words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the whole gang is there, the guys are watching football, the girls are cooking Thanksgiving dinner.]
The Guys: (reacting to a play) Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Awww!
The Guys: We will. (they dont move)
Monica: Okay, Rachel, you wanna put the marshmellows in concentric circles.
Joey: Hey, who wants to ah, throw the ball around a little, maybe get a little three on three going?
Chandler: Thats not true! I wanted to wear my bathrobe and eat peanut clusters all day. I wanted to start drinking in the morning. Dont say that I dont have goals!
Joey: Chandler, you have to start getting over her. All right, if you play, you get some fresh air, maybe itll take your mind off Janice, and if you dont play, everyone will be mad at you cause the teams wont be even. Come on.
Monica: Well, every, every Thanksgiving um, we used to have a touch football game called the Geller Bowl.
Monica: To score the winning touchdown, by the way.
Ross: Whoa, whoa, whoa, ho, ho, ho, you did not win the game, the touchdown didnt count, because of the spectacularly illegal, oh and by the way savage nose breaking.
Monica: (to Chandler and Joey) I won the game.
Ross: Oh yeah! Then how come you didnt get the Geller Cup?
Ross: Yes, it was the trophy you got if you won the game. But our Dad said, nobody won that game, and he was sick of our fighting, so he took the trophy and.... (pauses to collect himself, as he is on the verge of tears saying this) threw it in the lake.
Chandler: And was the curse lifted?
(they walk over to the sink and discuss it for a moment)
Chandler: But wait a minute though, how are we gonna get there, though, because my Mom wont let me cross the street.
[Scene: The Park, the gang is warming up for their football game.]
Ross: Here you go. (throws her the ball)
Rachel: (knocking it down instead of catching it) That almost hit me in the face.
(Phoebe kisses Rachel on the cheek, then joins her team.)
Ross: Okay. All right. So lets see, lets play from the trash can, to the lightpost. Right. Two hand touch, well kick off.
Chandler: Wow! Just like in the pros.
(Chandler is getting ready to kick off, Ross is holding the ball between his foot and finger.)
Chandler: The ball is Janice. The ball is Janice. (goes to kick the ball but kicks Rosss foot instead.)
(Chandler throws the ball to kick-off.)
Joey: I got it. (catches the ball)
(Joey runs up field and fakes out Ross and scores a touchdown. His team all celebrates the touchdown.)
[cut to later, Rosss team has the ball.]
Chandler: (from the shotgun) Hike!
(Chandler throws her the ball, which she drops.)
Chandler: Great! Now, the score is 7 to almost 7.
Ross: Okay, (to Chandler) this play, I want you to do a down and out to the right. Okay. Break!
[cut to later, Monicas team has the ball.]
(Monica throws the ball over Joeys head, its stopped from rolling away by a very beautiful woman.)
Ross: Okay, its second down. (turns away) Take all the second downs you need.
Chandler: Math!! Youre giving me math! All right, look y'know what, forget about it, you go for the girl, well see who gets her.
Ross: Chandler, I want you to run a post pattern to the left, okay. And sweetie..
Rachel: Yeah, I know, go long. Y'know, its like all Im doing is running back and forth from the huddle.
(Rachel takes the ball from his hands and bounces it off of Rosss forehead and Chandler catches the rebound.)
(Chandler runs around behind Ross, who pitches him the ball. Chandler runs upfield, and Joey knocks the ball out of his hands.)
(Joey starts to return the fumble and Chandler grabs Joeys shirt and rips it off of his back.)
Joey: What the hells the matter with you?! This is my favourite jersey.
Monica: All right, come on guys, lets go! Tie score, and were runnin out of time. Forty-two!! Thirty-eight!! Hike! (the timer sounds as Monica throws the ball to Phoebe.)
Phoebe: Oh I got it!! (catches the ball) Oh! Ew! Broken boob! Ow!
Ross: Uh, hello, the buzzer buzzed. It doesnt count.
Monica: After the snap!
Ross: Before the snap!
