words in movies
Ross: Excuse me?
Joey: I play Al Pacino's butt. All right? He goes into the shower, and then- I'm his butt. Monica: (trying not to laugh) Oh my God. Joey: C'mon, you guys. This is a real movie, and Al Pacino's in it, and that's big! Chandler: Oh no, it's terrific, it's- it's- y'know, you deserve this, after all your years of struggling, you've finally been able to crack your way into show business. Joey: Okay, okay, fine! Make jokes, I don't care! This is a big break for me! Ross: You're right, you're right, it is.
Ross: So you gonna invite us all to the big opening?
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Ross are playing chess and are both studying the board intently.]
Ross: Its your turn.
Ross: Wait a minute, are you doing that thing where you pretend it didnt go well but it really did go well?
Ross: Totally!
Ross: Great!
Ross: Wow!
Ross: Oh, I love that guy! (Laughs.)
Ross: (stops laughing) What am I doing?
Ross: Look, dont worry. Okay? Youre gonna be fine.
Ross: Yeah, none of us have to deal with pressure at our jobs.
Ross: Oh my God!
[The next flashback is from The One With Ross's Sandwich, Ross his confronting his boss about him eating Ross's sandwich.]
Ross: You ate my sandwich?
Ross: (getting upset) Oh-oh really?
Ross: (jumping to his feet in anger) What?
Ross: You-you-you-you (trying to remain in control) threw my sandwich away!
Ross: (losing control, we hear him shout outside) MY SANDWICH?!!!
Ross: MY SANDWICH!!!!!! (Ross's scream scares a flight of pigeons away.)
[The next flashback is from The One With Ross's New Girlfriend. Chandler is telling Ross and Joey that Joey's tailor took advantage of him.]
Ross: What?
Ross: What?
Joey: That's how they do pants! Ross, will you tell him? Isn't that how they measure pants?
Ross: Yes, yes it is. In prison!
[We then go into another set of flashbacks of famous fights. The first is the second breakup of Ross and Rachel from The One With The Jellyfish.]
Ross: It took two people to break up this relationship!!
Ross: I didnt know what I was taking full responsibility for! Okay?! I didnt finish the whole letter!
Ross: I fell asleep!
Ross: It was 5:30 in the morning, and you had rambled on for 18 pages. Front and back!! (they go into the living room, trapping Monica, Chandler, and Joey in the kitchen) (to Rachel) Oh-oh-oh, and by the way, Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means you are, Y-O-U-R means your!
Ross: (starts to cry) FINE BY ME!! (he opens the door and traps Chandler behind it)
Chandler: Du-du-I wrote it, I wrote it on the board! I wrote it on the board, then I went all over New York City looking for ya! I went to Rosss! I went to the coffeehouse! I went to any place that they made sandwiches!
(Suddenly Ross jumps up from behind the counter armed with a plastic gun. By the way, hes overacting too.)
Ross: Thatll be a neat trick, when youre, (looks at the script) when youre dead!
Joey: Ross, you dont have to yell.
Ross: There was just an explosion, okay? My hearing would be impaired.
Phoebe: I thought you were excellent! In fact for a minute there I was like, "Ooh, whered Ross go?"
Ross: Thank you! And I have to say that first scene when you meet Mac
Ross: Oh my God. I mean
Phoebe: (To Ross) Hes holding us back.
Ross: Totally.
Joey: So what's it gonna be? (Monica whispers in Joey's ear. Ross gets up and waves arms frantically in protest)
Ross: No, I arranged that...
Monica: Oh please! Why else would you have made out with Ross?!
Ross: You... you dated Albert Wintermeyer?
ROSS: Yeah, c'mon I mean I though, you know, I thought we're just foolin' around. Like when, uh, when we were kids.
Phoebe: Hey Ross!
Ross: Who is intimidating to a guy who won the Nobel Prize?
Ross: Oh yeah? no, no Nobel Prizes for him?
Ross: What? (turns around to look at Rachel)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Ross are laying out the ground rules for the maid of honor auditions to Rachel and Phoebe.]
Rachel: Come on! I think this is funny! (Ross leaves)
Everyone almost simultaneously except Ross: yeah thats a great idea!
Ross: Thats not really porn.
Ross: Nice to meet you.
[Scene: The roof, Joey is walking towards Ross with a guy]
Ross: (popping up behind Joey wearing an Indian headdress) Come on, it's fun!
Ross: I'd lead with that.
Ross: I uh, went to a bar. And then I just uh, just walked around for a while.
Ross: And sexy.
Ross: I dont know what to say, Im sorry. Though, youre not supposed to take these. (Points to the bone) Its like a million years old, we, we actually, we had people looking for that.
Ross: It's actually a 1,000,000$ prize.
Ross: Stop going through my stuff (walks away)!
Ross: You have to tell her! You have to tell her! It's your moral obligation, as a friend, as a woman, I think it's a feminist issue! Guys? Guys? (waiting for guys to chime in)
Joey: Good call. Yeah. But, the face Ross, the face isnt Rachel.
Ross: Cassie, how you-how you doin on that hot dog.
Ross: Hey, I thought I'd end up kissing Charlie too ok? But SURPRISE!
Ross: Why do you care so much?
Ross: Oh. (Reaches into his pocket for some money as Rachel enters the living room and watches holding two stuffed dinosaurs.)
(cut to Ross and Charlie)
Rachel: All right, so... Ross, you're ok with all this? I mean...
