words in movies
Rachel: What Phoebe? Wait! One time he caught me smoking he said if he ever saw me doing that again hed make me eat the entire pack.
Phoebe: Gosh. Im not gonna let that man make you eat your baby. (They both sit down by the rest of the gang and Phoebe recognizes a man by the window.) Oh. Hey! Who is that guy? I think I know him.
Chandler: I thought we werent gonna have bachelor/bachelorette parties! Yknow, we agreed that it was a silly tradition.
Joey: Oh yeah, that was a pretty good night.
Chandler: I cant believe you didnt tell me! You know that the two pillars of marriage are openness and honesty!
Monica: Ugh, I knew giving you that book was gonna come back and bite me in the ass!
Phoebe: Yeah, I dont eat that either.
Dr. Green: 74?! I ordered the 75! Thats a magnificent wine! The 74 is sewage! Why would you bring me sewage?! (The waiters dumbfounded) Is that a hard question? Are you an idiot? Is that why youre a waiter?
Rachel: (To Phoebe) In case you didnt notice, that is a scary man.
Rachel: Hey, that is the babys problem. (Dr. Green returns.) Oh, everything okay with the waiter?
Dr. Green: Thats true.
Ross: Yeah, a lot of my students do that.
Chandler: Well, you have to honest with her! Otherwise you may think that youre going down the same path, but youre really going down different ones.
Joey: Im gonna take that book and beat you to death with it.
Chandler: Honey! Thats crazy! I dont want you to get me a stripper
Phoebe: Im sorry I wont be able to make it to your imaginary wedding, but Im really busy that day. Yeah, I already have a unicorn baptism and a leprechaun bar mitzvah.
Dr. Green: Stay calm?!! How do you expect me to stay calm?! This is unacceptable Rachel! And I wanna know why?!! Is it because that punk Ross wont marry you?! Thats it! Is that it?!
Joey: Thats her! Okay, come on! (They go over and open the door.)
Chandler: Thats me.
Stripper: So is that a bedroom? (Points to the guestroom.)
Chandler: That was weird.
Joey: Yeah, thats one naked hooker!
Ross: Uh thats an eighteenth century Indian artifact from Calcutta.
Dr. Green: Oh? Really? Thats what my daughter means to you? Nothing?
Ross: (to Mona) Oh but not that way. I mean I mean Im not in love with her. I love her like a, like a friend.
Dr. Green: Oh really? Thats how treat a friend? You get her in trouble and then refuse to marry her?
Hooker: Uh, no. But I could pretend to strip, but thats gonna cost extra. Okay, heres the extras, handcuffs, spanking (Chandler grunts for her not to continue and Joey pulls him back into the kitchen.)
Joey: Maybe Monicas playing a joke on ya. Yknow? Getting her own husband a hooker, thats pretty funny.
Chandler: That is funny, maybe for my birthday shell murder someone.
Chandler: Oh actually, Id rather you Yeah, go ahead. Were gonna have to burn that room down anyway.
Ross: Hey! I did not dump Rachel! (To Mona) Nor are we still together. (The phone rings and Ross goes to answer it, only hes trapped behind the apothecary table by Dr. Green.) Can I just (Dr. Green glares at him.) Why dont we just let the machine get that?
Monica: Yeah! Hey! Thanks for getting me that girls number.
Monica: Is that, is that what they call strippers sometimes?
Stu: Either that or shes just the best, most expensive date I ever had.
Chandler: Why would she do that?
Chandler: Yeah, I miss that too. I tell you what; from now on well make time to hang out with each other.
Phoebe: Id better go. (She goes and sits down in the La-Z-Boy E-cliner 3000, the chair that Sit magazine called chair of the year, and they both look at her.) Just over here: I dont want to miss the fight.
Rachel: Oh okay, Ill fix that to. Whats her e-mail address?
Phoebe: Thats it?! You call that a fight? Come on! "We were on a break!" "No we werent!" What happened to you two?!
Mona: Oh good, youre here. Yeah, and I was worried that it was going to be uncomfortable.
Rachel: I know Mona, just hear me out. First of all, Im so sorry about my father yelling at you, but I heard you totally held your own. Youre gonna have to tell me how you did that.
Mona: How can I be sure on that?
Rachel: Right! But, none of that compared to how kind and-and how gentle and thoughtful he is. (Rubbing his shoulder.)
Ross: I know and I was going to, but I thought it was better that you heard it from Rachels father. Look I I made a mistake, but its only because I really, really like you. Really!
Dr. Green: (on phone, not hearing her) theres gonna be a wedding! (Joey enters from his room and goes to get a beer from the fridge.) Thats unacceptable Rachel! What the hell does love have to do with it anyway?! There are more important things in a marriage other than love! (Joey hears something and looks around for the source.) constantly thinking about things! You have to think about the consequences of your decision. (Joey finds that the sound is coming from the phone and puts it to his ear.)
