words in movies
[Scene: Rifts Restaurant, as seen in Mad About You, Joey and Chandler are there.]
Joey: Theres the waitress. Excuse me, Miss. Hello, Miss?
Ursula: Yeah, um, I was over there, then you said, "Excuse me, hello Miss," so now Im here.
Ross: No, Susans gonna be there too. Weve got dads, weve got lesbians, the whole parenting team.
Ross: Hi, um, Im err, (has to clear his throat) Im Ross Geller, and err ah... (pats Carols bulge) ..thats, thats my boy in there, and uh, (points) this is Carol Willick, and this... is Susan Bunch. Susan is um Carols, just, com... (embarrassment finally overwhelms the poor fellow, who becomes incoherent until) ..whos next?
Rachel: Well, someone was supposed to write "Rach, take down the lights" and put it on the re... frigerate... (finally noticing Monicas note stuck to the refrigerator) How long has that been there?
Joey: So that if we went out on a date, shed be there.
(He happily gestures at Chandler that there was nothing to worry about, then exits. Rachel and Monica are concerned for poor Phoebe, who slides back down next to Ross.)
[Scene: Lamaze class. Susan is there. Each couple has a doll, for they have just finished learning how to change a diaper. As Ross rushes in, stepping on the Rostins pretend baby, squashing its head flat. It bleats, in protest. He performs emergency surgery, then hands the doll back to J.C.]
Fran: Look, youre cold, I have to pee, and... (indicating the sign) ..theres a cup of coffee on the window. How bad could it be?
Jamie: No, no, no. We were there last night. She kept... (shuddering at the memory) ..bringing swordfish. (Indicating the ladies bathroom) are you gonna go to the, um?
(There is a loud knocking at the door through which Joey has just entered.)
(She rises, dragging Chandler along by the wool. Rachel has to leap over a chair to follow them. Monica opens the door to find Mr. Heckles standing there.)
Joey: I dont know. I like her, you know. Shes different. Theres uh, somethin about her.
Chandler: And thats the Chrysler Building right there.
(Phoebe buttons her lip, while the rest of the gang pretend theyre not there.)
Phoebe: Um, yeah. Look, I mean, Im not saying shes like evil or anything. She just, you know, shes always breaking my stuff. When I was eight, and I wouldnt let her have my Judy Jetson thermos, so she threw it under the bus. And then, oh, and then there was Randy Brown, who was like... Have you ever had a boyfriend who was like your best friend?
Tour Guide: Oh, he wont sit here. Only the people in the white coats sit over there, (Points to there table) and only the people in the blue blazers sit here.
Joey: I hate Pottery Barn too. They kicked me out of there just because I sat on a bed!
Kate: Nooo. And theres really no reason he should find out, so ah lets not make a big deal about it, okay?
Chandler: So shes just waiting over there for ya?
Joey: Thank you. Wait-wait-wait-wait, you see me again. Hang on, the guy's butt's blockin' me. There I am, there I am, there I am, there I am, there I am
Phoebe: Yeah, uh-huh, there was nothing. (Pause) Can I get some water?
Chandler: (To Joey) Look there is no way youre doing this wedding now. Okay?
Phoebe: Why dont you go up there and ask him to step lightly, please?
[Scene: Restraunt. Joey and Erica are still there.]
Monica: Yeah, well you call her and tell her that yknow when we were kids her precious little Frannie tried to undress me several times, okay? And if I hadnt have stopped her, there probably wouldnt even be a wedding to go too.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning, they are all there eating breakfast.]
Joey: Theres a lost and found? (Gunther sets the box up on the table.) My shoe! (Grabs it out of the box.)
Older Scientist: Dr. Geller, theres a seat over here. (Motions to an empty chair at the white table.)
MRS. GREEN: [entering] There she is.
Monica: Hi, Chandler. There you are.
Rachel: (Glances at Joey and then sips his coffee) There. Now there is.
(Theres a knock on the door and Ross enters.)