Monica: Dead leg!! (kicks him in the thigh.)
Ross: Ow! Ow! Okay, okay, fine, fine! All right, you wanna win by cheating, go ahead, all right. Phoebe the touchdown does count, you win.
Monica: No! Listen, Im not gonna go through this with you again, okay. Just once I wanna beat when you cant blame it on the broken nose, the buzzer, or the fact that you thought you were getting mono. Lets just call this, tie score and its halftime.
Monica: Because the winner gets this!
Ross: The Geller Cup.
[Scene: The park, the gang is returning to play the second half of the game.]
Ross: Okay, where in the hell did you get that?!
Monica: When Mom and Dad drove you to the hospital to get your nose fixed, I swam into the lake and fished it out.
Monica: Come on Phoebe, lets go! Come on, its time to get serious, huddle up. Joey, keep your head in the game.
Monica: All right look, if I take Chandler out of the running will you be able to focus?
Monica: All right, you just make sure that Chandler catches the ball, Ill take care of the rest.
(Joey throws the ball to Chandler)
(Chandler catches the ball and starts to run upfield.)
Ross: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whats with the tackling?
[Sequence 1: Monica throws the ball over Chandlers head to Joey who catches it for a touchdown, and starts to dance in celebration. Chandler then tackles him, and he starts to dance in celebration.]
[Sequence 2: Monica runs upfield and stops, waiting for a pass. Ross runs over and pulls her pants down, steps in front of her and intercepts the pass.]
[Sequence 4: Ross hikes the ball to Chandler, and the camera pans down to show Rachel standing deep in the end zone, playing with her gum. Something hits her on the head and she looks up to see where it came from.]
[Sequence 5: Monica hands the ball off to Phoebe, who runs up field and delivers a fore-arm shiver to Chandler, knocking him over and scores the touchdown, and she yells...]
Monica: Forty-two to twenty-one! Like the turkey, Ross is done!
Ross: Its no surprise that your winning, cause you got to pick first, so you got the better team.
Monica: Oh, what a great argument, exhaling! All right, y'know what, Ill prove it to you, okay. Ill trade you Joey for Rachel, and Ill still win the game.
Ross: What?! The guys against the girls? See, thats ridiculous Monica, because Im only down by three touchdowns.
[cut to the guys team.]
Margha: (coming over) The game is over, we eat now?
Chandler: No-no-no-no, the games not over, were just switching teams.
Joey: Yeah, Chandler finds me so intimdating that its better if were on the same team.
Joey: Ah well, the ah, Pennsylvania Dutch, come from Pennsylvania.
Chandler: And the other ah, Dutch people, they come on from somewhere near the Netherlands, right?
Joey: Nice try. (to Margha) See the Netherlands is this make believe place where Peter Pan and Tinker Bell come from.
Ross: Enough with geography for the insane, okay? Lets play some ball, guys.
Ross: Okay, y'know what, lets just cut to the chase here. Okay? Heidi, which of my boys do you like?
Margha: Well, if I had to chose right now, which by the way I find really weird, I would have to say, Chandler.
Joey: Wait a minute! Wait a minute! She obviously didnt understand the question.
Chandler: You hear that! That is her chose, mister Ill let you have her! I win! You suck! I rule all! A mini-wave in celebration of me!! (does the wave.)
Chandler: Y'know what, it doesnt matter, cause she picked me. Me! From now on I get the dates and you have to stay home on Saturday nights watching Ready, Set, Cook!
Ross: Save the breakthroughs for therapy, okay. The clock is ticking. We have no time, and we are losing, we are losing to girls.
[cut to the girls huddle.]
Monica: We have to do this. We are playing for women everywhere. Okay, just think about every lousy date that you ever had, okay, every guy who kept on the TV while youre making out...
[Sequence 1: Chandler is running past Phoebe with the ball, Phoebe flashes him, he stops and stares dumbfounded at her. Phoebe then runs up and takes the ball away.]
