words in movies
Ross: Hey! I just got uh, my teacher evaluations! Check out what this one student wrote, "I loved Dr. Gellers class. Mind blowing lectures! Dr. Geller, you are definitely the hottie of the paleontology department!"
Joey: Oh hey, do you still have their final exams?
Joey: Oh, cause you can just match the evaluation to the exam with the same handwriting and boom, theres your admirer. (Ross is stunned.)
Joey: Oh, well think of it like this, when youre 90
Joey: No thats not what I was going to say at all. No, what I was going to say is when youre 90 youll still have the memory of what it was like to be with a 20-year-old.
Joey: Hey Chandler! Yknow that girl you went to college with who-who became a movie director?
Joey: Oh well listen, anyway shes directing the new Al Pacino movie. You gotta get me an audition!
Joey: No-no-no, please-please Chandler I-I-I would owe you so much!
Chandler: You do owe me so much. You owe me three thousand, four hundred
Joey: Hey-hey dude, why are you changing the subject? Why? Will you make the call or what?
Joey: All right! Thanks! Youre the best! Now listen, the last day of auditions is Thursday. Okay? So I gotta get in there by Thursday. Okay? Just remember Thursday. Thursday. Can you remember Thursday?
Joey: (angrily) Thursday! Look if you need help remembering think of like this, the third day. All right? Monday, one day. Tuesday, two day. Wednesday, when? Huh? What day? Thursday! The third day! Okay?!
Chandler: (sarcastically) Thank you.
Chandler: You just thought of that in there?
Monica: Youre on the phone!
Rachel: (on phone) Oh my God! Oh my God! Thank you! (Hangs up) That was the fire department, there was a fire at our place!
Chandler: What are you smiling about? What is so funny?
Burt: (another professor) Wow! It looks like you were very generous with your grades this semester! (Ross frantically starts to change some as a female student, Elizabeth, approaches.)
Ross: Oh thank you. Thanks very much. (Leans up against the board and on a thumbtack.) Ow! (He pulls away.)
Elizabeth: Uh, Im a little embarrassed about calling you a hottie on my evaluation
Ross: That was you?
Elizabeth: Yeah. I felt a little weird about it. Youre a teacher. Im a student. But would you maybe want to go out with me sometime?
Elizabeth: Oh, because I was thinking, the semesters over; youre not my teacher anymore.
Elizabeth: (checks her grade) Oh, yknow what? Forget it, you already gave me an A.
Joey: (to the fireman) Hey buddy, do you think I can borrow your uniform this Thursday?
Monica: Joey! Hes working! (To Chandler) You would look good in that.
Fireman #1: So uh, youre not gonna be able to live here for a while, you ladies have a place to stay?
Rachel: (stands up) Wow! Oh-okay, look pal, I am not in the mood to be hit on right now! But if you give me your number I will call you some other time.
Chandler: Have you figured out what started the fire Mr. Fireman?
Fireman #1: Well uh, do either of you smoke?
Fireman #1: No-no-no, do you uh light candles? Burn incense?
Chandler: (on phone) Oh thats great! Good for you.
Chandler: Okay! So yeah, maybe we can get together umm (Joey mimes throwing something in the air, catching it, rolling it out, putting it in an oven and cutting it.) Can you hold for one second please? (To Joey) What?!
Joey: When youre off the phone, do you wanna get a pizza?
Monica: Wow! So, now youre going on a date with this girl?
Chandler: Honey, it is not a date! I havent talked to her in ten years! You cant just call up somebody you havent talked to in ten years and ask them for a favor. There are rules, yknow? You gotta, you got to put in some time.
Monica: Youre right, Im sorry. Its not like youre yknow, going out with an ex-girlfriend.
Monica: You dated her!
Joey: Hey, you wanna do Joey a favor, maybe you go out with Joey. (He turns around to see Chandler glaring at him.)
Dana: Apparently Howies editing now. Yeah, he-he-he calls me up and asks me if he can edit my new movie. Can you believe that?! Yknow I-I-I havent spoken to him in like ten years and he asks me for a favor!
Dana: No, no "How you doing?" Man, I mean not even a cup of coffee first!
Monica: I know! Now look, theres only one problem though. Theres only room for one, so I guess one of you will have to stay at Joeys.
Phoebe: Well, since the fire was kinda my fault I guess (To Rachel) you should get to stay here.
Phoebe: Well no, it was my fault so you should get the nice room.
Monica: So Rach! Youre the first guest at Hotel Monica! Umm, youll just have to tell me how you like your eggs in the morning. And I thought I would bring them to you, yknow, in bed. Oh, you have been through so much.
