words in movies
Ross: Happy birthday!!!
Ross: Weve got presents!
Ross: Oh really. Is that how you felt when you turned thirty?
Ross: Hey, 30 is not that old! Do you know how old the Earth is?
[Flashback to: The Street in front of Central Perk, Ross and Joey are holding a yellow tape across the road and everyone is cheering Phoebe as she bounces around the corner on a hippity-hop.]
Monica: Well, doing nothing on your thirtieth is better than doing something stupid, like Ross.
Ross: Hey! That was a practical purchase! I needed that car for transportation! Okay? I-I have a child!
[Flashback to: A street, Ross is sitting in his newly purchased MGB. Which is one of the better British sports cars ever made. Of course, better is a relative term. Which reminds me of a joke. Why dont the British make computers? Because they couldnt figure out how to make them leak oil. Anyway, the gang is all staring at his new purchase.]
Ross: How hot do I look in this, huh?!
Chandler: Ross, a sports car? Wouldnt it have been cheaper to just stuff a sock down there?
Ross: Thats not what this is about okay? I-I am a sports car enthusiast. I have always been into cars.
Ross: (giddy) I dont know, but-but look how shiny!
Rachel: Really! God Ross, what were you thinking? (To Phoebe, quietly) I know its really shallow, but a part of me wants him again.
Phoebe: Oh, well get in line missy. (To Ross) So, can I have a ride stud?
Ross: Hop in. (Phoebe hops in.) Get ready for the smoothest ride of your life.
Ross: Damnit! (Shuts the car off.)
Mr. Geller: Its older than that. Ross was actually conceived right near this tuxedo.
[Scene: Rosss birthday, Joey is now trying to get his car out while Ross is directing him.]
Ross: Okay, forward. ForwardStop! (The car moves an inch and Ross runs to the back of the car.) Okay, backStop! (The car barely moves and Ross runs back to the front.) Okay, forwardStop! Stop! Stop!
Monica: Ross, just forget about it. This guys got you totally wedged in.
Ross: No-no-no! Its mine! Its-its mine. (The woman walks away.)
Phoebe: (running up) Okay. Okay, heres what were gonna do. Okay, Im gonna break into this mini-van and put it in neutral. You guys push it forward so Ross can drive out of his spot. Okay? All right, here we go. (She opens her coat and reveals that thing car thieves use to break into cars as Ross jumps in behind the wheel. She inserts the device, unlocks the door, opens it, and the alarm goes off.) Haul ass!!!! (Runs off.)
(The rest of the gang runs away, except for Ross whos tramped inside his car. To hide he puts the top up as Monica, Rachel, and Joey come running past.)
Ross: Maybe that will liven up this party.
Ross: (to Tag) Stick to the list. Always stick to the list.
Ross: Hey! Look whos back! Its the birthday girl! Hows the birthday girl feeling?
Ross: What? (Glances over and sees the faces of the rest of the group, then goes and sits down.)
Ross: Which is fine! Because you just turned(Removes two candles from the cake)twenty-eight!
Rachel: No! Ross, no! It is not fine! Eh-eh-according to my plan I should already be with the guy I wanna marry!
Ross: (To Monica) Youre drunk! Mom and dad are gonna be maaaaadd! Maybe Im a little drunk.
Ross: I really wish that you wouldnt.
Ross: Come on!
Monica: I really like to say that Im-um (Pause) Yknow what Id really like to say? Im drunk!! (Mrs. Geller pulls the camera down.) Thats right mom and dad your little Harmonica is hammered!! (Ross grabs the camera out of his dads hands.) And guess what! Ive been drunk before! And Ive smoked a cigarette! And I got a box of Ding-Dongs hidden in my underwear drawer! Its all okay. Its okay because I turned thirty today. And, and I can do anything I want! Because I am a grown up. (Falls over sideways with Ross filming the fall.)
(Ross pans the camera over to Phoebe.)
