words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is on the phone with her mother. Phoebe, Rachel, and Ross are there.]
Ross: And officiating at tonight's blackout, is Rabbi Tribbiani.
Ross: That's my sister.
Ross: Pheebs, what about you?
Rachel: Um... Ross?
Ross: Disneyland, 1989, 'It's a Small World After All.'
Ross: The ride broke down. So, Carol and I went behind a couple of those mechanical Dutch children... then they fixed the ride, and we were asked never to return to the Magic Kingdom.
Ross: Step back.
[Time lapse, Ross and Rachel are talking, Joey is on the couch, and Monica and Phoebe are out of the room.]
Ross: Well, it was the only thing to do there that didn't have a line.
Ross: Come on.
Ross: (sarcastically) And you didn't marry him because...?
Ross: Probably. But you know, I'll tell you something. Passion is way overrated.
Ross: It is. Eventually, it kind of... burns out. But hopefully, what you're left with is trust, and security, and... well, in the case of my ex-wife, lesbianism. So, you know, for all of those people who miss out on that passion... thing, there's all that other good stuff.
Ross: But, um... I don't think that's going to be you.
Ross: Uh-uh. See, I see.... big passion in your future.
Ross: Mmmm.
Ross: I do.
Rachel: Oh Ross, you're so great. (she playfully rubs his head and gets up)
(Ross gets up, pleased with himself.)
Ross: (innocently) What?
Ross: (acts surprised) What? (pause) Why not?
Ross: No, no, no. I'm not in the zone.
Joey: Ross, you're mayor of the zone.
Ross: I'm taking my time, alright? I'm laying the groundwork. Yeah. I mean, every day I get just a little bit closer to...
Joey: Priesthood! Look Ross, I'm telling you, she has no idea what you're thinking. If you don't ask her out soon you're going to end up stuck in the zone forever.
Ross: I will, I will. See, I'm waiting for the right moment. (Joey looks at him) What? What, now?
Ross: Shhhh!
Ross: We're shushing... because... we're trying to hear something. Listen. (everyone is silent) Don't you hear that?
Ross: See?
Ross: (to Joey) OK, here goes.
Ross: I'm going to do it.
Ross: You come out there, you're a dead man.
Ross: Thanks. (Joey hugs him) OK.
Joey: OK. (Ross goes out on the balcony to talk to Rachel)
Joey: OK, you've got to promise that you'll never, ever tell Ross that I told you.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's Balcony, Ross and Rachel are talking.]
Ross: OK, I have a question. Well, actually, it's not so much a question as.. more of a general wondering... ment.
Ross: OK. Here goes. For a while now, I've been wanting to, um....
Rachel: Ohhh!!!! (looking at something behind Ross)
Ross: Yes, yes, that's right...
Rachel: Oh, look at the little cat! (a small kitten is on the roof behind Ross)
Ross: What? (the cat jumps on his shoulders) Ow!
[Cut to inside. Monica, Joey and Phoebe are singing while outside, Ross and Rachel are trying to get the cat off of Ross' shoulder.]
Monica: (to Ross) This is just Bactine. It won't hurt.
(Ross flinches in pain.)
Ross: Why don't we just put 'poor little Tooty' out in the hall?
Ross: (nonchalantly) Yeah?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross, Monica, and Joey are playing Monopoly.]
Ross: (rolling) Lucky sixes....
Rachel: And Ross.
Ross: (jealous) So, um... where did Paolo come from?
Ross: No, I mean tonight, in the building. Suddenly. Into our lives.
Ross: That, that is funny... (to Joey).... and Rachel keeps touching him.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Paolo are at the window. Ross and Joey are watching disgustedly.]
Ross: (mocking Paolo) Blah blah blah, blah blah blah... blah blaaaaaah....
Ross: Wha-What did he say that was so funny?
Ross: That's... that's classic.
(Ross looks at Joey.)
[Cut to the other side of the apartment, Ross has gone over to straighten things out with Paolo.]
Ross: Paolo. Hi.
Paolo: Ross!
(Ross notices that Paolo is standing on a step, which makes him taller. Ross gets up on the same step so he can look down at Paolo.)
Ross: Listen. Um, listen. Something you should... know... um, Rachel and I... we're kind of a thing.
Ross: Thing, yes. Thing.
Ross: No, no, no. Technically the... sex is not... being had, but that's... see, that's not the point. See, um, the point is that... Rachel and I should be, er, together. You know, and if you get in the.... um...
