words in movies
Ross: (entering) Hey, you guys... I have great news.
Monica: Ross, we're kind of in the middle of diner here.
Ross: Oh, well, er, I already ate, but sure...! (they all look at each other when Ross grabs a plate) Guess what happened at work today...
Ross: Try sixty-five million years ago, and then try sssshhhhhh.... My tenure review board met today and I hear it's looking really good.
Ross: Yeah. Do you have any idea what this means in academic circles, uh? I am gonna get laid.
Ross: No, no. I-I'm good.
Ross: I'm up for tenure.
Ross: You too! What are the odds?
(Ross enters with a bottle in his hand)
Ross: Hey! Wha-hoo! What's this? (showing the bottle) Well it's a, it's a bottle of champagne. Why is this here?
Phoebe: Ross...
Ross: I guess it's here because I GOT TENURE!
Ross: This is the single greatest day of my professional career. Gunther, six glasses!
Ross: Oh, I thought Joey was here. Five is good. (Gunther leaves, hurt) Well, I'm gonna have a loogie in my coffee tomorrow.
Ross: I got tenure. I didn't win the lottery... Hey Rach, so uh... how did your thing go?
Ross: Oh, you know what? You're gonna get it. I-I-I-I can feel it.
Rachel: Ah, all right. Here's to Ross!
Ross: And-and to years of hard work finally paying off.
Ross: But also knowing it means a lot.
Ross: ...that center around work.
Chandler: To Ross!
All (except Rachel): Ross!
Ross: You know what the best part about this is? I can never be fired.
Ross: No seriously. I have job security for life. You know, I never have to worry. (Rachel starts crying) Oh, look at you. Look how happy you are for me.
Ross: Rach, I'm so sorry.
Ross: Great. I feel like an idiot.
Ross: Oh... (to the others) Little heads-up would have been nice.
Joey: (frustrated) Ahh! There's gotta be a way. I mean, you know, if Monica and Chandler move out here and now Phoebe is married to Mike. That just leaves me and Ross and Rach, you know what I mean?
(In the meantime, Ross is trying to squeeze and push a rather large chair through the revolving doors of the Ralph Lauren building.)
Rachel: (annoyed) Ross, what is taking you so long?
Ross: (stares at her through the door and starts pushing the chair harder, looking very annoyed. He finally manages) (sarcastic) I'm sorry, it's almost as if this wasn't built for a quick getaway!
Rachel: I'm fantastic. You remember Ross?
Mark: Sure, sure. (To Ross) What's with the chair. (Rachel signals him not to mention she's been fired)
Ross: Uh, you know, you can't always get a seat on the subway, so... (laughs stupidly)
Ross: Yeah! yeah, I got tenure! (Mark looks at him strangely and walks off)
Ross: See? I told you something good would come along. And he seemed really nice. I've met him before?
Rachel: Ross! That's Mark. From Bloomingdales? You were insanely jealous of him.
Ross: (realizing) That is Mark?
Ross: I hate that guy.
Ross: No, no, NO, you cannot go to dinner with him.
Ross: Oh yeah, I'm sure he's gonna give you a job. Maybe make you his SEXretary.
Ross: I'm serious. I just don't trust that guy, okay?
Rachel: Ross, you know what? (looks over to the door and sees security staring at them) Okay, let's talk about it later, there comes security. (Takes her box and leaves. Ross follows her and then returns for the chair. He stands for a moment, then pushes it quickly in the general direction Rachel went into, and out of the camera's view, and then nonchalantly walks away)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's apartment. Ross enters.]
Ross: Hey, is Rachel here?
Ross: She's still at dinner?
Ross: That guy Mark. From Bloomingdale's... She thinks he's just being nice to her. But I know he really wants to sleep with her.
Ross: We ran into him on the street today and he said he might have a job for her. But I know he just wants to get into her pants.
(She looks at Ross, a bit ashamed. Chandler mimes "big breasts" to Ross and lip syncs "Wow". Ross looks at him, astonished and then Monica looks at Chandler again. A little too late he changes the "big breasts" mime into "rocking a baby". When he realizes Monica might have seen it he also strokes his imaginary baby's head.)
Ross: Hey, so uhm... How was dinner?
