words in movies
[Scene: Moondance Diner. Ross, Phoebe, Joey, and Chandler are sitting at the counter, Monica is working. Monica is wearing her costume, including big fake breasts.]
ROSS: Question. Why do we always have to have parties where you poach things?
ROSS: Question two. Why do we always have to have parties with committees?
ROSS: Yeah.
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler, Ross, Joey, Phoebe, and Monica are planning Rache's birthday party.]
ROSS: I talked to Rachel's sisters, neither of them can come.
ROSS: Hi honey, how did it go?
MONICA: Chandler could you at least send some women to my party? [buzzer goes off] Alright that's Ross.
ROSS: Thanks for being born.
ROSS: Oh, now you can exchange them if you want, ok.
[they kiss and Ross backs her into her apartment and turns on the lights]
ROSS: Really?
ROSS: All right.
ROSS: What?
[Ad break. Time lapse. Still at party at Chandler and Joey's. Rachel is talking to Chandler and Ross.]
ROSS: You know what, this is ridiculous, ok. This is your birthday, this is your party. I say we just put 'em all together and if they can't deal with it, who cares.
ROSS: That's who.
ROSS: Ok, do you have any ideas for any openers?
ROSS: Hi Dr. Greene. So, uh, how's everything in the uh, vascular surgery....game?
MR. GREENE: It's not a game Ross, a woman died on my table today.
ROSS: I'm sorry. See that's the good thing about my job. All the dinosaurs on my table are already dead.
ROSS: Oh, here, I, I'll get it for ya. Whad'ya want?
ROSS: Scotch. Alright, I'll be back in 10 seconds with your scotch on the rocks in a glass.
ROSS: Cool.
ROSS: I know.
MR. GREENE: Oh hello Ross, where have you been?
ROSS: Hi. Uh, I have been in the bathroom. Stay clear of the salmon mousse.
ROSS: Oh, mine too. Isn't that neat, scotch neat. Would you excuse me? [walks out in the hallway, Mr. Greene is walking out of Chandler and Joey's apartment] Hey, hey, where you uh, sneakin off to mister?
ROSS: No. no.
ROSS: No, um, see 'cause that, that is, that is the staging area. If you go in there, it'll ruin the whole illusion of the party. Yeah, I think you take your scotch back in there and I will get your cigarettes for you sir.
ROSS: All righty roo. [closes the door] What a great moment to say that for the first time. [goes to get the cigarettes and glasses]
MRS. GELLER: Ross, whose glasses are those?
ROSS: Mine.
ROSS: Um-hmm. [puts them on] I have a condition, apparently, that I require two different sets of focals.
ROSS: Neil Sedaka wears them.
ROSS: Ohh, big smoker. [Packs the cigarettes and flings one on Mrs. Greene in the process. Finally gets one in his mouth and it look really out of place] Big big smoker. In fact I'm gonna go ou into the hallway and fire up this bad boy. [as he walks into the hall, he comes face to face with Mr. Greene]
ROSS: Yes. [pulls them off and hands them to Mr. Greene] I was just warming up the earpieces for you.
ROSS: [pulls the cigarette off his upper lip and hands it to Mr. Greene] Yeah, yes it is, I was just moistening the tip.
CHANDLER: I, I know. [Hugs her. Ross walks out and Chandler puts her in his arms.]
[Mr. Greene opens the door to Chandler and Joeys apartment. Ross sees him and runs to the door forcing him back in then holds onto the door knob.]
MRS. GREENE: Ross, what're you doing.
ROSS: I'm getting ready for the water skiing. [Mr. Greene opens the door which pulls Ross in] How are you doing?
Ross: Well, for one thing, she keeps calling her Ella! Rachel: (Defends Amy) Wha.. well, Ella's a nice name!
(Ross finally looks at the woman kissing Mark.)
(Ross starts laughing)
Ross: Fine.
Ross: I know!
