words in movies
Chandler: So did Monica tell you about this great band called the Swing Kings that were trying to get to play at the wedding?
Phoebe: Since when are you into swing music?
Chandler: Gap commercial. (To Monica) So did you book them? Did you call?
Chandler: Do you want me to call?
Monica: No, Ill do it. You just stick to your job.
Joey: This is impossible Monica, why dont you just pick all 15? (Hands back the paper.)
The Woman: Could you guys help me? (Chandler shyly exhales and looks away.)
Ross: Uh yeah! Let me, let me get that for you.
Ross: Kristen, hi. Are you uh, new to the area, cause if you are Id love to show you around sometime.
Ross: Umm, say youre gonna be starving after all this moving. What do you say I take you to dinner tonight?
Ross: Great! Uh, let me take this up for you. (The box hes holding.)
Kristen: After you.
Ross: Oh no-no, after you. (She grabs a chair and heads upstairs.) (When shes gone.) Oh my God! (He drops the box and Chandler cant pick it up.)
Rachel: Oh my God! You look so beautiful!
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Thank you Rachel but, look at Monica!
The Woman: Wow you look so beautiful! If I knew you, Id cry.
Monica: Have you found your dress yet?
Monica: Yeah! So-so when are you getting married?
Megan: (To Monica) So when are you getting married?
Megan: We met with him. Did he show you the photos of the nude wedding he did?
Megan: Oh, youre so lucky. My fiancee wants the heavy metal band Carcass.
Rachel: Oh yknow what? Yknow what? Now that you know what you want you should go to Kleinmans and get it half off. This place is so overpriced.
Joey: (checking her out) Hi! You uh, movin in or movin out?
Joey: Oh uh, can I give you a hand?
Kristen: So uh, do you live around here?
Joey: Yeah! Yeah! Right down there. (Points.) Hey listen; let me give you a little tip. Do not take a nap on this stoop (Points to hers) or you can wake up with your shoes gone.
Joey: Okay. Yeah. Listen would you uh, would you like to have dinner with me tonight?
Kristen: You look strong, why dont I take that and you grab one of the boxes.
Monica: All right, listen up. There is usually only one dress in each size so when they open those doors, fan out. Now, this is what youre looking for! (Holds up a picture of it.) Memorize it! When you locate the dress, blow on these. All right? (She passes out whistles to them.) Three short blasts, when you hear it. Come running.
Monica: You came?!
Monica: Yes it is! You saw me wearing it!
Megan: And now youll see me buying it.
Monica: What? You freak! You wouldnt even have known about this place if it wasnt for me!
Megan: Look, you dont want to fight me.
Phoebe: Okay! (Runs that way and hears another whistle blast.) Hey! (Heads the other way and hears another blast.) What do I do?!! (She runs in the second direction and finds that the whistling is coming from inside a rack. She moves the dresses out of the way to find Rachel curled up in a fetal position frantically blowing on the whistle.) What are you doing? (Rachel doesnt stop.) Did you find the dress? (Rachel wont stop so Phoebe pinches her nose shut which causes her to spit the whistle out.)
Phoebe: Did you find the dress?
Rachel: No! You gotta get me out of here Phoebe! These bargain shoppers are crazy!
Rachel: No! You gotta hold my hand!!
Chandler: So Ross, how was your date the other night? Did you tell her about the magical ride that starts with the flush of every toilet?
Ross: Laugh all you want but uh, she actually left me a message saying shed like to go out again.
Chandler: Uh Joe, when its one oclock in the morning and you dont come by? Thats okay!
Chandler: Whend you meet her?
Chandler: (sarcastically shocked) Really?! Joe? What would you do if you were in Rosss situation?
Ross: Well you shouldnt be. Believe me I wouldnt want to be the guy whos up against you. (Chandler laughs.) I mean that doofus is going to lose!
Chandler: So this is nice! I wish I didnt have to go, believe me! But unfortunately I have to. (He gets up and Joey moves over next to Ross.) Oh uh, by the way, whats the name the girl youre dating?
Rachel: Youre out of Diet Coke.
Monica: Hello? (Listens) What?! (Listens) You what?! (Listens) Hey you listen here missy! (Listens) Wh(She is hung up on.)