Elizabeth: Oh please! It was such a big class! You never even noticed me!
Ross: What? Of course I did! You uh, you sat next to Sleepy Sleeperson.
Ross: Oh uh, I had trouble remembering everyones name, so I-I kinda came up with nicknames. Like the guy on the other side of you was Smelly von Brownshirt.
Elizabeth: Oh yeah. So umm, did you have a nickname for me?
Elizabeth: Yes you did! What was it?
Ross: Listen, I gotta tell ya, I-Im having a great time! Yknow how before you said it might be weird, the whole student teacher thing, and to be frank I thought it would be too, but its not. I mean its not at all.
Phoebe: So did you sleep well last night?
Monica: Now there you go! I wouldnt want my best guest to strain her eyes!
Monica: Does that smell bother you?
Monica: Well you let me know if you can, because yknow I can bake a pie to cover it.
Monica: Hello? (Listens) Oh yes, one minute please. (To Phoebe) Its for you. Its the fire inspector.
Joey: (in a funny voice) Yeah, so it turns out that it wasnt the hair straightener that started the fire. (Rachel prompts him on what to say next.) No-no, it was the candles. Its very not good leaving candles unattended. In fact, one of the first things they teach you in fire school is (Phoebe suddenly enters.) Uhh Uhh Okay. Well, I have to go now. (Phoebe leaves.)
Monica: Well Ross, you be careful now. You dont want to get a reputation as yknow Professor McNailshisstudents.
Joey: Well Ross, it seems pretty clear. I mean whats more important? What people think or how you feel, huh? Ross, you gotta follow your heart.
Joey: You couldnt do it?!
Monica: What?! Youre going out with her again!
Monica: Joey! You didnt even know her!
Chandler: Great story again! The yarns that you weave! Woo-hoo-hoo!
Dana: Wow. Oh, I am really flattered, but I just I dont feel that way about you.
Dana: Im sorry Chandler, yknow you are such a sweet guy and I, I dont want to hurt you. Oh, I wish there was something I can do to make you feel better.
Chandler: Well maybe there is one thing you can do.
Dana: Absolutely! But you-you would really feel better about me rejecting you if your actor friend can audition for my movie?
Chandler: Well, the heart wants what it wants. Ill see you later. (He runs off and leaves her with the bill, which the waiter promptly delivers.)
Monica: But you should eat them now because theyre hot from the oven.
Monica: (opening the door) What are you doing?
Joey: Rach! Hey! Its fine! Youre at Joeys!
Ross: What do you want to do now? Huh? You wanna go get a drink?
Ross: Oh, you have some studying to do?
Elizabeth: What are you doing?
Ross: Nothing, Im-Im just, Im so comfortable with you!
Elizabeth: Do you not want to be seen with me?
Ross: What?! No! No! Wait! Youre right, this is stupid. Who cares what people think? I mean, I mean we like each other right? Theres nothing wrong with that. Come on. (They get up and go over to the table where his colleagues are sitting.) Burt? Lydia? Mel? This is Elizabeth.
Lydia: Arent you in my Popular Culture class?
Ross: Thats right Lydia, Elizabeth here is a student and uh, were dating. And you may frown upon that, but were not gonna hide it anymore.
Mel: You are so fired.
Burt: Theyre gonna fire you! You cant date a student! Its against the rules.
Joey: Hey, here you go. (Hands her another one.)
Chandler: (To Joey) So, you busy Thursday?
Joey: Oh, very funny. I dont know if you remember, but my audition was supposed to be Thursday. (Chandler doesnt say anything until Joey figures it out.) You got me the audition?! Lets hug it up! (They hug.)
Chandler: Okay. Okay. (Joey puts him down.) What are you gonna do to me if you get the part?
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Listen umm, yeah okay, I need to talk to you!
Phoebe: Now I know that they said that the umm, the hair straightener started the fire but I think Im partly at fault. You see, I didnt, I didnt tell you but umm, but I-I had recently refilled the tissues and so yknow lets just face it, thats just kindling! So I think its better that I stay at Joeys.
Phoebe: Okay. Oh umm, Chandler, Monica is looking for you.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Okay, you have to switch with me! Monica is driving me crazy!
Phoebe: No but at Monicas you can eat cookies over the sink!
Ross: Wow! It actually is in the handbook. I cant date you or have a hot plate in my office. I cant believe we have to stop seeing each other.
Elizabeth: For what its worth I did appreciate you standing up for me. It felt really nice. It kinda made me like you even more.
Ross: I know, I know I really like you too. But we-we cant date. Its against the rules. Its forbidden.
Elizabeth: Just hearing you describe it as forbidden, its really hot.
