words in movies
Ross: Y'know if we ever go to war and youre captured, youre in for a big surprise.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Monica are sitting on the couch playing cards, and Phoebe is working on a new song.]
Ross: Oh, you could just go uh, "greatest of ease (plays air guitar) BAH-bah-bha-bhannn." Then go right into it.
Ross: Well umm, yknow, I used to play.
Ross: Yeah, just a little in high school, but then I really got into it in college. I mean thats-thats when I really found my sound.
(Monica is taking a drink as Ross says that, laughs, and snorts her drink.)
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Really? No. I mean, nah, I havent played in so long, and-and, well its-its really personal stuff, yknow?
Ross: No, you guys, I mean my keyboards are all the way up inNo, yeah, okay. (Runs out.)
[Cut to later that same day, Ross has retrieved his keyboard and is about to debut, "The Sound."]
Ross: Okay, guys.
Ross: Here we go. (Plays one note) Yknow, Ive-Ive never played my stuff for anyone before, so its important that-that you understand its about communicating very private emotions. (Plays another note) Yknow, umm, you should-you should think of umm, my work as wordless sound poems. Thats what Im
(Ross starts to play. He plays a key that has a back beat sound attached to it. Over the background music he plays the sound of a barking dog, a mooing cow, a laser beam, someone coughing, a jackhammer, a doorbell, a police siren, a ray gun, breaking dishes, and for a closer he plays the sound of a loud crash. Basically, the music sucks.)
Ross: Really?! I mean, really?!!
Ross: Wow! Thanks, you guys. Thats uhohhh, I wanna, I wanna play you another piece! Umm! Uh-oh! I left my uh, helicopter sounds on another disk. Ill be right back! Okay? (Runs to fetch them) This is so nice, ImI am so (starts to break up and leaves)
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is performing, his music hasnt improved.]
Ross: (His voice is altered to sound like a computer.) Electrifying. (He plays the sound of a ticking clock.) Emphatic time-time-time
[cut back to Ross who finally finishes his so-called song with the same crash from before. He gets some applause, mainly cause hes done.]
Ross: (with the altered voice) Thank you guys-guys-guys
Phoebe: I cant follow Ross! Itd be like those bicycle ridding chimps that followed The Beetles. No.
Monica: Phoebe, Ross sucks!
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross has just finished playing.]
Ross: (to Phoebe) Hey!
Ross: Oh, thanks, thanks. So Monica tells me that uh, you dont want to play anymore because me and y'know my talent. Is that true?
Ross: Pheebs
Ross: See but, Pheebs that-that is the exact opposite intent of my music. Yknow my music is-is meant to inspire, and if it bothers you this much, then I I wont play anymore.
Ross: Yeah, okay.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel and Monica are sitting on the couch and Phoebe is getting coffee as Chandler enters. Ross is also there.]
Ross: Hey Chandler! Saw the new furniture. Very nice.
Ross: What?
Ross: No the-the sad thing is, if you had told him how you felt before you kissed her, knowing Joey, he probably just wouldve just stepped aside.
Ross: Well, I said-I said something to Phoebe.
Ross: Hey, would it be okay if I wrote a song about this.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is playing his music. Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are sitting on the couch.]
(Ross finally finishes with the same crash, and gets some applause.)
Ross: Thank you, thanks. (Sits down next to the girls) Yeah, I lost it. Yknow, Im not gonna play anymore, (to Phoebe) would you, can you finish my set?
(Phoebe gets up and goes to play, Ross goes over and sits down next to Monica and Rachel.)
Ross: Yeah, like I could lose it.
Ross: I played bad on purpose guys.
Ross: Yeahno, just that last song.
Ross: (following them into the kitchen) What are you guys doing?
Ross: Hi. Sorry we're late but we werewell, there was touching.
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is getting Mona some coffee.]
Ross: Hello to the rest.
Ross: (enters) Hi, honey.
Ross: (Looking at the posters.) Wow, cool poster. Or should I say groovy poster? (They sit down on the couch. Ross smiles and the black light fluoresces his teeth.) So, ahh, where were we?
Ross: How's the hair?
Ross: Long story, honey.
Ross: What difference does that make?!
Monica: Ross let me ask you a question. All jokes aside, where is this relationship going?
Ross: Hey! (congratulates him)
(Ross and Chandler turn at the voice...)
Ross: Carol, we've been through this before, ok? We have a good time. We laugh, we play. It's like we're father and son.
Ross: No!
Ross: (overhearing) What kind of research?
Ross: It's breast milk.
Ross: Oh, I'm threatened by you?
Carol and Susan: Hey! (This wakes Chandler and Ross up)
Ross: Oh, you've tasted it.
Ross: Helen Geller? I don't think so.
Monica: Ross, he's got the remote again.
(They both laugh as Ross heads back to the bathroom.)
(Ross goes over to the counter. Chandler follows him.)
Ross: Oh, all right. (Joey flips the coin.) Tails! (The coin bounces off of the landing above them and falls to the ground.) Can you-can you see what it is?
Ross: No. No, I didnt. I didnt want to be that guy.
Ross: Yeah I know; hes in Bens class.
Rachel: (she reaches for the bottle) Oww! (She grabs the bottle, but has trouble opening it. She pops the top off and aspirins fly all over the place as Ross enters.)