Rachel: Youre out of toilet paper!
Joey: I just wanted to come by and yknow, wish you good luck on your date.
Joey: Yeah. What time are you meeting her?
Joey: Wow, thats in like 20 minutes. Youd better get dressed.
Joey: Oh. Well good! (To himself) For me. (He picks up a jar of lotion.) What is this? Did you give yourself a facial?
Joey: Okay dude! (Finds a receit.) Hey you uh, you sent Kristen flowers.
Joey: You spent a hundred dollars. Thats the limit. Youre screwed!
Ross: Oh yeah? What are you gonna do?
Joey: Yknow what Ross? Im not gonna let you get away with this!
Ross: I dont think you have much choice.
Chandler: (returning) What are you guys talking about?
Rachel: Well you have to because maybe its stupid.
Chandler: Well its just while Monica and I were dancing to them it was the first time I knew that you were the woman I wanted to dance all my dances with.
Ross: Oh yeah its fine. I guess the more muscles you have the more they can spasim out of control.
Kristen: Hi! What are you doing here?
Ross: Hi. (They shake hands.) Its nice to meet you. I used to have a friend named Joey. I dont anymore.
Joey: Sure! I would love to wait with you guys! Thanks! (Sits down.)
Ross: So Joey umm, you look familiar. Are uh, are you on TV or something?
Ross: Thats right! Thats right, dont you play a woman?
Joey: So yknow Ross its funny cause, you look familiar to me too. Have you ever been married?
Joey: So youve just married the one time then?
Kristen: Youve been married twice?
Ross: Yes. And another time after that. Boy Im getting hungry! Hey Joey, have you ever been so hungry on a date that when a girl goes to the bathroom you eat some of her food?
Kristen: You said the waiter ate my crab cake.
Kristen: Do you two know each other?
Ross: Wait a minute! Were you on a poster for gonorrhea?
Joey: Have you ever slept in the same bed as a monkey?!
Ross: Hey you leave Marcel out of this!
Joey: Fine! Have you ever got stuck in a pair of your own leather pants?!
Ross: Hey-hey have you ever locked yourself in a TV cabinet VD boy?!
Joey: When do you think we lost her?
Chandler: Why? Do you another boyfriend in there or something?
Chandler: Yknow its funny I started it but, now its scary me. So could you come out here please?
Chandler: Oh you got a wedding dress? Thats great!
Monica: Oh. I guess you can. Okay but; I-I have to return it, so you cant like it.
Chandler: Yeah, thats like the most ugliest dress Ive ever seen. Wh-why do you to return it?
Chandler: Oh thats great! Great! Thanks! But that dress I mean its like yuck! Its terrible! It makes me wanna just rip it right off of you!
Monica: Okay! But you cant rip it. Well, maybe a little.
Monica: (entering) Hey guys! Do you wanna look at the song list for the wedding? (They ignore her.) Guys?
Chandler: (without turning around) I thought you were gonna be gone all day.
Monica: Im sorry. Im sorry. I-I should probably leave you girls alone. (She heads for the bedroom.)
Ross: Yeah, laugh all you want but in ten minutes were gonna have younger looking skin!
Rachel: Well, I mean, sure, of course. But... you already gave that to Monica, so...
Chandler: (on phone) Yes, Fran. I know what time it is, but I'm looking at the WENUS and I'm not happy!... (Listens) Oh, really, really, really? Well, let me tell you something... you will care about it, because I care about it! You got it? Good! (slams phone down, then leans back and realizes what just happened) Whooooaaaa....
Chandler: Oh, hey, when she gets here, is it ok if I introduce you two as "my wife" and "the woman who's carrying my child"? (she's not amused) No? Divorce?
Mike: Phoebe, I love you. I mean, I missed you so much these last few months and I thought we were apart for a good reason, but then I suddenly realized that there was no reason good enough to keep me from spending the rest of my life with you.
Charlie: So, why did you break up?
Elizabeth: You wanted to see me Professor Geller?
Rachel: (she looks at the cake) Oh my God! Look what... you made it into a bunny. How did you do that?
