words in movies
[Scene: Outside Central Perk, Rachel and Phoebe are helping Monica learn how to roller skate by rolling her between themselves.]
Rachel: So whos idea was it to put everybody in the diner on skates?
Phoebe: Yeah! Okay, here you go. (rolls her back to Rachel)
Chandler: Oh, so thats why the priest threw holy water on me. (theres no reaction from Joey) Okay, listen, you have to cheer up! Okay? You should come out with Ross and me, I mean anything is better than sitting around here crying all day about Kate.
Ross: Yeah! Theyre putting together this panel to talk about these fossils they just found in Peru and The Discovery Channels gonna film it!
Ross: Thanks. You ready to go?
Chandler: Yeah. (they start to leave)
Anchorwoman: (on TV) While most of us think of chocolate bunnies and baskets as traditional Easter gifts. Some people insist on giving live chicks as presents. (Joey is intrigued by the idea) Unfortunately, the sad fact remains that most of these little guys wont live to see the fourth of July. (Joey starts to call a place to buy a little baby chick) Because of as a result of improper care, they will be dead.
Monica: Hi! Hey, Pete youre back! Hey, check this out. (She starts to skate over to him)
(She gets just about all the way over to him and falls into his arms.)
(She starts to go and get the coffee and falls behind the counter.)
Pete: I bought a restaurant and I would like you to be the head chef.
Rachel: What a jerk! You want me to kick his ass?
Rachel: And youre still not attracted to him at all?
Rachel: Now that youre on youre own, youre free to look as stupid as you like.
Ross: (to Monica) You like it right?
Monica: Oh absolutely. I like it even more on you than I did on Colonel Sanders. (Ross starts to leave) Ross! Ross! Im kidding!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is talking to Phoebe about her suggestion.]
Chandler: So um, after you put the suggestion in the box, how long did it take for the roller skating thing to happen.
Joey: Oh, well no problem there. (He picks up the chick, hugs it really tight, and talks to it like its a little baby.)
[Scene: The Moondance Diner, Pete is talking to Monica about the restaurant.]
Monica: Okay. (she gets ready to go) Can you give me a little push?
Phoebe: (to Pete) Wow! Thats exciting, you went to Japan, made up a woman.
Phoebe: Cause youre still into Monica. So you told her there was somebody else so she would agree to work with you, so cause you figure oh if you spent a lot of time together, maybe something might happen, and...
Chandler: I dont know. (He picks the chick up and turns it over, trying to determine the sex of the chick, and blows on it.) I cant tell, what ever it was went back in too quickly.
Joey: Well, anyway, I got to go change, Im ah, meeting some of the cast for drinks.
Joey: Hey! Who was up from 2 oclock this morning until 5 oclock this morning trying to get her back to sleep?
Chandler: Yes, here it comes! Im stuck here all day, and then you come in and spend two seconds with us and then expect to go off gallivanting with your friends? Well I dont think so mister!
Joey: Hey!! I need to relax! Okay? I was working all day!
Joey: I dont know, maybe we werent ready to have a chick.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is trying to take some aspirin.]
Rachel: (She bends over to try and pick up the aspirin) Oww!
Rachel: Look, Im fine. Watch. (She picks up an aspirin between her toes) Look at that. (She lifts her leg to grab the aspirin with her hand and almost falls over.) Whoa-whoa!
Ross: (stopping her from falling) Okay, okay. Look, you have got to go to a doctor! Okay?
Rachel: No. I have got to get ready and go to a dinner at my bosses house. Its a very big deal, theres a lot of people there I have to meet.
Ross: And Im sure youre gonna make a big impression. Hi! Im Rachel Green. Its nice to meet you. (He lifts his leg and imitates shaking hands with it, just like how Rachel was trying to pick up the aspirin with her feet.) Come on, you probably have a broken rib!
Rachel: Well, I will go to the hospital tomorrow, itll still be broken then.
Chandler: (rushing in) Oh, good! Good! Do you guys know how to get a chick out of a VCR?!
[Scene: Rachels bedroom, Rachel is trying to put on eye liner with her left hand, as Ross is setting out her shoes.]
Ross: Sweep, sweep....(He starts to paint it on her eye, making it look like she has a black eye.)
Rachel: We dont want it-it to be too much, we want it to be subtle.
Phoebe: Ooh, I have to tell you something.
Monica: Okay, but wouldnt it be easier if you had to tell me something that you could tell me.
Phoebe: Well, sure in a perfect world. But, no, I promised I wouldnt tell, and I swore to like all my gods.
