words in movies
Joey: How many times do I have to tell you! Ya, turn and sliiiide! Y'know, turn and slide.
Chandler: You dont turn and slide, you throw it out! Im tired of having to get a tetanus shot every time I get dressed!
Joey: All right. But, youre gonna have to tell them. (He opens the cabinet to reveal the chick and the duck living inside with Christmas lights and a disco ball as decorations.)
Chandler: (nods his head) Do you mind if we stick you in another cabinet? (to Joey) They seem all right with it!
Ross: The guy who took Rachel to the prom? Why is he calling you?
Ross: (to Rachel) I was just leaving.
Rachel: Good! Cause Ive got a product report to read, its like eight pages, I hope I dont fall asleep.
Rachel: (interrupting) I bet he sensed that I was ready to have sex with another guy.
Ross: (whispering in her ear) Oh, thats right! He called to ask out Monica! That-thats gotta be embarrassing!
Chandler: All right look, Im changing it to 50 bucks, or your best offer.
Rachel: Something to do with numbers?
[Cut to someone entering Central Perk which lets a cat in. The cat then runs over to Phoebes guitar case and starts sniffing around.]
Phoebe: No Dr. Skeptismo! Im sure. First of all, okay, theres the feeling. (Chandler shrugs) Okay, and for another, how about the fact that she went into my guitar case which is lined with orange felt. (Rachel nods her head in unsure agreement) My Mothers favourite fish is Orange Roughy... (Joey thinks he understands, but then nods that he has no clue.) Cats....like....fish! (Ross and Rachel are totally lost) (to the cat) Hi, Mommy. (Rachel covers her mouth, in an Oh my God. gesture) Oh, I havent seen this smile in 17 years!
Joey: (to Chandler) Dude, Phoebes mom has got a huge peni...
Rachel: Nooo! Its not okay! I cant believe you would want to after what he did to me!
Rachel: I mean why, of all people would you want to go out with Chip?!
Monica: Look, you and I went to different high schools...
Rachel: Okay, that doesnt help me, because we went to the same high school.
Monica: You went to one where you were popular, and you got to ride off Chips motorcycle, and wear his letterman jacket. I went to one where I wore a band uniform they had to have specially made.
Rachel: (shocked) They had to have that specially made?!
Monica: Back then, I thought that I would never, ever get the chance to go out with a Chip Matthews, and now hes-hes called me up and asked me out. And the fat girl inside of me really wants to go. I-I owe her this. I never let her eat.
Chandler: Yes, Joey has a very careful screening process. Apparently, not everyone is qualified to own wood and nails.
Phoebe: (is struggling with the cat) Stop it! Stop it! She keeps squirming, trying to get away! Just like when she was alive.
Phoebe: Well, Im not sure. I mean, I guess until she y'know, gets used to the fact that theres y'know, a new mom. Y'know, I think shes worried that y'know, shes gonna, shes gonna be replaced. (to the cat, in a funny voice) Well, thats not gonna happen is it? Noo. (gets up) Okay, I have to return a call in the other room.
Rachel: Oh sure I am, because you always have to be right.
Ross: I do not always have to beokay, okay. (starts to leave)
(Ross wants to say something, but just smiles and leaves.)
Chandler: Youll have to pardon my roommate, he wanted to marry this.
Tony: We dont have 50 bucks, but would you be willing to trade for it? Weve got a canoe.
Peter: Were not throwing it away! I built that canoe! (starts to leave as Tony chases after him)
Joey: (to Peter) Good for you!!
Rachel: Do we have to tell her?
Ross: Yes, we have to tell her!
Ross: (holds up a hand) Little girl misses her cat. (hold up the other hand) Crazy lady thinks her mother is in a cat. (gets up) Okay, y'know what, I have to go have dinner with my son, can I trust that when you see Phoebe, you will tell her.
Monica: (sliding into Joeys place on the couch to try and talk to Phoebe) Huh? Whatd ya say Joe? Ill be right there. (gets up and joins Joey)
Monica: (running from the bathroom to her room, wearing only a towel) Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! (gets to her room and closes the door, as Rachel gets up to answer the door.)
Joey: This is the unit for you my friend. Sturdy construction, tons of storage compartments, some big enough to fit a grown man.
(The guys takes a hockey stick and slips it through the handles then proceeds to take the stereo and Chandlers computer and walk out.)
