words in movies
Monica: It was, it was really nice. We started talking and I-I ended up having lunch with him.
Phoebe: Ooh! So now why can't we tell Chandler?
Monica: For this weekend! Oh gosh, it would be perfect, we get to see Joey plus we get to start our anniversary celebration on the plane. We can call it out plane-aversary.
Chandler: Do we have to?
Monica: Oh, he just doesn't want us to go through any trouble. Think of how excited he'll be when we go out and surprise him! Plus we get to have our own, ani-Vegas-ary! A-Nevadaversary!
Chandler: Yeah, I think we should see other people.
Monica: But we can go, right?
Monica: Oh that's okay. Dont worry about it, you can give it to me when we get back.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is coming out of the bathroom after a shower wearing only her bath robe, walks into the kitchen, and opens the fridge. As she bends over to grab a bottle of wine, her robe falls open (Damn this network primetime programming, we didn't see anything!) and she quickly closes it again. But then realizes she didn't have to do that. So she closes the fridge and stands next to the table, thinks about it for a little while and ]
Rachel: (takes off her robe) Oh! Look what happened! {Don't get your hopes up guys, we only get to see her from the back or from the neck up. Its times like these I wish that the networks would broadcast some nudity other than Denis Franz's butt.} (In her head.) Huh, check me out! I'm in my kitchen naked! I'm picking up an orange. (Does so) I'm naked! (Goes into the living room) Lighting the candles, naked, and carefully. (She backs anything that might have a point like a candle on her body away.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the scene is continued from where we left off before the break.]
Ross: Can we, can we just forget this ever happened?
Rachel: Okay. Oh wait! One more thing umm, do-do we still need to uh settle the question of "us?"
[Scene: Las Vegas, we have the typical glamour shots of Vegas, the Strip, slot machines, a couple other gaming tables all set to the tune of you guessed it, Money. Anyhoo, we finally get through that and watch Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe enter Caesar's Palace carrying their luggage.]
Joey: Uhh, because I'm shooting a scene right now. Yeah, I uh, I play a gladiator. Uh, y'know what? Hold-hold on a second. (To no one in particular) Can we cut? Yeah, my-my friends are here, I'm gonna take a little break.
Chandler: No-no, that's okay, apparently there's a new policy where we don't have to share everything with everybody.
Joey: Aww, there we go.
[Scene: That same plane cabin, Ross is working on a crossword puzzle and Rachel is asleep against his shoulder. She shifts a little bit and Ross suddenly gets an idea. An evil idea when he looks at his pen. Then we have a little time lapse, the plane has landed and everyone is disembarking. The flight attendant is saying bye-bye to everyone.]
(Rachel approaches and we see the fruits of Ross's evil plan. He has drawn a moustache and beard on Rachel. The flight attendant just ignores it.)
Ross: (on the phone) Yes, hello. I have a question. Umm, I used your pen to draw on my friend's face. (Listens) A beard and a moustache. (Listens and laughs) Thank you. (Rachel turns around and glares at him.) No, she didn't think so. (Listens) I know it's like (turns and sees Rachel staring at him and quickly changes the subject) anyway, umm well make-up didn't cover it and we've tried everything to get it off and nothing's worked. What-what do we do? (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Uh-huh. (Listens) Yeah. (Listens) Oh! Okay. (Listens) Okay, thank you! (Rachel gets excited at his tone.) (Hangs up the phone) Yeah, it's not coming off.
Monica: We have one.
Joey: Okay, so what are we going to do about this hand twin thing?!
Joey: Look, you and I have been given a gift. Okay? We have to do something with it. Like-like, hand modeling! Huh? Or-or magic! And you know NASA's gonna wanna talk to us!
Joey: (stopping him) Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa-whoa! We could have our own show! Y'know we could clap our hands together people will love it! Huh? And-and-and I wrote a song for us! (Singing, to the tune of This Land is Your Land) This hand is your hand! This hand is my hand! Oh wait, that's your hand! No wait, it's my hand!
Ross: (gets up) All right. Y'know what? We dont have to go downstairs! We can bring Vegas up to us! (He grabs a deck of cards and pulls up a chair.) All right, come on, come on, we'll play some blackjack. Here we go. (Deals the cards.) 13.
Ross: (does so) Oohh, 23. (Rachel looks at him.) Which is what we play to at this casino! You win 10 dollars! (Holds out a ten.)
Chandler: If you get this one, we buy everybody here a steak dinner!
Monica: (To Chandler) We're not really gonna buy these people steak dinners are we?
Chandler: Thank you, Mister Drunken Gambler! Okay, you get this and uh, we get the biggest suite in the place! (Everyone cheers) Wait-wait-wait-wait! We (motions to Monica and him.) get the biggest suite in the place.