Ross: (speaking without pause, agitated) Oh yeah? Yeah? I wonder why? What could that smarmy letch possibly want?
Rachel: Oh Ross, come on. He's happily married. His wife just had twins.
Ross: Should we send something?
Ross: Congratulations!
Ross: Can we, can we just stop for a second? Who said something better would come along, huh? You didn't believe me. I told you everything was gonna work out. (gasps) You know what? This calls for a bottle of Israels finest.
Ross: Well, for one thing, she keeps calling her Ella! Rachel: (Defends Amy) Wha.. well, Ella's a nice name!
(Ross finally looks at the woman kissing Mark.)
(Ross starts laughing)
Ross: Fine.
Ross: I know!
Ross: Ive said it! Okay?! But its over Joey!
Chandler: (Angrily) Alright, whoever this is, stop calling me! (Ross and Joey laugh silently.) Its been six months! Its not funny!
ROSS: Fine, OK! Heat, heat, heat, and I'm the obsessive one. [goes to the radiator and starts turning the knob] OK, this way is on, so this is. . . [breaks off the knob] off.
Ross: (normal voice) No, go on! It's Paul the Wine Guy!
[Monica picks up the bag, while Ross closes the door and hits Monica with his tail. They walk into the living room, and Monica empties the bag.]
[cut to later, Rosss team has the ball.]
Ross: Yeah. (closes the door, and goes over and kisses Rachel.)
Ross: Did you get like a fresh batch of pregnancy hormones today?!
Monica: Well, you guys have been friends forever. Remember the first time that you kissed Ross? How weird that was? You couldn't stop laughing? You got through that.
Ross: Mitzi is.....
Ross: Oh, yeah, why not?
Ross: Did homo-erectus hunt with wooden tools?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Monica are sitting on the couch playing cards, and Phoebe is working on a new song.]
Chandler: Okay, I went over to Ross' apartment to bring back Clunkers. Yknow, for you, and (Clears his throat) I left the door open and she must have gotten out and I looked everywhere, all over the apartment, including the roof, which FYI Ross, one of your neighbors, growing weed. I couldn't find him, and I am so, so, so, sorry. But I do know where we could all go ease the pain. (Points up and then over to the street)
Ross: You guys, you know what, you know what, it doesn't matter, because you both have to go get dressed before the big vain in my head pops. So..
Cailin: (to Ross) Hi! Remember me?
Ross: Its like that everywhere, Joey! Okay, Mon, back me up here. Where you work the uh, waiters eat with the waiters, right? And the chefs eat with the other chefs, right?
(Phoebe, Joey and Ross laughs again)
Rachel: I feel like were the only two people in the world. (She sets down her wine class, picks up a walnut, and knocks another one on the floor.) Oops. Sorry. (She reaches down to pick it up and Ross hands it to her. Ross is hiding under the couch and causes Rachel to scream.)
Ross: (to the rest of the gang) Were just gonna be friends.
Ross: (quickly talking) Hello, baby. Hello, hello.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Yeah, okay you're right.
[Cut to later in that episode. Ross is showing his boss his new place and notices something in the window.]
Cheryl: (sneaking up behind Ross) Guess who?
Phoebe: (Grabs the pictures) Oh! Here we all are! Yeah, there's Ross and Joey and you and me. (She picks up a magic marker and draws herself in. Monica can't watch.)
Ross: Fine by me; hope she wins.
Ross: That cup is mine!
Ross: Would you excuse us for a second? (Pulls Rachel off to the side) Umm . what are you doing?
[Scene: Outside Cheryl's apartment, Ross and Cheryl are kissing]
Ross: (loudly) Good luck!
(Ross reveals a bag of apples.)
Ross: Oh yeah, about telling Mom and Dad, I was thinking about maybe writing a letter.
ROSS: This is so cool. You're actually gonna be on television.
Ross: Whats up? (He smiles. His teeth are freakishly white.)
ROSS: Well then that's it. And if George and Adelaide can't accept that, then the hell with them. Look, if my parents didn't want me to marry you, no way that would have stopped me. Look, this is your wedding. Do it.
ROSS: And you had no idea they weren't getting along?
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Ross are giving Phoebe and Rachel the brides maid test.]
