words in movies
Monica: Guys, hurry up! The flight leaves in four hours! It could take time to get a taxi! There could be traffic! The plane could leave early! When we get to London, there could be a line at customs! Come on!! (She runs back to her apartment.)
Joey: Its all London, baby! Here we go. (He takes a picture of a less than enthused Chandler and starts towards the girls apartment.)
Ross: Well, were all here! I guess we should get going!
Ross: (to Rachel) So, were off.
Monica: All right, yknow what? We really are late! Lets go! Lets go! Lets go!!
Ross: Fine. Youll-youll watch it on video when we get back.
(And with that, television history is made as, for the first time ever, an entire show moves its entire production to an entirely different country to make a single episode. We get shots of Buckingham Palace, London Bridge, Big Ben, and the London Marriott as Joey and Chandler exit.)
Joey: Its London, baby! All right, the hotels here. (Points to the map.) Wait. No, we wanna go No. I know. (Sets the map down.) Im gonna have to go into the map. (So Joey literally steps into the map.)
Joey: I got it! (Picks up the map and starts walking.) Here we go.
Chandler: Okay. Listen-listen, were not gonna have to walk this way the entire time are we?
Emily: and that was all before 10 oclock. The caterer rang and said it was going to be Chicken Kiev instead of Chicken Tarragon. And then the florist phoned to say there arent any tulips. Oh, and the chilliest has carpel-tunel syndrome. Were not gonna be
Emily: (running in, with Ross) Oh. Oh my God. How can this be happening? What are we going to do?
Rachel: Oh, I dont know. I guess we have to eat.
Phoebe: We thought you knew!
Rachel: We?!
Phoebe: Yeah, we all know! We talk about it all the time!
Phoebe: Well, because we thought you knew!! Its so obvious! God, that would be like telling Monica, "Hey, you like things clean."
The Vendor: So, what are you guys in the market for? Weve got uh, scarves, tulip post cards...
Ross: Hey! I just spoke to your dad, and you know what? He seems to think well be able to find a new place for the wedding.
Emily: We dont have to.
Emily: No. But, Monica and I were talking, and-and I was so upset about the hall being knocked down, and she suggested that we put the wedding off for a bit.
Emily: She said, "If Im not gonna be happy getting married somewhere that we find in a day, well then we should just postpone it."
Emily: I realize that people are going to be disappointed. But, Im sure theyll come back when we can do it right.
Emily: Dont you point your pants at me! (She throws them on the floor.) We have no choice! Anywhere thats half-decent wouldve be booked months ago, Ross dont you understand? This is our wedding Im talking about.
Ross: The only thing I understand is; postponing it is not an option. This is when were getting married.
Emily: Its not the pants. Its you that is backwards. And if, and if you dont understand how important this is to me, well then, perhaps we shouldnt get married at all! (She storms out.)
Rachel: I can do that. I certainly did it when we were going out.
Phoebe: Okay. Umm, before we get started, I just wanna say for the record that I love Ross, I think hes such a great guy. Here. (Hands her the picture, Rachel grabs it out of her hand.) Okay, now, close your eyes. And imagine that youre with Ross okay and imagine that youre kissing him. And youre-youre running your hands all over his body. And then you run your hands through his hair, but eew-oh gross its some kind of grease, itsuck! Hah?
Monica: Emily has probably been planning it since she was five! Ever since the first time she took a pillowcase and hung it off the back of her head. Thats what we did! We dreamed about the perfect wedding, and the perfect place, with the perfect four-tiered wedding cake (Starting to cry), with the little people on top. (Ross gets thrown a box of Kleenex from the bathroom and he gives her one.) Thanks. But the most important part is that we had the perfect guy who understood just how important all that other stuff was.
Monica: Sometimes we were.
Joey: Yeah. (Pause) Hey, I hope Ross didnt think that we just went in there because we were uncomfortable being out here!
Phoebe: Yeah. But yknow we were thinking about you, yknow we ordered the Joey Special.
