words in movies
Joey: Well that thing is clearing in the way! All right. Ah-ha! (He grabs a screwdriver and starts to attack the compressor, only he causes a small short circuit and shocks himself.) Ah-ah!! Damn fridge!
Joey: Yeah! Well, now that you brought it up, our fridge is broken. We have to get a new one. Now, I checked around and your half is $400. Thanks a lot.
Rachel: Im not paying for half of that! Im only staying here until my apartment gets fixed.
Joey: Look Rach, my parents bought this fridge just after I was born, okay? Now, I have never had a problem with it. Then you show up and it breaks! What does that tell ya?
Rachel: That refrigerators dont live as long as people.
Joey: All right, now you know that the ATM will only lets you take out 300 at a time, Ill take a check for the other hundred.
Rachel: Well, someone that has his own tux, or has the ability to rent a tux.
Elizabeth: Oops! I did not mean to run into you like that sir.
Ross: Oh that is quite all right maam. (Elizabeth exits.)
Chandler: Oh, tell her good luck with that.
Monica: Well that is great. And seriously, she seems very nice.
Ross: Thanks. I know you guys like to give me a hard time and all, but it really means a lot to me that you like her. Just knowing that you guys are
Chandler: Oh thats so funny because we found someone too.
Phoebe: Oh thats good, I guess shell have a choice between my guy and your weirdo.
Phoebe: Cause thats just your taste.
Phoebe: Oh yeah, like there are police for that!
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Chandler is entering to find Joey bingeing on the food from the fridge. Joey isnt doing all that well.]
Joey: The fridge broke. I have to eat everything. Cold cuts, ice cream, limesHey, what was in that brown jar?
Chandler: Thats still in there?!
Ross: Hmm? (Turns around and sees that its Elizabeth) Oh, a student I dont know.
Ross: You dont understand! Elizabeth was about to ask me to go on a trip with her! Is that taking it slow?! No, Im not ready for this! Okay? What-what do I tell her?
Ross: I can do that. Oh-oh, what if she gets upset?
Joey: Oh-ho-ho, you think I dont know what breaks my fridge? Excuse me! (He opens the door and feels inside.) Well what do you know! Broken! Thatll be $400!
Ross: Joey, I did not break this! Okay? (He opens the freezer and smells inside and recoils in disgust.) That has been broken for a while.
Elizabeth: Ross, I think you misunderstood what I was saying. I just wanted to tell you that Im going to Florida for a couple weeks.
Ross: That! Lets talk about that.
Ross: Huh? Oh-oh, it was fine. Uh, it was just a misunderstanding. She didnt want me to go with her. She just wanted to let me know that shes going to Florida for spring vacation.
Ross: Hey, yknow what? Not all spring breaks are like that.
Chandler: I can see it now, "Look dad, its the Sphinx!" (Does that party noise again.)
Rachel: We just uh, we just met at the newsstand. We both grabbed for the last Field & Stream. (Chandlers shocked.) What? I read that.
Rachel: Well, yknow what though you guys? I really appreciate that but I think Im just gonna take Sebastian to the charity.
Monica: Uh, would you stop it with that already?!
Phoebe: No reason, its just I know a single guy that cares about other people.
Chandler: Yeah, but Sebastian? What is that? A cats name?
Phoebe: Yeah, yknow what I noticed Rachel? He scares easy. Is that the kind of guy youd like to take to a ball? "Hey Sebastian, would you like to dance?" (Imitates him.) "Uhh, okayI gotta go!"
Monica: All right guys stop it. Rachel, were very sorry that is a very insensitive thing for us to do. And yknow what? Let us make it up to you, we have two really great guys for you.
Ross: Well, it turns out that she is going to Daytona for spring break woo-hoo. That means, that means wet T-shirt contests, guys doing shots off of girls bodies, waking up next to people you dont even know
Elizabeth: Is that supportive?
Chandler: Tomorrow night is good. Tomorrow night is good, but uh, yknow what? Why put off something till tomorrow that you can do right now? (Laughs) Eldad come here! (He stands up from the next table.)
Phoebe: Oh! Okay! Yeah, thats okay. (To Patrick) Have a seat. (Sits Patrick down next to Rachel.)
Monica: No! You cant do that!
Monica: Thats right Patrick, bye-bye!
Rachel: I Am I the only one that this is embarrassing for?