Joey: Sometimes I get in here just to get away from it! Hey, a nickel!!
[Scene: A street, Chip is walking Monica to his motorcycle.]
Monica: Thats what we used to call your ah, your motorcycle in high school. Y'know how a motorcycle is a Chopper, and youre Chip. Nevermind.
Chip: Oh yeah, I still hang with Simmons and Zana, y'know. I see Spindler a lot. Devane, Kelly, and I run into Goldie from time to time. Steve Brown, Zuchoff, McGwire, J.T., Breadsly.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is coming home. As we walks through the door, and without looking up, he goes to throw his keys on the foosball table, only, its gone and the keys it the floor. He then looks up at an empty apartment; everything is gone except for the entertainment center and that ceramic dog. Even the food in the fridge!]
Joey: Well, this guy came by to look at the unit and-and he said he didnt think big enough to fit a grown man!
Joey: I was tryin to make a sale!! Oh, man, if I ever run into that guy again, do you know what Im gonna do?
Monica: Look, not that I enjoy talking about people who I went to high school with, cause I do, but umm, maybe we could talk about something else? Like you, I dont even know where you work?
Chip: The movie theatre, you used to come in all the time.
Rachel: (to Monica) So, how was your date?
Monica: Well, y'know how I always wanted to go out with Chip Matthews in high school?
Monica: No, its okay, not only did I get to go out with Chip Matthews, I got to dump Chip Matthews.
Ross: Hi! Listen uhh, this cat belongs to a little girl. There are flyers all over the place.
Phoebe: Ohh. Um-hmm. But y'know, she choose to find me. I mean, I have to respect her decision. Right?
Ross: I dont know what to say.
Rachel: You could.... say youre sorry to her mom.
Ross: (goes over to Julio) Come here, here, come here, come here, (pause) Mrs. Buffay. Sorry, about what I said, umm, it was, it was insensitive of me to say that you were just a cat. When clearly you are also the reincarnated spirit, of my friends mother.
Phoebe: Yeah, okay, listen, umm, Mom, I hope you know you still mean a lot to me. And youre welcome to come back anytime.
Joey: Dude, you dont have to brag! We got nothing here!!
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey and Chandler have trading the entertainment center for the canoe. Joey is sitting in the bow, staring off into space as to envision his future full of possibilities. Chandler is sitting at the stern, staring into space and is looking at an uncertain future.]
Chandler: What 'not work out'? I'm seeing her again on Thursday. Didn't you listen to the story?
Ross: Really? That would be great. I mean, I have to do something, she kinda teased me about how I dress.
Phoebe: Oh, hi, Mrs. Waltham. I need to speak with ether one of the best men, or Rosss sister Monica.
Rachel: Do you want to put the book in the freezer?
Rachel: Well, remember how we were too drunk to remember anything the night we were married?
[Cut back to Monica and Chandler telling Phoebe and Joey the story.]
Chandler: (pauses as he struggles with what he has to say) Youre a little high maintenance.
(They start to kiss, and Ross rushes into the office to break it up.)
Bonnie: (to Ross) Shoot! I cant go, I have to work!
Phoebe: Oh, I know a way that you can decide! All right, I'm going to ask you a series of questions and you answer as quickly as you can.
Robert: Ah, good to meet you. Robert.
Chandler: (to Ross) Hey, so can you make it on Friday?
Monica: Maybe Joey doesnt have to give you the money, TV stars have assistants right?
Joey: She made me switch to light Mayo. Thats it! Thats all I got! And, you know what? It tastes the same and my pants fit better!
Chandler: Were not gonna lose to girls.
Joey: Thats what that was?! Cause that other thing? I thought you were on to something, but it did nothing for me.
Monica: Let me try. (Gets up to join them.)
Monica: Well, if you dont have anything to copy, why are you going down there?
Monica: (in the hallway) So, where do you want to go?
MONICA: That's Great. You know we don't need to talk about this now. Really, I mean this is, is so way, way, way, in the future, I'm talkin' hovercrafts and apes taking over the planet.
[Scene: Classroom. Joey is writing his name on the board, but turns around before hes done which causes him to write his name with a downward curve, and he then underlines it, and draws the line right through his name.]
[Scene: The Broom Closet, Ross is trying to open the door with a credit card, with no success.]
Monica: (to Julio) So! I'm just an empty vase, huh?
