words in movies
[Scene: Rifts Restaurant, as seen in Mad About You, Joey and Chandler are there.]
Chandler: This is unbelievable. Its been like a half an hour. If this was a cartoon, youd be looking like a ham right about now.
Chandler: Wait, wait! Wh-what are you doing here?
Ursula: Yeah, um, I was over there, then you said, "Excuse me, hello Miss," so now Im here.
Joey: No, no... how come you are working here?
Chandler: You know that thing, when you and I talk to each other about things?
Chandler: Oh, you do? Because she said you guys havent talked in like years.
Phoebe: (Turning to Chandler) where were you standing?
Rachel: Um, Pheebs, so, you guys just dont get along?
Phoebe: Its mostly just dumb sister stuff, you know, I mean, like, everyone always thought of her as the pretty one, you know... Oh, oh, she was the first one to start walking, even though I did it... later that same day. But, to my parents, by then it was like "yeah, right, well what else is new?"
Chandler: Oh, and Ive got Earth Science, but I'll catch you in Gym.
Rachel: So, is this just gonna be you and Carol?
Teacher: Good for you. Alrighty, next?
Ross: You know how close women can get.
Chandler: And (he imitates the buzzer) to you too, Helen.
Helen: (Over the intercom) Nina Bookbinder is here to see you.
Nina: You wanted to see me?
Chandler: Uh, Yes. Yes. Ive just been going over your data here, and little thing, youve been post-dating your Friday numbers.
Ross: It doesnt matter. You dont dip your pen in the company ink.
Ross: Marcel, Marcel, give Rossie the remote. Marcel. Marcel, you give Rossie the remote right now... Marce... you give Rossie the remote...
Monica: Ah no, you see, someone was supposed to take them down around New Years... but obviously someone forgot.
Chandler: Hey, where you been?
Chandler: Yeah, listen. Okay, before you do anything Joey-like, you might wanna run it by err... (he indicates Phoebe, who is helping Ross understand the remote control.)
Joey: You think it would be okay if I asked out your sister?
Phoebe: Why? Why would you wanna... do that? Why?
Phoebe: Well, I mean, Im not my sisters, you know, whatever, and um... I mean, its true, we were one egg, once, but err, you know, weve grown apart, so, um... I dont know, why not? Okay.
Ross: You okay?
Ross: You wanna watch Laverne y Shirley?
Susan: Stuck at school. Some parent-teacher thing. You can go. Ill get the information.
Teacher: Alrighty. Were gonna start with some basic third stage breathing exercises, so Mummies, why dont you get on your back? And... coaches, you should be supporting Mummys head.
Ross: I see. So what do you propose to do?
Susan: I will flip you for it.
Mr. Douglas: Not you. Relax. Ever have to fire anyone?
Nina: Are you okay?
Chandler: (Looking down at her hand) Yes, yes I am. Err, listen, the reason that I called you in here today was, err... please dont hate me.
Chandler: (Suddenly bright) Would you like to have dinner sometime?
Rachel: So Pheebs, what do you want for your birthday?
Fran: Look, youre cold, I have to pee, and... (indicating the sign) ..theres a cup of coffee on the window. How bad could it be?
Jamie: No, no, no. We were there last night. She kept... (shuddering at the memory) ..bringing swordfish. (Indicating the ladies bathroom) are you gonna go to the, um?
Jamie: So, so youre here too?
Phoebe: Much as you are.
Monica: I cant believe you. You still havent told that girl she doesnt have a job yet?
Chandler: Well, you still havent taken down the Christmas lights.
Monica: Congratulations, I think youve found the worlds thinnest argument.
Chandler: Im just trying to find the right moment, you know?
Rachel: Oh, well, that shouldnt be so hard, now that youre dating. (Imitating men at their worst) "Sweetheart, youre fired, but how bout a quickie before I go to work?"
Chandler: You know, once youre inside, you dont have to knock any more.
Mr.Heckles: Youre doing it again.
Mr.Heckles: I can hear you through the ceiling. My cats cant sleep.