Rachel: I am still talking!! And then you chase away the one guy that I actually liked! I mean, no offense to you guys. Really! I mean (To Patrick) congratulations on all the cash, (He nods) and-and yknow(Feels Eldads hair)Wow! You do have very soft hair! But I would much rather go to the ball all by myself than go through anymore of this! Good-bye! (Grabs her stuff, starts to leave, then turns back suddenly, and to Eldad) Now do you use some sort of special conditioner on that hair?!
Ross: Yeah. And did you, did you pack that bathing suit?
Ross: It was pretty funny when I, when I hid it for a while, huh? Anyway, umm, I-I am worried about that bathing suit, not because its revealing which Im fine with, no Im concerned about your health, sun exposure.
Rachel: Oh thats all right! Yknow, I ended up having a really good time. Yknow, the charity was a big success and they raised a lot of money and awareness.
Phoebe: Oh my God, look! Thats Elizabeth!
Joey: Yeah-yeah, I noticed that! Is that cause shes so passionate?
Rachel: Monica look! Look-look-look! Here is that table that I ordered. (Shows her the picture.)
Chandler: Yes, and his father invented that magnetic strip on the back of credit cards.
Joey: It made you feel good, so that makes it selfish. Look, there's no unselfish good deeds, sorry.
Joey: Thats great, but isnt it gonna bother that people still think youre a porn star?
Rachel: Huh. Except, Phoebes not gonna be the one that gets to dress them.
JOEY: [in a fake voice] Uhh, hello Miss Buffay. I know where your dog is. I want you to know that he'll be returned to you, almost as good as new, within, within 24 hours. Uh, goodbye. [hangs up]
Ross: Look I-I dont know whats going on with you and your husband and what is hopefully an adult dog walker, look can I just say not all men are like that.
Joey: Wow! Thats pretty nice. I thought he cut off his ear cause he sucked. What else you got in there?
Ross: Yeah, I really do. Yeah, but what am I gonna do, I mean we-we both agreed that it was gonna be a two-week thing, yknow no commitment.
Chandler: Well, it certainly worked for that Valdez kid.
Cliff: Is this the same spoon that was in my cast? (Smells it.)
David: Uh, that's definitely a, uh, valid question. And, uh, the answer would be (Writes YES on the board) yes. Yes I was. But, see, I wanted it to be this phenomenal kiss that happened at this phenomenal moment, because, well, 'cause it's you.
Rachel: No, Ive just always wanted to do that. Can you help me clean this up?
Female Jeweler: I just sold it to that gentleman. (Points to the one walking out the store.)
Rachel: Well, maybe thats, maybe thats really brave.
Mrs. Geller: Oh, well Richard raved about the food at his party, of course you were sleeping with him. Then I heard the food at that lesbian wedding was very nice, I assume you werent sleeping with anybody there. Though, at least that would be something. (Leaves)
Joey: Yeah, you can get a Volvo. If thats what you really want.
Joey: Im sorry Dutch, I didnt get that last little bit.
Chandler: (to him) Hi! Hi. Okay, there was a slight mix-up at the jewelry store, the ring youre about to propose with was supposed to be held for me. So, Im gonna need to have that back. (The guy isnt sure.) But, in exchange Im willing to trade you this beautiful, more expensive ring. (Looking at the ring.) Ew.
Phoebe: Okay, look you wanna hold onto your food? You gotta scare people off. I learned that living on the street.
PHOEBE: OK Rach, which, which lily? This lily or that lily?
Rachel: Yeah. So Frank, three babies. Whew, that just seems like a lot, huh?
Monica: Hey. Okay, so umm, since that video camera thing didn't work out uh, I thought that I would give you just a little preview. (Hands him a Polaroid.)
Phoebe: Ooh! I know what you could make! (runs over to join Monica and Rachel in the kitchen) I know! Oh, you should definitely make that thing... you know, with the stuff? (Monica doesn't know.) You know, that thing... with the stuff...? OK, I don't know. (sits down)
Monica: Well Thats not the only time this was an issue. You remember when umm, you spent Thanksgiving with us? You called me fat.
PHOEBE: Ok, look, before you even start, I'm not denying evolution, ok, I'm just saying that it's one of the possibilities.
Ross: Yeah, pants, what, what an idea. Or better yet, um, how 'bout you go without any pants. Look, I don't know what you're trying to do to me, but just get your butt in there and pick out any shoes that fit your feet, okay. No, no I don't care if they match. I don't care if they make your ankles or your knees or your earlobes look fat. Okay.