[Scene: Rosss birthday, his car is still trapped in its spot. Now Joey, Phoebe, and Ross are at the front of the car with Monica, Rachel, and Chandler at the rear of the car.]
Ross: Okay, is everybody clear? Were gonna pick it up and move it. Now all we need is teamwork, okay? Were gonna lift the car and slide it out. Lift and slide!
Rachel: Ross, I really dont think
Ross: (interrupting her) Lift!! And slide!
Ross: All right everyone, lift! (They and try to lift the car, of course it doesnt raise up) And slide!! (Everyone leans over, but the car still does not move.)
Ross: God, do you realize in ten years were gonna be 40?
Joey: (crying) Why God?! Why are you doing this to us?! (He buries his head in Rosss shoulder.)
[Scene: Rosss birthday, night has fallen and Joey and Ross are walking by where his car is parked to find that both cars blocking him in have left.]
Ross: Yes! My babys finally free!
Ross: (starting it) Woohoo!
(Just as they are about to pull away, a big, fat, bald guy pulls up in the exact same car as Ross and stops next to him.)
Ross: You wanna buy a car?
(Ross shuts it off and they get out.)
Rachel: (to Ross) Yes! Did you see that?
Ross: (coming back in with Rachel) Hey, you guys! What do you, what do you think about making that beach trip an annual thing?
Ross: No.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: What a beautiful story. Hey, I'm fine by the way.
Ross: He's in! Oh, did you hear that, Marcel? San Diego. San Diego!
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross is getting coffee at the counter. Chandler walks in.]
Ross: What?
Ross: Okay, flight 421 to Paris. I don't see it, do you see it?
Will: Me and Ross. (Points at Ross.)
Rachel: Even so, I think I'm gonna pick Ross.
Rachel: I think shes checking out your beehive Ross.
Ross: C'mon! C'mon!
Rachel: Whoa, wait, listen, I think Im just gonna talk to Ross about what he think it meant.
Paul: Ross, look, I know Ive been giving you a lot of jabs and its partly because Im very protective of Lizzie, and partly because well, they just keep coming to me. But I have to admit that after all the wonderful things that Lizzie has told me and the many, many, (pause) many stories that Rachel has told me that, well (pause) youre not (pause) all bad.
[Joey and Ross make confused faces.]
Ross: Must pee. (Goes to pee.)
Rachel: I didnt have to, because I was wearing my I heart Ross sandwich board and ringing my bell.
Ross: I can't believe that didn't work!
Ross: (in a deep voice) I'll have whatever Christine is having.
Phoebe: Rach, look! (she holds two buns up to her ears to make her hair look like the Princess Leia 'do.) Oh, hi! Where is my strong Ross Skywalker to come rescue me. (Ross stands up horrified) There he is.
[Scene: The Porsche, cars are whizzing by and honking their horns on both sides very quickly as Ross creeps along.]
Ross: I've no idea, could be. Listen, I'm sorry I had to work tonight.
Ross: Well ah, Aunt Silvia was, well not a nice person.
Ross: Okay, okay, we were on the ride along with Gary, right?
Ross: Yeah. Do that for another two hours, you might be where I am right about now. (He enters.)
Ross: Monica? You're Mom.
Ross: Of course not, I'm... suggesting Geller-Willick-Bunch.
Ross: You're right, you're right, it is...So you gonna invite us all to the big opening?
Ross: Actually, do you guys mind staying here for a while?
Carol: Ross, you remember Susan.
(After she's left, Ross gets really happy and starts kissing the card. Suddenly, she returns.)
Ross: Over here. (You can see Ross sitting at the far wall.)
Rachel: Well, Ross, we were worried about you. We didn't know how you were going to react.
Ross: Yeah! I know! It was. Oh the only sad thing is I wasnt around when it happened for the first time.
Ross: Oh, shhh, shh. Magic is about to happen.
Ross: No? What happened, big guy?
Ross: (to Gary) He told you everything! I mean you totally cracked him!