Ross: I'm gonna get some more coffee.
(Joey and Charlie enter. Ross looks at her)
Ross: Ok. (they both go)
Ross: Yeah, I know the type.
Ross: Okay! Okay! Fine, Ill stop! No teaching, okay? Well just watch the pretty light streaking across the sky. (Comets dont streak across the sky, meteors do.) Okay? Whos official name is Bapstein-King.
Ross: Totally insane. Dude, let's drive home, we'll hit all the maple candy stores on the way back and if...if they're closed maybe we'll tap a tree and make some ourselves.
Joey: Ross!
Ross: Hi!
Ross: Get to the problem!
Ross: You were saying you didn't want to seem stupid.
Policeman: Its Petty. (He grabs Rosss license.) Ill be right back with your ticket. (Walks back to his car.)
Ross: Ok. Let's see. Oh, you should take her to the MET!
Ross: As my lawfully wedded wife, in sickness and in health, until death parts us. Really, I do. Emily. (Points at her.)
Ross: Yeah. Look if-if shes gonna end up with somebody else, the truth is she couldnt find a better guy. So
Ross: The data we are receiving from MRI scans and DNA testing of these fossils are - are staggering.
Ross: Ok.
Joey: You do have a choice!! Ross, why are you listening to her?! Are you, are you crazy?!
Joey: An annulment? Ross! I dont think surgerys the answer here.
Rachel: Oh, hon can you grab me my other box of tissues? Theyre right on that chair under Rosss coat.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's. Emma is in her bed and Ross and Rachel are rapping and dancing for her.]
Ross: Yeah, yeah that means... you know? We just... we don't have time for this.
Phoebe: Well, Ross does. What... You're - you're ruining the plan! Joey, you've - you've fixed him up with his perfect woman!
Ross: Y'know, here's the thing. Even if I could get it together enough to- to ask a woman out,... who am I gonna ask? (He gazes out of the window.)
Ross: Wow. What does that mean?
Ross: I always knew I was havin a baby, I just never realised the baby was having me.
Ross: No! (Slaps his hand)
Ross: Ok! So let's move on to the Renaissance?
Ross: Oh thank God, I thought she had two heads.
Ross: Yeah? Joey really knows his art, huh?
Ross: Hey, how was the Met?
Ross: Haha! Got ya! Die, die, die!
Ross: What?
Ross: What do you mean?
Ross: Excuse me, I don't mean to be a jerk, but the baby with the rash came in after me.
Ross: Hey!
Ross: Glad I could help man.
Charlie: Yeah, let's go. (stands up and kisses Joey) (to Ross) Thanks Ross.
Joey: (aside, to Ross) Hey Ross! That art stuff worked, you hooked me up.
[Scene: San Diege Zoo. Ross is still at the monkey cages. A janitor is sweeping.]
Ross: (entering) Hey, you guys!
Ross: Professor Sherman, yeah. I've a meeting with him today.
Ross: It's in Barbados.
Ross: So, uh, this guy, she used to go out with, is, uh is he a good guy?
Ross: So-so what did the doctor say?
Ross: (puzzled) What?
Ross: Really? That would be great. I mean, I have to do something, she kinda teased me about how I dress.
Ross: How do you feel about all this?
Ross: Oh, that's not what you want...
Ross: Eh..actually no, I don't need to because your little "Ross is dead" joke didn't work, ok, there were no responses. Nobody posted anything on the website, nobody called my parents, so the joke my friend is on you. Nobody called, nobody wrote anything, nobody cares that I'm dead. (silence) Oh my God! Nobody cares that I'm dead!?
Charlie: Oh I can't... I have seminars all day and I promised Ross I would look at his speech.
Ross: Take thee, Rachel...(All his friends have looks of shock on their faces. He realizes what he said. Quickly he says.) Emily. (A slight chuckle.) Emily.
Ross: Really? Sounded like Three Blind Mice.
Ross: Four percent. Okay. I tip more than that when theres a bug in my food.
Rachel: (giggles) (To Ross) I can imagine you in a short plaid skirt and knee socks.
Ross: Not the first two, but the second two- woooo! ...I love you guys. You guys are the greatest. I love my sister (Kisses Monica), I love Pheebs... (Hugs her)
Ross: Joey! Hey, I need to talk to Charlie. Is she there?
Ross: Barbados.
Ross: You know, if it�s meant to be, I�ll guess it. Bye, bye.
(Ross drags Joey into the hall and slams the door)
Ross: Dr. Gettleman? Yeah I know, I don't think that's a good idea. In fact, I think he's dead.
Ross: Actually, it looks really good. (Turns towards the window and now Phoebe starts jumping to divert his attention.)
Ross: (continuing) I just found out that Elizabeths dad wants to meet me.
Joey: (sees Ross) Hey all right, Ross came as doody.
Joey: Hey Ross, wouldn't it be great if we could go two straight hours without dropping it?!
Ross: Wha...? Oh sure, now they lock it, but when they're having sex on the couch, its like: "Come on in, my butt is surprisingly hairy".
Rachel: Yes, I know! And Joey knows! But Ross doesn't know so you have to stop screaming!!
(Ross mouths to Chandler, "Thank you," and he mouths, "Youre welcome," back.)
Ross: (to Emma) Can you say Barbados?
Ross: Alright, alright, now-now who should I say tricked me into doing it?
Ross: Uh, uh... Sure! Uhm... "Dear..." (he takes the notepad)