words in movies
ROSS: That commercial always makes me so sad.
ROSS: I meant because the monkey in it reminds me of Marcel.
ROSS: Sometimes I wonder if I did the right thing, ya know, giving him away.
RACHEL: Oh, Ross, you had to, I mean, he was humping everything in sight. I mean, I have a Malibu Barbi that will no longer be wearing white to her wedding.
ROSS: Remember when sometimes he'd borrow your hat, and, and when you got it back there'd be little monkey raisins in it.
[Ross enters with a suitcase]
ROSS: Hey guys.
ROSS: Well, there's this, uh, paleontology conference in L.A. so I figured I'd go and then drive down to the zoo and surprise Marcel.
[Scene: San Diego Zoo. Ross is at the Monkey cages.]
ROSS: Well, I uh, I can't seem to find the monkey I donated last year. He's a capuchan, answers to the name Marcel.
ROSS: Oh my God, what happened?
ROSS: I can't believe this.
ROSS: Well, ya know, someone should have called me.
ROSS: Zoo dollars?
ROSS: I was thinkin' about it.
[Scene: San Diege Zoo. Ross is still at the monkey cages. A janitor is sweeping.]
ROSS: Uhh, hey look, I don't really enjoy being with other men that way. But, um, zoo dollars?
[Scene: San Diego Zoo. Ross and the janitor are in the nocturnal house.]
ROSS: Buddy, my monkey?
ROSS: Oh my God. But the zoo told me that my monkey was dead.
ROSS: That, that's the only thing the zoo's ever told me.
ROSS: That guy Lipson?
ROSS: No, I, I only know Lipson.
ROSS: Buddy, my monkey, my monkey.
ROSS: Of course.
ROSS: This is unbelievable.
ROSS: Are you trying to get me to bribe you?
ROSS: But you already told me everything.
[Scene: Library. Ross show up with a MonkeyShine Beer poster.]
ROSS: Check it out, he actually is the MonkeyShine monkey.
ROSS: Well, I guess I'm gonna call the beer company and try to find out where he is.
ROSS: Well, there goes my whole belief system.
ROSS: That's right, he's not Drake, he's Hans Remore, Drake's evil twin.
ROSS: Hans...Hans...Yo evil twin.
ROSS: Well, I tracked down Marcel and get this, he's healthy, he's happy, and he's right here in New York filming Outbreak II - The Virus Takes Manhattan.
ROSS: I know.
ROSS: This is so exciting, I haven't seen my monkey in almost a year.
ROSS: Uh, excuse me, uh, where can we find the monkey?
ROSS: Uh, I'm sorry, you don't understand, I'm, I'm, I'm a friend of his. We uh, we used to live together.
MONICA: Ross, there he is.
ROSS: Hey, hey buddy, Marcel. Marcel. [Marcel doesn't react so Ross starts singing] In the jungle, the mighty jungle the lion sleeps tonight. [no reaction from Marcel, Monica and Joey urge him on] In the jungle, the mighty jungle the lion sleeps tonight. [Marcel looks over and everyone joins in] a-weema-way, a-weema-way..... [Marcel runs over and hops up on Ross's shoulder]
ROSS: Good morning. Hey pal, look who I brought. It's your old friend Harry Elefante. [Marcel grabs the elephant doll and throws it to the ground]
ROSS: I don't get it, he seemed so happy to see me yesterday.
[Ross enters]
ROSS: Hey Joey I have to cancel racketball for tonight, that was Marcel's trainer. He's gonna let me have him for a couple of hours.
ROSS: Hey, we can rescedule for Saturday.
[Scene: Ross's apartment. Ross is setting up for his time with Marcel. Joey is there.]
ROSS: OK, got the music, got the dinner. Oh and check it out, I made Marcel's favorite dish, banannacake.
ROSS: With mealworms.
ROSS: Hello. Oh hi, are you on your way ove-. Oh. No, no, I, I understand, I mean a monkey's gotta work. No it, it's no big deal, it' not like I uh, had anything special planned. Yeah OK, OK. OK, OK, bye.
[Scene: A fancy restraunt (Marcel's). Joey, Ross, Chandler, Susie, and the Director's Assistant are there.]
ROSS: Thanks for letting me tag along tonight you guys.
[Ross enters, sees Joey in the mirror]
ROSS: [to Joey who's looking over a toilet stall] Joey, some people don't like that.
ROSS: What? Let me see. [climbs up in the other adjoining stall]
ROSS: Hi Tushie.
CHANDLER: Alright look Ross I'll give you 50 dollars for your underpants.
[Back at the table. Joey and Ross return. Shortly, Chandler comes out, holding the stall door in front of him, and leaves.]