Guy: I hope you dont think Im crazy but I feel like I was meant to pick this up, do you believe in that kind of thing?
Ross: (sarcastic) Ill try to control myself.
Ross: Look Chandler, Monica is really weird about this kind stuff all right. Believe me, I lived with her for 16 years. She is going to freak out. Oh my God, she's going to sit on you.
Rachel: Anyway, they want to take us out Saturday night! What do you say?
Monica: Good. Okay, Im just gonna wait for Chandler to open the rest of them.
(They turn back to Rachel and Professor Rathman.)
Rachel: Honey, why dont you sit down? Dina has something that she wants to tell you.
Ross: Yeah, okay, hold on! (He puts the phone down and proceeds to spread a large amount of powder on his legs and makes another attempt at pulling up his pants. It doesn't work, and without picking up the phone leans down to it.) (Almost in tears.) They're not coming on man.
Monica: You are so handsome! I wanna make love to you right here, right now! (Growls and pulls him into a kiss.)
Ross: Pity food? Y'know what thats okay, all right, I dont need any of you to stay, okay nobody stays.
Monica: (starting to cry) Im sorry I almost made you sleep with Ross. (They hug.)
[Scene: The Atlantis Resort, Chandler and Monica are arriving to check in, but are behind the couple from before again.]
Joey: Oh, okay. Phoebe, do you take this man to be your husband?
Chandler: Gary, I'm here to report a crime.
[Scene: The gate at the airport. The passengers are standing in line, and they're about to board the plane again.]
Phoebe: (To Joey) Which means she had a couple spritzers and a quick peck on the cheek.
Girl: Really? You don't know what that means to me.
Chandler: (to Ross) Dont try to sway her. (To Monica) (Softly) Im your only chance to have a baby. Okay, lets go.
Chandler: No, see the thing is I want to get out of here before Joey gets all worked up and starts calling everybody bitch.
Rachel: Phoebe, Im going to Rosss wedding because he is my ex-boyfriend and that would be really uncomfortable. Not because, Im still in love with him! I mean, hey, yknow, I like Ross as much as the next guy, yknow? Clearly I have feelings for him, but feelings dont mean love! I mean, I still have loving feelings for Ross. Yeah! But, I have, I have continuing feelings of love, but that doesnt mean that-that Im still in love with him. Yknow? I-I have sexual feelings for him, but I do love himOhh! Oh my God! Oh mywhy didnt you tell me?!!
Chandler: Deposit my specimen? You know, usually I have to call a 900 number for that kind of talk. Thanks, got it.
Joey: Give me a number, I dont want to owe you anything!
Phoebe: Ooh, yknow what, I think its time for puppy to go out again. Come on, lets go to the balcony.
Joey: Well.. hey, you know what else I could use? There's a scene where Drake sneaks into Olivia's bedroom, and she doesn't know he's there - which never happened with us! And he knows he shouldn't be there, but he just wants to look at her... you know? (In a romantic voice) And I remember all those mornings before you even put on your make-up, when I would think to myself, my God, she...is... beautiful... (Rachel looks very moved) and it hurts so much, cuz I knew I could never tell you (pauses, while looking at her with sentiment) but it was worth it just to be there looking at you.
RICHARD: Hey. They're just trying to decide somehting.
Ross: Besides, I-I think I figured out a much faster route, Im sure I can make it this time. I just I just cant be afraid to get a little bit hit by cars. (He goes to the bathroom as Joey enters.)
[Cut to Chandler]
Joey: Relax. Here hold this (hands her his beer). This old stuff just comes right off. (he bends down to try and lift some tile right in the middle of the floor, in his tight pants.)
Phoebe: I did it! One mile on a hippity-hop! Thats it!! Thats everything I wanted to do before I was thirty. Oh, except I wanted to patch things up with my sister. But oh well. Yay!! (They all cheer again.) And-and girls this thing is a Godsend if you know what I mean. (Rachel and Monica look intrigued and as they all head into Central Perk, Rachel picks up the hippity-hop that Phoebe left behind.)
Chandler: Hey. I just, I just wanted to come over to-to say that Im sorry. Yknow? I know I acted like the biggest idiot in the world, and I can completely understand why you were so upset.
Ross: No! Pick me! I dont want to end up an old maid!
Frank: Well, we got into a fight cause ah, she said I was to immature to get married.
Ross: (to Monica and Rachel) Its winter, they are fewer people on the street. (Rachel and Monica smile and nod, knowingly.)