Chandler: (spotting her) Oh-hey-hey-hey! There you are!
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, Phoebe, and Monica are there.]
MONICA: Ya know what, I think I'm gonna go to my room and read Cosmo, maybe there's something helpful in there. Know what, at least maybe I can learn how to do an at home bikini wax with leftover Cristmas candles.
Phoebe: Umm, okay, okay, look. I took this picture from your fridge. Okay, because I know that this is my Father. Yeah, this is Frank Buffay and you are standing right there next to him. Now, look I deserve to know where I came from. All right? So if you can help me find my Father then you should! Otherwise, youre just mean! (pause) So, just tell me the truth!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Phoebe are there as Rachel enters.]
Phoebe: (finishing removing her bra) Okay, there.
Rachel: Oh there is no way.
Joey: Yknow I dont think you should be talking at all in there! I think youve got to much thinking to do to be talking and making jokes!
All: I dont have anything. (All of the rest of the women there hide their gifts behind their backs.)
Rachel: Oh Ross, hi! Hey, how are ya? There you are!
Ross: No, but ah, theres coconut in the Hanukkah Menoreoes. I tell you what, Ill put you down for eight boxes, one for each night.
Monica: Guys, hurry up! The flight leaves in four hours! It could take time to get a taxi! There could be traffic! The plane could leave early! When we get to London, there could be a line at customs! Come on!! (She runs back to her apartment.)
Ross: Look, you'll get there. You're an amazing chef.
Joey: And, uhh, maybe the watering can there.
[Scene: Mr. Ratstatter's office. Monica is there.]
Chandler: Theres no back to this couch!
Joey: Dude, if you go back out there, youre gonna be Dead Ross!
Phoebe: Oh, its bad. Its really bad. The only thing in there that isnt burned is an ass. Which I do not remember buying!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Ross, and Rachel are there.]
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there.]
Phoebe: Ah! Well! There you go! Last to know again! And I'm guessing... since nobody told me... this is Paolo.
(Theres an awkward silence.)
Janice: Im telling you Rachel, listen to Janice. They all say theyre gonna be there until they start their real family.
Rachel: Get your hands out of there! No!
[Scene: Chandler's office. Joey is there.]
[Scene: A Restaurant, Joey and Chandler are there, waiting for their dates to show up.]
Gunther: (In his head) Say Rachel, I was wondering if youd like to go to a movie with me sometime. As my lover! Nnnsch, to out there. Maybe youd just like to ah, get something to eat with me sometime? As my lover.
Monica: Oh my God, that place has the creamiest frosting! I use to hitchhike there when I was a kid.
Rachel: Well yeah, but then I remembered I started it and there was this pep rally and I was, I was on top of the pyramid but anywayumm, what is this book about?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Rachel, Ross, Joey, and Phoebe are there waiting for Chandler's cyberchick to arrive]
Ross: Hey Im sorry to do this to you again but uh, is there any way you can look after Ben for a little bit? I-Ive got this meeting at school. And-and he-he asked for his uh, Fun Aunt Rachel, so
[Scene: Estelle Leonard Theatrical Agency, Joey is there to see his agent.]
Joey: Its uh, right through there. (Points.)
Monica: (to the restuarant customers) Excuse me, excuse me, hi, I'm Monica Geller..I'm the head chef here.. (pauses as if waiting for something).. Ok, I was actually expecting a little applause there, but whatever! Ok, quick question: by a show of hands, how many of you were bothered by this woman's singing outside? (a few people raise their hands)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's. Ross, Rachel, and Phoebe are there. Chandler enters.]
(Theres a knock on the door.)
Monica: Phoebe! You're sick, you shouldn't play. You should just go home, get in bed, and stay there.
Chandler: Im sorry man, theres never a good time to (pauses) stop catching on fire.
Joey: Uh, well he did not get sick somewhere in there and it was immediately found and properly cleaned up!
Joey: No you dont, I just saw you go in there with Monica!