Chandler: Hes not supposed to ask my girlfriend to marry him! Im supposed to do that!
Joey: Well, you're way sounds a lot better than mine. (Thinks about it.) Yeah. Yeah! It's not that I'm a bad actor
Hums While He Pees: Me too! Im sorry that guy in the subway licked your neck.
Monica: Yeah, is that okay?
Ross: I could, yeah, I can do that.
Joey: (approvingly) Oh! ok, yeah, I think I can do that. Yeah ok, there's this party scene coming up.. and Olivia and her husband are there and all Drake wants to do is grab her and kiss her, but he can't... And that makes me think about all those times when I wanted to grab you and kiss you, but you didn't know so I would just pretend everything was cool, but really, it was killing me.
Phoebe: You guys make a very attractive couple. (The camera cuts to a shot of the picture and we see that Monica is posing with Joey instead of Chandler.)
Wendy: Oh. - What's *that* like?
Ross: Thats right, I love you! And-and Im gonna play with you all the time.
Chandler: But we don't do that.
Phoebe: Hey, dont call him that! His name is Spackel Back Harry!
Monica: Eh, we weren't that close anyway!
Ross: Thats Daddy?! But doesnt it bother you? Youre a waitress.
Monica: Eh, you work for that.
Chandler: Yes! And look, now that I know if I got some extra stuff lying around can we, can we share the closet.
Rachel: And also, you know I uh, I was thinking about what you said, you know, about the whole sex thing and... it's probably not a great idea to go down that road again.
Monica: You thought about that?
Waiter: It�s just that we do have some large parties waiting.
[Scene, A Restaurant, Rachel is on her date, drunk, and is leaving that answering machine message.]
Phoebe: Aren't we done with that?
(Shortly after that, Chandler enters.)
Chandler: Yes! And thats why Im under the table. Celebrating.
Chandler: (singing) The sunll come out tomorrow! Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow (The girls start laughing, and in a deep voice) therell be sun.
Chandler: Now that Rachel's gone?
Ross: Yeah. The bartender said that they split up into two search parties, the herbivores and the carnivores. (pause) You know, we as a group are not the coolest.
Phoebe: (interrupting) Uh-huh, me too. Ross, maybe I should've specified that I'd be needing a grown up doctor.
Chandler: (yelling from the changing room) All right! I found one that fits!
Tag: (interrupting) Uh Mr. Zelner, Im the one who filled in that evaluation.
Janice: I will go for that drink.
Ross: (grabbing back his coffee) If the place you are referring too is being in love, then she is in the same place as me because I am not in that place!
Joey: Yeah, I called the lady about that. I told her I was just joking. She was pretty nice about that.
Rachel: (sitting down next to Chandler) Im training to be better at a job that I hate, my life officially sucks.
Chandler: Picturing that tree?
Ross: Soon hell be able to call you, that lady he knew who got fired.
Monica: Right there! That was so fake!
Joey: Ok, wait wait wait wait a minute wait a minute, I mean Rach, I mean if if... . If Hugsy means that much to Emma then... well she can have him.
Rachel: I dont care! All right, yknow what Im just upset that Im getting nowhere with Joshua thatyknow what still, you do not meet someone and go flitting off to Vermont!
Phoebe: Pay the caterer! Look, I've had a lot of jobs, okay, and there are some people who just always try to get out of paying. It's either, you know, "that massage wasn't long enough, or, "I don't recognize any of those songs," or, you know, "these sombreros aren't big enough. Bad little white girl!"
Gavin: Yes, I feel that you are a little annoying.
Ross: well.. its just. its just in that case, then um. Emma would go to my parents.
Rachel: Okay, but if it only happened that one time, how come we found your underwear in our apartment the other day?
Phoebe: I dont know, I hardly ever say that about people.
Rachel: Ok, I know this is gonna sound really stupid, but I feel that if I can do this, you know, if I can actually do my own laundry, there isn't anything I can't do.
Monica: Hey-hey-hey. You wanna hear something that sucks.
Monica: Because I know that you think the lottery is "boohaki" but we're all here and gonna watch the numbers and have fun. And you're my brother, and I want you to be a part of this.
Joey: (Voice cracking) Well thats like summer in a bowl.
Monica: All right, you just make sure that Chandler catches the ball, Ill take care of the rest.
Ross: No, its Its not that. Umm, now what Im going to say to you, Im not saying as your friend. Okay? Im-Im saying as it as Monicas older brother.
Monica: You ordered a stripper for the shower?! That is totally inappropriate!
Phoebe: That wouldn't stand in the way of a true pianist.
(The waitress lets her in as Monica is about to throw a lobster into a pot of boiling water (Although, she hasnt taken off the rubber bands that hold the claws, so she cant be that good of a chef). Anyway, guess who the Colonel is by the following phrase.)