Ross: But-but, if you dont love this, well do it in any other place at any other time. Really, its fine, whatever you want.
Emily: Well then well get wet. (They kiss.)
Ross and Monica: Dad, dad. We got it!! We Got It!!!
Mr. Geller: Ohh forget it. Too hell with tradition, were happy to do it.
Mrs. Geller: We know how expensive weddings can be, besides this may be the only wedding we get to throw (patting Monica on the shoulder.).
Mrs. Waltham: This is ridiculous. I mean we had an agreement. (Ross looks frustrated. She begins to scream at her husband.) Will you say something, Steven?! Please!!!
Chandler: (Continuing his toast.) And Im sure were all very excited that Ross and Emily are getting married at Montgomery Hall. I mean to think, my friend getting married in Monty Hall. (No reaction from the people.) Ohh, come on!! Monty Hall!! Lets make a Deal!! Come on, you people!! All right, forget it!! Congratulations, Ross and Emily. (He sits down.)
Joey: Hey, best man number two, Joey Tribbiani. Now Im not good with the jokes like Chandler here. Boy...but ahh, I just want to say congratulation to the happy couple. I first met Ross in this coffee house back home...Home...New York City...Where everybody knows my name. Well anyway, I love you guys. (pointing at everyone.) But not as much as I love America. (Looking at Chandler.) Could we please..go home now?
Monica: Well, thanks, we like him.
Ross: Look, were down to just one point. Could we please, maybe just settle it after the wedding.
Rachel: Sure, you know what? Come on, well just tell them that there was like a problem with like the "engine".
Chandler: Yes...Yes..Uh-huh, You?(Looking over at her. She looks back.) We did you.
Phoebe: No! No, we have an emergency. Okay? Rachels coming to London.
Joey: Look weve got to find her. Phoebe just called!! Rachels coming to tell Ross she loves him!!
Joey: I know! Thats why we got to find Monica!! You know where she is?
Joey: (Whispering.) Pisst, Monica. Alright, we really need to start looking out for Rachel. Ill cover the front door. You watch that big hole at the back of the building and I got Chandler covering Ross.
Mrs. Geller: Theres nothing to discuss. Were not paying for your wine cellar.
Ross: You know what, I think weve had all the bad luck were going to have. (He hugs her.)
Chandler: What we did last night was....
Monica: What were we thinking?
Minister: Friends. Family. We are gathered to celebrate here today the joyous union of Ross and Emily. May the happiness we share with them today be with them always. Now Emily, repeat after me. I, Emily...
Chandler: Hey! Babe! Arent you excited were going on our honeymoon?
Phoebe: Yeah! Yknow, we were really huge too, but then they had to shut us down when Regina Philange died of alcohol poisoning.
Chandler: All guys that are awake. Then we go to sleep and then all the guys from the other end of the world wake up and behave the exact same way.
Mr. Geller: Honey, relationships are hard. Like with your Mom and me. You know after we graduated college we broke up for a while. It seems her Father, your Grandfather, wanted her to travel around Europe, like he did. Of course, he got to do it on Uncle Sam's nickel, because he was also strafing German troop trains at the time. However, (turns around and sees that Monica is sleeping and puts a blanket around her, kisses her, picks up the cigar, and starts watching the video)
CHANDLER: That's a good plan, Joe. Next time we wanna pick up women, we should just go to the park and make out. Taxi, taxi!
[Chandler is sitting in front of a window while it's raining outside. We see Joey through a rainy window. The camera zooms out to show it's just his tabletop water sculpture.]
Phoebe: Excuse me. Excuse me! (Mrs. Bukart stops singing) Thanks. Um, clearly this is a very, very hard time for you. Um, but, um, we provided a service, and we deserve to be paid because you ate that service, and, um, we are not leaving here until we're paid every penny. 'Cause you know what, lady? We're part time caterers, and we have no place else to go.
Joey: I should know that. Lets see, just one moment please. Umm, here we are, a Wicked Wango card determines whether you go higher or lower.