Ross: No, no, that's not where I was going. Er, if you get in the... way, of us becoming a thing, then I would be, well, very sad.
Ross: Yeah! Se vice?
Ross: So you do know a little English.
Ross: Do you know the word crapweasel?
Ross: That's funny, because you know, you are a huge crapweasel!
Ross: Thank you.
Ross: Kinda... spooky without any lights.
Ross: OK, guys, guys? I have the definitive one. Mwwwooooo-hah-hah...
(The lights come back on, and Rachel and Paolo are making out. Ross clutches his chest.)
Ross: Oh.. oh... oh.
Joey: Hey Ross. This probably isn't the best time to bring it up, but you have to throw a party for Monica.
ROSS: [Rachel, laughing, puts a hand on the guy's shoulder] Look at that, look at that, see how she's pushing him away and he won't budge. Alright, I'm gonna do something. [walks up in the middle of their conversation] Excuse me, are you Rachel?
Phoebe: Oh, I tasted Ben's milk, and Ross freaked out.
Ross: Look, G. I. Joe's in, Barbi's out. And if you guys can't deal with it, that's your 'too bad.'
Ross: Yeah.
[Scene: A couch store, Ross is trying to decide on a new couch for his place. He has dragged Rachel along for the trip, and she's not too happy about it. Ross is sitting on it in different ways to see how it feels. He tries to just sit on it normally, and then he tries flopping on it. One thing about this couch, it's huge. It's like twice the size of a normal full size couch. Whoever designed this thing, needs help and fast.]
Ross: Excuse me?
Ross: Uh, everyone, this is Chandler! My roommate and lead singer of our band!
Ross: Oh, this is Monica.
Ross: Yeah? I can use that, trick hip, no cup, okay! Okay!
Ross: (opening the door.) Hey!
(Ross takes a twenty and slips it underneath the bill when Dr. Green isnt looking.)
Joey: (to Ross) So, er... how did it go with Celia?
Phoebe: IRachel, you cant go! Ross loves Emily!
Ross: Oh, mom. Mom. Chandler hates Thanksgiving and doesn't eat any Thanksgiving food.
Ross and Monica: Dad, dad. We got it!! We Got It!!!
Emily: (to Ross) Good luck, babe.
Ross: No, Chandler, you have to find the line between stealing and taking what the hotel owes you. For example: hair drier, no, no, no, but shampoo and conditioners, yes, yes, yes. (pause) Now, the salt shaker is off-limits, but the salt (he opens the salt shaker and pours the salt into his hand) I wish I'd thought this through.
Ross: whats up, Dad?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey is getting ready for a fishing trip and Phoebe is asking him about the fishing lures. Ross is playing with the rod, and Monica is pretty much just watching the on goings.]
Ross: So tell me something. What does the phrase 'no date pact' mean to you?
Ross: Yeah well, if ah, if thats the rule this weekend... (She gets up) No!
[Cut to Rosss apartment, he his playing the Bagpipes, badly. Hes worse than that whole keyboard thing a few years ago.]
Chandler: She did not have to tell me, I saw the play, and there was no heat. Back me up here, Ross!
Ross: Ah Joey, I don't think you get to pick the cities.
Ross: I actually had a topic in mind! Im, Im kinda going through a dry spell, sex wise.
Ross: Im gonna, Im gonna go to London and Im going to fight for her.
Rachel: Ross is on a date with my sister and they shut the drapes two and a-half-hours ago.
Ross: Oh, umm, I'm just getting rid of a couple of things.
Chandler: (coming out of his apartment and seeing Ross) What did you do?
Joey: Look, Ross, I feel really bad. I mean, you're going through all this stuff and I just acted like a jerk.
Ross: No, I tried that. She says it has a weird smell.
Rachel: Come on Ross! Im miserable here! Come on! You started this, now you finish it! Come on wuss, make love to me.
Ross: Im getting married, to..day!!
Ross: Chloe, Chloe hows it coming?!!
Ross: (Screaming) Im getting married today!! Whoo-hoo!!
Ross: So uh, Rach? Does it, does it feel weird around here now? Y'know since I've been away at college.
Ross: Y'see, that's where you're wrong. Why would I marry her if I thought on any level thatthat she was a lesbian?
Ross: Did you talk about the night of five times? Do you tell people about the night of five times?
Ross: Ohh, man! Chicago, is sooo lucky!
ROSS: Ok, Pheebs! How 'bout we'll each just pay for what we had. It's no big deal.
Ross: Well, that's cool. So did (She walks away from him and he shuts up.)