Chandler: (sees the roll) Yes!! I love you! I can't even remember what we were fighting about!
Monica: Hard 8?! We should call it easy 8!
Chandler: Okay, okay, I tell you what. You roll another hard eight; (pause) and we get married here tonight.
Chandler: You roll another hard eight and we get married here tonight.
Chandler: Okay, so if an eight comes up, we take it as a sign and we do it! {Whoa! Where have I heard that before? Matthew Perry talking about signs in Las Vegas. I guess it must've been some movie I saw.} What do you say?
Phoebe: What time? Maybe we can share a cab!
Ross: (runs out of cards) We need more cards.
Rachel: Yeah, and also we need more umm, drinks. Hold on a second. (Gets up but stumbles a little bit.) Whup, okay. (She makes it to the phone and picks it up, without dialing.) Hello! Vegas? Yeah, we would like some more alcohol, and y'know what else? We would like some more beers. Hello? Ohh, I forgot to dial!
[Scene: The slot machines, we see some guy not having any luck. Both Phoebe and the Lurker are lurking him and each stick their heads around the corner at different times This is all set to that Pink Panther song. Finally the guy gives up and walks past the lurker's position, thus giving her the advantage. She scurries in and quickly drops a coin in the slot before Phoebe gets there. Phoebe arrives slightly later and pulls the arm just after the lurker deposits the coin and wins.]
Phoebe: How about we talk about this over dinner?
Monica: No-no-no! We need something old!
Monica: Okay, now we just need something borrowed!
Monica: Yep, we wanna get married!
Richard: So Monica let me ask you a question. Yknow, since we broke up do you ever, think about me?
Ross: Oh no-no-no, were just two people who happen to run into each other here at the coffee house. (He winks at her.)
Chandler: I dont care, this is our apartment! And they stoleyou stole itour apartment, and we won that apartment fair and square, twice! And I am getting it back right now. Im getting back right now!
Joey: (To Ross) I think we gotta end the freeze out.
Joey: Whoah, boy, hockey was a big mistake! There was a whole bunch of stuff we could've done tonight!
Chandler: Hey, we haven't been on a second date, she needs to hear me pee?
Chandler: So... Oklahoma is a crazy place. You know, they call it the Sooner state. Frankly I'd sooner be in any other state. (Monica looks at Phoebe, who also doesn't know what to say.) And what's with Oklahoma having a pan handle? Can all states have stuff like that? Hey yeah, I'm from the waistband, Wyoming. But when I was seven, we headed over to the crotch.
Chandler: Well, here we are, just a bunch of thirty year olds.
(We see Joey who has puffed up his cheeks and Chandler nonchalantly reaches down and pinches Joeys nose shut. In a few seconds, Joey has to move because hes now forced to actually hold his breath.)
CHANDLER: Well, I'm, I'm sorry...[Eddie forces his head in the door] Ahhh. Have we met?
Joey: And-and-and-and-and-and, and were gonna be friends again!
Chandler: Oh, and Sheena Easton. But we probably couldn't get her anyway.
Judy: (to Monica) I remember your first birthday! Ross was jealous of all the attention we were giving you. He pulled on his testicles so hard! We had to take him to the emergency room! Ross: (pointing the camcorder at himself) There's something you didn't know about your dad!
Phoebe: Oh, I'm sorry, oh, I just, I thought we could have them whipped and then add some peas and onions.
Rachel: (simultaneously as Ross) No, I dont think well be doing that.
Ray: Uh Joey, didnt your agents give you the revised rules? Weve eliminated all of that. No wheel, no cards.
Phoebe: Yep, we shook on it. Yeah but believe me that is not how he wanted to seal the deal.
Melissa: Well, weve been flirting back and forth, but I was hoping that tonight it would turn into something a little more than that.
Rachel: (Brings Joey a mug of coffee) Okay, here we go...
The Director: Im sorry Joey, as long as hes here and hes conscious were still shooting.
Joey: Wha? Wha..aa? Let me get the father. Hey, we need a father over here! We need a father!
Mike: (popping by, smiling) You're kidding, we wouldn't have missed it!
Joey: Its the big night! We wanted to wish you good luck!
Joey: Well, I'm feeling really insecure about the one we are shooting tomorrow...
Ross: Hey there little fella! Hey, uh-hey, why dont we get some shoes on ya, huh? Hey, why dont you show dad how you can put your shoes on, in your room! Yay!!
FBOB: [pulls out a flask] Whattaya say we make these, uh, coffees Irish?
Phoebe: Maybe we have the flight-number wrong. God.
MONICA: Fortunately, it is me. And, they made me head of purchasing, thank you very much. Anyway, I just ran into Ross and Chandler downstairs, and they think we should go out and celebrate. You know, someplace nice.
Chandler: Yes, yes, we did, thanks to Vidal Buffay.