Ross: This is fun. Hey Rach, remember that whole "We were on a break thing?" Well, I'm sorry, will you marry me? (Laughs--whines as he sees that no one is laughing. They're just staring at him in shock.)
Joey: Yeah, hes the reason I didnt get that big Minute Maid commercial a couple of years ago remember? We were supposed to be brothers, but he messed it up.
Ross: Oh, I've gotten into the habit of calling Rachel "Mommy" when we're around Emma. Which I now realize we are not ...
Gary: Yeah, we took a little stroll in the park and no one was around, so
Phoebe: No, we were just laughing. You know, how laughter can be infectious.
Phoebe: But then we ditch those two and thats when we get married. Well have Chandlers money and Rachels kids and getting custody will be easy because of Rachels drinking problem.
Mr. Geller: Well I dont know, I-I suppose we may have favored you unconsciously, you were a medical marvel! The doctor said your mother could
Ross: No! But we-we didnt have sex-uh, did we? I mean, I dont remember much about last night, it was such a blur.
Assistant: You've got to face the red light. When the red light goes on the spraying is about to start so close your eyes. When the spraying stops, count to five. Pat yourself down to avoid drip marks then turn around so we can get your back. Got it?
Ross: We are four short of a bush-o (pause). God I feel so alive, I love being in the country!
Joey: Maybe, maybe we did a good thing, helping Ross get back on his feet!
[Scene: The lobby in Ross's building, we see a flyer that is on the bulletin board that reads, "Are you the Hot Girl who waved at me? If so, give me a call!" and it's signed, Joey 629-9*** (The last couple of numbers have been ripped off). Anyhoo, Ross is getting his mail.]
Chandler: What is the point of having them if we never use them?
RACHEL: Ok, we can do this now, can't we Ben? Yes we can, yes we can. [finishes the diaper] There. I did it. I did it. Look at that, oh, stays on and everything. Hi.
Joey: Hey! (stands up) As soon as it stops raining we have got to go snorkeling! Some kid told me about the sea turtle and, if you blow bubbles in its face, it chases ya! (smiles ecstatic)
Phoebe: Oh! Since tomorrow. I met this really cute guy in the park and he like y'know, jogs, and blades, and swims, and so y'know we made a deal thats hes going to teach me all sorts of jock stuff.
Chandler: I say we go with Careless Whisper.
ROSS: Yeah, that way I figure, ya know, we'll be far enough away from our parents that we don't have to see them all the time but close enough that they can come over and babysit whenever we want. And yes, I know, the taxes are a little higher than, let's say, Nassau county but the school system's supposedly great.
Rachel: Mon you definitely have to make it a theme wedding, and the theme could be, Look how much money weve got! Y'know, I mean you could put, you could put money in-in the invitations! You-you could have like little money place settings. And ah, you could start with a money salad! I mean itll be dry, but people will like it.
Amanda: (In a fake British accent) It's so nice to see you! Both of you! Look at me. Look how young I look! (gives her coat to Monica as well) Oh gosh! We have so much to catch up on! But first things first: touch my abs (at which point she grabs both Phoebe and Monica's hands and places them both on her stomach) I don't exercise at all! (she pulls them down to sit.) Oh gosh, so Monica, you're married!
RTST: No, ma'am. Well, anyhoo, we should be getting our F.D.A. approval any day now, hopefully, in time for Thanksgiving. See, the way we look at it, chocolate already dominates most of your major food-preparation holidays: Easter, Christmas, what have you.
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Yeah, hi! Mrs. Tribbiani? (Listens) Hi, this is Monica Geller. (Listens) Yeah Im just calling to say that Chandler and I uh, really hope you can make it to the wedding. Yeah, apparently a bunch of invitations that we sent werent delivered. Umm, I guess there was some screw up at the damn post office! (Joey nods his approval.) (Listens) T-Tell me about it! (Listens) Yeah, yeah, the US Post Office? No, more like US lost office! (Listens) What are they Irish?! (Joey gives her a thumbs up.)