Joey: (manages to pry off only a small piece) Aw! Look at that, every inch of this stuff is glued down. Itd take forever to pry this up. You should ah, you should just leave it. (starts to walk away, but Monica grabs him)
Ross: Rach, I promise first thing tomorrow we'll find another doctor, but I gotta get up early and I'm not feeling all that well.
Monica: I think he is fine! It's just that we don't know anything real about him... we should get more information.
Monica: Thats Will from high school!
Ross: Oh, well you see how it works is, the part with Dick Clark in Times Square is actually live, but they tape some of the party stuff ahead of time. Yeah, not a lot of people know that.
Chandler: Are you just tired now or are you always tired, 'cause that could be a sign of clinical depression.
Ross: What kind of job is that for a man? A nanny? I-It's like if a woman wanted to be...
Rachel: Umm that kiss before we left the apartment. That was some-something huh?
Rachel: Yeah, I have to tell Ross that I love him. Now honey, you take care, you dont have those babies until I get back. (Kisses her stomach.)
Earl: Its just that I uh, have been working for ten years now at this meaningless, dead-end job and nobody here even knows I exist!
Phoebe: Well, I think it's great that the medical community is finally trying to help sick hamsters.
Ross: Oh, well he's obviously late and the rule in my class is "if you can't come on time, then don't come at all". (pause) An option that many of my students use. (pause) Shall we?
Phoebe: Well, hey, what if Kenny were the real brains behind the whole company? You know. What if Kenny hired that Ralph Lauren guy to be the pretty front man? Huh, did she ever think of that?
Mrs. Geller: Oh, Martha Ludwin's daughter is gonna call you. (Tastes a snack) Mmm! What's that curry taste?
Vince: No-no its okay. Its just that ah, I thought we had something pretty special here. And y'know I-I felt like you were someone I could finally open up to, and (starts choking up) That theres so much in me I have to share with you yet.
Richard: Well, apparently Im willing to offer her things that you are not.
[Scene: A grocery store that Janice shops in. Chandler is on purpose, accidentally bumping into her.]
Rachel: Ross, I am telling you that she is using you to get back at me!
Ross: Unagi is a state of total awareness. Okay? Only by achieving true unagi can you be prepared for any danger that may befall you!
Monica: Yes. Uh, yes, I did. That was my friend, Eddie Moskowitz. Yeah, he likes it. Reaffirms his faith.
Chandler: Yeah, well, sorry doesnt bring back the little piggy that cried all the way home! I hate this stupid day! And everything about it! I'll see you later.
I made a man with eyes of coal And a smile so bewitchin', How was I supposed to know That my mom was dead in the kitchen? (shakes bell) La lalala la la la la lalala la la...
Krista: Here, I'll get it. (She grabs a napkin and tries to wipe it up. The thing that gets the rest of the gang going is that she's whipping awfully close to his crotch. In fact, she is whipping his crotch. Chandler's about to come out of his chair.)
Phoebe: Yes there are! There are totally good deeds that are selfless.
Monica: What the hell is that dog doing here?! (She notices the dog sitting in the living room.)
Chandler: Did I teach her that? Did I just... impart wisdom?
Phoebe Sr: Oh, thats okay, it gave me time to finish glazing my nipples.
Monica: You know, Rachel, when you ran out of your wedding, I was there for you. I put a roof over your head, and if that means nothing to you... (Rachel isn't buying it, desperate) twenty dollars an hour.
Ross: Ooh, we'll say that we were mugged! You can't get mad at someone who's been mugged!
Chandler: If I took this promotion, it'd be like admitting that this is what I actually do.
Rachel: Well forget it, Im not telling that girl anything. That is not my responsibility.
Phoebe: Which proves that I never lie.
Joey: Pheebs! Wait up! (She stops.) Listen uh, close your eyes. (She does so and Joey passionately kisses her.) Maybe thats one thing you can cross off your list.
Chandler: (after they've left) Okay, did you see that?! With the inappropriate and the pinching!!
Joey: You should see the treatment I get when Im with that car! People are friendly; they-they wanna talk, and not just about the car! One guy gave me advice about my equity investments.
Joey: Yknow what? I think thats enough for today. Thanks for your help! (He grabs their scripts and heads for his room.)
Rachel: Yes! That I know, this is from White Plains.
Ross: All right, fine! Fine! Have me fired! But uh, I want you to know that you and I are not all that different. I mean, I too am a neat guy. (Paul just looks at him.)