Ross: Fine! No more dinosaur stuff! Can I talk about fossils? (Joey is about to sit down and hears this so instead he groans and exits.)
Joey: Oh, hold up, I'll walk out with you. Now, Rach, when she taught you to kiss, you were at camp, and.. were you wearing any kinda little uniform, or- (Rachel exits and slams the door in his face.) That's fine, yeah...
Chandler: (To Rachel) Oh my God!
Ross: no, no, no there's nothing wrong with you I mean you don't strike me as the type of person that wants to get married anyway.
Rachel: Well, just because it happened that way for them doesn't mean it has to happen that way for us.
Ross: Im asking you to do me a favor.
Waiter #2: What are you doing? Are you trying to get him to stay? Because you can't do that.
Phoebe: Whoa! Why do you get to answer the door?
Chandler: Oh right, your allergies. (Monica leaves and to the chick and duck) All her, she hates you. (Chandler leaves without finishing the message for Joey.)
Phoebe: Yeah, its totally meant to be. (To Monica) Tell him who you originally wanted to hook up with that night.
Chandler: Okay, heres the situation. The keys to the cuffs are on the back of the door. Could you be a doll and grab them and scoot on over and unlock me? And on a totally different subject, that is a lovely pantsuit.
Chandler: All right, who keeps leaving old newspapers in the trash?! I really wanted to take Kathy to this, I cant believe I missed it.
Phoebe: But we have to!
Ross: You're not going to go.
Phoebe: (To Joey) What?!
Ross: All right, I gotta go. I'm taking Ben to the park.
(They try to stop him, not sure of what he's planning. He ignores them and goes to talk to Ross.)
[Scene: The conference room in Tulsa again, Chandler is trying to evade Wendy]
[Cut to the roof, where Joey and Mr. Treeger are dancing happily to ^Night and Day^.]
Phoebe: Okay but thats why you have to buy it, so it can fulfil its Christmas destiny, otherwise there gonna throw it into the chipper. Tell him, Joey
Chandler: Why? This was supposed to be a temp job!
Ross: Wait a minute! I saw that! On The Discovery Channel, yeah! About jellyfish and how if you... (stops suddenly and turns to look at Monica) Ewwww!! You peed on yourself?!
Chandler: I just didn't want to tell you in front of them.
MONICA: Yeah. You're just gonna have to stop pissing me off.
Burt: (another professor) Wow! It looks like you were very generous with your grades this semester! (Ross frantically starts to change some as a female student, Elizabeth, approaches.)
Ross: And then, like three days in a row he got to the newspaper before I did, and peed all over the crossword.
[Cut to Joey and Janine]
Monica: Anyway, it just doesnt seem worth it to make a whole turkey for just three people. Okay? Its a lot of work.
Phoebe: This is so cool, til Monica gets back, its like Im head chef and I get to make all the decisions. (She looks at the remaining butter, and then decides to add it to the dish.)
Phoebe: I don't have to tell you everything!
(They dance over to him.)
Monica: Yes! (They run over to a platform)
Joey: Later! (He runs away down the hall and hides behind a corner to a whole other corridor.) Oh man! (Walks down the hallway in desperation.) Hot girl! Hot girl!!
Rachel: N-it wasn�t easy, but it�s your birthday and I did what I got to do.
Ross: You know what, I think weve had all the bad luck were going to have. (He hugs her.)
Ross: (pause) No. But... it only has to happen once. Look, you and I both know we are perfect for each other, right? I mean... so, the only question is... are you attracted to me?
Phoebe: (To Ross) Saved your ass.
Joey: No way. I've been going to the guy for 12 years.
Chandler: You can wear them with shorts on a street corner and earn the money to pay for them. (Goes and gets some coffee at the counter.)
MONICA: Nooo! Never! I mean, we're living in the moment. God, it is so nice for once to not have to get all hung up on 'Where is this going?'
Ross: Why does anyone have to be naked?
Ross: I talked to Monica, look, I'm the one who made the choice. I'm the one who's making things change, so I should be the one to y'know, step back.
Rachel: Oh Mon, listen I have to ask! Okay, Joey Tribbiani invited me back to his apartment, now does he do this with a lot of girls?
(Ross enters the room, takes off his robe and enters the booth. He stands with his back to the nozzles and then realises that this booth has nozzles at both sides of the wall)