words in movies
Chandler: Okay, she is the star of the play. And she is my girlfriend! I get to have sex with the star of the play!
Phoebe: Personal shopping? What is that? Like where you walk around with snooty rich people and tell them what to buy?
Monica: If you have the big apartment you have to deal with people coming over all the time. That fridge has got to be stocked, okay, thats your department now. (She takes back the turkey leg)
Ross: Well, Kathy gets half-naked and simulates sex with a real good lookin guy.
Joey: Chandler, look theyre actors. Theyre there to do a job, just cause they work together, doesnt mean theyre gonna get together. I mean just cause it happened with Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins, it doesnt mean its gonna happen with them.
Chandler: So uh, man, are you gonna go to the play with me tonight?
Joshua: Anyway, she burned all of my clothes. I got away with two things. This suit and what turned out to be a skirt.
Chandler: Oh, I loved the play. You were great, and Nick ditto. Clearly youre having sex with him.
Kathy: Clearly, Im having sex with him?
Monica: All right then, when Im done with this place, its gonna be ten times better than that place!
Chandler: Steps! (He opens the door to his apartment to Ross and Joey looking at the new Playboy) Slut! (Ross and Joey quickly hide the Playboy behind their backs. Chandler wonders into the girls apartment.) You will all be very happy to hear that Kathy is sleeping with that guy!
Rachel: Whoops. (Starts to go into Chandler and Joeys.) Oh, hey, do you need help with that?
Rachel: So I was with Joshua for an hour today, and he has not asked me out. Its just so frustrating!
Chandler: Well y'know, what if she didnt actually sleep with the guy?
Chandler: Thats not backing me up! Look, you said with the off-stage and the heat, and the onstage and the oy heat.
Rachel: Would you like to go to a basketball game with me? (Tries again.) You know, its funny, basketball, because I happen to have tickets too (Tries again.) Umm, who likes the Knicks(Joshua comes in from the dressing room.)
Joshua: Thanks. (He starts to leave) Maybe Ill see in the spring, with the uh, yknow, for the uh, bathing suits.
Chandler: Well, she wasnt sleeping with him.
Chandler: Im saying that she is a devil woman! Yknow I mean you think you know someone and then they turn around and they sleep with Nick! Nick, with his rock hard pecs, and his giant man-nipples! I hate him, I hate her! Well, I dont hate her, I love her. This is all my fault really.
Chandler: Because, I-I shouldve called! Yknow if I had just called her after our big, stupid fight, she never wouldve gone out with Nick, and they wouldve ended up in bed together. I threw her at his man nipples!
Rachel: Honey, this is not your fault, just because you guys had a fight, it does not justify her sleeping with someone.
Rachel: Yes! I will! Absolutely! (She takes out his license and her license and holds them face to face with each other. She then proceeds to act like Dark Helmut in Spaceballs, and mimic a conversation between the two of them.) Hello, Rachel. Hi, Joshua. I left my wallet here on purpose. Really? Yes, I just wanted to see you again. Oh, Im glad. Rachel, Id like to say something to you. Yes? How you doin?
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's apartment.� Three pizza crusts, two bottle caps and the plastic tripod are left in the otherwise empty pizza box.� Mike is making hollow popping noises with his mouth.� He begins to speak, but stops and pops his lips a few more times and takes a drink.� Ross smiles as if he has thought of something to say, but then he stops and sinks back in a slump on the sofa.]
[Scene: Chandler's hotel room, he's sitting there with Joey who's talking about his helmet and running his hand through that feathery thing at the top.]
Phoebe: Nothing, there's nothing wrong with you.
Ross: Ah, the heart of every healthy relationship. Honesty, respect, and sex with celebrities.
Rachel: Yeah, well Bettys kinda sad. Which is why I believe I can lure her away with these chocolates. (Holding up the box of chocolates.) Now, while I distract her, you get in the office.
Monica: Oh. Well, I didn't realize that you needed it back right away. I mean, you told me to go and be a caterer. So I went. I beed. I mean, I... I used it to buy all this stuff. But lookI've got another job tomorrow, so I'll pay you back with the money I make from that.
