words in movies
Chandler: Oh, hey, when she gets here, is it ok if I introduce you two as "my wife" and "the woman who's carrying my child"? (she's not amused) No? Divorce?
Ross: So unbelievable. She was supposed to meet me half an hour ago with Emma. (he tries to take a cookie but Monica slaps his hand)
Monica: Well, because we want to get to know her better and she's never been to New York so she wants to see all the tourists' spots... you know, Statue of Liberty, Empire State Building...
Rachel: Ohh... (Ross mouths HA-HA at Monica and takes two cookies and she looks at him angrily)
Phoebe: I, I have to go before I put your head through a wall. (she leaves)
Rachel: Ok. (She sits on the bed and Ross sits near her) Thank you for coming with me today.
Ross: Ok, well, uh, I can maybe grab a sleeping bag, or...(There's one of those moments. They're staring at each other, no word uttered, and then she leans toward him in order to kiss him, but he ducks and avoids her more than once.) Oh, oh. (he then hugs her and when she tries to kiss him again, he stands up and she falls down on the bed). No, Rach! I'm sorry, I just don't think this, this, this is a good idea.
Phoebe: Well, you're not, (she tries to smile and contain her anger, but loses it) You're not... you're not... again, you're not SPEAKING FRENCH!
Rachel: (She turns around very slowly, looks at him for a second and then turns back to her coffee) Sure. (She gives him the cup she was pouring for herself without looking at him)
Rachel: In the future, when a girl asks for some ill-advised sympathy sex... just do it. (she smiles fakely at him)
Rachel: (sarcastic) Oh, that is so hot. She walks around him to the other side)
Rachel: Oh, really, really? Well, it wasn't very good for me either. (She turns to leave and Ross over takes her and stands infront on her, his back to the row of doors leading to the hospital rooms)
Chandler: O-okay. (steps closer to Monica and speaks softly) So, is she gonna take the test?
Monica: Nope, she doesn't have to, I found out who the father is.
Erica: Well, it turns out that Erica didn't pay much attention in Sex Ed class, because the thing she did with that prison guy... it'd be pretty hard to make a baby that way.
[Scene: The theatre where Joey is auditioning. Phoebe enters when Joey's on stage and she sits down. He hasn't seen her.]
Rachel: Just so you know... With us... it's never off the table. (she enters her room and closes the door.)
Phoebe: It's off the resumé. (she strikes it through with a pencil)
All: Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut... (She cuts one of them and they cheer.)
Phoebe: Okay. (She starts folding the napkins in half.)
Phoebe: See, this is exactly what we do not have time for. (She rushes into her room)
Phoebe: Yeah okay... yeah, your mom... okay... She looks nice, I can talk to her.
Chandler: Yes, yes I did, but what I didn't say was what I was about to say, what I wanted to say was, uh... would you like to go out with me sometime, thankyou, goodnight. (He walks back to the others but she calls him back.)
Monica: Oh, that is so sweet. (Touched, she puts an arm around her friend and kisses her.) Oh gosh, love you. Insurance?
Phoebe: No, yeah, we never find them! Shes always best at us that wily minx.
Paul: No, unfortunately Lizzies mom passed away shortly after she was born. I raised her by myself.
Monica: We’re waiting for the adoption lady, but, hey, I’m glad you’re here. I was cleaning this morning and I found this (she puts a box on the table and opens it). I don’t know if you wanna use it, but…
RUSS: Oh, all she said was that I remind her too much of somebody. You have any idea who she's talking about?
Phoebe: Oh down please. (The guy tries to reach the button, but cant.) I-I hate to be a ball buster can I just do it? (She pushes the button.)
CHAN: It's alright. Is she good-looking?
ROSS: Dad, she won't want to go with me.
Joey: No. No. No. She lives on the third floor, eighth apartment from the left.
[In the bathroom Susie and Chandler are kissing. She backs into a stall.]
[Scene: A street, Phoebe walks up to a homeless person (Lizzie) she knows.]
