words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, later that morning. The porn is still on, there are three women getting ready to shave the chest of some guy. Joey and Chandler are wondering why that guy is letting them shave his chest, and Monica and Rachel are eating breakfast at the foosball table.]
Rachel: Well, so, are-are you sure that there are three?!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there, waiting to tell Frank and Alice the news.]
Phoebe: Well, Frank has to quit college because his super fertile sister is having three babies! I need to make a lot of money really fast, and I had an idea that I want to talk to you (Points to Chandler) about, cause you work for a big company. Okay, insider trading, what information is there that you can give me.
Rachel: Well, what-what cha got there?
Emily: Ross umm, theres something that Ive got to tell you, theres-theres someone else.
Monica: This isnt how its supposed to go, there cant be another guy.
Monica: Of course theres another guy!! This is even more perfect! Now you have to prove your love!
Joey: Oh yeah, sure, that makes sense. Yeah. Cause you already told her you love her and she didnt say it back, then she called you and told you that theres another guy, so yeah, go to London thatll scare her!
Monica: Okay, just stay there a couple more hours and if she doesnt show up by then, then just come on home.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, later that same night. There is a knock on the door and Chandler answers it to reveal Emily standing behind it.]
Emily: I uh, Ive been to his apartment and he wasnt there, and uh. I need to talk to him, so do you have any idea where he is?
Emily: Ross, are you there? Ross, I dont know if you can hear this but (Ross has moved to the window, apparently so that he can hear better.) Im gonna talk anyway, uh, Im in the States with you sister and your friends and its all over with Colin. I came here to tell you that, and to tell youYes, Joey you can have all the chocolate you want, just take it! Uh, I came here to tell you that I love you.
Emily: I wish I could know if youd heard any of that. I suppose Ive either just told you I love you or given my neighbours a good laugh. Mrs. Newman if youre listening, bugger off this in none of your business. I suppose theres not much chance you did heard that, and theres the call waiting so, I should go. Oh well. (Answers the call waiting.) Hello.
Chandler: I was just at the bank, and there was this really hot teller, and she didnt ask me to go do it with her in the vault.
Ross: now when they found the remains of the Mesozoic Mastodon they discovered what appeared to be the remains of a Paleozoic Amphibian in its jaws! How did it get there?!
(Theres a knock on the door and a nurse enters carrying Emma.)
Phoebe: Not if I get there first.
Monica: We are there!
Joey: Or ha-ha, we could go over there and pee on them.
Ross: oh boy you got mad at that part. I went over there to tell him how great you are but you know me BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, and I ended up telling him that.
Ross: Hey, whatd you guys do to get up on there?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, Monica, and Ross are there.]
Chandler: Is there any chance you didnt see that?
Phoebe: Oh well, what do you know, there goes my identical twin sister. Just walkin' along looking like me. What, is this just like a freakish coincidence, or did you know she takes this train?
Chandler: Y'know what, hes right. Theres something like uh, ammonia in that, that like kills the pain.
Phoebe: Hi, its Phoebe. Listen someones gonna have to take my 9:00 with Mr. Rehack, cause its like 9:15 now, and Im not there.
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there.]
Rachel: Yeah, and could you please chop some up and just put it right there in the sauce?
RACHEL: Let me tell you something. As a woman there is nothing sexier than a man who does not want to have sex.
Monica: So-so there is no party.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment, everyone except Joey is there.]
[Scene: Mr. Treegers apartment, Joey is there to suck up.]
Phoebe: Oh Joey, weve heard the specials three times! Okay? Theres prime rib, mahi mahi, and a very special lobster ravioli. (She grabs his menu and hands it to the waiter.)
Tour Guide: Oh, he wont sit here. Only the people in the white coats sit over there, (Points to there table) and only the people in the blue blazers sit here.
Joey: I hate Pottery Barn too. They kicked me out of there just because I sat on a bed!
Kate: Nooo. And theres really no reason he should find out, so ah lets not make a big deal about it, okay?
Chandler: So shes just waiting over there for ya?
Joey: Thank you. Wait-wait-wait-wait, you see me again. Hang on, the guy's butt's blockin' me. There I am, there I am, there I am, there I am, there I am
Phoebe: Yeah, uh-huh, there was nothing. (Pause) Can I get some water?
Chandler: (To Joey) Look there is no way youre doing this wedding now. Okay?
Phoebe: Why dont you go up there and ask him to step lightly, please?
[Scene: Restraunt. Joey and Erica are still there.]
Monica: Yeah, well you call her and tell her that yknow when we were kids her precious little Frannie tried to undress me several times, okay? And if I hadnt have stopped her, there probably wouldnt even be a wedding to go too.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning, they are all there eating breakfast.]
Joey: Theres a lost and found? (Gunther sets the box up on the table.) My shoe! (Grabs it out of the box.)
Older Scientist: Dr. Geller, theres a seat over here. (Motions to an empty chair at the white table.)
MRS. GREEN: [entering] There she is.
Monica: Hi, Chandler. There you are.
Rachel: (Glances at Joey and then sips his coffee) There. Now there is.
(Theres a knock on the door and Ross enters.)
Chandler: (spotting her) Oh-hey-hey-hey! There you are!
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, Phoebe, and Monica are there.]
MONICA: Ya know what, I think I'm gonna go to my room and read Cosmo, maybe there's something helpful in there. Know what, at least maybe I can learn how to do an at home bikini wax with leftover Cristmas candles.
