words in movies
[Scene: A Street, Chandler and Ross are at a newsstand.]
Ross: (noticing a beautiful woman moving in down the street) Well hello! Shes cute! Should we uh, go try to talk to her?
Ross: Uh yeah! Let me, let me get that for you.
Ross: (exhales) I got it. (He lifts the box and grunts under the strain.) (Calmly) So hi, Im uh, Im Ross and this is my friend Chandler. (He shyly waves.)
Ross: Kristen, hi. Are you uh, new to the area, cause if you are Id love to show you around sometime.
Ross: Ah.
Ross: Yknow actually it does have a very interesting history. Uh, this street is the first street in the city to have an underground sewer system. (Kristen crinkles her nose at that.) Before that sewage and waste would just flow right down the street. Yeah, sometimes ankle deep! (He stops when he realizes what hes talking about.)
Chandler: (To Ross) Smooth.
Ross: Umm, say youre gonna be starving after all this moving. What do you say I take you to dinner tonight?
Ross: Yeah?
Ross: Great! Uh, let me take this up for you. (The box hes holding.)
Ross: Oh no-no, after you. (She grabs a chair and heads upstairs.) (When shes gone.) Oh my God! (He drops the box and Chandler cant pick it up.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Ross are there.]
Chandler: So Ross, how was your date the other night? Did you tell her about the magical ride that starts with the flush of every toilet?
Ross: Laugh all you want but uh, she actually left me a message saying shed like to go out again.
Ross: Yeah in fact, Im gonna go call her right now. And Ill make sure to tell her my friend Chandler says (He mimics the shy reaction Chandler did.)
Chandler: Excellent! Yknow Ross met somebody too!
Ross: (returning) Hey.
Ross: Oh great! Were going out again Saturday. But I just found shes also seeing some other guy.
Chandler: (sarcastically shocked) Really?! Joe? What would you do if you were in Rosss situation?
Ross: Well you shouldnt be. Believe me I wouldnt want to be the guy whos up against you. (Chandler laughs.) I mean that doofus is going to lose!
Chandler: So this is nice! I wish I didnt have to go, believe me! But unfortunately I have to. (He gets up and Joey moves over next to Ross.) Oh uh, by the way, whats the name the girl youre dating?
Joey and Ross: Kristen Lang.
Ross: Well obviously only one of us can keep dating her.
Ross: Well now lets-lets look at this objectively, I think I should date her
Ross: Thats interesting, but check this out. I date her
Ross: Okay, okay. This can go on for a while.
Ross: No Joey! Look why dont, why dont we just let her decide? Okay? Hey-hey, well each go out with her one more time. And-and well see who she likes best.
Ross: Maybe Ill take her to that new French restaurant down the street
Ross: Well sorry, thats what I do on dates.
Ross: So lets decide on the spending limit
Ross: I was thinking more like a hundred.
[Scene: Ross's apartment, Ross is getting ready for his date with Kristen.]
Ross: Hey! Whats up?
Ross: Oh thanks!
Ross: We have 8:00 reservations at Grammercy Bistero.
Ross: I am dressed.
Ross: I have an oily T-zone!
Ross: Thats right.
Ross: Uh actually, I sent the flowers before the actual date. So techincally, technically I didnt break any rules. Thanks for stopping by though.
Ross: Oh yeah? What are you gonna do?
Ross: Why am I not surprised?
Joey: Yknow what Ross? Im not gonna let you get away with this!
Ross: I dont think you have much choice.
Ross: Bye-bye!
Ross: Yes. Yes. Just here (Runs his fingers down the bridge of his nose) and there (Runs his fingers across his forehead).
[Scene: Grammercy Bistero, Ross and Kristen are waiting for their table to be ready. Ross is returning from talking to the matired.]
Ross: So they said our table will be ready in just a few minutes.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Oh yeah its fine. I guess the more muscles you have the more they can spasim out of control.
Kristen: Well uh, Ross? This is Joey. Joey? Ross.
Ross: Hi. (They shake hands.) Its nice to meet you. I used to have a friend named Joey. I dont anymore.