Monica: Okay. Does it have to do with Ross and Rachel?
Monica: Does it have to do with Joey?
Monica: Does it have to do with-with Chandler and that sock that he keeps by his bed?
Phoebe: No, but lets come back to that later!
Rachel: Sure, Ill just sit next to the trans-sexual from purchasing.
Rachel: I dont want you to see me naked!
Ross: All I have to do is close my eyes. See? (closes his eyes) Woo-hoo!!
Rachel: All right. (She starts to take off her robe) Fine.
Ross: Easy. Easy. You have to go to the hospital. Okay?
Ross: (He thinks about it) Of course I am. I just have to make a call.
Rachel: Thank you. (She goes to take off her make-up and screams in pain) Oww!!!! God!
Rachel: Im sorry, I just cant go to the hospital lookin like this.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is trying to find out what Phoebe wont tell her.]
Monica: Okay, I feel like Im talking to Lassie. All right, Phoebe would you just tell me!
Monica: Okay, does it involve something to do with Petes computer company?
Joey: (sees hes watching Baywatch) Ohhh. (sees he still has the chick) Ahh! What are you doing?! I thought you were gonna take her back to the store today.
Chandler: I did! But the store wouldnt take her back! So then I took her to the shelter, and you know what I found out?
(Joey wants to know, but Chandler doesnt want to discuss it by the chick, so he and Joey move over to the windows and away from the chick.)
Chandler: If they cant find a home for her, they kill her! And Im not gonna let that happen to little Yasmine!
(He hear a duck start quacking, and see it waddle into the living room from the bathroom. Joey wants to know whats with the duck.)
Pete: Look, the only who stands to get hurt is me. And Im okay with that.
Ross: (to Chandler) Thats a duck.
Chandler: Thats a bad duck!!! (to Ross) Howd the thing go tonight, Ross?
Chandler: (to the duck) Okay, now when you come back I hope you remember that, that chick is not a toy! (He goes back into the apartment)
[cut to inside Monica and Rachels]
Ross: I was kinda, supposed to be on TV tonight for The Discovery Channel.
Ross: Eh, cause I knew that if I told you, youd make me go, and I knew you needed someone to be with you tonight. Come on. Come on.
Chandler: See, I told you they dont swim. (He goes to take it out)
Rachel: Well, I mean, sure, of course. But... you already gave that to Monica, so...
Ross: Calm down. Theres no reason to get testy.
Mike: Phoebe, I love you. I mean, I missed you so much these last few months and I thought we were apart for a good reason, but then I suddenly realized that there was no reason good enough to keep me from spending the rest of my life with you.
Monica: This was fun! But I've got an invasive vaginal exam to get to! (leaves)
Chandler: Yeah, Joey said I uh, I needed to relax so he gave me an antihistamine.
Ross: Yes lets. Yknow what? Uh, its-its not important. What is important is that, is that were having a baby. And its notDoesnt matter who came on to who.
Joey: (shocked) Dah!! (Chandler motions for him to calm down.)
Ross: Alright, alright. We're all adults here, there's only one way to resolve this. Since you saw her boobies, I think, uh, you're gonna have to show her your peepee.
Monica: Oh my God, the cat's made my eyes water! Don't-don't throw it to me! My vision's been compromised!! (Quickly grabs a tissue to wipe her eyes.) Oh God! Okay. Okay. It's okay. Man, that was close.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is still trying to get Ben to play with something other than the Barbi doll.]
Phoebe: Im, uhh, making up flyers trying to get new massage clients. So, can I come to Bloomingdales and use the copy machine.
The Cooking Teacher: Monica, you go to the head of the class.
Phoebe: (softly) Sorry. (Camera pans back to Monica, still on phone)
(Ross walks over to the scrum, walks around a bit looking for a way to get into the scrum.)
(He leaves. Cut to Monica entering Chandler and Joey's apartment. She sneaks up to the shower door)
Rachel: Thanks, but I gotta go to work and get my eyes scratched out by Mindy.
[Scene: Dr. Rhodes's Office, a rather large group of doctors has now gathered to take a look at Ross's thing. Ross is none too pleased with the developments, he has a disgusted look on his face.]
MONICA: Really? Weird. Anyway, see, I planned everything really well. I planned and I planned and I planned. It just turns out, I don't think I planned enough time to actually do it.
Monica: If we wanna get on camera, I think we have to get up on one of those platforms. Theyve been taping those people up there all day.