Rachel: You dont even have cats.
Joey: Phoebe, could you do me a favour? Could you try this on? I just wanna make sure it fits.
Joey: Oh, no no no. Its for Ursula. I just figured, you know, size-wise.
Rachel: Are you seein her again tonight?
Chandler: Wow, this is serious. Ive never known you to pay money for any kind of capade.
Joey: I dont know. I like her, you know. Shes different. Theres uh, somethin about her.
Phoebe: That you like, (snappily confronting Joey over the heads of the knitting circle) we get it. You like her. Great!
Joey: Hey, Phoebe, I asked you, and you said it was okay.
Chandler: Yes, yes she is. Didnt I memo you on this? See, after I let her go, err, I got a call from her psychiatrist, Dr. Flanen-nen, Dr. Flanen, Dr. Flan.
Mr. Douglas: Youre kidding? She seems so...
Chandler: Oh, no, no. Nina... (miming fairies twinkling around his head) ..she is whooo wewee-woo whoo whoo! In fact, if you asked her right now, she would have no recollection of being fired at all, none at all.
Mr. Douglas: I see. I guess you never really know whats goin on inside a persons head.
Carol: (screaming at Ross) Oh, what do you know? No one's going up to you and saying, "Hi, is that your nostril? Mind if we push this pot roast through it?"
Rachel: This is just occurring to you?
Rachel: (She comforts him too) Oh, youre gonna be great!
Ross: Aw, how can you say that? I cant even get Marcel to stop eating the bath mat. How am I gonna raise a kid?
Chandler: You know, Ross, some scientists are now saying that, that monkeys and babies are actually different.
Phoebe: Wherere you going?
Phoebe: Alright, could I just ask you one question?
Phoebe: Have you two, you know... like... you know... you know... yet?
Joey: You meant sex, right?
Nina: Do you have a sec?
Chandler: Ah, well, maybe thats, ah, because youre getting a big raise.
Nina: Oh my god! (Rushing over to give him a big hug) Youre amazing!
Chandler: Oh, you dont know. (Presses a button.) Helen, could you make sure we put through the paperwork on Miss Bookbinders raise?
Helen: (Over the intercom) So you still want me to send her psychological profile to Personnel?
Chandler: Helen drinks. (Insincerely) Will you marry me?
Chandler: Pretty well. Except for the stapler thing. (He holds up a bandaged hand.) Little tip: if youre ever in a similar situation, never ever leave your hand... (he mimes Nina taking her revenge) ..on the desk.
Monica: Are you alright?
Phoebe: Yeah. Its just, you know, its this whole stupid Ursula thing, its...
Phoebe: Um, yeah. Look, I mean, Im not saying shes like evil or anything. She just, you know, shes always breaking my stuff. When I was eight, and I wouldnt let her have my Judy Jetson thermos, so she threw it under the bus. And then, oh, and then there was Randy Brown, who was like... Have you ever had a boyfriend who was like your best friend?
Phoebe: Well, but thats what he was for me. And she you know, kind of stole him away, and then... broke his heart... and then he wouldnt even talk to me any more. Because he said he didnt wanna be around... anything that looked like either one of us.
Chandler: Youre not gonna lose him.
Monica: Hon, you gotta talk to Joey.
Ross: No, come on, he doesnt know this stuff. If he knew how you felt.
Ursula: Yeah, um, may we help you?
Monica: Rachel, what are you doing? Its freezing out here. Would you come back inside?
Rachel: No no no no no. You wanted me to take them down, so... (she climbs onto the railing to reach the top of a pole) ..Im takin em down. Okay? Whoa! (Screams.)
Rachel: (To Monica) Im okay! Im okay! (She knocks on Mr. Heckles's window.) Mr. Heckles, Mr. Heckles could you help me please?
Mike: I've missed you so much! No, I'm not gonna ask you to get back together because I know we want different things, but just to be with you one more night.
Ross: It's what you want. You should go.
Chandler: No, no, you got zero points for 'IDNEY'.
Phoebe: If you could do that, Id marry the hippity-hop.