Ross: Uh-hmm, yeah-yeah do you like it? Do-do you looove it? I just want you to know that Im changing your grade back.
Ross: Hey Pheebs, maybe this whole heart attack thing is a sign, that-that you should start think about getting a different job.
Ross: Im getting that baby out of you!
Alice: None. But if there was something you wanted to tell us, were just gonna be right over there (points to the counter) having coffee.
Rachel: Op! Youre peeping!
Monica: (without looking up from what she's doing) Besides tampons and salt? (Then looks) Ooh! My God! Maple candy! That's so sweet of you. (Opens the box) That's weird...it's empty!
Ross: So, you gals wanna hand over your money now? That way, we don't have to go through the formality of actually playing.
Joey: Oooh, what you got there?
Joey: You know what, you guys? It's their first time, why don't we just forget about the money, alright?
Chandler: You must stop! (Chandler hits what he is working on with a hammer and it collapses.)
Rachel: Yeah, honey, maybe you can talk to somebody whos had a baby. Like your mom?
MONICA: Not that, this, US. Oh my God, Ross, you-re, you're, it's jus-, you-, ever sin- you been here.
Joey: Look Rach, wasnt this supposed to a temporary thing? I thought you wanted to do fashion stuff?
Mrs. Geller: Oh, thank you Chandler! I just bought it.
Phoebe: No, you can�t go. No-no-no, I can�t hold this table on my own. If they ask me to move, I cave.
Ross: Okay, I think I might know why my parents dont like you.
Chandler: You do? Why?
Rachel: Now that youre on youre own, youre free to look as stupid as you like.
Phoebe: Yknow the only reason hes marrying you is because he thinks all the things you were saying about yourself were true.
Chandler: (to Ross) Hey, so can you make it on Friday?
Phoebe: Oh, I know a way that you can decide! All right, I'm going to ask you a series of questions and you answer as quickly as you can.
Joey: All right, I'll see you in the morning.
Joey: Thats what that was?! Cause that other thing? I thought you were on to something, but it did nothing for me.
Phoebe: Hey. So, did you talk to Rachel?
Phoebe: Maybe because you never listen to anything that I say. I talk about her all the time! DENISE!!!!!
Chandler: What are you doing?
Rachel: Okay... aahhh... Please laugh for mommy... Please? Please laugh for mommy... (Rachel makes a funny face, sticking her tongue out, making a farting noise and using her hands as antlers, wiggling her fingers... No response from Emma...) Not funny huh? Oh so, is it... only offensive novelty rap? Or maybe just, you know, rap in general? 'Cause mommy can rap... (Rachel tries to rap and makes weird movements with her arms in the process.) My name is mommy and I'm here to say / that all the babies are... Oh, I can't rap... Allright sweetheart... This is only because I love you so much, and I know that you're not gonna tell anybody... (Rachel's face is telling "Oh what am I doing? The things I have to go through... and she starts to rap) I like... big butts and I cannot lie... / You other brothers can't deny... / when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face... (Emma starts to laugh) Yes! Yes! Yes! YES! Oohhhhh! Oh! (Rachel now really gets into it, and her insecure movements start getting better) I like big butts and I cannot lie... / You other brothers can't deny... Oh Emma you're laughing! Oh you are, you really do like big butts, don't you. Oh you beautiful little weirdo... (Rachel picks up Emma and Ross now enters)
David: Umm, anyway Do you want to have dinner tonight?
CHANDLER: Yes. Hey, can I ask you, is Eddie a little...
Monica: How are you still single?!
Chandler: Yknow you, really didnt have to take me to the airport.
Gary: No, it's too soon for you guys.
Rachel: Honey, why dont you sit down? Dina has something that she wants to tell you.
Ross: Pity food? Y'know what thats okay, all right, I dont need any of you to stay, okay nobody stays.
Ross: Are you kidding?
Phoebe: Tiger! (Joey moves his hand in an attempt to do the chord, in fact he does it with each name.) Dragon! Iceberg!! (He fails.) Joseph, did you even study at all last night?
Monica: You are so handsome! I wanna make love to you right here, right now! (Growls and pulls him into a kiss.)
Ross: Joey proposed to you?
Ross: Oh-oh-ooh, hey guys, I was wondering if you guys would uh, maybe chip in on some new air filters for the air purifier? I mean after all, we all are using it.
Joey: Oh, okay. Phoebe, do you take this man to be your husband?
MNCA: We are talking about Rachel here. You and Rachel.
Leslie: What? Why not? You could make a ton of money.
FBOB: Hey, do you need me to pick you up?
Ross: (stopping him) Okay! Okay! Okay. Im sorry. Please, please, you were in Western Europe and?