Rachel: (to Monica) Ok, ok, ok. How did this happen to me? How did this happen to me? A week ago, two weeks ago, I was fine. Ross was just Ross, just this guy. Now he's Rrrooossss, oh, this really great guy that I can't have.
Joey: You got it! Oh-oh! (He starts patting the burned spot, which just happens to be over her breast.)
JOEY: Yeah, we're goin' to a Ranger game.
Phoebe Sr.: Sorry. But just one last thing. Y'know you came looking for family. Im family, Im it. Now, now Im done. (starts to leave)
Joey: (whispers to Phoebe and Rachel) Hey, thank you so much. (They both exit.)
Phoebe: Or, yknow, I used to beg for money. Of course it helps if youve got yknow a little of this (she sticks her chest out and shakes it) goin on. Wow! I still have it!
[Scene, The Airport, continued from last season, Rachel is waiting for Ross to come of the plane, when she sees he's coming off with another woman.]
(They all rush toward Rachel, who panics and runs away. She runs out of the park and up along the fence, she then comes back into the park and runs past Monica, as she gets to Monica, she throws the ball at Monica, and it hits her in the eye.)
Joey: Ah, he cant make it, he said he had to his... (sees Ginger) Whoa-oh! (hides behind the coat rack.)
Mrs. Burkart: (in grief) Jack used to handle the finances! (Breaks into tears)
MR. BOYLE: All right, kids. Here's the deal. According to my client's will, he wants to leave all his earthly possessions to "the noisy girls in the apartment above mine".
Phoebe: Oh youre my biggest fan? Ive always wanted to meet you! Hi! (Shakes his hand.) Sure! Yeah! (Signs the autograph)
Chandler: Stop it! Youre killing me! I think I just moved on to Phase Four!
Phoebe: Okay, this is inexcusable. I am shocked to my very core!
Phoebe: Go Charlie! But my point is, ok so she dated them but she also broke up with them. Maybe she's looking to, you know, slum it with some average Joe Phd.
Phoebe: But I already gave them back to you!
Joey: So, so is she still going to Paris?
Ross: (loudly) So I'm going over to Amanda's tonight!
(Ross frantically starts to open the window as Paul enters and traps him halfway out the window.)
Ross: God, you're amazing... I didn't even have to ask you to call me that.
Phoebe: Oh Chandler! Thank God you're alive. Monica, can I talk to you outside for a minute?
Joey: Get the ball, ready? Get the ball, get the ball! (Joey pretends to throw it, but really doesnt, and the dog goes running off.) Well, youre cute, but youre not too smart!
Ross: That was the only way I could get him to stop typing!
Joey: No, Yeeees. God, how do I say this. (walks into the kitchen, Chandler follows closely, he turns around and gets startled). Oh, hi, you know that girl from the Greek restaurant with the hair (holds his hands up to signify she has big hair)?
Phoebe: YOU’RE SO GENEROUS AND KIND AND (crowd stops cheering) YOU'RE AMAZING IN BED (everyone hears it and stare at them.) (to everybody) IT’S OUR ANNIVERSARY!
Joey: Uh well yeah, that was the plan, but by the time I got to it there was only a couple of pieces left!
Joey: I didn't have to tell you that!! I'm stupider than Jane Rogers!!
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey's on the couch when Ross walks to him, with his jacket closed.]
Benjamin: I'm sorry. I just haven't seen her for so long! All these feelings are rushing back! I'm starting to realize how much I missed her, and I'm gonna need you to break up with her.
Chandler: When it comes down to it, you would risk your life for Ross before you would for me. That's the bottom line.
Joey/Drake: How can I? Knowing I'll never hold you in my arms again, or touch your skin, or feel your lips, knowing I'll never make love to you? How can I accept that... I can never kiss you again when it's all I can do not to kiss you right now.
Joshua: I invested in this night-club and its opening tonight, would you like to come?
Phoebe: So great! Okay! Tomorrow were gonna drive out to Montauk.
[Cut to Chandler and Joey's, Ross is seen throwing the ball into the bathroom, presumably where Joey is currently using the facilities.]
Joey: (To Rachel) Do you think he saw us or can we still sneak out?
SUSAN: Suddenly I'm seeing him go off to college.
Phoebe: Can I get you something to drink? Like a water and Valium?
Monica: You see that guy? Hes in classics now, but y'know as soon as we leave hes going straight to the porn.
(Joey enters with Monica's paper and hands it to her.)
The Professor: Do you have a moment to talk about your lecture?
Nurse: Just so you know, Dr. Long cant be here today, she was called to the hospital, so Dr. Schiff will be seeing you.