Monica: Im gonna miss you! (They hug.)
Phoebe: Me too. Although this city is my home, so. So thats dumb what I said, dont tell him I said that. Umm, you make something up. (Mischa does so and Sergei kisses her hand.) Nice, (to Mischa) thank you. This is me. Here.
Chandler: Now imagine you live at the supermarket.
Phoebe: Um, were you planning on kissing me ever?
Chandler: Do you want me to be afraid of you?
Joey: I, um, can't tell you.
Rachel: (sarcastically) Yeah. Look Joey, its enough all right?! You keep making these stupid jokes and this sleazy innuendoes and itsIm notits just not funny anymore!
Rachel: Ross, you got that for free from the museum gift shop.
Monica: Wait! Youre supposed to wear a costume!
ROSS: Rach, come on, open up. Rach, come on, come on, Rach. You got to give me another chance.
Phoebe: Umm, thank you for meeting with me.
Phoebe: I knew it! Because you love Rachel.
Monica: Well what did you send?
Chandler: Well yeah! But now that I know that youre having these thoughts, Im back to panic, anxiety, and uh Im definitely gonna need some kind of sports drink.
Janine: Thanks. (To Monica and Ross) Great so we can all go together! I gotta run. Catch you later!
Monica: Well, I was thinking, that you gave the guys such great haircuts, I thought, maybe you'd like to do mine?
Chandler: Ahh, so how many cameras are actually on you?
Ross: Y'know, hey! Youre the one who ended it, remember?
Phoebe: oh, well, Ross probably has it, you can get it from him later.
Rachel: (gasps) Oh! You are?
Ross: You know what it's fine. If you're okay with the Barbi thing, so am I.
Monica: Chandler, please! Do you know how unbelievably glad I am that Joey was not there that night?!
GUNTHER: There you go.
Rachel: Hi, Im sorry Im late but I am ready, ready to talk you up! When does Lizs father get here?
Joey: Yeah. You know why? Cause you came to me first.
Joey: Oh anyway, I just wanted to say how wonderful I think you are.
Rachel: I'm not gonna tell you, but if you found out on your own, that would be okay and then we could talk about it. Right?
Chandler: What do you want from me, Ive never met the guy. So anyway, Rachel, Im sorry you cant stay, (Rachel is upset about leaving the orgy with the cigarette guy.) but the rest of us have a lot of work to do. (The cigarette guy starts rubbing Chandlers back.) What are you doing? (The guy just nods) All right, listen, Ive got to wake up!
ROSS: I'm Ross Geller. Wha, I'm, God in your add you said you were pretty but wow.
Chandler: What a great apology! (To Monica) And you accept! Okay, bye-bye!
Phoebe: I think he's right. You guys hang out at the coffeehouse way too much.
Rachel: Ok, I, I hear what you're sayin'. I'm with you. Um, but I, but I'm trying really hard. And I think I'm doing better. I really do. Does anybody need coffee? (everyone in the place raises their hand) Oh, look at that.
Monica: I have nothing to say to you.
Monica: I know what you mean. You're like a sister to me too.
Monica: Its beautiful! Its like the first bathroom floor there ever was. (Chandler tries to go to the bathroom) Whoa! Are you going in there for?
Monica: (to Erica) Hey, thank you. Thank you so much. (they hugs). You are SO going to Heaven!
Joey: All right now, memorize it. (Pause) You got it?
Joey: Thank you. Wait-wait-wait-wait, you see me again. Hang on, the guy's butt's blockin' me. There I am, there I am, there I am, there I am, there I am
Joey: What are you ah, what are you gonna do?
Chandler: Did you hear that?
Chandler: You okay?
Janine: Ill see you.
Phoebe: Yeah, Chandler why dont you take a walk? This doesnt concern you.
Phoebe: Wow! You guys really dont know anything!
Phoebe: Well I want to get in on this. Hey Mon? I dont think I can help you after all, I didnt realize this game was on.
Robert: You ready to go to the batting cage?
Chandler: (To Joey) Look there is no way youre doing this wedding now. Okay?