Rachel: No, we decided that I would go ahead and set up first, and then my mom would bring Emma to Paris on Sunday.
Ross: Well, um, actually, I-I took her to the planetarium. Thats-thats where we had our first date. Um, she walked in and I had the room filled with lilies, her favorite flower
Rachel: Yeah well, not anymore I can't. He fired us! What are we gonna do? We have to find a pediatrician. Wait wait, Monica said that when you guys were growing up, you really liked your doctor. What was his name?
Chandler: Yes, God forbid we throw out old underwear. You-you know what? Im going to go over to Joeys.
Joey: Thata girl! Huh? We should get out of here; theres a new class comin in.
Whitney: We kinda need to talk.
Monica: We were, we were just in the storage area and we saw this really creepy man!
Woman: (looking through her peephole, we see Ross standing in the hallway.) Yesss?
Rachel: All right, look, we did not know that you wanted a stripper so we went to the phonebook and we got the first name we could find!
Ross: 'S'funny, um, uh, we agreed we'd spend the rest of our lives together. Things change, roll with the punches. I believe Julia's on the table..?
Chandler: Oh well, we dont because we got the other pl-place.
JADE: Hello, I'm looking for Bob. This is Jane. I don't know if you're still at this number, but I was just thinking about us, and how great it was, and, well, I know it's been three years, but, I was kinda hoping we could hook up again. I barely had t he nerve to make this call, so you know what I did?
Joey: Well I dont like to say it out loud, but, yeah! Dont feel bad man, we all have our strengths. Youre better with numbers and stuff.
Joey: Shhh! This is a museum, no talking. Right down here, (Motions to a fossilised dinosaur foot.) we have a large foot. (Sees Ross working in one of the display cases.) Uhh, and over here we have Ross Geller. (Knocks on the glass) Everyone wave Hi to Ross. Ross is one of our most important scientists, look at him, hard at work. (Ross does the old "Putting a cigarette in your ear and pulling it out of your mouth trick.") Okay, moving right along. Come on.
Joey: No-no-no-no-no, I saw an ad for this video, people climb that thing everyday! We could totally do that!
Rachel: I dont know, I dont know. Urrrgh! Look, maybe we should take a break.
Ross: Well, we just wanted to say a quick hi, and then we're gonna go see the baby.
(We can hear the dog whining at a high pitch.)
Rachel: Come on! We will be there for you the whole time! Just remember gal pal Rachel Green. (Excited) Ha-ha! Im gonna be in Soap Opera Digest! And not just in the dumb crossword puzzle. (Looks at Joey.) Seriously, proud of you.
Phoebe: We can't leave now! There was this one baby, Haley, who was favourite to win and she got croup, so she had to stay home! This competition just blew wide open, folks!
Joey: Ah!! Okay! Eyes open at all times! Oh, hey, how do we decide where we... (clears throat) y'know each would, (clears throat again) y'know (pause) be?
Ross: I.....got.....dressed. Really, really quickly. Okay, okay. (Rachel starts to follow Monica into her room, but Ross stops her and sends her back to her room.) There we go, there we go.
Monica: Ohh, of course we are! (They walk up to the elevators.) We left it up to fate. (Pushes the elevator button.) If we were supposed to get married there would be a clear-cut sign. (The elevator door opens to a priest reading from a bible with Chandler and Monica standing side-by-side holding each others hands.)
Ross: We were all pretty shaken up about it.
Janice: Oh! Youre right. Oh God. But, before I can say good-bye, theres something I really need you to know, Chandler. The way I feel about you, its like, I finally understand what Lionel Richies been singing about. Y'know, I mean what we have, its like movie love, youre my soulmate, and I cant believe were not going to be spending the rest of our lives together.
Joey: Hey Ross, wouldn't it be great if we could go two straight hours without dropping it?!
Issac: Okay, were not.