Ross: Yeah. So
Ross: So Joey umm, you look familiar. Are uh, are you on TV or something?
Ross: Thats right! Thats right, dont you play a woman?
Ross: Much better.
Joey: So yknow Ross its funny cause, you look familiar to me too. Have you ever been married?
Ross: Well yes, yes I have. In fact umm, just the other day Kristen and I were talking about how Ive been married and how I have a son.
Ross: Thats right! Wait no, Ben.
Ross: Well umm
Ross: Yes. And another time after that. Boy Im getting hungry! Hey Joey, have you ever been so hungry on a date that when a girl goes to the bathroom you eat some of her food?
Joey: (laughs that one off) Yeah. So uh Ross, well nowwhy did that first marriage breakup? Was it because the woman was straight or she was a lesbian?
Joey and Ross: No. No.
Joey: No. It just seems like Ross is the kind of a guy that would marry a woman on the verge of being a lesbian and then push her over the edge.
Ross: Wait a minute! Were you on a poster for gonorrhea?
Ross: Hey you leave Marcel out of this!
Ross: Hey-hey have you ever locked yourself in a TV cabinet VD boy?!
Ross: Probably around gonorrhea.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler, Joey, and Ross are watching a basketball game on the couch.]
Ross: Yeah, laugh all you want but in ten minutes were gonna have younger looking skin!
Rachel: Oh, thank you so much for coming. Ross, get in here!
ROSS: What're you doing?
ROSS: Still doing the screening thing?
ROSS: Oh, you and me?
ROSS: Ok.
ROSS: Ok.
ROSS, CHANDLER & JOEY: Yes!
ROSS: Uh-huh.
ROSS: Would it matter?
ROSS: Mmm hmmm.
MONICA: Ross, I thought you were over this.
Ross: Getting married. (Chandler panics.) Okay. Okay. You can, you can do that too! Just like youve done everything else!
(Ross gets all excited and starts to dance on the coffee table, but slips allmost immediatly, and falls onto the couch. Rachel wakes up.)
CHAN: You know, this is actually good, because if we ever lose Ross, we have a spare.
ROSS: That is so good! Do it again!
ROSS: Well just hold him like you'd hold a football.
ROSS: Excellent!
ROSS: No no, that's me.
ROSS: Oh my god.
ROSS: Is everything ok?
ROSS: Oh, hello.
Ross: This year was supposed to be great! But, it's only the second day and I'm a loser with stupid leather pants that don't even fit!
ROSS: Ok, here, here. There we go.
Joey: No, I don't think so, see Ross, because I think you love her.
MRS GREEN: Oh hello, Ross.
CHAN, JOEY, ROSS: No!
ROSS: Rach. OK, forget, forget the lobsters OK. We're, let's talk, what about us?
Ross: Yeah, but when the baby comes shes gonna want to move.
(Rachel walks up to the gate. Cut to Ross and Phoebe who come running up to the gate.)
ROSS: It's alright, it's no big deal.
ROSS: Oooooh.
Ross: Yeah, well missy, you better be glad that list is laminated.
Phoebe: Well, I think my mother was too busy planning her suicide to provide saltwater treats. (Ross hands her one) Thank you! So what, youre just never going to tell her?
Ross: (picks up a cookie) Okay, okay, see... that... that is the problem. He is too sensitive. (takes a bite from the cookie)
MONICA: [to Ross] All right, you!
ROSS: No. Look, I told you I am not a part of this thing.
ROSS: What's the matter?
ROSS: What?
ROSS: Oh my god.
ROSS: It's ok. I'm sorry.
Phoebe: Ross, youre tired. Youve been looking all night. And clearly you suck at this.
ROSS: Carol, what's the matter? What happened?
ROSS: What?
(Both Chandler and Ross are eager to hear her decision.)
Ross: What, it's gonna be Helen Willick?
Rachel: Look Ross, if youre so freaked out, just get in the car!
ROSS: I hope Ben has a little sister.
ROSS: Uhh, yeah. I mean, actually I kinda think that we'll have, we'll have two babies.
ROSS: Yeah.