Phoebe: Hey, Joey! Hey! Ooh! Ooh! I just say someone on thethat looks just like you on the subway. And I was gonna go over and say hi! but then I figured, he doesnt care if he looks like you.
Ross: Yeah. The bartender said that they split up into two search parties, the herbivores and the carnivores. (pause) You know, we as a group are not the coolest.
Joey: Hey! It is unacceptable that you two would have sex with Emma in the next room. I'm gonna have to tell Rachel about this.
Chandler: Y'know what, I know what will cheer you guys up! (he starts spreading envelopes among them) I had a little talk with the boys in New York, told 'em about all the hard work you've been doing and that a little Christmas bonus may be in order.
Chandler: Yeah! It's a stupid job, and I could not stand leaving you. And why should I be the only one who doesn't get to do what he *really* wants to do?
Phoebe: (to the nurse) Excuse me? Could you help me with something? The patient Im looking for has a broken leg and is in a wheelchair. And umm, hes like early to mid-thirties, very attractive.
Chandler: Yes, as a matter of fact he did, so I can't let you go.
Ross: (laughing) Why, why you do, like with the-the toe separators?
Monica: Do you want some shortbread? Eh thats Scottish like you are.
Phoebe: All right, everyone calm down! Everyone calm down! I have something that I would like to say! Who here likes Ross? (Ross is the only one who raises his hand and Phoebe glares at him to put his hand back down.) Of course you don't like him! He-he didn't give you any money, he raised his own hand when I asked, "Who hear likes Ross," and he's wearing two nametags! (He takes one off.) I-I'll be honest with you guys, when I first met Ross I didn't like him at all! But then once I got to know him I saw that he's really sweet and caring and very generous. I mean, all I'm saying is don't judge Ross before you get to know him all right? I mean, I like all you guys now, but when I first meet you y'know Kurt, I thought, y'know abrasive drunk, umm Lola, mind numbingly stupid! And okay, you guys (She turns to an elderly gentleman and a 20 something woman, who're a couple.) (To the girl) Gold-digger, (To the old guy) cradle robbing perv! So, I think you all know what I mean.
Rachel: Oh. Well then, you better go take that back because they're gonna charge you for that.
Monica: Chandler! I have to tell you, you smell so smokey I have to get up. I'm not kidding. (She's not; she stands and walks away. Chandler moves closer.)
PHOEBE: Ya know, in all the years that we have been grandmother and granddaughter, you have never lied to me.
Rachel: Make love? What are you a girl?
Ross: No. No-no. No. What would you do next?
Joey: All right, all right, all right, all right, all right, you really wanna know how I did it, Ill show ya. When you handed me back the card, what you didnt see was, I looked at it so fast that it was invisible to the naked eye. (picks up a card and quickly looks at it) I just did it. (does it again) I just did it, again. Here, Ill slow it down so that you guys can see it. (looks and the card in slow motion)
Phoebe Sr.: Sorry. But just one last thing. Y'know you came looking for family. Im family, Im it. Now, now Im done. (starts to leave)
Monica: Then youd be going back and forth all the time, I mean it doesnt make any sense.
Monica: What are you doing here? I thought you had to do inventory all day.
Mrs. Burkart: (singing) Jeepers, creepers, where'd you get those peepers? Jeepers, creepers, where'd you get those eyes?
Matthew: Well thank for coming here, its good to see you.
Chandler: Do you want a calculator?
Rachel: Would you let me talk. [flicks Monica on the forehead]
Ross: It's old, it's definitely old. Didn't you hear the, the double beep?
Chandler: I never sucked, I actually didn't want you to know how good I was!
Chandler: Yeah, yeah, yeah! I want you... I need you... I must have you Janice Litman Goralnik Neihosenstein.
Joey: Well youre whippin so slow! Cant you do it any faster?
Phoebe: Thats it?! You call that a fight? Come on! "We were on a break!" "No we werent!" What happened to you two?!
Rachel: Well, when we first met, you know, I thought you were pompous and arrogant and obnoxious ...
Chandler: Stop it! Youre killing me! I think I just moved on to Phase Four!
Monica: This is where I thought the barca lounger could go! You see you could see the TV and its still walking distance to the kitchen.