(Phoebe gets up and walks across the hallway, but the door to Chandler and Joeys apartment is shut. She knocks, and anxiously waits for Joey to come, but instead her identical twin sister emerges wearing one of Joeys shirts.)
Phoebe: It’s ok, it’s ok. I made my decision. What I really want is a great big wedding (she covers her mouth)
JOEY: She laughed at you?
Ross: Thats not true! Her, she doesnt even know what she wants! Rachels still mad about the whole thing.
Monica: Oh. (she laughs)
Phoebe: Ow! My ass. Okay. Okay. (She manages to climb completely inside and the window slams shut.) Oh, shhh!
Phoebe: Oh! It will be fun! Ohh! Yay! Oh! Okay, ooh, lets plan the wedding reception. (She grabs the notebook which Monica used for her ideas and starts flipping page after page after page after page after page to find a blank one.) Wow! You really wanted me to do something with this van. (pause) Yknow what, I want you to take the chef job.
(The waitress lets her in as Monica is about to throw a lobster into a pot of boiling water (Although, she hasnt taken off the rubber bands that hold the claws, so she cant be that good of a chef). Anyway, guess who the Colonel is by the following phrase.)
Charlie: I guess. There was hum... (she breathes deeply) there was another reason that I thought it was time to end it with Joey. I started to realize that I was having feelings for someone (pause) else.
Rachel: Oh, yeah, sure, it's umm... (she picks up this bug and it starts to play the theme from Love Story)
Monica: Here. Ben, do you wanna play the airplane game, do you wanna show Rachel? Come here. (takes Ben) Were gonna do something fun. Okay. (throws Ben up in the air a little bit and catches him) Weee!! (moves into the living room and does it again) Weee!! (starts to walk back into the kitchen as she does it again, and hits Bens head on that wooden beam across the ceiling.)
JOEY: Well she better get here soon, the outlet stores close at 7.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is playing "She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not" with the petals of a flower, alternately looking hopeful and annoyed. Phoebe enters, but not as herself, for she has changed the style of her hair and make-up to match that of her twin sister. She hangs up her coat, revealing her new cardigan. Nervously, she smooths out the identifying garment, approaching Joey who sits next to the main sofa.]
Monica: And when I told her that I was gonna be moving in with Chandler, she was really supportive. (To Rachel) (Starts to cry) You were so great. You made it so easy. And now you have to leave. And I have to live with a boy!! (They both break down in tears.)
Chandler: It is going to be perfect. I am taking her to her favorite restaurant. Im going to get her a bottle of the champagne that she really loves; therefore knows how expensive it is. Then when the glasses are full, instead of proposing a toast Im just gonna propose.
FRIEND: Yeah, is she really 20.
Rachel: Come on Ross! You said you wanted to talk about it, lets talk about it!! How was she?
Phoebe: Me taking care of you is no problem, huh? You guys feel safe. Right? Okay, Im gonna take that spit bubble as, "Yeah, I do!" Okay, after I get rid of this dirty diaper Leslie, Ill set you up with a clean one. (She throws it at the garbage without looking, misses, and knocks over a vase and flowers, which fall to the floor and break.) Okay, Im sorry. I didnt mean to scare you. I just have to clean that up. Okay? Cause lets face it, were at Monicas. (She crawls over, disposes of the diaper, picks up the flowers, and the vase.) I broke it. All right. Well, thats just the way that goes. (She throws out both the flowers and the vase.) Okay, good. (She turns around and only counts two babies.) Why are there only two of you? Where is Leslie? Well, you cant answer. (She starts looking for her) Leslie? Where are you Leslie? Leslie, now would be a good time for your first words! (She turns around and finds that Leslie has managed to crawl into the bottom drawer of the TV cabinet.) Well, look at you! Hey! You are a little bit mischievous! My gosh! (She picks her up and notices a surprise is waiting in the drawer.) Oh, youre a lot mischievous! Well, itll dry. (Closes the drawer with her foot.) (To Leslie) Okay, you sit with your brother and sister nowwho arent there! (They both have disappeared as well.)