Pete: Hang on a second. (to the employees) Ill-Ill talk to you in the morning. (turns two of the three off) Im sorry what?
MNCA: Oh God, you fell off the wagon.
Luisa: Oh my God, you are! And you're Rachel Green!
Phoebe: Well, you promised me a fun road trip! Weve been on the road six hours and youve been asleep for five and a half! We are switching at the next rest stop and you are going to drive all the way back! That will be your punishment, you greedy sleeper!
Monica: Yeah, like youre gonna be pregnant. I mean pregnant.
Rachel: Oh, Monica, c'mon, you do cool things.
Hold Voice: Thank you for your patience, youre the next caller.
Monica: (relieved) Its only you.
Pete: Youre good. Youre good!
Joey: No you cant do that, where would the chick and the duck live?
Monica: And the musicians, look, they can go over here (Points to a little alcove), okay? And the chairs can face this way (Points), and (Points to Ross) You go.
Rachel: (yelling at the stranger) Alright! Enough out of you!
Phoebe: Ross, where did you get this?!
Rachel: Y'know Ross why dont you put that on your answering machine!
Ross: Okay, you go grab it!
Rachel: (turning and looking at Tom again) No-no they do but, you just have to wait.
Charlie: Oh, you mean it? That would be so fun!
Phoebe: No, that was my way of telling you. Well, it turns out hes incredibly sensitive, he keeps a journal and he paints. He even showed me charcoal drawings that he drew of me.
Chandler: Hey! Everybody at work loved you last night!
Monica: Do you know whats a bad idea?
Rachel: Monica, what are you doing?
Tim: Wow! Umm, okay. Umm (To Phoebe) I-I-I realize I came on a little strong but, its only because I think youre so amazing. (To Monica) And uh, I-I just wanna, I just wanna tell you how much I appreciate you giving me an opportunity here because Iyoure the most talented chef Ive ever worked for. Anyway (Starts to leave and Phoebe and Monica trade looks.)
Ross: You bought Shawn Cassidy!
Joey: She made me switch to light Mayo. Thats it! Thats all I got! And, you know what? It tastes the same and my pants fit better!
Joey: You guys okay?
Phoebe: Ya, you know, Rachel shell do whatever you want. Yknow, you can just walk all over her.
Monica: No, thank you.
Ross: Thats funny. Yeah. Yknow youre the funniest man here in a pink bunny costume his wife made him wear.
Joey: You got it.
Monica: Joey, do you work here?
Ross: Huh. Well, good luck to Dad. Say, how many more boxes would you have to sell in order to win?
Phoebe: Chandler what are you doing?!
Rachel: All right, thats it, you guys! What happened out there?
Chandler: There it is! So what're you gonna do?
JOEY: Uhh, cause, uhh, I'm a neurosurgeon and that was clearly a case of, uh, uh, foodal chokage. Alright, look, I got to tell you something.
Phoebe: Thats great. Good for you guys.
Phoebe: Who said you were?
Monica and Rachel: You did!
Ross: You know what, I'm sure your wish is gonna come true, but, you guys - just in case, maybe a genie will come out if we rub this lamp! (rubs lamp, stops because it's very hot) Ah!! That thing gets hot!!
Monica: (entering) Thank you Joey, thank you so much!
ROSS: Hey, Joey. You wanna open the window?
Joshua: Yeah, that would be fantastic! My-my nephew is crazy about the Knicks! This is fantastic, thank you so much Rachel. (He takes the tickets and leaves as Mr. Waltham returns.)
Monica: Okay, Chandler, you go first.
Phoebe: Ok well, before you do, I know we weren't supposed to get you going away presents, (she takes something out from her pocket) but I do have something for you.
Phoebe: Well, since the fire was kinda my fault I guess (To Rachel) you should get to stay here.
Pete: Hey, you like pizza?
MR. TREEGER: You never know.
Ross: Okay. (to Rachel) Wow! This is going so well. Did you see us? Did you see?
Monica: Hi, Chandler. There you are.