[Sequence 2: Phoebe throws the ball, and its intercepted by Joey, who starts to run up field. Rachel jumps on his back in order to try and tackle him, but she doesnt slow him down. Monica and Phoebe then both grab her legs in order to stop Joey, who still manages to fight through the tackle and score the touchdown.]
[Sequence 3: Chandler is running with the ball, Phoebe flashes him again, but Chandler covers his eyes, and keeps running. He then runs into a tree at the end of the field.]
[cut to the girls huddle]
Monica: All right, we still have a minute and a half to go, and were down by two points. Two points.... (she gets interrupted by the guys, who are doing a slow-motion high five.) Phoebe you do a button-hook again. Rachel, you go long.
Phoebe: Come on Mon, let her throw the ball.
(Phoebe snaps the ball to Monica, who pitches back to Rachel.)
The Guys: One-Mississippi! Two-Mississippi! Three-Mississippi!
(They all rush toward Rachel, who panics and runs away. She runs out of the park and up along the fence, she then comes back into the park and runs past Monica, as she gets to Monica, she throws the ball at Monica, and it hits her in the eye.)
Joey: (looking at the timer) Thirty seconds left on the timer!
Rachel: (on the verge of tears) Okay.
(In slow motion, Phoebe snaps the ball, Rachel goes long. Joey and Chandler and all over Phoebe, leaving Rachel wide open. Ross starts to rush Monica, who sees Phoebe is double covered, in desperation she throws to Rachel. We see flying through the air, and then Rachel running underneath it, then the ball, then Rachel again, then the ball, then Phoebe, Chandler, and Joey staring at it in shock. Then with the grace of Jerry Rice (no offense to Jerry Rice), Rachel catches the ball, and she stops and spikes the ball. Both Phoebe and Monica erupt in celebration.)
Chandler: Hey-hey-hey Rachel, funny thing. Actually, the ah, end zone starts at that pole, so youre five feet short, so we win!
Phoebe: Wait-wait-wait-wait! So, explain something to me though, if, if nobody tagged Rachel, then isnt the play still going.
(they all start to dive for the ball and Monica and Ross grab it at the same time.)
Chandler: Guys! Guys! Come on! Its Thanksgiving, its not important who wins or loses. The important thing is, (to Joey) the Dutch girl picked me! Me! Not you! Holland loves Chandler! Thank you, Amsterdam! Good night!!
[Scene: The park, its dark outside and Monica and Ross are still fighting over the ball.]
Ross: How come its always us left in the field holding the ball?
Monica: I dont know. I guess the other people just dont care enough.
(They both look up, and watch it start to snow. Then they both start fighting for the ball again.)
Ross: Gimme the this!
(She goes into the bathroom.)
Rachel: Go Monana! Well, you ladies are not the only ones living the dream. I get to go pour coffee for people I don't know. Don't wait up. (Exits)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the gang is there except for Rachel and Ross, who both come storming in. Rachel is still going off about Rosss secret marriage.]
Rachel: (she goes towards the others and she's very excited) Guys, you're not gonna believe this! I was just saying goodnight to Emma and she said her first words!!
Chandler: Panicking! And using the Internet to try to prove that Im related to Monica. How is she?
CHANDLER: It's a traditional Mexican custard dessert...Look talk to Monica, she's on the food committee.
Monica: No, umm, he met some girl at the coffee house.
Mr. Geller: No! Thank you! (Hugs Chandler) Monica, and Ross! I dont know what Im gonna do about the two of you!
Mike: Hey, Chandler, why dont we talk this over at the Ranger game tomorrow?
Joey: Wait up! (They both run to the bathroom.)
Rachel: Thats weird, she locked the door.
Ross: Hey listen man, about the stripper
CHANDLER: Well, she looks the exact opposite of that.
Joey: He's right, cause if you're just gonna, like, break his heart, that's the kind of thing that can wait.
Paul: So Ross was in college and decided to jump at the chance to take a young girl to her high school prom.
Phoebe: Ooh, the pizza guys here!
[Scene: Outside Central Perk, Phoebe is walking up and notices a car that is parked half on the curb and right in front of the door, making it difficult for people to enter Central Perk.]