Ross: Oh whats the big deal?! I wasnt even invited to the ceremony, just the reception. And-and yknow what? If it makes you feel any better, Joan and I will just make an appearance and then, and then well-well leave early as a sign of protest.
Ross: Doesn't sound as crazy as paying a thousand dollars for a cat.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is on the phone with her mother. Phoebe, Rachel, and Ross are there.]
Ross: The word you're looking for is 'Anyway'...
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is showing Ross, Rachel, Joey, and Phoebe his engagement ring again.]
Rachel: Its a truffle. Its got all of these layers. First theres a layer of ladyfingers, then a layer of jam, then custard, which I made from scratch, [Joey and Ross make impressed faces] then raspberries, more ladyfingers, then beef sauteed with peas and onions, [Joey and Ross look like somethings wrong.] then a little more custard, and then bananas, and then I just put some whipped cream on top!
Ross: Okay. I think it's time to change somebody's nicotine patch. (Does so.)
[Cut to inside the apartment, Ross decides to let Monica in and goes over and opens the door in mid-pound.]
Ross: Some can sing, some can dance. I apparently can turn phallic cakes into woodland creatures.
Rachel: Um... Ross?
Ross: That's my sister.
Ross: Pheebs, what about you?
Ross: Well, it was the only thing to do there that didn't have a line.
Ross: Step back.
Ross: Come on.
(Chandler laughs, turns, and sees that Ross and Joey arent happy.)
Ross: You won an adult Thanksgiving day spelling bee.
Ross: Mmmm.
Ross: I do.
(Ross gets up, pleased with himself.)
Ross: Wow, how many have you got?
Ross: Shhhh!
Chandler: Y'know what this is like? This is like when my parents got divorced. Man, I hope Ross doesnt try to kidnap me after Cub Scouts.
Joey: Okay, if Ross and Rachel ask, I've been here the whole time. THE WHOLE TIME!
Ross: Oh. Hel-lo!
Ross: See?
Joey: Uh hey look uh Ross, look I think we need to talk about before.
Ross: I'm going to do it.
Ross: Gimmie! (Takes the ring and puts it in his coat pocket as Rachel enters the hallway.)
Ross: Yes, yes, that's right...
(Ross flinches in pain.)
Rachel: All right Monica, do you want to know why I was with Ross tonight?!
Ross: (nonchalantly) Yeah?
Ross: But is it technically a date if the other person doesn't show up?
Ross: How come? Everybody else does.
Ross: It's not that easy, there's still a lot of relationship stuff.
Rachel: And Ross.
Ross: Kay, first of all, this attitude is not helping.
Ross: I dont know, I-I was all high.
Ross: No no no, go-
(Suddenly, theres movement beside her, startling her. Its Ross! He wakes up and they both start screaming in terror. Then they both grab their heads having aggravated their hangovers.)
Ross: Okay. Um is he a good guy?
Mrs. Green: With another woman. Have you no control Ross?
Ross: Wha-What did he say that was so funny?
Ross: Carol was wearing boots just like those the night that we- we first- y'know. Fact, she, uh- she never took'em off, 'cause we-we- (off Chandler's look) Sorry. Sorry.
Joey: Look, Ross look, Im on board about this totally honesty thing, I am, just not about stuff thats gonna get you in trouble.
Ross: That's... that's classic.
(Ross looks at Joey.)
Ross: Thing, yes. Thing.
Paolo: Ross!
Ross: Paolo. Hi.
Ross: Yeah! Se vice?
Ross: Well umm, oh! I might be teaching another class this semester!
Ross: I dont know, aheh, yours was the first name that-that popped into my head, Im Im sorry. I-I didnt think it would matter.
Ross: Thank you.
Ross: Great! Great. Then I mustve left it at Monas. I knew it!
Ross: Oh.. oh... oh.
Ross: That guy, he burns me up.
Ross: No you didn't. You said you would, but you never did!
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler, Ross, and Julie are sitting on the couch.]
Ross: Kinda... spooky without any lights.