Ross: (sigh)....I have to go to China.
Monica: You gotta go home and get the earrings that you borrowed from me okay? Chandler wants me to wear them tonight.
Monica: Anyway, I picked up this outfit that I want to wear and the, and the boots dont really go with it.
Ross: I cant believe we have to say goodbye to the house we grew up in. Man, some-some strangers gonna be living in my room.
Joey: Just trying to get comfortable. I can't sleep in my underwear.
Joey: (With Big Eyes.) All right, youre right. Ill talk to her.
Joey: (entering, with bag) Hey! I'm off to my audition. How do I look?
Chandler: Well, you got here just in time. I really have to go buddy. (They hug)
Phoebe: No, no, no, oh no-no-no, its has to be 800. (picks up the instruction manual to check the phone number) Cause all those big companies have 800 numbers, every one. (Finds the number) Yeah, every big Utah-based company has one.
Chandler: They said it could be up to a year.
[Scene: Another street, somewhere along the River Themes, Ross, Emily, and Monica are walking to where theyre gonna get married. Emily is relating the troubles with the caterer.]
Ross: Well, I tried! But when I got to my lawyers office all I could hear was, "Three divorces. Three divorces!" Look, I just dont want my tombstone to read, Ross Gellar, Three Divorces.
Monica: Come on Chandler, come on, I can handle Ross. (They go to the door. Ross is trying to stick his hand through and undo the chain; Monica pushes his hand back.) (To Ross) Hold on! (She opens the door.) Hey Ross. What's up bro?
Chandler: I didn't get to the bathroom. I bumped into Owen on the way, and he didn't know he was adopted. And there's a slight chance I may have told him.
Whitfield: (sits down) Well, I have to tell you, I was quite impressed with your paper on Pre-Cretaceous fossils. Yeah, it confirmed everything that I have written.
Ross: Right that's why I came over to talk about. Hum...I saw Rachel kissing some guy on your balcony,even though there were NO LIGHTS !
Rachel: No! Come on its late, were not gonna go down to the office.
Rachel: Joey, why wouldn't you invite us to your parties?
Phoebe: Oh, you are so going to Minsk. You belong in Minsk. You can't stay here just 'cause of me.
Rachel: And last year is that why you sent us to that medieval times restaurant?
Phoebe: Im sorry. Im sorry. I never got to be in a club. I-I didnt go to high school, but three of us would meet behind a dumpster to learn French. Bonjour.
Chandler: I know, I know, I just always wondered if I could get her eyes to pop out of her head.
Monica: Yknow what? He will forgive you. And I like to bring a pad with me when I go answer the phone just in case (Chandler gets that disgusted look back.) Okay
Monica: Nothing. I just want the baby to be born today.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Carol and Susan are showing off Ben to the gang.]
Joey: (whispering to Chandler) Youll tell me later?
Rachel: I forgot... I am supposed to pick up a friend at the airport. I am so sorry! I'm so... if you want to stay, and finish your drinks, please do.... (gives him her drink) I meanI'm sorry. I-I-I gotta go. I'm sorry.
Rachel: I can't believe this. All I wanted to do was help you try to figure out what to do with your life and this is how you repay me?
Joey: Yeah, you'd think I'd give up being a minister and start paying to ride the subway? Huhuh...
Joey: Yeah. I realized it about a half-hour ago but I didn't want to say anything 'cause I didn't want to jinx it.
The Food Critic: Im torn, between my integrity and my desire to avoid a beating. But I must be honest, your soap is abysmal. (Throws down the spoon and walks out.)
Dina: What are you going to do? Kill him? Like you did with Charles?!
Chandler: No-no-no-no-no-no-no!! I cant get myself right out of them! You must have me confused with the Amazing Chandler!! Come on, you have to unlock me, she could be gone for hours, and Im cold, and (Stops and looks up the skirt on a statue behind Joannas desk.)
Phoebe: Uh Joey, were trying to dial down the crazy.
Joey: Yeah, well, I still got a week left to go in the program, and according to the rules, if I want to get the money I'm not allowed to conduct any... ersonal experiments, if you know what I mean.
Ross: Oh, but I've got tickets to the Van Gogh exhibit! I've been waiting like a year for this.
Ross: Ok, I'm off to talk to my unborn child.
Katie: Yeah, I just gotta run to the bathroom.
Bill: Some little snacks for everybody. Oh, you don't have to eat the sour worms. Those are for Owen.
(Joey whispers in Rachels ear to confirm his response.)