words in movies
Phoebe: Where were you?
Chandler: Oh, yeah! How did you meet her?
Chandler: Were you so late because you were burring this woman?
Rachel: Hey, yknow, at least you have somebody to miss that stuff with! I hate being alone this time of year! Next thing you know itll be Valentines Day, then my birthday, then bang!before you know it, theyre lighting that damn tree again. Ohh, I want somebody! (hearing this, Gunther moves in) Yknow, I want a man!! (Gunther leaves depressed) I mean, it doesnt even have to be a big relationship, yknow, just like a fling would be great.
Joey: Well, I know what Im giving you for Christmas.
Chandler: Yknow what? Theres some nice guys at my office, do you want me to set you up?
Rachel: Yeah! Wait a minute, its been a long time that Ive been single. How come you never offered this before?
Rachel: Well, wait a minute, youre the boss! Why dont you just yell at them? Or, fire them?
Monica: I would love too, but I cant! I mean I just cant, you know that Im not good at confrontation.
Chandler: Hey, you know what you can do? I remember reading about this director, I think it was Orson Wells, who at the beginning of the movie would hire somebody, just so he could fire them in front of everybody. Then they would all know, whos boss.
Joey: Hey, Mon! Im not doing anything, why dont you fire me?
Monica: Thats a good idea! Wait, do you know how to waiter?
Monica: All right, youre hired!
Chandler: I say, Drew! Are you seeing anybody right now? (Drew looks at him) Og-ee-op, Im not asking for me, Im I mean No, Im-Im not gay, Im not asking you out. Im not-Im not-Im not gay!
Drew: I didnt think you were gay. I do now.
Mike: Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! Is this, hot Rachel, that you took to the Christmas party, Rachel?
Phoebe: Hey! You guys, Im writing a holiday song for everyone. Do you want to hear it?
Joey: What are you talking about? Lots of things rhyme with Rachel. Bagel. Mail. Jail. Bail. Able. May-pole.
Phoebe: All good, thanks. (to Rachel) Do you maybe have a nickname have like a nickname thats easier to rhyme?
Monica: Didnt your dad used to call you Pumpkin?
Phoebe: Pumpkin? Yeah. But did he ever call you like, Budolph?
Chandler: (to Rachel) Have I got the 50 guys for you!
Chandler: Oh yeah, I just showed this a picture of you and guys were throwing themselves at me! Theyre buying me drinks! Theyre giving me stuff! (to Joey) Knicks tonight?
Phoebe: (shocked) You work with robots!!
Chandler: (pause) Yes. (to Rachel) Okay, theres this one guy, Patrick, I think youre gonna like him, hes really nice, hes funny, hes a swimmer.
Chandler: Its a big company, I dontif youI
Joey: Now, wait a second! You make food and robots?
Monica: You want a problem? Ill give you a problem!
Joey: Oh, what are you gonna do? Youre gonna fire me?
Monica: You bet your ass, Im gonna fire you! Thank you.
Ross: You know that girl I told you about who lives up in Poughkeepsie?
Phoebe: If shes no fun, why do you want to date her at all?
Monica: They baked it. I cant take this anymore. Im gonna call a meeting tonight, Im gonna fire you tonight.
Joey: You got it! Oh-oh! (He starts patting the burned spot, which just happens to be over her breast.)
Monica: What are you doing?!
Monica: Thanks. (Joeys still patting the burn spot) I think you got it!
Rachel: (entering) Chandler!! You have the best taste in men!
Chandler: Really?! I-I thought you werent looking for something serious? I thought you were looking for some kind of a fling.
Rachel: Well, y'know, possibly. (pause) You didnt tell him that, though? Right?
Rachel: You told this guy that I was looking for a fling?! You dont tell the guy that!
Rachel: Oh, between you telling him that I wanted to have a fling and me putting out on the first dateoh, hes so gonna get the wrong idea.
Monica: Hey, Joey, could you pass the cheese?
Joey: Yeah. Listen uh, Id prefer it if you didnt call me Joey. Since I dont know anyone here, I thought itd be cool to try out a cool work nickname.
Monica: Because your all gonna make up fake specials and make me cook them like you did the other night?
The Waiter: Cant hear you!
The Waiter: Hey! He has a name, its Dragon. Do you wanna know your name? Check your hat. (to another waiter) We did the hat right? (The other waiter nods yes.)