Chandler: This is exactly the kind of social situation that I am not comfortable with!
Chandler: Oh well, this was a really important experience for me, and I wanted to share it with you.
Chandler: So tell me, how do- how do you think your husband would feel about you sitting here with me?...Sliding your foot so far up my pant leg you can count the change in my pocket?
Rachel: (sitting at a table with some of her friends) (to waitress) Oh, um, no, no, no, no excuse me, hello. Hi. My friend ordered an onion, not an olive, and uh I ordered a rum and Diet Coke, which I dont think this is.
MONICA: Well, he told me he was going out with the guys, I just didn't know that you were the guys.
Monica: Alright, let me ask you this question: How many of you thought the music was fine, but not in keeping with the tone of the restaurant? (a few raise their hands again).
Phoebe: No, I'm just gonna help him, you know, get 'de-Ursula-ized', like you know, like I did for Joey after he went out with her.
<Amy bending over fiddling with her purse when Emma cries and she hears Emma>
MIKE: I'll get it.� (He lunges across Ross's lap on the sofa to reach the phone.� Ross stares at him with wide eyes.)� Hello?� Ross's place.� Mike speaking.� (pause.� Hands phone to Ross)� It's for you.
Monica: Well, you broke up with Julie Grath! How much weight could she have gained?
(Chandler tries to come up with a good answer.)
Waiters: (with birthday cake, singing) Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear �
SUSIE: It's nice to see you're not still wearing that denim cap with all the little mirrors on it.
Phoebe: (getting up) Oh, for god�s sake, Judy, pick up the sock! Pick up the sock! Pick up the sock! (everybody scared) I�m sorry, was that rude? Di-did my, my li-little outburst blunt (?) the hideousness (?) that is this evening? Look, I know, you all have a lot going on, but all I wanted to do was have dinner with my friends on my birthday. And you are all so late and you didn�t even have the courtesy to call. (her cellular rings) Well, it�s too late now.
Rachel: (entering, with a guy) Hi guys! This is Josh. Josh, these are my friends, and that's Ross.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is on her dinner date with Joshua.]
Joey: Yeah, but, Ross, I mean, you're not okay with it.
Ross: My first time with Carol was... (He mumbles the last part)
[Scene: A Street, Phoebe is walking along with the diplomat (Sergei) and his translator (Mischa).]
Phoebe: Me taking care of you is no problem, huh? You guys feel safe. Right? Okay, Im gonna take that spit bubble as, "Yeah, I do!" Okay, after I get rid of this dirty diaper Leslie, Ill set you up with a clean one. (She throws it at the garbage without looking, misses, and knocks over a vase and flowers, which fall to the floor and break.) Okay, Im sorry. I didnt mean to scare you. I just have to clean that up. Okay? Cause lets face it, were at Monicas. (She crawls over, disposes of the diaper, picks up the flowers, and the vase.) I broke it. All right. Well, thats just the way that goes. (She throws out both the flowers and the vase.) Okay, good. (She turns around and only counts two babies.) Why are there only two of you? Where is Leslie? Well, you cant answer. (She starts looking for her) Leslie? Where are you Leslie? Leslie, now would be a good time for your first words! (She turns around and finds that Leslie has managed to crawl into the bottom drawer of the TV cabinet.) Well, look at you! Hey! You are a little bit mischievous! My gosh! (She picks her up and notices a surprise is waiting in the drawer.) Oh, youre a lot mischievous! Well, itll dry. (Closes the drawer with her foot.) (To Leslie) Okay, you sit with your brother and sister nowwho arent there! (They both have disappeared as well.)
[Scene: The desert outside of Las Vegas, Joey is arriving and we hear the song, Name. Y'know, (singing) I've been through the desert on a horse with no name! It felt good to be out of the rain. In the desert, you can't remember your name, 'cause there ain't no one for to give you no pain. La la la-la-la, la, la, la, la-la-la. You get the idea. Anyhoo, he pulls up and stops. As he gets out of the car, he spills a huge pill of fast food containers out of the foot well.]