Phoebe: Wow, that sounds great! And what are you making Monica, in case Rachels dessert is...[about to say bad] so good that I eat all of it. Theres none left for anybody else!
[Time lapse. Melanie, Joey's girlfriend, is there with Joey, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel. Ross is gone.]
Ross: Is there somebody else?
Joey: Okay, but lets say there was. How might that go?
Chandler: There are snow cones! (Monica glares at him.) Snow cones! Yuck!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is there, waiting to tell Frank and Alice the news.]
(There is a knock on Rachel and Phoebes door.)
Chandler: You just thought of that in there?
Joey: Shes right in there. (motions to the living room)
Ross: Oh, oh there go the clothes.
Ross: But, Elizabeth and I are-are both adults and so I dont think theres really anything you can do about it.
Chandler: Honey, it is not a date! I havent talked to her in ten years! You cant just call up somebody you havent talked to in ten years and ask them for a favor. There are rules, yknow? You gotta, you got to put in some time.
Joey: He can still catch her! Come on, get out of there! (He opens the box) Get out of there!
Dr. Leedbetter: There may have been a-a joke or a limerick of some kind.
Gunther: I thought you were Chandler. But umm, one of who is over there.
Chandler: No, there were two.
Joey: (shocked) Thats mean! You really had me going there!
Gunther: (to Chandler) Oh, no-no, no-no-no, theres none of that in here.
Phoebe: No, you can't go there! You know how I feel about these "big massage places"! They're putting people like me out of business!
Estelle: Well, I think uhh, someone out there may have been bad mouthing you all over town.
Chandler: Thats still in there?!
Chandler: Oh? Did somebody miss me? Is there a child to raise poorly?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Everyone is there. Monica is watching stock prices on a business channel.]
Ross: Hey there little fella! Hey, uh-hey, why dont we get some shoes on ya, huh? Hey, why dont you show dad how you can put your shoes on, in your room! Yay!!
Rachel: (to the closed door) Hang in there. You hang in there. (Gives him the raspberry.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. The others are still there.]
[Scene: Carol and Susans, there is a knock on the door and Carol opens it to reveal Rachel.]
Chandler: All right, check it out. Check this out. It says here that theres a place you can go to rent videos of all the museums! (Reading from the book.) "Its almost as good as being there."
Janice: (entering) Hey there Ross!
Chandler: I dunno, aren't there tests for these things, right?
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are there]
Ross: I got held up at Dr. Gettleman's office. There was some guy that freaked everybody out.
Joey: Oh thats too bad. Ive kinda been saving up. (She just looks at him in horror.) Uh, are you sure theres no studies I can participate in?
Monica: Absolutely! (He goes to kiss her, but she stops him and rubs his head and says...) Now get out of here you!! (Pete leaves) (to the gang) Okay, Im running out of places I can touch him! Look, is there something wrong with me? I mean why am I only attracted to guys where theres no future? Either theyre too old, or theyre too young, and then theres Pete whos-whos crazy about me, and whos absolutely perfect for me, and theres like zip going on! I mean, seriously, does it sound like somethings wrong with me?!
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there as Jill enters.]
Ross: What? Oh, okay. Wait here. (Goes to get it, but before he gets there Aunt Millie sits down on it forcing him to pull it out from behind her which gets her attention.)
Phoebe: Are there anymore from the good batch? Cause we could just work off of those.
Joey: There you go! That's the spirit I'm looking for! What can we do? Huh? All right who's first? Huh? Ross?
Chandler: Theres a Mr. Bing!
[Joey's place. He goes to say something to Chandler in the other chair but no one's there. He goes to call Chandler but decides not to and throws the phone back down.]
Joey: And scene! Huh? Wasnt that fun? We did a little improv there. Yeah! Okay! So you-you-you-you were saying?
Susan: Oh yeah, Im so excited, Ive never been there.
Joey: I know, there are gonna be some pasty folks by the pool tomorrow! (A woman goes towards them)