words in movies
CHANDLER: No, see, I'm trying this new screening thing. You know, I figure if I'm always answering the phone, people'll think I don't have a life. My god, Rodrigo never gets pinned.
(MACHINE--JOEY'S VOICE): Here comes the beep, you know what to do.
JADE: Oh, you know, the usual, teaching aerobics, partying way too much. Oh, and in case you were wondering, those are my legs on the new James Bond poster.
CHANDLER: Um, absolutely. Uh, how 'bout tomorrow afternoon? Do you know uh, Central Perk in the Village, say, five-ish?
CHANDLER: I'm hoping that when Bob doesn't show up, she will seek comfort in the open arms of the wry stranger at the next table.
CHANDLER: Ok, while Ross is on the phone, everybody owes me 62 bucks for his birthday.
CHANDLER: Hey, come on, we got the gift, the concert, and the cake.
RACHEL: Do you guys ever get the feeling that um, Chandler and those guys just don't get that we don't make as much money as they do?
MONICA: I'm at work, ordinary day, you know, chop chop chop, sauti, sauti, sauti. All of a sudden, Leon, the manager, calls me into his office. It turns out they fired the head lunch chef, and guess who got the job.
ROSS: Go over there and tell that woman the truth.
CHANDLER: No, you keep the pack. I'm all cried out today.
ROSS: Ok, ok, here is to my sister, the newly-appointed head lunch chef--
WAITER: Well, when you do, just let me know. I'll be right over there on the edge of my seat.
ROSS: Well, pretty incredible according to the message she left you on my machine. Hey, Chandler, why is this woman leaving a message for you on my machine?
MONICA: Yes, I will start with the carpaccio, and then I'll have the grilled prawns.
WAITER: And for the gentleman?
JOEY: Yeah, I'll have the Thai chicken pizza. But, hey, look, if I get it without the nuts and leeks and stuff, is it cheaper?
RACHEL: Ok, I will have the uh, (whispers) side salad.
WAITER: (whispers) And what will that be on the side of?
PHOEBE: Um, I'm gonna have a cup of the cucumber soup, and, um, take care.
CHANDLER: I will have the uh, Cajun catfish.
JOEY: 'Cause it's always somethin', you know, like Monica's new job, or the whole Ross's birthday hoopla.
ROSS: Wha--? Whoa, hey, I don't want my birthday to be the source of any kind of negative--there's gonna be a hoopla?
RACHEL: Basically, there's the thing, and then there's the stuff after the thing.
MONICA: If it makes anybody feel better, then we can just forget the thing, and we'll just do the gift.
ROSS: G-gift? The thing's not the gift?
CHANDLER: No, the thing was, we were gonna go see Hootie and the Blowfish.
ROSS: Hootie and the--oh my. I, I can catch them on the radio.
PHOEBE: No, now I feel bad. You wanna go to the concert.
ROSS: No, look, hey, it's my birthday, and the important thing is that we all be together.
ROSS: Not at the concert.
CHANDLER: So, the ebola virus. That's gotta suck, huh?
CHANDLER: Gee, Monica, what's in the bag?
MONICA: Yeah, we switched meat suppliers at work, and the new guys gave me the steaks as sort of a thank-you.
ROSS: But wait, there's more. Hey, Chandler, what is in the envelope?
CHANDLER: By the way, this didn't seem so dorky in the hall.
CHANDLER: Why, it's six tickets to Hootie and the Blowfish! The Blowfish!
PHOEBE: I'm just gonna pass on the concert, 'cause I'm just not in a very Hootie place right now.
MONICA: Guys, we bought the tickets.
ROSS: Still doing the screening thing?
MACHINE: Here comes the beep, you know what to do.
JADE: Hey, Bob, it's Jade. Listen, I just wanted to tell you that I was really hurt when you didn't show up the other day, and just so you know, I ended up meeting a guy.
(at the concert)
MONICA: You know, the guys are probably having a great time.
CHANDLER: I can't believe the guys missed this.
STEVE: Oh, yeah, my firm represents the band.
STEVE: How are you? Look, you guys wanna meet the group? Come on. So, are you one of the ones who fooled around with my dad?
ROSS: Uh, aside from that, the whole evening was pretty much a bust.
RACHEL: On someone's lips? Where'd you get the hickey?
ROSS: It wasn't so much a party as...a gathering of people, with food, and music, and, and the band.
JOEY: You partied with Hootie and the Blowfish?
CHANDLER: Yes, apparently Stevie and the band are like this.
MONICA: That would be the work of a Blowfish.
MONICA: Leon, Leon. Shhh! Guys. Wait, I don't understand. Those steaks were just a gift from the meat vendor. That was not a kick back. I'll just replace them and we can forget the whole thing. What corporate policy? No. Yeah. All right. I just got fired.
MACHINE: Here comes the beep, you know what to do.
Pete: Well, if that were true, Id dating my Aunt Ruth. And the two times we went out were just plain awkward. (to Rachel) Come on, you think she should go out with me, dont you?
CHANDLER: You're welcome. Hey Joey, thanks for parking the car [passes the dollar back].