Monica: Joey, we had a deal. That-thats why youre here! Ive got to fire you!
Joey: And I gotta pay rent! Look, how-how about this? You dont fire me, instead I stay here, I gain their trust, and theyll start listening to all the nice things Ive been saying about you.
Monica: What kinda things have you been saying?
Joey: Well nothing yet, they really hate you and I want to fit in.
Phoebe: So! Ross doesnt really decorate his tree with floss, but you dont hear him complaining do you? God! (Phoebe hits her guitar which wakes up Ross with a start.)
Phoebe: So, did you pick one yet?
Phoebe: Well look, you dont really like the one from uptown and youre too exhausted from dating the one up in Poughkeepsie, so I say you just end them both. Okay? You take a train up to Poughkeepsie and break up with her, and on your way back you break up with uptown. And then by the time you get home tonight, youre done!
Ross: Yknow, youre right. Thank you.
Phoebe: Theres sooo much you dont know.
Rachel: Chandler! Patrick just uh, ended things with me. Did you or did you not tell him that I was looking for a serious relationship?
Rachel: You idiot!!
Chandler: Im sure youre right, but why?
Rachel: You dont tell a guy that youre looking for a serious relationship! You dont tell the guy that! Now you scared him away!
Rachel: Yknow, you should never be allowed to talk to people!
Chandler: Well, yknow, youre-youre gonna meet somebody! Youre a great catch! Yknow when I was telling all those guys about you, I didnt have to lie once. (He sits down on the arm of her chair)
Chandler: Yeah! You graduated Magma Ku Laude, right?
Chandler: Oh, it doesnt matter. (Kisses her on the top of her head.) Hey, yknow what, Ive got two tickets to tonights Rangers game, you wanna come with me?
Chandler: Have you ever been with a woman?
Rachel: What?! Chandler, what is the matter with you?!
Monica: I need more swordfish. (to one of the assistant chefs) Can you get me some more swordfish?
Monica: You did a minute ago!
The Waiter: You found that handle, did ya?
Monica: (starting to cry) Im a good person. And Im a good chef, and I dont deserve to have marinara sauce all over me! Yknow what, if you want me to quit this bad, then all you have to do is
Joey: (interrupting) Hey! Chef Geller! Yknow that little speech you made the other day? Well I got a problem with it!
Monica: You do?
Joey: You bet I do! I just ah, wasnt listening then, thats all.
Monica: Well if you want a problem? Ill give you a problem!
Joey: What are you gonna do? Youre gonna fire me?
Monica: You bet your ass Im gonna fire you! Get out of my kitchen! Get out!! (Joey leaves) All right! Anybody else got a problem? How bout you Chuckles? You think this is funny now?
Monica: How about if I dance around all covered in sauce? Huh? You think its funny now?
Monica: Good! Now, take those salads to table 4, (to the kitchen worker from earlier) And you! Get the swordfish! (to another assistant chef) And you! Get a haircut!
Woman On Train: I made a bet with myself that you have beautiful eyes. Now that I see them, I win.
Woman On Train: Were at my stop. But would you like to have coffee?
Ross: Coffee sounds great. (They get up) Wait, so, so you live in Montreal?
Phoebe: (singing) "Went to the store, sat on Santa's lap. Asked him to bring my friends all kind of crap. Said all you need is to write them a song. They haven't heard it, so don't try and sing along. No, don't sing along.
Ross: Yeah. I'm paying you to stop.
Ross: This is crazy! I mean, yes-yes Rachel is my good friend and I-I have loved her in the past, but now, she is just my wife! Phoebe, will you-will you help me out here?
Mona: I mean I love spending time with you, yknow I justI hope were moving forward. I mean, we should probably talk about that. Dont you think?
MONICA: So you watched the movies huh?
(Everyone looks at him. He realizes he just spilled the beans about Ross's crush on Rachel. You can hear this entire classic scene by clicking here.)
Ross: Phoebe, how could you do this to me?!
PHOEBE: Janice? You called Janice?
Angela: You know what else? He's unbelievable in bed.
ROSS: Oh right, right.� (They pause and exchange a glance. Then, Ross looks away.)� So, are you . . . ah . . . you excited about your, your first night away from Emma?
Rachel: What are you guys doing here?
Joey: Yeah, well, you don't have your racket.
Rachel: For like a half an hour! Man, you can lie about Sweden!
Monica: Oh, so you like her too Chandler?
