words in movies
Chandler: Thats okay Pheebs, were not having a party or anything, so you dont have to get us
Monica: (interrupts him) If someone wants to give us a present, we dont want to deprive them of that joy.
Phoebe: You mean the one that my grandmother made me swear on her deathbed that I would never let out of our family?
Monica: Okay. Im gonna be the mom that makes the worlds best chocolate chip cookies.
Joey: Why would I do that? It took three guys to get the thing in there!
Joey: Oh, its great! Its a great place to just kinda, sit, hang around, drink a few beers, eat some chips. (He says that as he sits, hangs around, drinks a beer, and eats a chip.)
Chandler: Well, its good that you finally have a place to do that.
Monica: Wow! Thats great! Dad must really like you, he doesnt ask just anyone to play.
Ross: Or you can sit with him on the front porch and make sure no one steals the trash cans. He does that every week too.
Phoebe: (pauses as he figures out how to answer that) Because Im normal! That was the one legacy my grandmother left me, and I know you wanted it as an engagement present.
Rachel: That is the Coast Guard.
Joey: Come on Rach, not again. I got it! Okay? Lets start sailing, and I want to go over there (Points) where that boatload of girls is! (Yelling to them) Yo-ho-ho!
Rachel: Oh, okay. Is that what you want to do? You wanna go over and give a little shout out to the old, hot chickas? Okay, lets do that Sailor Joe. Quick question though, (grabs some of the rigging) whats this called?
Monica: You dont? (Laughs) Well, thats the difference between a professional and a layman.
Phoebe: That and arrogance.
Phoebe: I cant believe that! Now the only thing left of my grandmothers legacy is this crumb. (She picks it up with her finger and holds it out to Monica.) I wish you a long and happy marriage.
Chandler: Daddy. All right look, heres the story. (Flashback to Chandler about to enter the steam room as he does the voice-over.) Well, we had just finished playing racquetball and we were gonna take a steam. I walk into the steam room and it was really steamy. (The flashback shows his glasses fog up and him trying to find his way around the steam filled room. He takes off his glasses.) So I take off my glasses and thats when in happened.
Chandler: Why? Okay? Why? Wh-wh-why did that have to happen?
Phoebe: Come on, its not that big a deal!
Chandler: Not that big a deal? There there was touching of things.
Ross: Now, I know you wanted to bond with my dad, but did you really have to bond to that part?
Monica: Listen, Im sure that dad doesnt care. He probably thought this was funny; hell be telling this story for years!
Chandler: If that is your father calling to tell this story then the marriage is off!
Chandler: Look, I figured I would try to convince him not to tell the story anymore, and I figure the best way to do that is face to faceAnd by face I dont mean his lap. And by face, I dont mean my ass. (Exits.)
Rachel: Look Joey, Im sorry if-if you thought that was mean, but I gotta tell ya something. That was not mean. Okay, my father is mean. He used to yell at me all the time on the boat, I mean it was horrible. I was just being a good teacher.
Joey: Six and a half! You knocked that last one out of my hand! Remember?
Joey: Well it hit me anyway! And it wouldve hurt a lot less if I had finished that last beer.
Phoebe: Oh, what was that for? Like a bake sale?
Ross: Which one was that?
Rachel: Its left sweetie, but thats okay sweetie, thats a tough one.
Joey: (hurrying over) Okay! Okay, youre yelling again! See that?
Rachel: Okay Joey, were luffing a little bit, so could you tighten up the cunningham? (The mainsail has started to flap in the wind and has stopped working efficiently; she wants him to tighten it so that it starts working again.)
Joey: Oh, yknow, when we did that was when that bird was flying overhead with the fish in his mouth. Did you see it? It was gross!
Rachel: (angrily) No! All right?! I did not see the bird! I did not see the fish! I did not see the piece of Styrofoam that was shaped like Mike Tyson! I did not, because I was trying to teach you how to sail a boat! Which obviously is an impossible thing to do!
Joey: All right thats it! Youre yelling and I dont see you taking your top off! I quit!
Phoebe: Yknow, I bet it would actually make my grandmother very happy to know that were trying to figure out her recipe. I bet shes l-l-lookin up at us and smiling right now.
Monica: Well, Ive tried everything. I give up. I guess Im not gonna be the mom who makes the worlds best chocolate cookies. I do make the best duck confit with broccoli rabe. Kids love that right.
Ross: Aww, Pheeb, come on isnt there any relative that would have the recipe? What about, what about your sister?
Phoebe: Oh no-no, no, I made a promise to myself that the next time I would talk to Ursula would be over my dead body. And thats not happening til October 15th, 2032.
Ross: Thats the day youre gonna die? Seedarnit, Ive got shuffleboard that day.
Phoebe: Thats what you think.
Monica: I cannot believe that I just spent the last two days trying to figure out the recipe and it was in my cupboard the whole time!