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross, Phoebe, and Chandler are sitting.]
ROSS: What happened?
JOEY: One of the virus victims called in sick, so Cathy recommended me and boom, I'm dying on the gurney. Oh Ross, Marcel just finished his last scene if you want to go down there and say goodbye.
ROSS: Ahh, oh that's OK, I mean, he's probably got, you know, parties to go to and stuff. But, ya know, he's moved on. Hey, that, that's the way it goes right.
ROSS: What?
["Looks Like We Made It" starts playing and we enter a whole sequence of Marcel and Ross having fun in the city.]
ROSS: Bye Marcel. See ya on the big screen. You keep people drinkin' that beer, OK. I miss you buddy.
Ross: Come on! Like I wanted him to tell you, I ran all over the place trying to make sure that didnt happen!
Ross: (To Chandler) And shame on you! You should know better, Joey needs to work. (To Joey) Now come on!
Ross: (imitating Parker) This room! This night! That waiter! His shoes! I must take a mental picture! (He backs into someone.) Ooh sorry (He looks behind him then notices its Phoebe then stops his impression.)
Monica: (holding up a small cowboy hat) This isnt mine. (Sets it down and looks at the rest of the boxes.) Hey, this isnt, this isnt my stuff! Ugh, Ross! (Grabs and holds up a doll.) These are your boxes! Where are my boxes?
Ross: (clutching a beer can and sniffing) This was Carol's favorite beer. She always drank it out of the can, I should have known.
(Ross and chandler are standing next to the alter. Ross is practicing for the wedding.)
Ross: I didnt know what I was taking full responsibility for! Okay?! I didnt finish the whole letter!
MRS. GREENE: Ross, what're you doing.
[Ross, Phoebe, Chandler, and Rachel all exchange money.]
Joey: Yeah, Ross. You and the baby just need better blocking.
ROSS: Hi, Julie. [nervous] Hi, Julie. Julie, um, how are you?
ROSS: Well, I just spoke to Carol. Ben's got the chicken pox.
Rachel: Oh, Ross, c'mon, please! Don't make this harder than it already is!
ROSS: Dad, I beg you not to finish that sentence.
Ross: Look, this is a disaster! Can't I please just go?
(They walk on. Chandler and Joey start to talk but Ross stops and whines.)
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there. Ross working on crossword puzzle, starts humming theme from The Odd Couple. Chandler joins in, followed by Monica and Phoebe, then the whole gang. Ross starts humming theme from I Dream Of Jeannie.]
Ross: Oh! And it gets worse! (Turns his side to Chandler and Monica and pulls up his shirt. There's a distinct line across his body, where his belly is very tanned and his back is very pale.)
Ross: Ohh, okay.
ROSS: Ohh, big smoker. [Packs the cigarettes and flings one on Mrs. Greene in the process. Finally gets one in his mouth and it look really out of place] Big big smoker. In fact I'm gonna go ou into the hallway and fire up this bad boy. [as he walks into the hall, he comes face to face with Mr. Greene]
ROSS: Monica, if you want, I can lend you some money.
Monica: Ross, you've got to do something about the humping.
Ross: Of course I was mad! I told you I-I hate this stuff! Okay? It-its not funny!
Ross: So Pheebs, are you gonna go back out there or what?
Ross: Is it? Feels like two.
Ross: Still, you- you say Minnie, you hear Mouse. Um, how about, um.. how about Julia?
Ross: No, but itd be nice if you realised, its just a job!
Ross: You know how close women can get.
Ross: Thanks? But I have plans; Elizabeth and I are going out of town.
ROSS: I'm telling you, there's no way he's moving back.
Ross: Turns out them Emily is just crazy about Susan. Yeah, theyre going to the theatre together! Theyre going to dinner! Theyre going horseback riding!
Ross: No, no I don't, because it's being restrung, somebody was supposed to bring me one.
Bonnie: (to Ross) Shoot! I cant go, I have to work!
[Scene: The Launderama, Rachel is there, waiting for Ross. An old woman takes Rachel's clothes off the machine and begins loading it with her things.]
ROSS: Did you see me write one down?
Ross: Well, wait a minute, wha- why is she in the title?
Ross: All right, maybe it means that too
[Ross and Rachel leave.]
Ross: Dont you realise none of this wouldve ever happened if I didnt think at that same moment you werent having sex with Mark?
Rachel: Ross! Excuse me, pardon me, excuse me....
ROSS: Oh, great. Great. There was a projectile, uh, throwing up incident, but he started it.
MRS. GELLER: Ross, whose glasses are those?
ROSS: Bye Ryan.
Monica: No, Ross, we do not hate Emily. We-we just, we just think that you're having to sacrifice a whole lot to make her happy.