RACHEL: Uh, OK, I mean uh, what, how are you gonna handle it. I mean, are, are ya gonna, are ya gonna talk about it before hand, are you just gonna pounce?
Phoebe: Where are you going, Mr. Suity-Man?
Mr. Geller: Well you kids talk about this place so much, we thought wed see what all the fuss is about.
Monica: Would you stop staring at her?
Chandler: Umm, hows it going with you guys?
ROSS: Number six: the way you smell.
Rachel: Just tell Joey that you watched the tape and you liked it, but your bosses didn't. Then that way, you're the good guy and they're the bad guys.
Rachel: (still can't find him) How are you doing this?
ROB: Maybe if you just played some regular kiddie songs.
Chandler: It was working until you showed up, you big tree! I mean, this isnt fair. You had your chance with her! You had your chance and you blew it! And this is my chance and I am not going to blow it because we are meant for each other! And this is all just been one stupid mistake! (Sits down heavily.) I was gonna propose tonight.
MONICA: You got it.
Rachel: She spit up. Judy! She spi�Judy! Look alive, Judy! (they sit down) Thank you.
Cop: Yeah. Ever since you flashed my badge at me, I kinda can't stop thinking about you. You're the prettiest, fake undercover whore I've ever seen.
Rachel: So, what, youre just, youre just okay with being flaky?
Tim: I gotta tell you, you look great now.
Rachel: No Phoebe, I am not letting you put makeup on my baby!
Monica: No way! You had your party, now I have mine! Is everything alright?
Mrs. Verhoeven's Daughter: Thats so sweet. (Takes the flowers.) Would you like to come in and say good-bye? Im sure it would mean a lot to her.
Dr. Green: (interrupting him) I know!! Its a museum! What, youre the only one around here who can make a joke! At least mine was funny. Ah, waiter, we will have two lobsters and a menu. (nods at Ross, and mouths I dont know to the waiter.)
Ross: Perhaps. Now Im curious, at what point during those girlish screams would you have begun to kick my ass?
Chandler: But you said you forgave me. It was just a couple of cigarettes�no big deal.
RACHEL: Well, then, you know, couldn't she have just copied my haircut?
Paul: Ross. You and I are going to have to have a little talk.
RACHEL: Maybe you should put it off.
Phoebe: Okay, we have like ten minutes. Do you want me to get into that now?!
Lydia: Joey Tribbiani. Yes, ok. Hold on. (to Joey) She wants to talk to you. Take the phone.
Ross: I'm the holiday armadillo! I'm a friend of Santa's and he sent me here to wish you (Points to Ben) a Merry Christmas!
Ross: Do you think if the Ralph Lauren people offered her her old job back, she would take it?
Ross: Look, I dont think so Pheebs. (Pause) All right, Ill do it. But just because youre a friend. (Grabs the tickets and heads to divert Whitney.)
Nurse: Well, you know your insurance will cover that.
Chandler: Say Ross, when you picture Phoebe living on the street, is she surrounded by the entire cast of Annie?
Phoebe: These are not mine... Look how flimsy they are, come on! Good God! You try to hang a guy from a waterpipe with these, they'll snap like a piece of licorice.
Phoebe: Why don't you turn them inside ou...
Joey: Listen, you know how uh, when youre wearing pants and you lean forward I check out your underwear?
Rachel: (starts crying and speaking at the same time, making it almost impossible to understand what she's saying) I wouldn't know what I'm gonna do without you...
ROSS: But, you are.
Joey: Oh. What do you do?
CHANDLER: Ooh, you almost had it.
ROB: How did you know there was a but?
CHANDLER: Hey Jo. When'd you start usin' mousse in your hair?
PHOEBE: Thank you for coming everybody. There're cookies in the back.
Monica: (shouts to Chandler) Chandler? Do you promise to be good?
Rachel: Good, Pheebs. What'd you buy?
Julie: Rachel, do you have any muffins left?
Rachel: Okay, very cute braces. Anyway yknow what, the point is Tag, start looking because you are going to find those contracts on your desk. (She goes into her office.)
Chandler: And (he imitates the buzzer) to you too, Helen.
Monica: You know what? I take back what I said before. You keep playing at the restaurant, because with your music driving people inside, my bar sales are going up like crazy.
Joey: (onscreen) "I thought I knew who the enemy was, but it was you all along."
JOEY: If you hated the bracelet so much, Chandler, you should have just said so.