Ross: Oh, yeah, yeah that�s Michelle.
Rachel: Do you have anything that would... get us out of them?
JOEY: Hey, hey, I just figure Joseph's the kinda guy that likes to mix it up. Ya know, get in there, ruffle some feathers.
Rachel: Wow. She does that a lot!
Rachel: How do you know about that?
Michelle: You feel that too? Oh, I thought that was just me!
Rachel: Come on see, she doesnt look that bad.
Rachel: Whoa, how do you know about that?
Joey: Nice!! Yeah! Is that part of your resolution, your new thing for today?
Chandler: Oh, so thats why the priest threw holy water on me. (theres no reaction from Joey) Okay, listen, you have to cheer up! Okay? You should come out with Ross and me, I mean anything is better than sitting around here crying all day about Kate.
Joey: Or... just get a card that has a poem already in it.
Monica: Sure, we'll do that. What are you up to?
Joey: She was all crying. She-she said you guys want different things, and that and that she needed time to think.
Joey: Look, Ross, really its-its no big deal. Yknow you wear a white coat, I wear a blue blazer, if that means we cant be friends at work, then so be it. Yknow, hey I understand. Yknow? Hey, when Im in a play and youre in the audience, I dont talk to you, right? So its yknow, its uh, its cool. Ill see you tomorrow. (Leaves)
Phoebe: How do you even know a woman like that?
Joey: Yeah, you know, it's not that fun.
Chandler: I don't do that.
Ross: Thatll be a neat trick, when youre, (looks at the script) when youre dead!
Rachel: Really? What's that like?
Chandler: Ooh, she's asleep, that means we can...
Rachel: Hey Mon, lets give Pete a chance Come on, he was funny, he seems really nice, and that check thing was adorable.
Waiter #2: What are you doing? Are you trying to get him to stay? Because you can't do that.
Monica: Well, that was weird. You were loud, and I was fast.
Phoebe: Yeah That does sound great. I'm going to get the phone. (They both get up.)
Ross: That bad?
Ross: Why does everyone keep saying that?
Ross: Female body inspector? What size is that?
Phoebe: No. They said you 'Weren't believable as a human being.' So, you can work on that.
Rachel: Well, youve been here for two months now and your boss is required to hand in a performance evaluation. But yknow, there is one thing that I have yet to evaluate. (She turns around and sweeps the stuff off of her desk and hops up onto it.)
PHOEBE: Listen. You are not going to believe this but, that is not me singing on the video.
Monica: Oh my God! Oh, this is incredible! Ohh! (she rolls over and kisses him on the cheek) All right, y'know what? Im just gonna roll right into that office and-and quit!
Phoebe: I haven't exactly had a normal life and I never really felt I was missing out on anything but it just feels that now it's my turn some of the regular stuff.
Rachel: I know, that old lady at the end was ready to take you home.
Judge: Now it also says here that you lied about your sexual preference before marriage?
Rachel: No, so I dont have to get married until Im 33! Thats three years, thats three whole yearsOh, wait a minute though. Ill need a year and a half to plan the wedding, and Id like to know the guy for a year, year and a half before we get engaged Which means I need to meet the guy by the time Im thirty.
RACHEL: Ok, we can do this now, can't we Ben? Yes we can, yes we can. [finishes the diaper] There. I did it. I did it. Look at that, oh, stays on and everything. Hi.
Monica: Is that a bit you guys do?
Monica: We don't do that! Tell her we don't do that!
Chandler: But you did like us. And you should. My wife's an incredible woman. She's loving and devoted and caring. And don't tell her I said this but the woman's always right... I love my wife more than anything in this world. And I... It kills me that I can't give her a baby... I really want a kid. And when that day finally comes, I'll learn how to be a good dad. But my wife... she's already there. She's a mother... without a baby... Please?
Rachel: I made the mistake of telling him that I was pregnant.
Monica: Well, if you really think about it, I mean four days is not that long. I mean, I see you Monday before you go to work, and I see you Thursday when you get back, and I always work late on Tuesdays, so really if you think about it, it's really just one day. And well, if we can't make it one day, we've got real problems my friend.
Joey: Dude, youre not even man enough to order the channel that carries the sport.
Chandler: And that would have made the official party line. (Joey nods) Monica and I are having a little financial trouble.
[Scene: Cole-Geddes Casting Agency, Joey is there on his audition and thinking about that 2,000 bucks for the twins study.]
Monica: ...And then we throw your body in the water... Gee, that does sound fun.
Ross: Like em, like em? Or, Id like to get store credit for that amount like em?
Phoebe: Yeah I get that.
CHANDLER: Well, doesn't the fact that I wore the bracelet even though I hated it say something about our friendship and how much it means to me?
Rachel: No thats just(Laughs)Thats just cause Im such a good messer!