Rachel: Oh Ross, you're so great. [she playfully rubs his head and gets up]
JOEY: Hey I- [she cuts him off with a kiss]
Monica: (she tastes what she has cooked) I don't get older. I just get better!
Chandler: If you said, "Big lima bean, bubbling up." Would she understand the difference?
Rachel: (entering) Hey! Everybody hide! Hide! I saw her! Shes coming!
Joey: Great Great and thanks for being so understanding. I mean, I didnt want to make a big deal out of this, you know. (She starts to collect all the girlie stuff up.) You could, uh, put the picture of the famous baby in my room. I mean, if you want to.
Rachel: Oh my God! How long has she been crying?
Phoebe: OkayOop! Too late! Im leaving! Come on Chandler lets go! (She storms out.)
ESTL: Well, here it is. [She almost smiles.]
[Scene: Mike's parents building. Phoebe gets out of the classy elevator, looking all dressed up like an older woman, and very un-Phoebe. She walks to the door and rings the doorbell.]
Pete: Well, if that were true, Id dating my Aunt Ruth. And the two times we went out were just plain awkward. (to Rachel) Come on, you think she should go out with me, dont you?
Monica: (entering quickly) Shes a hooker! Shes a hooker! Shes a (Stops as she sees her.) Hi! Uh, we spoke on the phone. (Goes and shakes the hookers hand.)
PHOEBE: I told you not to do that yet. And, she wants to do a video.
Joey: (Yelling from Rachel's room) She has a lot of crap!
Ross: So, uh, this guy, she used to go out with, is, uh is he still in love with her?
Monica: Well, if I had them taken out, then I wouldn't be able to do this. (she pushes Chandler on the couch and brushes her hair and shells against Chandler's chest) You like that, right? (again, she brushes her hair against his chest and hums...)
Ross: Well, actually its been great. Shes 20 so shes not looking for anything too serious, which is perfect for me right now.
Monica: I swear I didnt know she was a hooker! I mean whDid you let her smoke in here?
Joey: Would she? (He smells something and gasps as he realizes what it is.) You ate my candy bar!
Joey: Oh my God, is she going back to him?
Chandler: Okay, Ms. McKenna, she kind of works above my boss, she asked me to move to Tulsa and be the president of our office there, and I was sleeping and apparently, said yes.
Rachel: Give it here. (She takes the table.) Oh, God. (And gives it to Monica right away.)
[She starts the cab and pulls forward. We hear a squish and a dog yelp.]
Chandler: I dont know! What could she possibly be hiding in here that I cant see?!
Luisa: Step aside, ladies! (She loads a gun)
Kate: Oh, yeah. I love Jennifer Van Murrays work. Shes so brilliantly incisive when it comes to deconstructing the psyche of the American middle class.
Rachel: Oh God, oh, and then she told the funniest story...
Chandler: Ooh-hoo. Very hot, very sexy. But ah, y'know shes too international, y'know shes never gonna be around.
Phoebe: I have liver damage. Ow! Oh! (She grabs the left side of her torso.)
Phoebe: Okay, she would love that! Y'know, 'cause you know all the clean places to eat.
Ross: I'm telling you, she said she's looking for a relationship with someone exactly like me.
Chandler: ...Couldn't enjoy a cup of noodles after that. I mean, is that ridiculous? Can you believe she actually thought that?
Rachel: Whoa!! Whoa, whoa, wait a minute. What time did your little friend leave? (Ross cant answer that) Oh my God. She was there? She was still there? She was in there, when I was in there?!
"We thought Phoebe would leave, but she just stayed and stayed. Thats right, Im here all night, and Chandler will never get l "
(Ross hands Rachel back the newspaper, and she starts beating him with it again.)
Ross: No Joey! Look why dont, why dont we just let her decide? Okay? Hey-hey, well each go out with her one more time. And-and well see who she likes best.
Rachel: Oooh... ***I really can't hear what she says*** come here.
Ross: Listen. Oh hey, hey, the important thing was that she meant, she meant nothing to me!
(She throws the paper at him, misses and hits Monicas door, they all jump back at the sound.)