Monica: And what are you laughing at, Miss `My-keg-sucking-boyfriend-is-stealing-from-me!'
Joey: Good evening. Im Mr. Tribbiani. And I will be teaching acting for soap operas. Now um, on my first day as (proudly) Dr. Drake Remoray on Days of Our Lives, (looks for a reaction from his students, and gets none.) I learned that one of the most important things in soap opera acting is reacting, this does not mean acting again, it means, you dont have a line, but someone else just did. And it goes like this. (looks all intense for a moment and then gasps, the students cheer him) Thanks, thanks, a lot. Oh, by the way, before I forget to work in soap operas some of you will have to become much more attractive. All right, moving right along.
Monica: Oh, I know. I know. Hey, you know, you can take it if you want! The lease is still in Nana's name.
Phoebe: But I already gave them back to you!
Rachel: Are you kidding? I'm trained for nothing! I was laughed out of twelve interviews today.
Phoebe: Umm, not without you, lover. (She slowly walks over to him and is showcasing her bra.) So, this is my bra.
PHOEBE: Uh-huh, let's go. (they move in to kiss) Oh, wait I have gum. Okay. (they kiss rather passionately) Good, very good, firm but tender. I'd recommend you to a friend.
Chandler: Well, I like that idea. Obviously! I was thinking maybe-maybe-maybe it could be a game room, yknow? I mean you can buy old arcade games like uh, like Space Invaders and Asteroids for $200, the real ones! The big-big ones!
Ross: God, you're amazing... I didn't even have to ask you to call me that.
Phoebe: Oh Chandler! Thank God you're alive. Monica, can I talk to you outside for a minute?
Rachel: Im funny? Oh thank God! Well hey, Ive got a ton of these! Umm, oh hearDo you want a good one? Heres a good one. Umm, you uh, you take a quarter, take a quarter and, and you blacken the edge. Right? (Does so.) And then you say to person, I bet you cant roll this quarter from your forehead to your chin without it leaving your face. And then when they do it, theyre left with a big black pencil line right down the center of their face.
Rachel: (poking her head in from her bedroom) Uh, morning. Do you guys think you could close your eyes for just a sec?
Ross: Yeah, but you were the one who got him back, y'know? You, you were great. ...Hey, we uh, we still have that, uh, that bottle of wine. You in the mood for, uh, something grape?
Joey: This is Vegas man! People will pay to see freaky stuff! Okay, how much would you pay to see this hand (Holds up his left hand) twice? Huh?
Monica: No! No! No! No sweetie! No! Not like that! Were not at a barn dance. Youve gottayou wanna fold them like swans. Like I showed you at Christmas time, remember?
Monica: You really liked it?
Joey: (impressed) Wow! You look... (drops the cookie)... stop-eating hot! Which is like the highest level of hotness!
Phoebe: Fine, I'll give you her number.
Lewis: I know I didnt do well on my midterms and stuff but, I was kinda hoping you could change my grade.
Monica: Rach, that's great! It's so good that you had a good time in Greece!
Phoebe: YOU’RE SO GENEROUS AND KIND AND (crowd stops cheering) YOU'RE AMAZING IN BED (everyone hears it and stare at them.) (to everybody) IT’S OUR ANNIVERSARY!
MONICA: Exactly. Oh, I love that I can be totally neurotic around you now. Tell me the truth. Don't you like it better now that everything on your desk is perpendicular?
Ross: I have shown you everything we have. Unless you want your mother to spend eternity in a lemon yellow pant-suit, go with the burgundy.
Joey: You don't know how long we're gonna be in here! We may have to repopulate the Earth.
Joshua: I invested in this night-club and its opening tonight, would you like to come?
Monica: You bet your ass Im gonna fire you! Get out of my kitchen! Get out!! (Joey leaves) All right! Anybody else got a problem? How bout you Chuckles? You think this is funny now?
Phoebe: Okay, you have 19 questions left. Use them wisely. (Joey groans.) Come on Joey! You cant win if you dont ask any (sees that hes asleep) QUESTIONS!!!
Rachel: Hi! You might not remember us, but we are the girls that fogged you.