Chandler: (entering, very upset) Ok Tommy, that's enough mourning for you! Here we go, bye bye!! (he shoves him out the door)
Phoebe: Okay y'know what you have to choose. All right, if-if the most important thing on the planet to you is this cat poopy thing then, okay you can have Smelly Cat, but we wont be partners. So whats it gonna be?
Ross: (calls Julie back) Hi? Sorry, we got disconnected... (Walks away.)
Joanna: Oh God, we just clicked! Yknow how people just click? Like he came by to pick me up, and I opened the door, and it was just like, click! Did he tell you?
Mrs. Bing: Oh honey! This is so exciting! I thought we screwed you up so bad this day would never come. Oh and just think. Soon therell be lots of little Bings. (He freaks out and loosens the tie again.)
Monica: Well, we... (makes quotation signs in the air) "bore false witness"... See I could be a reverend.
Ross: Oh, we went to see a collection of Victorian doorknobs and the Cupert-Hewitt museum.
Phoebe: Me taking care of you is no problem, huh? You guys feel safe. Right? Okay, Im gonna take that spit bubble as, "Yeah, I do!" Okay, after I get rid of this dirty diaper Leslie, Ill set you up with a clean one. (She throws it at the garbage without looking, misses, and knocks over a vase and flowers, which fall to the floor and break.) Okay, Im sorry. I didnt mean to scare you. I just have to clean that up. Okay? Cause lets face it, were at Monicas. (She crawls over, disposes of the diaper, picks up the flowers, and the vase.) I broke it. All right. Well, thats just the way that goes. (She throws out both the flowers and the vase.) Okay, good. (She turns around and only counts two babies.) Why are there only two of you? Where is Leslie? Well, you cant answer. (She starts looking for her) Leslie? Where are you Leslie? Leslie, now would be a good time for your first words! (She turns around and finds that Leslie has managed to crawl into the bottom drawer of the TV cabinet.) Well, look at you! Hey! You are a little bit mischievous! My gosh! (She picks her up and notices a surprise is waiting in the drawer.) Oh, youre a lot mischievous! Well, itll dry. (Closes the drawer with her foot.) (To Leslie) Okay, you sit with your brother and sister nowwho arent there! (They both have disappeared as well.)
Chandler: Oh, just hanging out, talkin about uh, websites. (Joey laughs.) Yeah, we saw this really interesting website about marriage and how totally unnecessary it is and how its just a way for the government to keep tabs on you.
Gunther: And when you have a second later, I wanna show you why we dont just trap spiders under coffee mugs and leave them there.
Monica: The woman from the museum called and said that there was a cancellation and that we could move up our wedding and Chandler heard! (Phoebe gasps.) I know! How bad is this?!
Chandler: Look, forget it. We tried, but Phase Three is a lost cause, Okay? Those strippers were insanely hot, and I couldnt picture myself with any of them. (Sits back in disgust.)
Mona: No, no. Listen, Ross is too nice to say anything, but this is his apartment, and, and, we gotta have some boundaries, so why dont you go back to your place and give us some privacy?
Monica: Because they dont know were dating. (Again, trying to quickly change subjects.) Do you think we should eat in the kitchen? (Goes to the sink and the stove to cook.)
(Rachel does so and its one of those dance party shows they have during spring break and we see )
Phoebe: Now, we can kick anybodys ass!
(She walks down the aisle with the groomsman. We cut to inside Central Perk, where Phoebe and Chandler are waiting.)
Charity guy: Well if you like, we can include your names in our newsletter.
Phoebe: And also, we dont know what to do with this. (She turns on a switch and the girls nipples light up.)
Ross: (losing control, we hear him shout outside) MY SANDWICH?!!!
Prospective nanny: (in a sweet, caring voice) I think that's really smart. The easier we can make the transition for her, the better. (Ross and Rachel seem pleased with the answer.)
Rachel: Okay, come onJoey, Ill buy you a new one! All right? Well go down to the store right now and well-well get you a new chair.