ROSS: Hi, we're visitiing. It's Ben and his da-da. Da-da. Can you say da-da? Look, I'm gonna tell your momies you said it anyway so you might as well try.
ROSS: Is this what you had in mind?
[Ross picks her up.]
Ross: (pause) Yes I would.
Ross: Well, umm, why dont you give him a call?
Ross: I...reorganized the fridge. See, bottom shelf: meats and dairy. (Theres nothing on the shelf.) Middle shelf: fruits and vegetables. (Theres one lone tomato.) And top shelf: expired products. (The shelf is jammed packed.)
ROSS: Get out!
ROSS: What's she look like?
Ross: Nothing. Oh, actually, great news! I just got off the phone with Emily and it looks like I'm moving to a new apartment. Woo-hoo!
(Feeling a little better, Ross fetches more coffee.)
Ross: (less sure) Yes.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Ross are there.]
Rachel: Oh my God. I cannot keep having this same fight over and over again, Ross, no, youre, youre, youre making this too hard.
ROSS: No, no, Pheebs, we can't, ok, because--
[Ross enters, depressed.]
Ross: Well I'm sorry but you were! Okay? And besides if anyone should be hitting on her it's the guy who's single, the guy that who-who-who can do something about it.
Ross: But hey, in my defense I-I just found out condoms are like only 97% effective.
Ross: Oh. Okay, just breathe.
ROSS: Are you all right?
ROSS: Hey, there.
Ross: Okay! You guys are getting married tomorrow and-and I couldnt be more thrilled for both of you, but as Monicas older brother I-I have to tell you this. If you ever hurt my little sister, if you ever cause her any unhappiness of any kind, I will hunt you down, and kick your ass! (Chandler laughs.) What? Im-Im-Im serious! (Chandler laughs harder.) ComeHey! Dude! Stop it! Okay? Im-Im not kidding here!
Ross: Marsha, these are cave people. Okay? They have issues like 'Gee, that glacier's getting kinda close.' See?
Ross: You really serve people sneezers?
Ross: Wait! Whoa-whoa, you you gave her the ring?
[Later, Ross and Rachel are sitting in the kitchen.]
ROSS: I uh can't believe I'm gonna say this, but I think Susan's right.
Ross: What? Come on Rach, tell me what youre thinking?
Ross: Um, that is because my doctor says that I have a very serious.... nuget.... diffency.
MR. GREENE: It's not a game Ross, a woman died on my table today.
Rachel: What are you talking about, Ross, you just said that you read it twice! Look, y'know what, either it does or it doesnt, and if you have to even think about it...
ROSS: (standing up) Uh, I like to, uh, to add something to that...
RACHEL: NO but Ross. We are never gonna happen, OK. Accept that.
ROSS: (runs after her) No, Rach!
RACHEL: (to Ross) She you in the parking lot.
Ross: No, were not.
ROSS: Everybody!
Ross: Pheebs, Pheebs, the babies are coming now.
Ross: No problem, ok, mmmwa (kisses Carol) oh, mmmwa (kisses Carol's stomach, then punches Susan's shoulder) Susan... (Ross leaves.)
Ross: You dont understand! Elizabeth was about to ask me to go on a trip with her! Is that taking it slow?! No, Im not ready for this! Okay? What-what do I tell her?
Ross: Hello. (He throws his jacket towards the coat rack and misses.) Im sorry Im a little late. Ah(Checks his watch)Whoa! A lot late. Let me start by uh, by introducing myself, I am Professor Geller. (The bell rings.) So to sum up, Im Professor Geller. Good job today.
Ross: No! (Pause) Ill be right back. (Exits.)
Ross: I had a dream last night where I was playing football with my kid.
Ross: Hey, can I, can I get in on that? Because Im kinda hungry myself.
Rachel: I know. (Pause) Ross still sees his pediatrician!!! (To Ross) I don't care!
Ross: Look Rachel, I wanted to tell you, I thought I should, I-I did, and then Chandler and Joey convinced me not to.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, and Ross are there. Chandler and Joey are looking through the paper.]
Ross: (forages around) Okay, I have nothing in an evening shoe in the burgundy. I can show you something in a silver that may work.
Ross: Nope.
Ross: Hey Mon!
(Ross enters and his hair is a mess.)
Ross: (to Joey) OK, here goes.
ROSS: I talked to Rachel's sisters, neither of them can come.
ROSS: Yeah. And you should hold out for something bigger. I can't tell you how much respect I have for you not going to that stupid cab driver audition.
Ross: You need to get some sleep.
Ross: Hmm?
[Scene: Central Park, Ross is teaching Ben how to ride a bike. Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are they also.]