Joey: (To Rachel) Do you think he saw us or can we still sneak out?
Ross: (loudly so that everyone can hear) Hey lady! I don't care how much you want it! Okay?! I am not gonna to have sex with you in the bathroom! (Rachel sinks lower on her chair trying to hide.)
Ross: Yeah, see Mon, listen, listen. When Carol and I broke up, I went through the same thing. And you know what I did?
Rachel: (to them) Just a minute!!! (She takes the candy and opens the door to two parents, a witch, a clown, and a cowgirl.) Look at you guys! Wow! You are a very scary witch. (Gives her candy.)
Monica: in this day and age how dumb do you have to be to get pregnant?
Rachel: (Resenting the truth) I am not a baby! You know what? I swear to god, just because you get so uptight every time we...
Joey: So, you just left? Her place was really that bad?
Gunther: Remind me to review with you which pot is decaf and which is regular.
Joey: We good? Yeah? Good? Once again, I pronounce you husband and wife. (To Chandler) Now kiss her again.
Chandler: Well, you got here just in time. I really have to go buddy. (They hug)
Ross: When we first met her, she was soaking, her feet were wet! Who wouldnt be miserable? Im telling you when I got her into a dry pair of shoes, she was a totally different person.
Rachel: Oh, okay. Is that what you want to do? You wanna go over and give a little shout out to the old, hot chickas? Okay, lets do that Sailor Joe. Quick question though, (grabs some of the rigging) whats this called?
Monica: What?! Ross y'know this isnt even about you! I mean this is about Rachel and something wonderful happening for her. I mean you know even if youre right, what if he wants to sleep with her, does it mean he gets too?
MNCA: Chandler, I'm unemployed and in dire need of a project. Ya wanna work out? I can remake you.
Frank Sr.: Y'know what, I gotta go. And thank you so much for coming. (Hands back his glasses and hurries out.)
Chandler: You tell me! Maybe, its because I was just fooling with my ex! Oh no-no-no-no, no-no-no-no, that was you!!
BEST MAN: (standing up) Yo! Can I have your attention, please, Best Man, making a toast here. Thank you. (clears throat, and starts reading his toast) I remember when Barry got home from his first date with Rachel...
MONICA: I know, how can you not be accross the hall anymore.
Ross: Right! Right! I justI want you to know that Im going to be there through this whole thing, okay? Okay? The doctors appointments, the uh, the Lamaze classes, uh baby-proofing the apartmentAlthough we could probably worry about that til after we get married.
Rachel: Joey, why wouldn't you invite us to your parties?
Rachel: No please, show me how I begged you!
Rachel (awkward chuckle): Now, come on, come on, Steve. There must be something that you like about yourself.
Joey: Hey, if you need a tour guide... (point to himself)
Ross: See, Rach, uh, see, I don't think that swearing off guys altogether is the answer. I really don't. I think that what you need is to develop a more sophisticated screening process.
Rachel: (to Charlie) Hey, hi! Hey, where've you been?
Ross: Come on Rach, you cant even eat alone in a restaurant.
Joey: (whispering to Chandler) Youll tell me later?
Monica: Ohhh, ooohhh... you are on a roll, mister!
Rachel: I overheard you guys on the phone the other day, and you said, "I'll just tell Rachel that I'm doing laundry for a couple of hours." And he said, "Laundry? Is that my new nickname?" And you said, "No! You know what your nickname is, Mr. Big."
Rachel: Well, apparently she caught him cheating on her with someone else. Isnt that sad? (Giggles.) God, could you imagine if I actually married him?! I mean how different would my life be?
ROSS: Naa. A while ago I got a sah out of him, which I thought, ya know, might turn into sah-condary caregiver but... Hey, would you uh, would you hold him for a sec, 'cause I, I gotta take this off.
Phoebe: So you like the drums! That's, that's great! Yknow, I was worried, that, you know, they would maybe an unbearable living situation. All right, okay, well, apparently not! So, yay!
Bitter lady: (yelling) Why don't you like me?! Chapter One: My first period.
Bill: Some little snacks for everybody. Oh, you don't have to eat the sour worms. Those are for Owen.