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachel is meeting with Mr. Posner, Mrs. Lynch, and Joanna the hiring committee.]
(Woman with huge breasts cuts across them. Takes Joey's coffee)
Chandler: How was your date with Joey?
Chandler: I don't know. Maybe he hooked up with that hot girl he was talking to.
Monica: What is the matter with you?! Do you want to fall into the trap? Do you want to fall into the trap?!
Monica: You wanna fool around with Joey?
Phoebe: (Also gets up and starts taking her purse) Oh my God. Was Mike with him?
Monica: Why don't you just be straight with her? Tell her the truth.
Monica: Okay, we'll start with the building. You guys take the first and second floor, Phoebe and I'll take third and fourth.
Joey: my god woman! How many people do you have to had been with not to remember any of this?
RACHEL: Oh honey, are you jealous of Paolo? Oh, c'mon, I'm so much happier with you than I ever was with him.
Joey: I don't know, I just always pictured you ending up with one of those tall, smart blond guys, name like.... Hoyt.
Phoebe: So! Ross doesnt really decorate his tree with floss, but you dont hear him complaining do you? God! (Phoebe hits her guitar which wakes up Ross with a start.)
Ross: Oh wow! I mean, wow! I mean, I-I-I think shes cute but I-I would never have thought of going out with her, never!
Joey: No-no-no, I think Im gonna see how things go with Kathy. Shes pretty cool.
PHOEBE: I'm almost done with it, keep your panties on.
(The camera cuts to Wayne whos busy making out with Sarah and rubbing C.H.E.E.S.E.s controller on her back causing C.H.E.E.S.E. to go crazy. Joey starts throwing books at C.H.E.E.S.E. to get him to stop.)
Phoebe: Okay. And, my, dead, mother, says, you, are, it. I'm with Rachel.
(Finally, Monica with her parents on her arms start down the aisle.)
Joey: You're driving me crazy with that!
Ross: Oh well, I guess Ill catch up with her later.
Amy: Thank you! So, can I stay with you?
Eric: Well if I didnt have sex with you, I had sex with someone that looked an awful lot like
(Rachel runs over and answers the phone with the blender in hand.)
Rachel: Pheebs, this whole apartment thing is just a nightmare! Every place I can afford comes with a roommate who is a freak. I mean, look at this; (Points to one and starts to read it.) "Wanted. Female roommate, non-smoker, non-ugly." Its just, there is nothing! The citys full!
Rachel: I-I dont want your job. I-I dont. Ohh this is such a mistake. I did not make out with him. Nobody made out with him. I did not use my keycard yesterday. I dont even know how to use my keycard. (The elevator stops. Ralph steps on.)
Monica: Please? Please?! We just don't want to deal with telling everyone, okay? Just promise you won't tell.
Chandler: I think you should go back with Gary. I dont wanna be the guy that breaks up a family, y'know when my parents split up, it was because of that guy. Whenever I would see him I was always think y'know Youre the reason, you are the reason why their not together. and I hated that guy. And it didnt matter how nice he was, or how happy he made my Dad.
Rachel: I can't believe this. All I wanted to do was help you try to figure out what to do with your life and this is how you repay me?
[Scene: Another Waiting Room, Phoebe and Joey are trying to find out where the guy with the broken leg is.]
Chandler: (entering with Joey) (to Monica) Coffee house?
Rachel: That's right! 'Cause that would give him the control! So now he's all ooh, coming up with this whole I've got a party thing y'know, trying to get me to hint around for an invitation. Blew up in his face, didn't it?
Phoebe: Yeah thats right Chandler does still think Im pregnant. He hasnt asked me how Im feeling or offered to carry my bags. Boy, I feel bad for the woman who ends up with him. (Monica looks at her.) After you of course.
Ross: (taping Joey with the cam) Hey, there is uncle Joey!
Phoebe: Oh, hi Chandler. It's Phoebe. Uhm... I know that Monica is working today so...(back to Central Perk) ...I was wondering if you want to come to the movies with me and Rachel.
Ticket Counter Attendant: Are you travelling with a child?
Benjamin: Break up with Charlie!