Ross: (Very Nervous)Really?
[Scene: The Rehearsal dinner hall. Ross is at the Walthams table discussing the bill.]
Ross: Yeah but Pottery Barn! Yknow what I think? Its just she-shes weird. Yknow its because shes a twin. Twins are weird.
Ross: Nothing, nothing. Everything's under control.
Ross: You know what, I think weve had all the bad luck were going to have. (He hugs her.)
Ross: No, please, please, um, its for a poor little girl who wants to go to Spacecamp more than anything in the world.
(Joey and Ross enter causing Chandler to quickly hide the brochure behind his back.)
Ross: Okay, fine, fine. You dont want to believe me? No, thats fine. (starts to leave)
Ross: Rach, y'know I can see you naked any time I want.
Ross: I Ross...
ROSS: Oh, oh that's right, I forgot about your ability to fuse metal.
Emily: Take thee Ross...
Minster: Take thee Ross...
[Scene: The street in front of Central Perk, Ross is walking up and sees two women that look like Phoebe and Rachel from behind.]
Ross: I Ross...
Ross: I, Ross
ROSS: Hans...Hans...Yo evil twin.
Ross: Yay!
Ross: Happy too.
Ross: Okay.
Ross: (laughs) That uh, that was pretty funny. Wasnt it?
Ross: It was soo not an accident. She saw I was about to tag her, so she threw her big fat grandma arm elbow right into my face. And just keep running.
Ross: Hi!
(Cut to Rachel and Ross.)
Ross: Look, Im sorry.
ROSS: Ross, uh and uh, I'd just like to say that it did take a lot of courage for Rachel to come here tonight. And, uh, for the record she did not run out on Barry because she had syphilis. (da-doom-chesh) (to drummer) What are you doing I'm serious. Uh, the reason she walked out on, on Barry is simply that she didn't love him, which incidentally worked out pretty well for me (looks for the da-doom-chesh, and doesn't get one) Cheers.
Ross: Oh, right!
Ross: Does that mean the same thing in England as it does in America?
Ross: (entering) Emily?!
Emily: (running in, with Ross) Oh. Oh my God. How can this be happening? What are we going to do?
Ross: I'm sorry, Rachel, this is Charlie Wealer, she's a collegue.
Ross: (disappointed) Thats cool.
Ross: Wait, well wh-wh-wh-where is she?
Emily: Ross umm, theres something that Ive got to tell you, theres-theres someone else.
Ross: (sarcastic) That would be a good way to get rid of all the PCP we have lying around.
Ross: Okay, so it wasnt uh, a traditional massage. But I did give him accu-pressure with a pair of chopsticks. And, and I gently exfoliated him with, with a mop.
ROSS: Yeah, yeah, just a tough day at work. A stegosaurus fell over and trapped a kid. Whoa, whoa, I know this jacket, this is, th--Fun Bobby's jacket! Where is he, what. He, he's here, isn't he?
Ross: Its okay if he bumps his head, kids bump their heads all the time, y'know, it was your first time babysitting, I figured you did the best you could.
ROSS: Excuse me, I'm seizing. Mr. Treeger, here's another 50, happy Hanukkah. Will uh, will this help with the knob getting?
Ross: Yeah. You see my-my sister makes these amazing turkey sandwiches. Her secret is, she puts a, an extra slice of gravy soaked bread in the middle; I call it the Moist Maker. Anyway, I-I put my sandwich in the fridge over here
Ross: I know, uh, the air, the-the trees... even though Nana's gone there's, there's something almost, uh- I dunno, almost life-aff- (Not looking where he is going he falls into an open grave)
Ross: Umm, I'm sorry Judy, I couldn't find that bowl that you and Jack were looking for.
Ross: (Into receiver) Hello? (listens) Oh no! What happened? (listens some more) Ok ok, where are you? (Grabs a pen and starts writing). Ok, I'll be right there. (Puts the phone down)
Ross: Rach! Rach!
Ross: Oh.
Ross: Not yet.
Ross: I get it! Well, thats that.
Ross: Pretty soon I guess.
Ross: What?
Ross: Oh, I dont, I dont, I dont know
Ross: I know, why not?
Ross: Right?
Ross: Same difference.
Joey: (after Ross is gone) What is he doing? What, Emily, thinks Ross's furniture has got Rachel coodies?
Ross: Okay!
Ross: Cool!
Ross: Yeah, well nah.
Ross: Yknowthanks! (They hug)
Ross: You tell them to wait!