Ross: Ive said it! Okay?! But its over Joey!
Chandler: (Angrily) Alright, whoever this is, stop calling me! (Ross and Joey laugh silently.) Its been six months! Its not funny!
ROSS: Fine, OK! Heat, heat, heat, and I'm the obsessive one. [goes to the radiator and starts turning the knob] OK, this way is on, so this is. . . [breaks off the knob] off.
Ross: (normal voice) No, go on! It's Paul the Wine Guy!
[Monica picks up the bag, while Ross closes the door and hits Monica with his tail. They walk into the living room, and Monica empties the bag.]
[cut to later, Rosss team has the ball.]
Ross: Yeah. (closes the door, and goes over and kisses Rachel.)
Ross: Did you get like a fresh batch of pregnancy hormones today?!
Monica: Well, you guys have been friends forever. Remember the first time that you kissed Ross? How weird that was? You couldn't stop laughing? You got through that.
Ross: Mitzi is.....
Ross: Oh, yeah, why not?
Ross: Did homo-erectus hunt with wooden tools?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Monica are sitting on the couch playing cards, and Phoebe is working on a new song.]
Chandler: Okay, I went over to Ross' apartment to bring back Clunkers. Yknow, for you, and (Clears his throat) I left the door open and she must have gotten out and I looked everywhere, all over the apartment, including the roof, which FYI Ross, one of your neighbors, growing weed. I couldn't find him, and I am so, so, so, sorry. But I do know where we could all go ease the pain. (Points up and then over to the street)
Ross: You guys, you know what, you know what, it doesn't matter, because you both have to go get dressed before the big vain in my head pops. So..
Cailin: (to Ross) Hi! Remember me?
Ross: Its like that everywhere, Joey! Okay, Mon, back me up here. Where you work the uh, waiters eat with the waiters, right? And the chefs eat with the other chefs, right?
(Phoebe, Joey and Ross laughs again)
Rachel: I feel like were the only two people in the world. (She sets down her wine class, picks up a walnut, and knocks another one on the floor.) Oops. Sorry. (She reaches down to pick it up and Ross hands it to her. Ross is hiding under the couch and causes Rachel to scream.)
Ross: (to the rest of the gang) Were just gonna be friends.
Ross: (quickly talking) Hello, baby. Hello, hello.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Yeah, okay you're right.
[Cut to later in that episode. Ross is showing his boss his new place and notices something in the window.]
Cheryl: (sneaking up behind Ross) Guess who?
Phoebe: (Grabs the pictures) Oh! Here we all are! Yeah, there's Ross and Joey and you and me. (She picks up a magic marker and draws herself in. Monica can't watch.)
Ross: Fine by me; hope she wins.
Ross: That cup is mine!
Ross: Would you excuse us for a second? (Pulls Rachel off to the side) Umm . what are you doing?
[Scene: Outside Cheryl's apartment, Ross and Cheryl are kissing]
Ross: (loudly) Good luck!
(Ross reveals a bag of apples.)
Ross: Oh yeah, about telling Mom and Dad, I was thinking about maybe writing a letter.
ROSS: This is so cool. You're actually gonna be on television.
Ross: Whats up? (He smiles. His teeth are freakishly white.)
ROSS: Well then that's it. And if George and Adelaide can't accept that, then the hell with them. Look, if my parents didn't want me to marry you, no way that would have stopped me. Look, this is your wedding. Do it.
ROSS: And you had no idea they weren't getting along?
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Ross are giving Phoebe and Rachel the brides maid test.]
Ross: (to Monica): Could you take it to Carol's every now and then, and show it to Ben, just so he doesn't forget me?
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Well umm, yknow, I used to play.
Ross: Okay, guys.
Ross: Really?! I mean, really?!!
Ross: Pshhshhh!
Ross: Monicas right. Were talking about getting married here. Okay? She-she cant just rush into this.
