know. (Picks up a big plate from the coffee table.) Hey, Rachel, you want the big plate? I want you to have the big plate.
Chandler: Oh no-no-no, I will do it. Honey, you have to learn to sit down and relax and let your husband take care of things once and awhile. (Tries the door.) Its locked, you have to help me. Why is it locked?
Ross: Thanks. (Phoebe gets up to get a refill.) (To Monica) Oh! So for tomorrow, do you want to rent a car and drive down together or what?
Passerby: Maybe because youve got the keys?
Rachel: Are you serious?! Chandler, we ate an entire cheesecake two days ago and you want more?
CHANDLER: Well there you go.
(Ross throws his hands out in a What are you doing? gesture)
EDDIE: Not Sean Penn. Alright, I, I've got a funny one, alright. My last girlfriend Tilly. Ok, we're eating breakfast, right, and I made all these pancakes, there was like 50 pancakes right. And all of the sudden she turns to me, alright, and she says, 'Eddie.' I say, 'yeah,' she says, 'Eddie, I don't want to see you anymore.' And it was literally like she had reached into my chest, ripped out my heart, and smeared it all over my life, ya know. And now there's like this incredible abyss, ya know, and I'm falling and I keep falling and I don't think I'm ever gonna stop. [finishes laughing] That uh, wasn't such a funny story, was it?
Joey: Ah! Okay, well then you dont judge me. Im gonna suck on the cellophane from the brownie I had before. (They both do as they planned.)
Chandler: Yes! See you and I have always been like(motions that they think the same.)
Phoebe: What make you think I can?! (Shields her eyes from it.)
Ross: Im not proving anything. Okay, Im done listening to you. If I hadnt let you talk me into going to the airport in the first place, I never wouldve put my fist through the wall!
Rachel: Okay. (They start to head for the bedroom) Oh wait! Umm, did you send those contracts to Milan?
Monica: Well, because we want to get to know her better and she's never been to New York so she wants to see all the tourists' spots... you know, Statue of Liberty, Empire State Building...
Ross: (exiting the bathroom) That-that-thats all right, no honey, you take your time sweetie. Ill be right out here. (She slams the door in his face, to the gang) Shes just fixing her makeup.
Chandler: Well maybe you're going about this the wrong way. You know I mean think about it. Single white male, divorced three times,two illegitimate children. The personal ad writes itself....
PHOEBE: Um, is, is there any chance that you're rounding up? You know, like from, like 20?
Rachel: Look, I know what's going on here, okay, Mark explained it all to me. He said this is what you guys do.
Woman: Yeah, well, I had a 24-inch waist. You lose things. Now come on, get outta my way.
Chandler: It's OK. It's OK. I was always rooting for you two kids to get together.
Ross: What are you talking about?
Ross: You know how close women can get.
Ross: No thank you for Thank you.
MONICA: No. See you don't understand.
Ross: Oh, yeah I know, I know, it's a lot of boxes, but again I really appreciate you guys letting me stay here.
RICHARD: Thank you.
Joey: Well, I've never been through the tunnel myself, 'cause as I understand it, you're not allowed to go through with more than one girl in the car, right. But, it seems to me it's pretty much like anything else, you know, face your fear. It have a fear of heights, you go to the top of the building! If you're afraid of bugs.....get a bug. Right. In this case, you have a fear of commitment, so I say you go in there and be the most committed guy there ever was.
Joey: I can't believe you said woowoo. I don't even say woowoo.
Charlie: Oh, you know what? I'll come with you!
Rachel: I know, I still need to talk to you.
Ross: So uhh, you ready?
Chandler: I hope she throws up on you.
JOEY: Hey. Mr. Douglas is looking for you.
CHANDLER: Thank you.
Phoebe: That is so sweet, you guys. (hugs them)
Mrs. Waltham: No, Im bored with you now. Im going to cut you off. (She hangs up.)
Monica: All right, sweetie that's fine. You didn't do it on purpose.
Kim: No. No! You're doing great! Dont you give up! That's why we didn't tell you and we're not gonna drag you down with us.
CHANDLER: Look Eddie, aren't you forgetting anything?