words in movies
Charlie: (while Joey's giving her a massage) Oh! That feels sooo good!
Joey: Are you kidding? Rachel loves to shop! And she has great taste! Yeah, she's the one who taught me, you don't wear white after labour day and that you always, always, always have to put on underwear when you're trying on clothes.
Phoebe: Oh... Mike's sister just invited me to a party tonight, he's gonna be there. And she was like "Oh, don't worry! I asked him. He's totally ok with seeing you!". So now I have to go so he'll think that I'm totally ok with seeing him!
Phoebe: (after a short pause) I didn't even think about that! (pause) Aaargh, sexual politics!!
Joey: Oh, ain't that nice? The three of you trying on slutty lingerie together.
Joey: Why would you ruin it, who was that hurtin'?
Doctor Connelly: And, of course, if you feel that neither of those is right for you, you can always adopt.
Chandler: Is that a hint? Because we love you Doctor Connelly but we don't think we'd want you to be our child! (Dr. Connelly glares at him) Wow, talking about an inhospitable environment!
Chandler: I think I can safely say that we all have family issues, work stuff and/or are sick.
Chandler: Well... there's surrogacy, but Monica has dreamt her whole life of carrying a child, she has felt that watching a surrogate would be... too hard for her.
Joey: So, I don't have to learn what that means?
Ross: (reading from a notepad) I mean, we've been accepting Leakey's dates as a given, but if they're off by even a hundred thousand years or so then you can - you can just throw most of our assumptions, you know, right in the trash. (he throws the notepad in the waste bin) So-so what I am saying is - is is that (he picks the notepad back from the waste bin) is that the repercussions could be huge! I mean, not just in palaeontology, but if-if you think about it, in evolutionary biology, uh, genetics, geology, uh, I mean, truly the mind boggles!
(Turns to look at Professor Sherman, only to discover that he is sleeping)
Phoebe: Oh, I'll take some of that.
Rachel: You know that depends on what it is! I've done a lot of stuff.
Phoebe: Uh, wow! Isn't it ironic that he liked you and now you like him?
Phoebe: Oh well, as long as it is under control, you know, you can't do anything about it, he's already dating her, and she is a nice person, that wouldn't be right.
(Monica hears that and is suddenly very interested in Zack)
Phoebe: Well, maybe she didn't hear! Ok I'm gonna go into that dressing room, you stay in here and I'll talk and see if you can hear me.
Rachel: Oh, thank God I can't hear a word that you're saying!
Rachel: Ok well, I heard that! Which means that she heard it too!
Joey: Fine, I'll rent a car and drive...! Ross, you have to get that job!
Ross: I can't! If he realizes that I'm the one that put him to sleep, I won't get the job!
Chandler: So what do you think? I want that guys genes for my kid! Those eyes, those cheeckbones!
Monica: I think he is fine! It's just that we don't know anything real about him... we should get more information.
Chandler: I noticed you were enjoying that Ravioli with a beautiful set of teeth. Did you have braces as a child?
Charlie: It's just that... I don't understand it... I mean, Phoebe likes Joey and then she comes here to buy a dress to impress another guy...?
Joey: Alright, then you go to that party and you pretend to be over Mike. And afterward you come to my place and I'll get you good and drunk!
Phoebe: You got it! Ok. But not on the wine that you made, ok, because I just don't want to go back to the Emergency Room.
David: Well, after eight years of research I discovered that it can't be done.
Phoebe: Well, it's great that you're back! How are you?
David: She's also a scientist, so she's very smart and pretty and... well, it's actually because of you, really, that we're together, I mean, I saw what you had with that Mike guy, and I just said "Boy, I want that".
David: You're kidding me. Because I'm not seeing anybody, I've just totally made that up.
David: Yeah, I know. Well... this is probably a stupid question, seeing that you look like that, but do you have some place that you need to be right now?
Charlie: Hey, there's Phoebe! Is that Mike she's with?
Chandler: Are you just tired now or are you always tired, 'cause that could be a sign of clinical depression.