Ross: All right, gentlemen, youre up first.
Rachel: Wh, Ross what do you want from me? You want me, you want me to quit my job so you can feel like you have a girlfriend?
Phoebe: (taking Ross aside) Have umm, have you thought anymore about you and Rachel?
Ross: Nothing. But the complaint department at the condom company got an earful. And then when I turned around she was gone.
Ross: Hey. Rachel, I-I-I've been wanting to tell you something for a while now and I really, I just have to get it out.
ROSS: G-gift? The thing's not the gift?
Monica: Phoebe, Ross sucks!
Monica and Ross: Scuse us
[Ross comes out of Rachel's bedroom in her bathrobe and heads for the bathroom. On his way back, Richard comes out of Monica's bedroom in her bathrobe.]
Ross: (entering carrying a garment bag) Hey!
Ross: It came in the mail today, it's uh, 72 long-stemmed red roses, one for each day that I've known and loved Emily, cut up into mulch!
Ross: Yeah, that's kinda what I meant by "bye!"
Ross: Were still married! Dont tell Rachel. See you later. (He gets up leaving Phoebe in shock.)
Ross: (to Phoebe) Hey!
Phoebe: Hello. Oh good. Ross could you put up some of these flyers for me? (He smiles at her.) OH!! Demon!! Demon!!
Ross: Pheebs
Rachel: Well then he gets a divorce, its Ross!
Ross: What?
Ross: Yeah, okay.
Ross: Oh, hi Chloe.
Ross: And then, like three days in a row he got to the newspaper before I did, and peed all over the crossword.
Joey: All right look, Ross, hes right. Emilys great, shes great! But this way too soon, youre only gonna scare her!
Ross: No Chandler, everything! Like stuff you like, stuff she likes, technique, stamina, girth....
Ross: Thanks, Dad, really, I ju... you know, I just, I just needed to know, um... when did you start to feel like a father?
Ross: Dad dad, please! As I was saying umm, Im Dr. Ross Geller. Uhh, and Im the best man. And uh, this marriage is doubly special for me umm, because not only is the groom my best friend but uh, the bride is my little sister. And, shes the greatest sister a guy could ask for. So if youd all please join me in raising a glass to the, the couple were here to celebrate. (Everyone does so.) To the Bings.
Ross: (To Phoebe and Mike) I can't believe you guys aren't going to be able to get married today.
(Chandler and Ross both laugh)
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe, Rachel, Ross, and Ryan are there. Ryan is in uniform, getting ready to leave.]
Ross: Veto. Stewart?
Ross: Ah, well all go. (motions to Chandler) Come on. (the guys leave)
Ross: Two seconds
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are arguing.]
Ross: (entering) Hey!
Ross: What are you doing?
Ross: Everything? Even the TV?
Janice: (entering) Ross you left you scarf in (sees everyone.) Hey you guys. (Does the laugh.)
Ross: Oh, who? Me?
(Ross is at a loss for words.)
Ross: 11, unbelievable 11 is correct. (The guys celebrate.) All right, thats 4 for the guys. Ladies, youre up.
Ross: Hey. Oh, Im sorry, this is Cailin.
[Scene: The Ultimate Fighting Championship, Ross and Monica are there watching Pete.]
Ross: No, its okay. Some-some kid asked me to pick it up for him, but I dont
Ross: But having a dove place the ring on your finger wouldve been no problem?
Ross: Chandler, I want you to run a post pattern to the left, okay. And sweetie..
ROSS: Yes, yes I am. Are you a, uh, a friend of Rachel's?
ROSS: (putting his arm up with his hand on the door frame.)� Why?� (He starts to lower his arm.)
Ross: Yeah, uh... and then I figured after you win, we could all go out to the balcony and see a night rainbow with gremlins dancing on top of it!
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: I know, me too. It was... You know, it was like one of those things you think is never gonna happen, and then it does, and it's everything you want it to be.