Ross: (to Monica): Could you take it to Carol's every now and then, and show it to Ben, just so he doesn't forget me?
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: Well umm, yknow, I used to play.
Ross: Okay, guys.
Ross: Really?! I mean, really?!!
Ross: Pshhshhh!
Ross: Monicas right. Were talking about getting married here. Okay? She-she cant just rush into this.
Ross: All right, gentlemen, youre up first.
Rachel: Wh, Ross what do you want from me? You want me, you want me to quit my job so you can feel like you have a girlfriend?
Phoebe: (taking Ross aside) Have umm, have you thought anymore about you and Rachel?
Ross: Nothing. But the complaint department at the condom company got an earful. And then when I turned around she was gone.
Ross: Hey. Rachel, I-I-I've been wanting to tell you something for a while now and I really, I just have to get it out.
ROSS: G-gift? The thing's not the gift?
Monica: Phoebe, Ross sucks!
Monica and Ross: Scuse us
[Ross comes out of Rachel's bedroom in her bathrobe and heads for the bathroom. On his way back, Richard comes out of Monica's bedroom in her bathrobe.]
Ross: (entering carrying a garment bag) Hey!
Ross: It came in the mail today, it's uh, 72 long-stemmed red roses, one for each day that I've known and loved Emily, cut up into mulch!
Ross: Yeah, that's kinda what I meant by "bye!"
Ross: Were still married! Dont tell Rachel. See you later. (He gets up leaving Phoebe in shock.)
Ross: (to Phoebe) Hey!
Phoebe: Hello. Oh good. Ross could you put up some of these flyers for me? (He smiles at her.) OH!! Demon!! Demon!!
Ross: Pheebs
Rachel: Well then he gets a divorce, its Ross!
Ross: What?
Ross: Yeah, okay.
Ross: Oh, hi Chloe.
Ross: And then, like three days in a row he got to the newspaper before I did, and peed all over the crossword.
Joey: All right look, Ross, hes right. Emilys great, shes great! But this way too soon, youre only gonna scare her!
Ross: No Chandler, everything! Like stuff you like, stuff she likes, technique, stamina, girth....
Ross: Thanks, Dad, really, I ju... you know, I just, I just needed to know, um... when did you start to feel like a father?
Ross: Dad dad, please! As I was saying umm, Im Dr. Ross Geller. Uhh, and Im the best man. And uh, this marriage is doubly special for me umm, because not only is the groom my best friend but uh, the bride is my little sister. And, shes the greatest sister a guy could ask for. So if youd all please join me in raising a glass to the, the couple were here to celebrate. (Everyone does so.) To the Bings.
Ross: (To Phoebe and Mike) I can't believe you guys aren't going to be able to get married today.
(Chandler and Ross both laugh)
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe, Rachel, Ross, and Ryan are there. Ryan is in uniform, getting ready to leave.]
Ross: Veto. Stewart?
Ross: Ah, well all go. (motions to Chandler) Come on. (the guys leave)
Ross: Two seconds
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Rachel are arguing.]
Ross: (entering) Hey!
Ross: What are you doing?
Ross: Everything? Even the TV?
Janice: (entering) Ross you left you scarf in (sees everyone.) Hey you guys. (Does the laugh.)
Ross: Oh, who? Me?
(Ross is at a loss for words.)
Ross: 11, unbelievable 11 is correct. (The guys celebrate.) All right, thats 4 for the guys. Ladies, youre up.
Ross: Hey. Oh, Im sorry, this is Cailin.
[Scene: The Ultimate Fighting Championship, Ross and Monica are there watching Pete.]
Ross: No, its okay. Some-some kid asked me to pick it up for him, but I dont
Ross: But having a dove place the ring on your finger wouldve been no problem?
Ross: Chandler, I want you to run a post pattern to the left, okay. And sweetie..
ROSS: Yes, yes I am. Are you a, uh, a friend of Rachel's?
ROSS: (putting his arm up with his hand on the door frame.)� Why?� (He starts to lower his arm.)
Ross: Yeah, uh... and then I figured after you win, we could all go out to the balcony and see a night rainbow with gremlins dancing on top of it!
Ross: Yeah.
Ross: I know, me too. It was... You know, it was like one of those things you think is never gonna happen, and then it does, and it's everything you want it to be.