Rachel: Well then how come youre still at a job that you hate, I mean why dont you quit and get the fear?
Ross: (not wanting to tell her) Uh-oh, uh-oh, the laundry's done. It's, uh, it's a song. The laundry song that we sing. (singing) Uh-oh the laundry's done, uh-oh, uh-oh.
Monica: All right, I'm out of oven space. I'm gonna turn on Joey's. Please, watch him! Do not let Joey eat any of the food!
Joey: Man! When you said it was a problem about your boss and the baby I figured it was something about maternity leave.
Chandler: Well, aren't we Mr. "The glass is half empty."
Phoebe: I just-I just started walking around not knowing what to do next, yknow? I-I started asking people on the street if they wanted massages. Then these policemen, thought I was a whore too. Its been a really bad day, whore wise.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is watching Wheel of Fortune, the puzzle is showing _oun_ Rush_ore.]
RACHEL: At the Copa, Copa Cabana (everyone joins in) The hottest spot north of Havana. At the Copa, Coo-pa Ca-ban-a, music and fashion were always the passion, at the Copa....
ROSS: Well, Monica keeps changin' the channel.
Kathy: (opening the door) Hey.
Rachel: Well I was gonna tell him that Im-Im gonna have the baby and he can be as involved as he wants.
(The girls are stumped)
Message: (Phoebe's voice) "Hello. Th-this is the pigeon from the balcony calling to apologise" (they all turns to look at Phoebe) "I sh.. I shouldn't have knocked the tickets out of the pretty lady's hand. It-it was all my fault. Not hers. Bye. Coo."
RACHEL: What was the book?
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler and Rachel are on their knees with forks trying to salvage what they can of the cheesecake off of the floor.]
Chandler: See Joe, not that thats not grrreat! But, one of the cool things about having somebody we know perform the ceremony is that it can be about us! Yknow, it can be more personal. You can tell stories about us!
[Scene, The Park: Phoebe and Rachel are getting ready to go running]
Joanna: Rachel, I need the Versachi invoice. (to Chandler) Hello! You dont work for me.
(She opens the door to reveal Ross with a pencil mark from his forehead to his chin.)
MONICA and ROSS: In the bank.
Phoebe: Oh yknow whats sadder than this? Bambi. I cried for three days with that movie. No wait two! Because on the third day my mother killed herself so I was partly crying for that.
ROSS: Ok, we were sitting over there playing on the floor and he grabs the table and he pulls himself up. He pulled himself up. Standing man. I'm sorry you guys missed it but I did tape it so it you guys want to see it.
[Joey shows them the torn-up newspaper.]
(Phoebe reaches into the trash can, pulls one out, and hands it to Rachel.)
Monica: Nope, she doesn't have to, I found out who the father is.
ROSS: No. You're just gonna have to accept the fact that you're just friends now, OK, you're not... rommmates anymore.
Ross: Oh, thank you. (She goes to kiss him, but he holds her coat up between their faces to stop her.) Hey, hey. (opens the door, sees Rachel, and hides Chloe behind the door) Rachel!!!!
CHANDLER: [enters] Ding dong, the psycho's gone.
Joey: From now on, its gonna be Joey and Ross, best friends. (They shake hands.) Okay! Were gonna be the new Joey and Chandler.
Ross: Which is fine! Because you just turned(Removes two candles from the cake)twenty-eight!
MONICA: Dad, I'm the twinkie.
Phoebe: Okay, she would love that! Y'know, 'cause you know all the clean places to eat.
Chandler: No, no, Ross and Rachel will be back soon and then I gotta go to the office (Pulls another balloon out of his mouth) Am I producing them?
Chandler: Ross! You gotta stop! Okay?! You cant just stare through the peep hole for three hours! Youre gonna get peep eye!
JOEY: What happened to the foosball?
Charlie: Please, I've been crazed all day! I had a meeting with the Dean, and my syllabus for summer school is due and I'm writing the Foreword for a friend's book...
JOEY: Hey, if she were marrying a guy, she'd be like the worst lesbian ever.
The Doctor: What do we got here?
(Chandler tries to do the same thing but the pen hits him in the head.)
Realtor: Take as long as you want. Just let me know when you're through. (she leaves the room)
Rachel: Thanks, you can just put it on the table.
Monica: Well, if I had them taken out, then I wouldn't be able to do this. (she pushes Chandler on the couch and brushes her hair and shells against Chandler's chest) You like that, right? (again, she brushes her hair against his chest and hums...)
Cashier: (looking at the completed address card) Oh, I love your neighborhood. Theres a great gym right around the corner from your building.
Rachel: What? Ross and Charlie? (Joey nods) Wow! She's really making her way through the group, huh? Ah, who am I to talk?
Joey: (entering) Hey! (Goes to the fridge.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler are there. Ross is still talking to the beautiful woman.]
ROSS: What, the word hi?
MNCA: Bobby and I are going away for the weekend, remember?
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Joey's having breakfast; Phoebe enters the room carrying her wedding dress.]
RACHEL: Did you just break the radiator?
Phoebe: Youre thing. Youre thing. Yknow? Youre the guy who gets divorced.
[Rachel and Tag go into the hall.]