Chandler: Y'know, I forgot the combination to this about a year ago? I just carry it around. Do you have any Chap Stick?
Another Scientist: And I need to flip the light switch on and off 17 times before I leave a room or my family will die.
ROSS: [Rachel, laughing, puts a hand on the guy's shoulder] Look at that, look at that, see how she's pushing him away and he won't budge. Alright, I'm gonna do something. [walks up in the middle of their conversation] Excuse me, are you Rachel?
[Scene: The Launderama, Rachel is there, waiting for Ross. An old woman takes Rachel's clothes off the machine and begins loading it with her things.]
Ross: Yeah, yeah. (opens the door) It wasnt every morning.
[cut to the living room where Mrs. Burkart is now performing.]
Joey: Yeah, yeah. I've got tons of stuff I could do. I'm gonna hit the beach, go swimming...
Ross: Uh actually Joey, its the Cretasous period.
Joey: (going out with the VCR in his hand) Well, I guess we'll never know whose it is!
Ross: (opening the door.) Hey!
[Scene: The rugby game, Ross is getting killed.]
Chandler: You are an amazing wife. (Monica shrugs) No really you're amazing you were actually gonna do this for me, I mean where do you find the strength and understanding over something like that.
Chandler: Shh! (To the guy behind the counter) Nice to see you again. (They tries to walk past him.)
Ross: Something couldve happened. All right? She-she really dug my slides. And-and she was definitely giving me the vibe.
Mr. Waltham: Its the Gellers!
Phoebe: Nothing! (Picks up and sets the chick down on the floor.) (To the chick.) This is not over!
Chandler: Yknow what? You can say goodbye to the tan ones.
(The whole gang enters.)
[Monica answers the door. Its Fun Bobby.]
Ross: Why don't we just put 'poor little Tooty' out in the hall?
Joey: Is that why you bought all this stuff?! (Chandler makes a face like "Well, kinda.") Well, yknow what I will not watch your TV, I will not listen to your stereo, and theres a cinnamon raisin loaf in the new bread maker that Im not gonna eat! You know why?!
The Fireman: The next time you want to dump a fire alarm in a trash chute, dont wrap it in a blanket that says, "Property of Phoebe Buffay not Monica."
(The rest of the gang runs away, except for Ross whos tramped inside his car. To hide he puts the top up as Monica, Rachel, and Joey come running past.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning, Monica is getting the door.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is whining to Chandler about the tickets.]
Chandler: (changing subject) OK, so at this point, the dealer...
Eric: Absolutely. (They kiss and Phoebe heads for the door.) I love the way you kiss.
Rachel: Oh, please, I don't care about you enough to bug me. In fact, from now on, I'm going take the high road. And I'm going be very very nice to you, you "momma's boy", starting right now.
Mr. Geller: This bill for my half of the wedding. its insane.
(The customer turns out to be )
Rachel: All right, you know what? I am not leaving here, until you call that plane back!! (She pounds her hand on the counter twice. The ticket agent counters by placing the closed sign on the counter and tapping it twice.)
Rachel: Oh, please!Honey, just the fact that you want me here to support you, I'm...OH MY GOD!Is that Christian Sanders?He's so gorgeous!
Ross: (turning around.) Umm, uh, I was just telling the guys
JANITOR: Of course they're gonna say he's dead. They don't want the bad publicity. It's all a great big cover-up. Do you have any idea how high up this thing goes?
Kathy: (going over to the box) Chandler?
[Scene: Chandler and Joeys Bathroom: Chandler is watching the duck swim in the bathtub.]
Emily: I left a bra drying on the shower rod, you dont think your son will think its yours and be horribly traumatised?
[Scene: Central Perk. The four guys are returning after getting the hat back.]
Monica: Thats right. (A noise comes from the living room.) Did you hear something?
Monica: Hello? (Listens) Oh yes, one minute please. (To Phoebe) Its for you. Its the fire inspector.