Ross: I got it! Hey, you get to sleep with her, I get the cramps.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is there as Jill enters to start her date with Ross.]
Ross: Well, yeah. I cant-I cant stay here all night, and if I go in there shes-shes gonna wanna... do stuff.
Ross: Rachel, Ive seen you naked a million times. I ate hot fudge off you naked. Remember, I-I sucked that mini-marshmallow out of your belly button?
[Scene: Ross's apartment. Ross is holding Ben.]
ROSS: We'll give you Janice.
ROSS: [smells Ben's butt] No no, you're fine, you're fine.
[Scene: Ross and Rachels, theyre returning from the party.]
Rachel: Ross is coming over. I think now would be a really good time to talk to him.
ROSS: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What, you don't, uh, you don't believe in evolution?
ROSS: You don't believe in evolution?
ROSS: Hi.
ROSS: Well, there you go.
ROSS: Oh you guys are not gonna believe what happened.
[Scene: Elizabeth Hornswoggle's apartment; Ross is there on his date with her. They are sitting on the couch watching a movie. Ross is obviously hot.]
ROSS: Ok, we were sitting over there playing on the floor and he grabs the table and he pulls himself up. He pulled himself up. Standing man. I'm sorry you guys missed it but I did tape it so it you guys want to see it.
Ross: Phoebe, there is no secret. Okay? I didnt propose.
Ross: I think you made it clear you cannot be trusted with the ball inside the house!
Rachel: Well IThats never gonna happen with Ross.
ROSS: You remember Janice, right?
Joey: Look, Rach, Rach! I've been with my share of women. In fact, I've been with like a lot of people's share of women. The point is, I've never felt about anyone the way Ross felt about you.
Ross: Well, uh, do you have a Santa-outfit left?
ROSS: What?
Ross: A big idiot. Just you have to realize is, this whole Mark thing is kinda hard for me.
Joey: Oh hey but, before you guys do that (To Rachel) I need to talk to you, and Ross, I need to talk to you.
Ross: Ahem... I want.... OK, I want to... feel your... hot, soft skin with my lips.
Ross: Yeah, you're right, thanks Pheebs, I'm gonna go find her.
Ross: Four hundred, huh? Well, that sounds do-able. (starts to get out his wallet) How much are the boxes?
Ross: What do you mean? Nothing happened! I had to get out of there.
Ross: Uh, no... no. I couldn't find him. I'm just gonna talk to him on the plane.
Ross: No, no, no. I'm not in the zone.
ROSS: I don't believe this. I miss, I miss the first time of everything. I missed, what, the first time he rolled over, the first time he crawled. What else did I miss? Has he spoken yet, is he driving, does he have a favorite liquour?
ROSS: You comin'?
(Ross and Susan lift Phoebe up into the vent.)
Ross: No. No, uh, Phoebs? You can'tyou can't do...
Ross: Well, I added the 'exactly like me' part... But she said she's looking for someone, and someone is gonna be there tonight.
Ross: Chandler, what kind of an idiot do you take me for? (As he picks up the fake Ben.)
Ross: All right. (Gets up.) I'll uh, I'll see you later, okay?
Janitor: (to Ross and Susan) Wait! You forgot your legs!
Rachel: Uh, yeah. Uh, Monica, y'know, honey, I've been thinking about it and I've decided thisthis whole Ross thing, it's just not a good idea.
ROSS: Whip it out, whip it out.
[Scene: Mrs. Verhoevens Apartment, Ross is back to inquire about the elder Verhoevens health or lack there of.]
ROSS: [to Chandler] So what's it shaped like?
Ross: J-j-just relax, nobody yelled. Jack just was calling to make sure that you were getting better.
[Scene: An aircraft cabin, Ross and Rachel are on their way to Vegas.]
Monica: Guys. I thought you were taking Ross to the game?
Phoebe: (entering with some guy) Hey. Ooh Ross! Howd the conversation go?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Rachel is balancing an aluminum can on her stomach as Ross enters.]
ROSS: Hey.
ROSS: Hey?
Ross: Anyone else? Huh? Bring em on!
Ross: Hi, did you order some bananas?
[Ross kicks her again]
[Scene: Ralph Lauren. Mr Zelner's office. Ross knocks on the door and enters.]
ROSS: What?
ROSS: Technically, huh, no.
ROSS: Sexy?
ROSS: No kidding?
ROSS: Really?
ROSS: What?
ROSS: You'd wait?
Ross: Nobody likes change.
ROSS: Women really want this?
Ross: Do you think if the Ralph Lauren people offered her her old job back, she would take it?
[Scene: Ross's apartment. Ross enters and checks his messages.]
Rachel: Ross Im so sorry. Okay. I-I will promise I will straighten this out with him tomorrow in person, or via e-mail.
Ross: You'd better hope not because I just read what you put on your page today.
ROSS: Hi everyone.
Ross: Thank you. (they shake hands) All right, here I go. Hey, remember how scary it used to be going up to girls in college?
ROSS: What's wrong with people having sex?
Monica: Umm, if ah, it might be okay if Ross came skiing?
ROSS: Pop it in.
ROSS: Oh look, did, did you just see that? Did you see? He just waved, he just waved, he's never waved before, you've never waved before. Yes he has. Very good.