Joey: Its just I cant because my manager said I (Gets an idea) (Starts singing) "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Annie
Chandler: Look I'm very glad that you saved Ross from the car backfire, but y'know, it could've been a bullet and you y'know, you didn't try to save me!
Mrs. Geller: It was you?
Chandler: (jumping up) Oh, Ill go out and get you some.
Phoebe: (on phone from Central Perk) Hey Joey, I just wanted to let you know that I found a selfless good deed. I just went down to the park and I let a bee sting me.
CHANDLER: It's about cutting my people a little slack, ya know, for morale. Look, if you wanna see some rough numbers, I can get them to you by Wednesday.
Rachel: Ooh... oooh... (pause) (Rachel is all bah-jiggity about Joey) oh, ah... (pause) (to Monica) Can I ask you a question?
Chandler: Thank you!
Phoebe: Cliff, do you really believe that a character from a TV show was here in your room?
Russell: I see. Have you considered therapy?
Lorraine: She's checking the coats. Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off my hands. Will you get me a white Zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice.
Monica: Im really gonna miss you.
Rachel: Oh, I know, I know, the odds are against us, but somebody has to win, and it could be us! And then how you gonna feel? You know, we're gonna be all like "oh everybody, let's take our helicopters up to the cape" and you're gonna be all like "oh, I can't guys, I'll meet you guys up there, I gotta gas up the Hyundai"
Chandler: That's good one too, Pheebs. Now all you have to do is find a planeload of people who's resolution is to plummet to their deaths.
MONICA: Ok. Oh boy. You are doin' so good. You wanna squeeze my hand? All right, Ross, don't squeeze it so hard. Honey, really, don't squeeze it so hard! Oh, Ross! Let go of my hand!
Monica: I thought you said you were going to do nothing.
Joey: Hey you guys.
Joey: Give me a number, I dont want to owe you anything!
Megan: And now youll see me buying it.
MONICA: You need one too?
Phoebe: Yep, and that's why we don't invite you to play.
Chandler: Why did you take the shower curtain down?
Monica: (Scoots towards the side of the bed.) Could you not look?
MR. TREEGER: I know. I was sweepin' yesterday. It coulda been me.ROSS: Sure, sweepin'. You never know.
Ross: Are you serious?
Monica: Look, I know that you're in a place right now where you really need to hate Julie's guts, but she didn't do anything wrong. I mean, she was just a girl who met a guy, and now they go out. I really think that if you gave her a chance, you'd like her. Would you just give that a chance, for me?
Chandler: What, what are you laughing at?
RACH: Hey, there was one Italian guy, OK, and do you even have a point?
Ross: Im asking you to do me a favor.
Ross: Did she (points at Amy) do this to her? I told you we shouldn't have left Emma with her!
Mark: Wow! Somebody wants people to know you have a boyfriend.
Ross: What. Oh no, you just rolled over the juice box.
Ross: no, no, no there's nothing wrong with you I mean you don't strike me as the type of person that wants to get married anyway.
Monica: Oh. Why didnt you take her?
Frank: Are you serious?
Chandler: Oh right, your allergies. (Monica leaves and to the chick and duck) All her, she hates you. (Chandler leaves without finishing the message for Joey.)
Joey: Its not what you said. Its the way you said it .Oh My God, Im a women!!!
Chandler: Lowell? Financial Services' Lowell, that's who you saw me with?
Monica: Wow! Youre a lot sturdier that Chandler. He crumpled like a piece of paper. So how was youre trip?
Joey: What do you mean?
Monica: If the school finds out youre fired.
PRODUCER:They're your backup singers... beind you.
Chandler: Yeah! All right! You go first.
Chandler: I just didn't want to tell you in front of them.
Chandler: Joey told you about the leg, huh?
Rachel: Joey, come on! It doesn't matter, you know, it's not like anything's gonna happen.
Joey: I know, but, I was the best, you know? I liked being the best. (He downs the glass of juice in one swig.) I don't know. Maybe I should just get outta the game. They need guys up in housewares to serve cheese.
Phoebe: What? You mean behind my back?
Janice: Hes a keeper. How are you feeling?
Chandler: Who did you originally want to hook up with?
Rachel: Oh, god, this is great! The plane is gone, so it looks like I'm stuck here with you guys.
PHOEBE: Ohh, ok, I see what you did there. Aren't you afraid though, that the writers are gonna be kinda mad when they read this?
Rachel: I guess you don't.
Phoebe: Yeah, in the back. You want a quarter?
Chandler: Well, you can understand, given how we started.
The Grip: Hey pal, are you Joey Tribbiani?