Joey: Oh, heres where I win all my money back! (Gets up and heads for the buffet table with Chandler in tow.)
Rachel: Not working with me, Joe! Here's the thing: lately I have been having thoughts (pauses) musings, if you will!
Joey: (Holding a magazine) Wow! The new Playboy!
Ross: (getting up) Okay! Fine! Fine! If-if this is what you think, forget about the whole three divorce thing! Okay, I-Ill go to my lawyers office right now and get this marriage annulled! Okay?! Because she means nothing to me! Noth(leans down to Megs ear)Nothing!!
Monica: Don't stare. Now she just finished throwing his clothes off the balcony, now there's just a lot of gesturing and arm-waving, (shows Rachel gesturing with hands in front of her chest), Ok, that is either, "How could you?" or, "Enormous breasts!" Here he comes!
[Scene: Joey and Rachels, Joey is at the counter eating a bowl of Frosted Flakes.]
Monica: Aw, Im sorry sweetie that she doesnt feel the same way.
Phoebe: (Angrily.) Hey, were the hell have you been?!
Chandler: Oh, I think I have the cash.
Chandler: So, the fact that I am a doctor, and my wife’s a reverend, that’s important to you?
MRS GREEN: The only man I've ever been with is your father.
Monica: (Remotely turning off the television) okay, Pheebs, theyre gone.
Monica: No, that is what the game is.
Monica: (Interrupting) Oh, what about that guy over there? (She points at another guy and Gunther is deflated.) Remember? That is the guy you flirted with at the counter that time.
Rachel: No! No! Seriously, whats wrong with the dog?! Wait a minute, what are you doing home so early? What happened to your date?
Ross: No! No, no, no, no, okay, it wasn't the swing's fault. It was my fault and kind of that (point to the kid that kicked him) kids fault. Who is still laughing. Nice.
(Joey and Chandler both come into the hallway.)
Chandler: Yeah, I believe I was talking to Joey, alright there, Mother-Kisser? (Goes to the counter)
Phoebe: So, what? Monica, we have the winning ticket! My psychic said I was gonna win, remember?
Joey: Oh, it was so amazing. After the (pause) love making...
(Cut to Joey watching TV in the corner. He makes an extravagant gesture of disappointment.)
Chandler: (admiring his work) This, this actually is a (Does the same gibberish word from before.)
Phoebe: Hey Ross! Doesnt Ben go to the Smithfield Day School?
Monica: Well discuss it, in the morning! (Slams the door shut.)
The Vendor: Good choice.
JOEY: Woah. Why do you get to keep the table?
(Rachel tries to get Monica's attention to tell her Steve is stoned. She pretends to drag on a joint, and Monica thinks she's giving her the 'OK' signal. Then Rachel does it again, inhaling deeply this time. Monica waves it off as though she doesn't believe it.)
(The phone rings and Monica answers it.)
Roy: Well, look - it's not my fault if you're too uptight to appreciate the male form in all it's glory.
MONICA: I meant, why don't you take Richard to the game? What?
Receptionist: Phoebe, your next client's in the waiting room.
RACHEL: Okay, now that is the third time someone has said something like that to me today.
Chandler: so then the farmer says, "Thats not a cow and youre not milking it." (Everyone laughs.)
Chandler: Its the theme from Good Will Humping.
Chandler: Yeah, thats like the most ugliest dress Ive ever seen. Wh-why do you to return it?
(Joey and Ross enter causing Chandler to quickly hide the brochure behind his back.)
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there but Ross and Joey. Gunther hands them the bill, and Chandler gives some money to pay it.]
Mrs. Geller: (To Mr. Geller) This is worse than when he married the lesbian.
Minister: You may kiss the bride.
[He walks out of the bedroom and Monica starts to remake the bed.]
(Ross and Emily make it to the lobby.)
Chandler: Well, I was cleaning out the closet and I found some pictures of them... being used.
Phoebe: (looking at the clock) Oh wow, three hours and still no baby. Ugh, the miracle of birth sure is a snooze fest.