Rachel: Sure, Ill just sit next to the trans-sexual from purchasing.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler and Monica are sitting at the kitchen table and are still trying to decide what to do about Janice.]
Rachel: Oh God, oh, and then she told the funniest story...
Chandler: Rachel, what is the deal with you and doctors, anyway? Was, like, your father a doctor?
Malcom: These are my night vision goggles. This is the book I pretend to read when I'm watching her in the park. And these are Mad Lips, they're just for fun.
Chandler: Well I just, thought maybe you'd wanna book some time with the best you'd ever had.
[Scene: Mr. Geller's birthday party. Monica is in the bathroom and Richard comes in.]
Rachel: You guys, Im doing the best I can, anyone else is welcome to try.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, the baby shower is continuing as Rachel walks over to Monica and Phoebe.]
(from 1.09 - "The One Where Underdog Gets Away")
Chandler: How do you feel about the, "I really did forgot the present, please forgive me" not fake out?
Phoebe: I do! I do! I do! (Chases her into the hall, but Rachel doesnt stop.) I do! (Gives up.) Ugh, like I can really chase you. Im carrying a litter.
RACHEL: What's the matter with you?
Chandler: I cant believe you didnt tell me! You know that the two pillars of marriage are openness and honesty!
Monica: Well what is it? What is it? If its gonna help bring the baby here, like today. I mean, I think you should do it.
PHOEBE: Thanks. [gets out of the cab]
Rachel: Alright, enough, enough, come on. Let's just all go in at the same time.
Chandler: (To Monica) Wow! Listen, we had a good run. You know, what was it? Four? Five months? I mean, that's more than most people have in a lifetime! So, good-bye, take care, bye-bye then! (He kisses her and starts to climb out the balcony window)
Ross: We got a head, we got shoulders, we got arms, we got, oh, look at the little fingers, oh, and a chest, and a stomach. It's a boy, definitely a boy! All right! Ok, legs, knees, and feet. Oh, oh. He's here. He's a person.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Time lapse. Jack is still on the couch, picking his teeth with his feet on the table. Phoebe and Judy are sitting on the table looking at him. Ross and Chandler are sitting by the window talking. Rachel and Joey are in the kitchen fooling with Rachels trifle. Monica walks into the living room from the kitchen.]
Carol: Uh, I don't think she's in the bathroom. Her coat is gone.
Monica: Oh, my mom called, theyre gonna run our engagement announcement in the local paper, so were looking for a good picture of us.
Chandler: (entering, very upset) Ok Tommy, that's enough mourning for you! Here we go, bye bye!! (he shoves him out the door)
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey and the girls are sitting at the couches.]
RACHEL: Oh they're in the top drawer. Hurry.
Phoebe: (checks) I never get calls!! (Answers the phone) Hello?
Joey: Listen also were uh, were watching the game here Saturday night, if people want to come over.
[Everyone gasps. The show ends.]
Professor Spafford: If you'll excuse me I'm going to use the restroom. (he goes away)
RACHEL: What's the matter?
Ross: Listen. Oh hey, hey, the important thing was that she meant, she meant nothing to me!
Monica: You don't know everything. Did you know that I'm going out with Rachel tonight instead of you? Hmm? And did you know that the only baby around here is you?! And did you know that I can't even look at you right now?! (She storms out.)
Monica: (pulling the plate back) Oh-ho! But not in here! Cant eat em in bed, remember? No crumbies!
Phoebe: I'd say that chair's taking the brunt.
Chandler: Theres a Phoebe on my sandwich! (He walks away, giving the sandwich to Phoebe.)
Second Message: "Listen, oh... it turns I got the last spot. I'm really sorry man, it was a lot of fun working with you. Give me a call if you want."
Phoebe: (looking out the window) Oh, look! There's Monica and Chandler! (Starts yelling.) Hey! Hey, you guys! Hey! (Chandler and Monica start taking each other's clothes off.) Ohh!! Ohh! Ahh-ahhh!!
Phoebe: Stating the obvious, but thank you. And its not weird is it.
Ross: Ask them if it would be faster if we cut the baby’s face off the penis, so we can put it on the bunny. (pause). That is a weird sentence!
Sandy: Y'know, when I saw you at the store last week, it was probably the first time I ever mentally undressed an elf.
Rachel: What the... DIAL IT DOWN! (Joey goes to sit on the bed) Listen, ok, and maybe they're crazy thoughts, but sometimes I do, I have, I've been thinking about... you know, us! (looks at Joey, who's totally distraught) Ok, dial it up a little!
Rachel: Ross, things aren't gonna be weird between us, right? I mean was that just the stupidest thing, me telling you that?
RACHEL: Why the voice.
MONICA: Ross, the heat!
Ross: (on phone) Item J437-A, color: winterberry. (Theres a knock on the door as he hangs up the phone. He answers it to Mona.) Hi umm, listen come here, come in. (She does so.) Im so-so sorry about yesterday. I-Im really sorry. Its just that I (He picks up the pink shirt.)
Joey: Oh, you told her you broke all the plates, huh? (Chandler walks back, looking angrily at Joey)