Phoebe: Umm, okay, okay, look. I took this picture from your fridge. Okay, because I know that this is my Father. Yeah, this is Frank Buffay and you are standing right there next to him. Now, look I deserve to know where I came from. All right? So if you can help me find my Father then you should! Otherwise, youre just mean! (pause) So, just tell me the truth!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Phoebe are there as Rachel enters.]
Phoebe: (finishing removing her bra) Okay, there.
Rachel: Oh there is no way.
Joey: Yknow I dont think you should be talking at all in there! I think youve got to much thinking to do to be talking and making jokes!
All: I dont have anything. (All of the rest of the women there hide their gifts behind their backs.)
Rachel: Oh Ross, hi! Hey, how are ya? There you are!
Ross: No, but ah, theres coconut in the Hanukkah Menoreoes. I tell you what, Ill put you down for eight boxes, one for each night.
Monica: Guys, hurry up! The flight leaves in four hours! It could take time to get a taxi! There could be traffic! The plane could leave early! When we get to London, there could be a line at customs! Come on!! (She runs back to her apartment.)
Ross: Look, you'll get there. You're an amazing chef.
Joey: And, uhh, maybe the watering can there.
[Scene: Mr. Ratstatter's office. Monica is there.]
Chandler: Theres no back to this couch!
Joey: Dude, if you go back out there, youre gonna be Dead Ross!
Phoebe: Oh, its bad. Its really bad. The only thing in there that isnt burned is an ass. Which I do not remember buying!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Ross, and Rachel are there.]
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there.]
Phoebe: Ah! Well! There you go! Last to know again! And I'm guessing... since nobody told me... this is Paolo.
(Theres an awkward silence.)
Janice: Im telling you Rachel, listen to Janice. They all say theyre gonna be there until they start their real family.
Rachel: Get your hands out of there! No!
[Scene: Chandler's office. Joey is there.]
[Scene: A Restaurant, Joey and Chandler are there, waiting for their dates to show up.]
Gunther: (In his head) Say Rachel, I was wondering if youd like to go to a movie with me sometime. As my lover! Nnnsch, to out there. Maybe youd just like to ah, get something to eat with me sometime? As my lover.
Monica: Oh my God, that place has the creamiest frosting! I use to hitchhike there when I was a kid.
Rachel: Well yeah, but then I remembered I started it and there was this pep rally and I was, I was on top of the pyramid but anywayumm, what is this book about?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Rachel, Ross, Joey, and Phoebe are there waiting for Chandler's cyberchick to arrive]
Ross: Hey Im sorry to do this to you again but uh, is there any way you can look after Ben for a little bit? I-Ive got this meeting at school. And-and he-he asked for his uh, Fun Aunt Rachel, so
[Scene: Estelle Leonard Theatrical Agency, Joey is there to see his agent.]
Joey: Its uh, right through there. (Points.)
Monica: (to the restuarant customers) Excuse me, excuse me, hi, I'm Monica Geller..I'm the head chef here.. (pauses as if waiting for something).. Ok, I was actually expecting a little applause there, but whatever! Ok, quick question: by a show of hands, how many of you were bothered by this woman's singing outside? (a few people raise their hands)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's. Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe are there. Chandler enters.]
(Theres a knock on the door.)
Monica: Phoebe! You're sick, you shouldn't play. You should just go home, get in bed, and stay there.
Chandler: Im sorry man, theres never a good time to (pauses) stop catching on fire.
Joey: Uh, well he did not get sick somewhere in there and it was immediately found and properly cleaned up!
Joey: No you dont, I just saw you go in there with Monica!
Phoebe: Wow, that sounds great! And what are you making Monica, in case Rachels dessert is...[about to say bad] so good that I eat all of it. Theres none left for anybody else!
[Time lapse. Melanie, Joey's girlfriend, is there with Joey, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel. Ross is gone.]
Ross: Is there somebody else?
Joey: Okay, but lets say there was. How might that go?
Chandler: There are snow cones! (Monica glares at him.) Snow cones! Yuck!
(There is a knock on Rachel and Phoebes door.)
Chandler: You just thought of that in there?
Joey: Shes right in there. (motions to the living room)
Ross: Oh, oh there go the clothes.
Ross: But, Elizabeth and I are-are both adults and so I dont think theres really anything you can do about it.
Chandler: Honey, it is not a date! I havent talked to her in ten years! You cant just call up somebody you havent talked to in ten years and ask them for a favor. There are rules, yknow? You gotta, you got to put in some time.
Joey: He can still catch her! Come on, get out of there! (He opens the box) Get out of there!
Dr. Leedbetter: There may have been a-a joke or a limerick of some kind.
Gunther: I thought you were Chandler. But umm, one of who is over there.
Chandler: No, there were two.
Joey: (shocked) Thats mean! You really had me going there!
Gunther: (to Chandler) Oh, no-no, no-no-no, theres none of that in here.
Phoebe: No, you can't go there! You know how I feel about these "big massage places"! They're putting people like me out of business!
Chandler: Thats still in there?!
Chandler: Oh? Did somebody miss me? Is there a child to raise poorly?
Estelle: Well, I think uhh, someone out there may have been bad mouthing you all over town.
Janice: (entering) Hey there Ross!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Everyone is there. Monica is watching stock prices on a business channel.]
Rachel: (to the closed door) Hang in there. You hang in there. (Gives him the raspberry.)