Monica: Y'know what, I think we should play a game. I mean come on, its been twelve years.
Rachel: I mean, we are way past the fling thing, I mean, I am feeling things that I've only read about in Danielle Steele books, you know? I mean, when I'm with him, I'm totally, totally...
Monica: Ok, right about now the turkey should be crispy on the outside, juicy on the inside. Why are we standing here?
Chandler: We will take a moonlit walk on the Rue de la (mumbles something).
Chandler: Well you wouldn't, but we own the paper, we can print whatever we want.
Monica: Rach! We werent gonna miss our friends getting married!
Robin: (starting to cry) Ooh, (to Rachel) Can I have a napkin, please? Could you please hand me a napkin? (Rachel tries to grab one, but is to slow for his tastes.) Would you--Give me this thing (grabs the napkin holder from her.) all right!! Enough! (to Billy) And you are no longer my friend! We are finished! (gets up to leave) Nada!! No more! You are a bastard for doing this!! (Billy follows him) Get away from me!!
PHOEBE: There we go.You know what, if we were in prison, you guys would be, like, my bitches.
Joey: This is how much we pay for electric?!!!
Joey (checks the refrigerator): Okay, let's see, we got strained peas, strained carrots... Ooh! Strained plums. We haven't tried that yet.
Ross: (To Joey) I know, I wasnt finished. (Joey motions him to finish.) (Yelling at the street) But dont worry! Were gonna go down the fire escape!!
Joey: All right!! Okay, it was like four years ago. Okay, Ginger and I had gone out a few times, and then this one weekend, we went up to her Dads cabin. Just me, her, and her annoying little dog Pepper. Well that night, I cooked this really romantic dinner....
Chandler: Forty-five minutes? We have tickets to the Musicman at 8:00.
Mr. Geller: We started saving again when you were dating Richard and then that went to hell, so we redid the kitchen.
Chandler: Oh God! What was it? The thing that we hardly ever do or the thing we never do?
Rachel: Oh no-no-no-no-no, no, no! We, you with someone and me with someone.
Chandler: I know, me too. Hey! Y'know what if we went away for a whole weekend? Y'know we'd have no interruptions and we could be naked the entire time.
RICHARD: What're we looking at? That blue freckle?
Joey: Hey, yeah! Then we could do that telephone thing! Y'know, you have a can, we have a can and it's connected by a string!
Chandler: Relax! We just get her some antacids.
Joey: (there's a gunshot on TV) There's my scene, there's my scene. [Joey on tv] "Mrs. Wallace, I'm Dr. Drake Ramoray, your sister's neurosurgeon. I'm afraid the situation is much worse than we expected. Your sister is suffering from a..." (Does the smell-the-fart look.)
RACHEL: [on phone] Hi, Mr. Treeger. Hi, it's Rachel Green from upstairs. Yes, somebody, uh, broke our knob on the radiator and it's really hot in here. Yes, it's, it's hot enough to bake cookies. Well, do you think we could have a new one by 6? Wha t, no, no, Tuesday, we can't wait until Tuesday, we're having a party tonight.
Chandler: She was.... But y'know what, just in case, maybe we should come up with a set of ground rules.
Joey: Uh, theyre like my best friends. Are you saying we cant hang out with them? Cause that would kinda be a problem.
Frank: Yeah, I was thinking that maybe we could go down to Time Square and pick up some ninja stars. And, oh, um, my friend Larry, he wants me to take a picture of a hooker.
Rachel: Well, were a little early, the lecture doesnt end for 15 minutes.
Rachel: Well, yeah, right, yknow what? Yeah, youre right, I mean, we no, we have our fun. Yeah! But if (Grunts uncomprehensively) I mean, I mean like craaaazy! Yknow? Okay, all right. This is gonna, this is gonna sound yknow, a little umm, hasty, but uh, just go with it. Umm. Ugh. What if we got married?
Monica: Of course we will, come on we gotta make dinner.
Joey: Well, safer. Y'know, I mean I never start reading The Shining, without making sure weve got plenty of room in the freezer, y'know.
Chandler: Hi! Listen, can we watch cartoons on your television? We need a porn break. We spent the last two hours watching In & Out & In, Again.
Ross: Oh, better, actually. Y'know I-I-I think I finally figured out why we were having so much trouble lately.
Ross: So do we!! So do we!! (Ross notices a couple has been staring at them.) Im sorry you had to see that.
Phoebe: Oh yeah! Yeah, no, were gonna connect, y'know bond, and everything.
Ross: (concluding his speech)... in a very real way we can bring the Mesozoic era into the 21st century. (pauses) Thank you!
Ross: We have 8:00 reservations at Grammercy Bistero.
Frank: See the thing is umm, were not able to yknow, uh, conceive.