Chandler: Why not, just because his great-grandmother was obese, our kids are gonna get that from you anyway!
Monica: No, that's not it. It's just that when we were asking him all those questions before, I just... I just realized I don't care if he's the most perfect guy in the world... he's not you.
Chandler: (sighs with relief) Thank God, because I don't wanna do this either. You know, I was just doing because I thought that was what you wanted to do. You know, I'm the husband, I'm supposed to... bring the sperm.
Monica: That is so sweet. I love you. (they kiss)
Chandler: How do you feel about that?
Chandler: Me too. I wanna find a baby that needs a home and I wanna raise it with you. And I wanna mess it up in our own specific way.
Phoebe: Oh, you like that? You should hear my phone number.
Joeys Date: Sorry about that, but I couldnt get that lock to work on the door.
Phoebe: (shocked) Oh, well, it's a shame that you-that you miss the movie 'cause we were gonna see, you know, either "Liar, Liar" or "Betrayal", or... "An Affair To Remember".
Monica: Wait a minute. That wasnt a hard eight! Last night I rolled a hard eight.
Phoebe: Oh! Well, what kind of emergency that gets us both out of here?
Rachel: I always loved that!!
Chandler: Ahh, you know what? That is....Who wouldnt want you?
Ross: Thats not really porn.
Ross: I'd lead with that.
Joey: (To Chandler) Hey man, you feeling any better? (Chandler answers him with some guttural sounds that only he can make and that no human can transcribe.)
Phoebe: And no, oh please, oh please let me finish. (Rachel stops talking.) Oh I guess that was it.
Ross: Cassie, how you-how you doin on that hot dog.
Monica:: I cannot tell you how happy that makes me! (They hug)
Joey: Ross, you should know that my pants are startin to come down and Im not wearing any underwear!
Rachel: Because Im married. Thats right, I am a married woman! And I came to a TV stars apartment to have an affair! Uck!
Rachel: No, you're right, you are absolutely right. I mean that makes, that makes everything different.
[Scene: That same plane cabin, Ross is working on a crossword puzzle and Rachel is asleep against his shoulder. She shifts a little bit and Ross suddenly gets an idea. An evil idea when he looks at his pen. Then we have a little time lapse, the plane has landed and everyone is disembarking. The flight attendant is saying bye-bye to everyone.]
Rachel: Yes, so close. Mrs. Lynch, I know that this is an emotional and difficult time, for all of us. But by any chance did Joanna send any paperwork your way before it happened.
Ross: Thats true, thanks dad. (To All) People should be dancing! Huh? Hey, this is a party! Come on! Joey, dance!! (He starts to dance but stops when no one else joins him.)
Chandler: Me, that guy who just said butt cracks?
Steve: Chandler, hi! I'm sure you've heard we filled the three positions. We just felt that with your maturity and experience, you wouldn't be happy being someone's assistant.
Chandler: You are aware that shes not a monkey, right?
Rachel: Oh, oh thanks. Alright well, now that I'm up I'm going to go to the bathroom.
[Scene: The Airport, Chandler and Monica are following the previous couple through a tiny hallway that proves this is a set on a sound stage and not an actual airport, and see them enter the first class lounge.]
Chandler: Well no, Charlie's gonna get that.
Chandler: Oh, I'm so glad we cleared that up. Look, I'm sorry, some things are different for men and for women.
Ross: Wow. What does that mean?
Rachel: Yeah and honey I promise next time that I will just say good-bye and tell em youre not looking for a relationship.
Rachel: Joey, I gotta tell ya, I've been thinking all day about that scene you did, I mean, you were amazing!
Phoebe: Uhu, uhu... and why do you think that is?
[Scene: The Hall Outside Lydia's Room, Joey is walking up to Lydia's room with balloons, but before he enters he sees that the baby's father has arrived. He listens at the door.]
Joey: I'm telling you, that monkey is a chick magnet! She's going to take one look at his furry, cute little face and it'll seal the deal.
Monica: Oh... what does that mean?