[Cut to the hallway, Ben runs upstairs with Ross in pursuit.]
ROSS: No, that's fine.
ROSS: Ok.
ROSS: Ok.
ROSS: Well, Mon, I was married.
ROSS: Yeah, you really sidestepped that land mine.
Chandler: (Continuing his toast.) And Im sure were all very excited that Ross and Emily are getting married at Montgomery Hall. I mean to think, my friend getting married in Monty Hall. (No reaction from the people.) Ohh, come on!! Monty Hall!! Lets make a Deal!! Come on, you people!! All right, forget it!! Congratulations, Ross and Emily. (He sits down.)
(The whole party gathers round as Ross puts the box on the coffee table.)
Ross: I was hugging her as a friend. Its not my fault her-her hair got in my face, shes got a lot of it and it smells all-all uh coconutty. (Phoebe raises her eyebrows.) What?! Oh, that doesnt mean I have feelings for Rachel! Maybe it means I have feelings for coconuts!
Ross: So you do know a little English.
Ross: You're sure? Nobody uh, handed out uh, mints or anything?
ROSS: Hey guys.
[Ross enters with a suitcase]
Ross: Multiple orgasms!
[Scene: Library. Ross show up with a MonkeyShine Beer poster.]
Ross: I�m serious. C�mon, you should go. Here. (shoves her outside, while she tries to stay) No, uh-uh, just go.
Joey: Uh Look Rach (Ross enters.) Hey Ross is here! Hey look! Its my good friend Ross. Hey Ross.
ROSS: Yeah, well, he's a baby not a bomb.
[Scene: Ross and Carol's, Ross and Carol are waiting anxiously for their new partner to arrive.]
ROSS: I can't believe this.
Ross: What? Okay, okay, okay, okay.
Chandler: (to Ross) "Big guy?"
ROSS: Zoo dollars?
MONICA: Look honey, I wanted you to hook up with Ross as much as you did. But he's with her now and you're just gonna have to get over it.
[Time Lapse, Ross has entered.]
ROSS: Well, we won't wanna raise kids in the city so we'll probably move to uh, Scarsdale.
[Scene: Central Perk, the gang minus Rachel and Ross are talking to Pete.]
ROSS: Newly appointed head lunch chef who is also in charge of purchasing--
ROSS: I uh, I don't know, I guess I'm just gonna see, see what happens.
(Ross is practically drooling over Rachel at this point.)
ROSS: Ooooohhhh.
(Ross keeps giggling and Rachel decides upon revenge. She gets up and kisses the rather large man in the seat in front of Ross on the back of his head. The guy turns around angrily.)
[Time lapse, Ross and Rachel are talking, Joey is on the couch, and Monica and Phoebe are out of the room.]
Ross: Hey, this- (she gives him a look and the guys back off) Heyy...
Ross: No, no, I knew (he stares at her breasts).
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is sitting on the couch, eating candy. It is raining out. Ross climbs up the fire escape and is knocking on the window.]
ROSS: Buddy, my monkey?
ROSS: That guy Lipson?
[Monica gives Phoebe a surprised expression and goes over to Ross and Chandler.]
ROSS: This is unbelievable.
ROSS: Of course.
ROSS: But you already told me everything.
Ross: Well we gotta do something, ok? Nannies like her don't grow on trees. (pause)
Joey: Now YOU'RE telling me I can't see her?? You guys are killing me! She's forbidden fruit! It's like ... like she's the princess and I'm the stable boy ... Why are you doing this, huh? Did Ross tell you not to let me go over there?
Ross: Perfect. Perfect. So now everybody's getting kissed but me.
[Scene: Kathys play, Ross and Chandler are waiting for her in the lobby after the play.]
Mona: Ohh! (Hugs him.) And I love spending time with you. (Ross isnt happy.)
Ross: Rach, I think youre reading a little too much into it.
ROSS: I know.
Joey: Monica-Monica-Monica-Monica, listen-listen, listen, listen, would-would it make you feel better if we all stop talking about Ross and Rachel.
Ross: It's a blanket Joe, not a cloak of invisibility!