Phoebe: Oh, look what we almost left. (Picks up a coffee maker)
Joey: I'm so bored! Stupid rain, we... we can't do anything.
Phoebe: Yes. Definitely! Yes! Let's live in an apartment that we both live in! (Hugs him.)
Chandler: I don't know. Maybe we can open this up somehow.
Rachel: I know, it's huge, and it's scary, and it's... really far, far away from you guys, but this is such an incredible opportunity for me. And I've already talked to them about our situation with Emma, and they said they'll do whatever we need to make us feel comfortable.
Charlie: No, no, we ended up in great terms. I mean, if anything, I think this could help you. You know what? Why don't we all go out to dinner together, and I can introduce you.
(We see through the big window from the outside and see that Monica and Rachel have pictures of their faces pasted onto cardboard cutouts of Pamela Anderson and Yasmine Bleeth wearing their Baywatch swimsuits.)
Monica: (as Rachel) Um, okay. You just called a little while ago about needing a signature on the admissions form. Well, it turns out we need a whole new one (little laugh) because uh, you see, I-I, I put the wrong name again. (Little laugh) 'cause um...
Chandler: What's with the word y'all? You know, just... two words just... pushed together... Are we all allowed to do that, because if so, I say why stop there? You know, your new poodle could be your noodle. And fried chicken? Could be fricken.Waiter, waiter excuse me, I'll have the fricken? (Monica laughs) See, that's... that's funny with the fricken, right?
Rachel: Oh Phoebe, listen. Well, I think we gotta go. This place is really freaking me out. I've been watching this guy over there, I don't think he came with a kid!
Joey: We've been stood up. (sniffles) And we want our free crab cakes.
Chandler: All right, wait! Come on! Just wait one second! There has to be something that I can do! Something! If we still had that entertainment unit I would get in it for six hours and think about how I let you down. (Joey looks intrigued) What?
Chandler: You know what? You know what? I think we're making too big a deal out of this. ok? So we pay our bills a little late this month and maybe next month we cut back on a few things. And maybe we start eating out of Joey's refrigerator for a change. You're chef... what can you make out of backing soda and beer?
Chandler: Hey, you know what I was thinking? When we get married, are you gonna change your last name to Bing?
Chandler: We used to be married, but then we missed a weekend away together and things kind of unraveled. Because of you! Happy Birthday. (Ross looks disappointed and switches the camcorder off)
Doctor: Yeah, it's here in the paperwork we got from the clinic in Ohio.
Rachel: Oh please, I hate packing, its closer to work, and we do have fun. Although, Im really gonna miss living with you.
JOEY: What're you gettin' so bent out of shape for, huh? It's not like we agreed to live together forever. We're not Bert and Ernie.
Monica: Okay listen, yknow when you move in Rachels room is gonna be empty, you wanna talk about what we want to do with it?
Rachel: Yeah and well drop it off downstairs so that were not tempted.
Alice: (Starting to cry) Oh, we have our babies.
Phoebe Sr: Ohh, well. Y'know we were always together, in fact the had a nickname for the three of us.
Phoebe: Thats ridiculous Rachel, we were all babies once. (Rachel looks at her.) Oh, you mean today.
Monica: Well, we thought we would all go to a picnic (Phoebe gasps), in Central Park!
Ross: All were saying is dont rush into anything.
Chandler: (jumping up) Hey! Phoebe! We can talk to Phoebe!!
Joey: Oh! Hey right! Not a problem. (He starts taking off his clothes.) I totally understand. You need to yknow make sure I dont have any horrible scars or tattoos. Dont you worry; I have nothing to hide. (He drops his pants and stands back up and looks down.) So there you go, thats me. (We cut to a camera angle looking at the casting director and movie director through Joeys legs.) One hundred percent natural! (Suddenly, theres a thud as something falls off.) (Everyone is shocked.) I tell ya, that has never happened before.
Phoebe: Na-uh, no, we are all responsible for our own babies.
Ross: Okay, relax, relax. We are gonna be here for a while, it looks like, and we still have boyfriends and your career to cover.
Robert: Oh God! Here we go again. Why does this keep happening to me? (spreads his legs) Is it something Im putting out there? Is this my fault? Or am I just nuts?
Rachel: (into the phone) No, there isn't time to go to the bakery. We're just gonna come home... Everybody left? Alright, well just tell Emma we're gonna be there as soon as we can. (emotionally) Bye...
Joey: Guys, do you think we should ask Ross to come along?
Phoebe: It really does how long do you think we have to stay?
Rachel: Listen yknow what sir? For the last time, I dont care what the computer says, we did not take a bag of Mashuga nuts from the mini-bar and we did not watch Dr. Do-Me-A-Little!
Rachel: No, it was a stupid bet! We were just playing a game!