Joey: Yeah, yeah. Hey, why dont you give a pull on that rope? (Points.)
Rachel: Oh wow! (She takes a bite, but holds the sandwich vertically so that the stuff falls out.)
Joey: What youdont hold it like that! Youre lettin all the good stuff fall out.
Chandler: Hes not supposed to ask my girlfriend to marry him! Im supposed to do that!
Joey: Well, you're way sounds a lot better than mine. (Thinks about it.) Yeah. Yeah! It's not that I'm a bad actor
Hums While He Pees: Me too! Im sorry that guy in the subway licked your neck.
Monica: Yeah, is that okay?
Ross: I could, yeah, I can do that.
Joey: (approvingly) Oh! ok, yeah, I think I can do that. Yeah ok, there's this party scene coming up.. and Olivia and her husband are there and all Drake wants to do is grab her and kiss her, but he can't... And that makes me think about all those times when I wanted to grab you and kiss you, but you didn't know so I would just pretend everything was cool, but really, it was killing me.
Phoebe: You guys make a very attractive couple. (The camera cuts to a shot of the picture and we see that Monica is posing with Joey instead of Chandler.)
Wendy: Oh. - What's *that* like?
Ross: Thats right, I love you! And-and Im gonna play with you all the time.
Chandler: But we don't do that.
Phoebe: Hey, dont call him that! His name is Spackel Back Harry!
Monica: Eh, we weren't that close anyway!
Stripper: So is that a bedroom? (Points to the guestroom.)
Ross: Thats Daddy?! But doesnt it bother you? Youre a waitress.
Monica: Eh, you work for that.
Chandler: Yes! And look, now that I know if I got some extra stuff lying around can we, can we share the closet.
Rachel: And also, you know I uh, I was thinking about what you said, you know, about the whole sex thing and... it's probably not a great idea to go down that road again.
Monica: You thought about that?
Waiter: It�s just that we do have some large parties waiting.
[Scene, A Restaurant, Rachel is on her date, drunk, and is leaving that answering machine message.]
Phoebe: Aren't we done with that?
(Shortly after that, Chandler enters.)
Chandler: Yes! And thats why Im under the table. Celebrating.
Chandler: (singing) The sunll come out tomorrow! Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow (The girls start laughing, and in a deep voice) therell be sun.
Chandler: Now that Rachel's gone?
Ross: Yeah. The bartender said that they split up into two search parties, the herbivores and the carnivores. (pause) You know, we as a group are not the coolest.
Phoebe: (interrupting) Uh-huh, me too. Ross, maybe I should've specified that I'd be needing a grown up doctor.
Chandler: (yelling from the changing room) All right! I found one that fits!
Tag: (interrupting) Uh Mr. Zelner, Im the one who filled in that evaluation.
Janice: I will go for that drink.
Ross: (grabbing back his coffee) If the place you are referring too is being in love, then she is in the same place as me because I am not in that place!
Joey: Yeah, I called the lady about that. I told her I was just joking. She was pretty nice about that.
Rachel: (sitting down next to Chandler) Im training to be better at a job that I hate, my life officially sucks.
Chandler: Picturing that tree?
Ross: Soon hell be able to call you, that lady he knew who got fired.
Monica: Right there! That was so fake!
Joey: Ok, wait wait wait wait a minute wait a minute, I mean Rach, I mean if if... . If Hugsy means that much to Emma then... well she can have him.
Rachel: I dont care! All right, yknow what Im just upset that Im getting nowhere with Joshua thatyknow what still, you do not meet someone and go flitting off to Vermont!
Phoebe: Pay the caterer! Look, I've had a lot of jobs, okay, and there are some people who just always try to get out of paying. It's either, you know, "that massage wasn't long enough, or, "I don't recognize any of those songs," or, you know, "these sombreros aren't big enough. Bad little white girl!"
Gavin: Yes, I feel that you are a little annoying.
Ross: well.. its just. its just in that case, then um. Emma would go to my parents.
Rachel: Okay, but if it only happened that one time, how come we found your underwear in our apartment the other day?
Phoebe: I dont know, I hardly ever say that about people.
Rachel: Ok, I know this is gonna sound really stupid, but I feel that if I can do this, you know, if I can actually do my own laundry, there isn't anything I can't do.
Monica: Hey-hey-hey. You wanna hear something that sucks.
Monica: Because I know that you think the lottery is "boohaki" but we're all here and gonna watch the numbers and have fun. And you're my brother, and I want you to be a part of this.
Joey: (Voice cracking) Well thats like summer in a bowl.
Monica: All right, you just make sure that Chandler catches the ball, Ill take care of the rest.
Ross: No, its Its not that. Umm, now what Im going to say to you, Im not saying as your friend. Okay? Im-Im saying as it as Monicas older brother.
Monica: You ordered a stripper for the shower?! That is totally inappropriate!
Phoebe: That wouldn't stand in the way of a true pianist.