Monica: Okay, looks like Ross and I are captains. Okay, so um, I bunnied first so that means I get to pick first. Joey.
Ross: I prefer not to answer that right now, Im still carrying a little holiday weight.
Phoebe: But that woman can't know I work here. She's a friend of mine and I made this big stink about how awful this massage chains are.
Janice: No-no-no, no. I'm going to talk. I believe that the sun has set on our day in the sun.
Chandler: And err, he informed me that uh, she took the news rather badly, in fact, he uh, mentioned the word frenzy.
Rachel: Umm, well I would have to say that it's a, it's tragic love story.
[Scene: Ben and Joey's (Isn't that an ice cream??) callback.]
Rachel: Hey! We were not on aOkay. Thats fine! Fine. Yknow what Ben? One day when you are a lot older I am going to tell you that entire story over a pitcher of real margaritas, okay?
Phoebe: Oh, thank God, 'cause that thing's really creepy! (looking outside the window) Look, there's Chandler. (he's on the street, talking to a woman)
Rachel: Gee, I always heard them talk about that, I just always thought that it was a club they went to. Oh God, Im, Im sorry. (walks away)
Rachel: Oh, isn't that adorable? Joey is afraid of the tarantula.
Phoebe: How can people do that?... (All but Phoebe walk away from the window in disgust.) Oh, you guys, look! Ugly Naked Guy got gravity boots!
Monica: All right, hand me that other box of photos; that's the very last one.
Rachel: (To Phoebe) In case you didnt notice, that is a scary man.
Rachel: What do you mean, you fold? Hey, come on! What is this? I thought that 'once the cards were dealt, I'm not a nice guy.' I mean, what, were you just full of it?
Joey: That... never happens...
Phoebe: Noo! But that would've been so cool!
Joey: Well, I guess he says that because they were on a break when it happened, that she should of forgiven him by now.
Joey: (Smiling) I can't believe you guys went for that one!
Joey: Hey man, look sorry about that Archie thing. Do uh, do you need me to give you some money?
Chandler: It's just that we bought a hibachi together, and then he ran off and got married, and things got pretty ugly.
Monica: I think the things that you said about me are really unfair, and I would like for you to give my bouillabaisse another chance.
Rachel: Whoa! I cant believe you did that. That was really sweet.
MONICA: If you really want to watch that Serengetti thing, you can.
Chandler: That would be advice!!
Phoebe: OK, fine, if it means that much to you I'll get rid of Bob.
Ross: Wait a minute, are you doing that thing where you pretend it didnt go well but it really did go well?
Conan: But audiencesYou have a live studio audience and they must love that. They must love it when they see you guys playing.
Emily: No. Thats not what Im saying. I just may know a few things that might help you inflict some pain.
Ross: Wha... what you really think we can do that?
Chandler: Yeah, so, what's that supposed to mean?!
MONICA: There's no man in here.� How dare you accuse me of that.� (She slaps Chandler.)
Chandler: Well, thats the part where you tell him that I moved to France. When actually Ill be in Cuba.
Chandler: And there's not chance that will work?
Chandler: Big picture please! So I was in the gift shop, and thats when I uh, saw this. (He holds up a little, tiny baby jumper that reads I (heart) New York.) Yeah, yknow what? I thought anything that can fit into this, cant be scary.
Rachel: Zelner! Right! I knew that! I really, really want this job and I think, I think I would be really good at it.
Charlie: I didn't do that.
Rachel: Okay, y'know what uh, actually, that's great. That helps a lot. Thanks. (She leaves them to wrestle.)
Chandler: Well she, she wouldnt do that, shes with, shes with me.
Chandler: What a minute, I know that hat! I was taken aboard that hat! They did experiments on me! I cant have children!!
[Scene: The fire escape, Joey is now hanging off of the bottom rung of the ladder that wont move and Ross is watching from above.]
JADE: Hey, Bob, it's Jade. Listen, I just wanted to tell you that I was really hurt when you didn't show up the other day, and just so you know, I ended up meeting a guy.