Joey: Listen, do you guys think I have a chance with Janine?
Joanna: Oh great! Ill keep it in my butt with your nose. (She grabs the cookie and walks out.)
[Cut to the Jetway, the flight attendant enters, walks past Ross, and approaches an older man with his wife who is also wearing a blue jacket.]
Mark: Sure, sure. (To Ross) What's with the chair. (Rachel signals him not to mention she's been fired)
Paul: (entering) Here you go honey. One Diet Coke with ice.
Monica: All right. Umm, you could uh start out with a little 1, a 2, a 1-2-3, 3, 5, a 4, a 3-2, 2, a 2-4-6, 2-4-6, 4, (Rachel starts getting worked up) 2, 2, 4-7, 5-7, 6-7, 7, 7.. 7 7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7 (mouths 7)! (They both lean back on the couch satisfied.)
Chandler: Yeah, I miss that too. I tell you what; from now on well make time to hang out with each other.
Chandler: (The room is filled with flowers and a floral print sheet on the bed.) Oh my God. What is th its like a guy never lived in here. Look, youve got to be careful. This girl thing is dangerous. (Looking around the living room.) Its spreading already.
Rachel: Oh its all right. Im guess Im just done with the whole dating thing. Its one more thing in my life thats suddenly completely different. This is hard.
Joey: Okay wait-wait p-please be cool! Okay? I work with this woman.
Phoebe: I dunno, lets see! So, okay, I dreamt that we were gonna get married, and he left, becuz he had to go fight a fire. And, um, so okay, I went to a night club, and I saw him making out with a girl.
(Chandler turns to watch her go and then sees Ross and Joey both with huge grimaces on their faces.)
ROSS: No. Man I don't wanna have to have Joey with me every time I wanna descent cup of coffee. Ya know, and I don't wanna spend the rest of my life drinking cappucino with a 'K'. I say you and I go back down there and stand up to those guys.
Mona: (entering, with her date) I am so sorry I spilled wine all over your shirt.
(They run down the street with Ross and Rachel following right behind them.)
Laura: Are you friends with him?
ROSS: The point is I... I don't need this right now, OK. It, it's too late, I'm with somebody else, I'm happy. This ship has sailed.
(Monica Enters. Chandler is in the kitchen with his laptop)
Chandler: With Roger? (Monica shyly looks away.) Not just with Roger?! (Monica shrugs.) Oh my God!
Chandler: And you're thinking of taking it? (Pause) So before you said being me with me was more important than any job, but I guess now it's old job, (Raises his hand) me, (Raises his hand) new job.
Chandler: Hey, y'know, I have had it with you guys and your cancer and your emphysema and your heart disease. The bottom line is, smoking is cool, and you know it.
Phoebe: Are you asking me out? Cause it would be kinda weird since you just broke up with my sister.
Monica: The Way You Look Tonight is on here! Dance with me?
Monica: Okay, just wait, please. I promise we'll come up with something. Just give us a little more time.
Phoebe: Hey! (Jumps on the bed with him.) Can we pick up where we left off?
JOEY: Let me get this straight. He got you to beg to sleep with him, he got you to say he never has to call you again, and he got you thinking this was a great idea.
Chandler: All right, I'd say we make a pact. Neither of us will go out with Missy Goldberg.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross is relating his recent conversation with Emily to the gang.]
Ross: Yeah, yeah, what's with the trophy!
Joey: Hey Ross, listen, you know that right now, your baby's only this big? (measures about 2 inches with his thumb and index finger) This is your baby. (in baby-like voice) Hi Daddy!
Rachel: When Carol was pregnant with Ben
Rachel: (to Joanne) So what's going on with you?
Rachel: Or...I could call in sick and not deal with it at all...
Chandler: All right, think about it. Now remember when you were going out with that girl Donna and you guys broke up. Remember how horrible it was when you guys bumped into each other at the supermarket?
Monica: Good! Now I need you to be careful and efficient. And remember, if I am harsh with you, it is only because you are doing it wrong.
Joey: (entering, with his grandmother) Hey everybody, look who's here! You remember my grandmother!