Joey's Doctor: Kidney stones! Now, ordinarily Mr. Tribbiani, we try to break up the stones up with shock waves, but they're to close to the bladder now. Which means we can either wait for you to pass them or else go up the urethra
Chandler: Oh, we had a lot of liquor left over from the Christmas party.
Monica: Yeah, well you call her and tell her that yknow when we were kids her precious little Frannie tried to undress me several times, okay? And if I hadnt have stopped her, there probably wouldnt even be a wedding to go too.
Joey: (frustrated) Yes, all right? All of her hot dancer friends are gonna be there and theyre gonna be, be drinkin and dancin, and we really wanna go!
Ross: Here we come, walkin' down thethis doesn't smell like Mom's.
Chandler: Yeah, were gonna need to see that tape. (They rest of them agree.)
Monica: Ok people, we are back in business! (Gets her headset out of her purse) Oh God, we've missed you soo much! (takes all the notes from Phoebe) Ok, go and get your hair and make-up done, and I'll take care of everything.
Ross: Eh? Well show him!
Chandler: (excited) Guys, guys, I've got great news! Guess what Joey: Uh, ah, Monica's pregnant?! Monica: (shocked) Really? (She looks around, suddenly embarrassed) Let's get past the moment. Phoebe: What's your news? Chandler: Thank you. I got a job in advertising. (Everybody cheers) Monica: (hugging Chandler) Oh, honey, that's incredible! Phoebe: (inquisitive) Gosh, what's the pay like? (Everybody stares at her indignantly) Oh, come on people (defending) come on, now, if I don't know who makes the most, how do I know who I like the most! (She looks at Joey) Hey Joey! (Joey winks at her) Chandler: Actually, it pays nothing. It's an internship. Joey: Oh, that's cool. We have interns at 'Days Of Our Lives'. Chandler: Right. So, it'll be the same except less sex with you. (Joey nods) Ross: So, uh, what kinda stuff do you think they'll have you do there? Chandler: Well, it's a training program, but at the end, they hire the people they like. Phoebe: (enthusiastic) That's great. Chandler: Yeah, I mean, there's probably gonna be some ground work which will probably stink, you know, grown man getting people coffee is a little humiliating (At the same time, Gunther puts down a cup of coffee in front of Chandler) Chandler: (grinning awkwardly) Humiliating and noble! (Gunther shoots a nasty look at him while leaving) Ross: You know, if I didn't already have a job, I think, I would have been really good in advertising. Monica: Ross, you did not come up with "got milk?" Ross: Yes, I did, I did! (He turns to Joey, disappointed) I should have written it down!
Ross: Wait-wait-wait, do you, do you think, maybe we shouldnt invite her?
Chandler: Oh, we wanted to finish the crossword before we went to bed. Hey, do you know a six-letter word for red?
Monica: Maybe we could call the phone company. Maybe they could change the message. Maybe they can change his number.
Phoebe: (entering) Found the vest! I mean were gonna have to keep an eye on it, yknow make sure we dont lose it again
Ross: Oh right. Right. Ooh, remember the time I uh, I pinned you down and tickled you til you cried? (She laughs) Were probably too old to do that now.
Rachel: Then we took a walk down to Bendall's, and I told him not to, but he got me a little bottle of Chanel...
Billy Crystal: Im sorry. Ex-excuse us. Im sorry, its a little crowded. Do you mind if we... (motions to the couch)
Phoebe: Uh-hmm. Okay. Well then, could we reschedule? For say, Friday night perhaps at 8 oclock?
Phoebe: Good, but wait. Okay, all right, here we go. Now I want you to relax. Take a deep breath. Clear your mind. (Quickly) Which do you like better peanut butter or egg whites?
Chandler: I still dont get it, we didnt do anything wrong.
JOEY: Yes! Yeah, it's like they're always saying "let's go here, let's go there". Like we can afford to go here and there.
JOEY: Oh we flipped for it. I got the cigar, he got the moustache. Figured if we both grew it, we'd look like dorks.