Phoebe: Are you kidding. He is so considerate of my feelings and... you know I think... you'd also like to know that he is a very gentle lover.
Rachel: Wh-whats that?
Monica: So that marriage stuff that you were saying yesterday, you dont really believe that do you?
Rachel: Yeah, there was. It wasthere the corner of the library where-where all these dusty books that nobody ever readYes, there was.
Chandler: (embarrassed) I cannot believe Ross told you that! (pause) And in my defense, it was a Wendy's!
Joey: Im gonna go down there and teach that guy a lesson.
Monica: Okay, how about the fact that he's engaged to another woman, who just happens to be your ex-best friend?
Chandler: Look, for the first time in my life I'm in a real relationship. Okay, I'm not gonna screw that up by y'know, telling the truth.
Phoebe: Why, I must have been in missile training the day they taught that.
Ross: (skeptical) That doesn't sound like you... That's Monica talking!
Monica: Wait. Rachel, no, hes married. Married! If you dont realize that, I cant help you.
Joey: Thats okay Ross maybe you need a new picture. Okay? Its not gonna be what you thought, but no matter what theres gonna be a brand new little baby, your baby. Who cares what the picture looks like?
Mike: Yeah, I'm serious. (sarcastic) It's fun, it's different and no-one else has a name like that!
Chandler, Phoebe, and Joey: No, I wasnt gonna ask you that, no.
PHOEBE: Well I have a video, you have to pay attention. No this, this voice woman, she's so talented but, according to the producer people, they said she doesn't have like the right look or something, ya know. I mean, it's like, she's like one of those an imals at the pound who like nobody wants 'cause they're not pretty enough or you know. Like, like some old dog who's just kind of like stinky and. Huuuuh, oh my God, she's smelly cat. Oh, oh that song has so many levels.
Chandler: Very, very funny, but don't say things like that in front of Monica. I don't want you putting any ideas in her head.
Ross: (pauses) I'm pretty sure that it is...
(Ross is so moved by his father's charming story, that he stops eating.)
Joey: Oh, I'd love too, but I got acting class. But y'know what? I guess I can blow that off, (In a sexy voice) for you.
Rachel: (breaking up) Were just really very excited about this charity event that we have to go to.
Joey: Hey! Let me ask you guys something. I have a new headshot taken tomorrow right and the photographer said she thinks Ishould have my eyebrows waxed. Is that weird for a guy?
Phoebe: (muffled through the floor) Yeah, look I was with my friend downstairs and we hear everything up here that you do, and I am sick and tired... (I tired but the rest is unintelligible).
Joey: I will be okay! Look Chandler, you gotta get it out of your head that I cant take care of myself. Okay? Look, Im not gonna miss you helping me out with money. The only thing that Im gonna miss is you. And now the dog.
Chandler: Allright, fine, but don't blame me if it doesn't work. Because you know as well as I do that once Joey sets his mind on something, more often than not, he's going to have sex with it.
Rachel: Okay fine! Ill-Ill just tell her its an antique apothecary table, she doesnt have to know where it came from. Oh! Look at this little drawers! Oh look-look it says that it holds 300 CDs.
Rachel: Monica, would you calm down? The credit card people said that you only have to pay for the stuff that you bought.
Ross: Yeah-yeah, except Apollo 8 didnt actually land on the moon. But you-you-you could write that umm, your love lets me orbit the moon twice and return safely. (Apollo 8 was the first one that orbited the moon and the one that read the Christmas Story from the orbit of the moon on Christmas Eve, 1968. They also took the famous Earthrise picture of the Earth rising over the moon.)
[Cut to Central Perk, to the theme from The Dick Van Dyke show Joey runs into Central Perk carrying a stack of Soap Opera Digests and falls on the step. He does bounce right back up making it all that much funnier.]
Phoebe: And that horrible museum tour!
Joey: (shocked) From the land down under? I didn't know that either!
Fireman No. 3: It's all right. It's all right. You don't have to explain. This isn't the first boyfriend bonfire that we've seen get out of control.
Monica: Because I don't have the money or the equipment to handle something that big on such short notice. I mean there's no way.
Phoebe: Personal shopping? What is that? Like where you walk around with snooty rich people and tell them what to buy?
Phoebe: Thats right, there you go! Crushes happen all the time! I know Ive had them for all you guys. Well, except for Ross and Chandler. And Im sure youve had them for us.