(The waitress lets her in as Monica is about to throw a lobster into a pot of boiling water (Although, she hasnt taken off the rubber bands that hold the claws, so she cant be that good of a chef). Anyway, guess who the Colonel is by the following phrase.)
Ross: Oh, yeah, yeah that�s Michelle.
Rachel: Do you have anything that would... get us out of them?
JOEY: Hey, hey, I just figure Joseph's the kinda guy that likes to mix it up. Ya know, get in there, ruffle some feathers.
Rachel: Wow. She does that a lot!
Rachel: How do you know about that?
Michelle: You feel that too? Oh, I thought that was just me!
Rachel: Come on see, she doesnt look that bad.
Rachel: Whoa, how do you know about that?
Joey: Nice!! Yeah! Is that part of your resolution, your new thing for today?
Chandler: Oh, so thats why the priest threw holy water on me. (theres no reaction from Joey) Okay, listen, you have to cheer up! Okay? You should come out with Ross and me, I mean anything is better than sitting around here crying all day about Kate.
Joey: Or... just get a card that has a poem already in it.
Monica: Sure, we'll do that. What are you up to?
Joey: She was all crying. She-she said you guys want different things, and that and that she needed time to think.
Joey: Look, Ross, really its-its no big deal. Yknow you wear a white coat, I wear a blue blazer, if that means we cant be friends at work, then so be it. Yknow, hey I understand. Yknow? Hey, when Im in a play and youre in the audience, I dont talk to you, right? So its yknow, its uh, its cool. Ill see you tomorrow. (Leaves)
Phoebe: How do you even know a woman like that?
Joey: Yeah, you know, it's not that fun.
Chandler: I don't do that.
Ross: Thatll be a neat trick, when youre, (looks at the script) when youre dead!
Rachel: Really? What's that like?
Chandler: Ooh, she's asleep, that means we can...
Rachel: Hey Mon, lets give Pete a chance Come on, he was funny, he seems really nice, and that check thing was adorable.
Waiter #2: What are you doing? Are you trying to get him to stay? Because you can't do that.
Monica: Well, that was weird. You were loud, and I was fast.
Phoebe: Yeah That does sound great. I'm going to get the phone. (They both get up.)
Ross: That bad?
Ross: Why does everyone keep saying that?
Ross: Female body inspector? What size is that?
Phoebe: No. They said you 'Weren't believable as a human being.' So, you can work on that.
Rachel: Well, youve been here for two months now and your boss is required to hand in a performance evaluation. But yknow, there is one thing that I have yet to evaluate. (She turns around and sweeps the stuff off of her desk and hops up onto it.)
PHOEBE: Listen. You are not going to believe this but, that is not me singing on the video.
Monica: Oh my God! Oh, this is incredible! Ohh! (she rolls over and kisses him on the cheek) All right, y'know what? Im just gonna roll right into that office and-and quit!
Phoebe: I haven't exactly had a normal life and I never really felt I was missing out on anything but it just feels that now it's my turn some of the regular stuff.
Rachel: I know, that old lady at the end was ready to take you home.
Judge: Now it also says here that you lied about your sexual preference before marriage?
Rachel: No, so I dont have to get married until Im 33! Thats three years, thats three whole yearsOh, wait a minute though. Ill need a year and a half to plan the wedding, and Id like to know the guy for a year, year and a half before we get engaged Which means I need to meet the guy by the time Im thirty.
RACHEL: Ok, we can do this now, can't we Ben? Yes we can, yes we can. [finishes the diaper] There. I did it. I did it. Look at that, oh, stays on and everything. Hi.
Monica: Is that a bit you guys do?
Monica: We don't do that! Tell her we don't do that!
Chandler: But you did like us. And you should. My wife's an incredible woman. She's loving and devoted and caring. And don't tell her I said this but the woman's always right... I love my wife more than anything in this world. And I... It kills me that I can't give her a baby... I really want a kid. And when that day finally comes, I'll learn how to be a good dad. But my wife... she's already there. She's a mother... without a baby... Please?
Rachel: I made the mistake of telling him that I was pregnant.
Monica: Well, if you really think about it, I mean four days is not that long. I mean, I see you Monday before you go to work, and I see you Thursday when you get back, and I always work late on Tuesdays, so really if you think about it, it's really just one day. And well, if we can't make it one day, we've got real problems my friend.
Joey: Dude, youre not even man enough to order the channel that carries the sport.
Chandler: And that would have made the official party line. (Joey nods) Monica and I are having a little financial trouble.
[Scene: Cole-Geddes Casting Agency, Joey is there on his audition and thinking about that 2,000 bucks for the twins study.]
Monica: ...And then we throw your body in the water... Gee, that does sound fun.
Ross: Like em, like em? Or, Id like to get store credit for that amount like em?
Phoebe: Yeah I get that.
CHANDLER: Well, doesn't the fact that I wore the bracelet even though I hated it say something about our friendship and how much it means to me?