Ross: Yes! Thats where we realized we were both super cool people!
Ross: Wow. Umm Huh I'm-I'm not sure what to do with that right now.
Ross: Youre not getting away this time mister! Unless you want that ass kicking we talked about!
Monica: I'm not always that bad!
Rachel: I don't care about any of that!!
Chandler: You're damn right I'm right. I say you show this guy what you're made of. I say you stand your ground. I say you show him that you are the baddest hombre west of the lingerie.
Rachel: Oh well, you dont want to do that now?!
Joey: (coming in from his bedroom) What is that?
Phoebe: Me taking care of you is no problem, huh? You guys feel safe. Right? Okay, Im gonna take that spit bubble as, "Yeah, I do!" Okay, after I get rid of this dirty diaper Leslie, Ill set you up with a clean one. (She throws it at the garbage without looking, misses, and knocks over a vase and flowers, which fall to the floor and break.) Okay, Im sorry. I didnt mean to scare you. I just have to clean that up. Okay? Cause lets face it, were at Monicas. (She crawls over, disposes of the diaper, picks up the flowers, and the vase.) I broke it. All right. Well, thats just the way that goes. (She throws out both the flowers and the vase.) Okay, good. (She turns around and only counts two babies.) Why are there only two of you? Where is Leslie? Well, you cant answer. (She starts looking for her) Leslie? Where are you Leslie? Leslie, now would be a good time for your first words! (She turns around and finds that Leslie has managed to crawl into the bottom drawer of the TV cabinet.) Well, look at you! Hey! You are a little bit mischievous! My gosh! (She picks her up and notices a surprise is waiting in the drawer.) Oh, youre a lot mischievous! Well, itll dry. (Closes the drawer with her foot.) (To Leslie) Okay, you sit with your brother and sister nowwho arent there! (They both have disappeared as well.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, later that morning. The porn is still on, there are three women getting ready to shave the chest of some guy. Joey and Chandler are wondering why that guy is letting them shave his chest, and Monica and Rachel are eating breakfast at the foosball table.]
Rachel: No! No! No! No its not! No its not! Come on! Phoebe, ours is totally different! I mean we dont have the (Looks desperately for something different.) We dont have the that lamp! And-and that screen is yknow, on the other side.
Monica: Ohh, I've always wanted to go to this culinary fair that they have in Jersey!
Chandler: Shes moving on! Okay, if its not this guy, its gonna be somebody else! And unless youre thinking about subletting my peep hole, you are going to have to get used to the fact that the relationship is over! Okay, man? Its over.
Ross: Posting that I died? That really isn't funny.
Monica: Yeah. Hey, that was nice of you guys to back off and let Joey get the girl for once.
Rachel: But that wasn't gonna stop you before!
Rachel: Yeah, I said what was okay when I thought she was some weird bald chick. I mean, y'know, that girl has hair got all over head!
RYAN: [Comes out of the bathroom, also with oven mits on his hands.] Well that wasn't easy.
Monica: Ohh, sweetie! (Goes to comfort her.) Hey, I bet you anything that hes gonna call you again.
Chandler: Dont take this personally okay? Its just that I just cant have sex with a sick person.
Mike: You know, you should really look in a mirror before you call yourself that.
Ross: And what(notices the stenographer is still typing)What are you typing that for? Did you hear what she said? We dont get the annulment. Dont type that! What?! Stop typing! (He goes over to where the stenographer is typing and in the process pushes Rachel out of his way.) Hey! Stop typing! (Hes still typing.) Stop typing! Stop typing!!
Ross: I knew that was him!
Joey: (thinking) All right. Its a new day. All that stuff about Rachel, you dont feel that now. It was crazy! Youre fine. Youre better than fine! You are, as your friend Tony would say, Grrrreat! Everythings normal! Shes just your friend Rachel! Your friend Rachel. Your friend! Rachel.
Phoebe: Oh no-no, no, I made a promise to myself that the next time I would talk to Ursula would be over my dead body. And thats not happening til October 15th, 2032.