Rachel: (startled) Ahh, hi! Hi! Melissa, whats up? Im just uh, about to umm, go out to the store to get some stuff to put in my backpack. Yknow, like dried fruit and granola and stuff. Whats up? (She has put on the backpack.)
Chandler: Well, what? What? What is it? That she left you? That she likes women? That she left you for another woman that likes women?
Rachel: And yet she was worth jeopardising our relationship!!
Ross: Yeah, I think she looks good.
Ross: No!! Okay?! Why does everyone keep fixating on that? She didn't know, how should I know?
Monica: (to Phoebe) Oh my God! Did you hear that? She hired me because she thinks Im good.
[Scene: Carol's Room, she is ready to give birth. Everyone is there except for Phoebe, Ross, and Susan, who are in the broom closet.]
Joey: (to Chandler) And I ah, borrowed some of your cologne. I hope she likes it.
Joey: Okay, time to take off the bra. (She glares at him.)
Rachel: I can not believe he would do that to MonWhoa! (She stops suddenly and slowly turns to point at Joey. Joey is avoiding her eyes.) Joey, do they know that we know?
Monica: Boy, I love carrots! Oh! (She picks up a bunch of them and holds them between her fingers.) Sometimes I like to put them between my fingers like this and-and hold them down here while I talk to you. (She is rubbing her hip with the carrots.) Umm, and-and-and y'know if I get really hot umm, I-I like to pick up this knife (She picks up a knife without putting the box down. She's holding the box between her cheek and shoulder) and-and umm, I-I put the cold steal against umm, (Pause) my body. (She doesn't have any exposed skin within reach of the knife, so while holding the carrots in one hand and the box between her face and shoulder, she rubs the knife on her stomach.)
The Casting Director: Terrific! Well uh, theres one more thing. Uhh, uh its really important to the director that everything in this movie is authentic. Yeah and so in your love scene with Sarah she talks about how shes never seen a naked man who wasnt Jewish. So (Laughs.)
Rachel: Oh you're not. You're not gonna get in the middle of anything, don't worry about Ross really, really.(She hears the noise of the key in the lock) Oh! Hide! That's Ross! Hide! Hide!
Rachel: (on tape) (Ross hands her a glass of wine) I cannot believe that I did this. Especially after Monica just went on and on and on about it! (Mimicking Monica) "Okay Rachel! Here are the invitations Rachel! Now be very careful Rachel! Please, drinking no liquids around the invitations Rachel!" (She tilts her wine glass above and moves it back and forth across the invitations) Whoa oh! Oh-oh-oh! Oh oh-oh-oh
Ross: Hi Rachel! Here's your sister Amy! She thinks I need pec implants!
Chandler: I'm sorry, I thought you were Joey's other grandmother. (She just stares at him.) I've done it again.
PHOEBE: Aren't you gonna answer her, that's like the tenth bing-bong message she sent. She wants to know what's wrong?
CHANDLER: There was no fish when she dropped it off.
MR. GREENE: ...what the hell does she want with half a boat...
Ross: (clutching a beer can and sniffing) This was Carol's favorite beer. She always drank it out of the can, I should have known.
Monica: Oh THATS ME! (she runs to the pizza guy)
Joey: Because it's impossible to find her apartment! She lives in some like of hot girl parallel universe, or something.
Nancy: She is kidding, but don't ever disagree with her again. Okay, now I'm kidding!
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment. She and David are still kissing each other in the living room.]
Joey: (concerned) Oh. Whats, whats going on? Is it mom? Is she sick? Is it dads heart? Is that a sandwich?
Joey: Yeah, but for a one-year-old. What's the point... the other day she laughed for like an hour at a cup. Just a cup with a picture of Elmo on it dressed as a farmer. And he's standing next to this cow and the cow says "El-moo"! (Joey starts laughing) Yeah... that's a funny cup!
(Joey walks in and sees Ross and Charlie kissing. He gives a faint, rueful smile, then he seems to recollect something and suddenly he moves back to Rachel's room. He knocks on her door and she opens)