Phoebe: All right, that makes sense. (Starts towards the door.) Ugh. ButScrew you Im going first! (She grabs her purse and runs out.)
Chandler: What are you crazy? That's a baby!
Melissa: Im sorry Ray-ray. I mean if I thought it happened I would say it. Maybe I passed out and you did stuff to me while I was sleeping.
Joanna: Knowing youre here, waiting for me I think its kinda exciting.
Chandler: Oh come on guys, its not like I moved to Europe! I just moved across the hall! And we would have you over all the time if it werent for (struggles to get this out) Monicas allergies. (The duck quacks.) Youre right, I could never lie to you. She hates you. (The phone rings.) Should I get that? (Laughs, then answers the phone.) Hello? (Listens) Uh no, Joeys not here right now. Can I take a message? (Listens) Yeah, okay so the audition has been moved from 5:00 to 2:30? (Listens) Okay great. (Listens.) Bye. (Hangs up the phone and goes to write the message on the Magna-Doodle on the door but Monica walks in and forces him to jump out of the way.)
Pete: One meal! Thats all Im asking for. Please? We go out, we eat, and if you dont have a good time, I give you ten grand, we call it even.
Ross: Listen. Um, listen. Something you should... know... um, Rachel and I... we're kind of a thing.
ROSS: Yes, yes I am. And you are a....
Rachel: Well, last time I almost got fired. You must end it, you must end it now!
Monica: You guys, Joey just saw Janice kissing her ex-husband.
Joey: Enough said, I'm there for you man. Where is she, upstairs?
Monica: You must feel horrible. Hey! The guys have free porn!
Monica: Chandler, do you think we talk about our relationship enough?
Rachel: No. What do you do if I say we are coming about?
JOEY: How come you have two?
PHOEBE: Not especially. But you know what, I think they had pot in them.
Joey: You dont have to seem so happy about it.
ROSS: You know what, you guys, we don't have to watch this.
Monica: You had a salad.
Monica: He says he wants to leave the country. (Pause) He thinks you hate him.
MONICA: Oh, you look so great.
Rachel: Ok. (Phoebe starts to walk in the opposite direction though. Rachel sees and follows her) Wha...? where? Where are you going?
Ross: Things you find in the ocean, (to Joey) You're gonna be on "Pyramid"!!
PHOEBE: Yeah. . . I'm sorry.� We weren't really looking for anything to happen with you guys.� I, I have a boyfriend.
Rachel: Hmm. (she opens the freezer) Umm, why do you have a copy of The Shining in your freezer?
Rachel: Joey, is what she just said ummOh my God. (Looks around the room.) You were actually gonna (Chandler picks this moment to return to the living room.) (Rachel stares in shock.)
Rachel: Op, look! Claire forgot her glasses! And she's gonna be really needing these to keep an eye on that boyfriend, who, I hear, needs to keep his stapler in his desk drawer, if you know what I'm talking about.
Phoebe: Thats good, you should be impulsive and you should be romantic. Just you did it with the wrong person. (He looks at her.) What?
Monica: No. I dont think that you and I were destined to end up together. I think that we fell in love and work hard at our relationship. Some days we work really hard.
Rachel: Oh, ok, thank you. (Molly leaves) (to Monica) Do you see what all the guys see in her?
Monica: Come on, get into bed! I want to prove to you that Im not sick! I wanna make you feel, as good as I feel. (Sneezes.)
Rachel: Okay, uh, you let me go grocery shopping, and I buy laundry detergent, but it's not the one with the easy-pour spout.
Monica: Y'know what really bothers me? Isit's how-how different you act around them! I mean y'know the throwing the tennis games, the fake laugh, the "I'll see you around, Bing!" "Not if I see you first, Doug!" (Mocks the fake laugh.) I gotta tell you, I don't like Work Chandler. Okay? The guy's a suck-up.
Rachel: Come on, this isnt funny. She thinks its my fault that you havent called her. You have to call her!
Phoebe: (To Joey) Maybe its something you ate?
Rachel: Okay honey, you can finish this later were gonna be late. We gotta go.
Phoebe: (scared) Fire alarm? (She opens the door to reveal a fireman holding the blanket with the smoke detector.) Oh! Hi, officerfireman, can-can I help you?
Monica: Boy, I know they say you can't change your parents,... boy, if you could- (To Ross) -I'd want yours.