words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica, Rachel, Ross, and Phoebe are there. Phoebe is looking out the window.]
RACHEL: Hey.
RACHEL: Uhh, the mailman, the super.
RACHEL: What?
RACHEL: Ooh, goooosh, ooh, these are cookies smashed in the sports section.
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica, Chandler, and Joey are seated at couches. Rachel is working behind the counter.]
[Ross approaches Rachel at counter.]
ROSS: Hey Rach. I, uh, got you a little present. [Rachel is not impressed]. . I'll open it. It's a Slinky! Remember, huh. [sings] Walks down stairs, alone or in pairs, everyone knows it's. . . just a big spring. Alright, you still mad at me becuase of the whole. . .
RACHEL: Horrible and degrading list of reasons not to be with me?
ROSS: How 'bout from now on we just call it the 'unfortunate incident'? [Rachel walks off] Hey Gunther, you got stairs in your place?
RACHEL: Phoebe, I thought your dad was in prison.
RACHEL: How have you never been on Oprah?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel, Chandler, and Joey are decorating the Christmas tree.]
RACHEL: Well, that doesn't sound like a very merry Christmas.
RACHEL: No, nothin'.
RACHEL: Oh, by the way Mon, I don't think the mailman liked your cookies. Here are the ornaments your mom sent. [hands her a smashed box]
[Ross approaches Rachel, away from everyone else.]
ROSS: Hey, Rach, you know what? I think, I think I know what'll make you feel better. How 'bout you make a list about me. RACHEL: Wha... forget it Ross, no, I am not gonna stand here and make a list of. . . ROSS: C'mon Rachel. RACHEL: OK, you're whiney, you are, you're obsessive, you are insecure, you're, you're gutless, you know, you don't ever, you don't just sort of seize the day, you know. You like me for what, a year, you didn't do anything about it. And, uh, oh, you wear too much of that gel in your hair. ROSS: See there, you uhh, alright, ya, you did what I said. RACHEL: Yeah, and you know what? You're right, I do feel better, thank you Ross. [she walks off and Ross puts his hand to his hair] [Scene: Back at Phoebe's. She is on the phone] PHOEBE: Yeah, um, in Albany, can I have the number of Frank Buffay. . . OK, um, in Ithica. . . alright, um, Saratoga. . . Oneonta. Alright, you know what, you shouldn't call youself information. [hangs up] [Phoebe's grandmother enters] GRANDMOTHER: Hey. PHOEBE: Hello grandma, if that is in fact your real name. GRANDMOTHER: C'mon now Phoe, don't still be mad at me. How's it going? PHOEBE: Well, not so good. Upstate's pretty big, he's pretty small, you do the math. GRANDMOTHER: Well, I think you're better off without him. Oh honey, I know he's your daddy but, but to me he's still the irresponsible creep who knocked up your mom and stole her Gremlin. PHOEBE: No I just, just wanted to know who he was, ya know. GRANDMOTHER: I know. OK, I wasn't completely honest with you when I told you that, uh, I didn't know exactly where he lived. PHOEBE: Whattaya mean? GRANDMOTHER: He lives at 74 Laurel Drive in Middletown. If you hit the Dairy Queen, you've gone too far. You can take my cab. PHOEBE: Wow. Thank you. GRANDMOTHER: Now, remember, nobody else drives that cab. PHOEBE: Uh-huh, got it. Ooh, I'm gonna see my dad. Wish me luck, Grandpa! [blows a kiss to a picture of Einstein]
[Rachel enters from her room]
RACHEL: Oh, gosh, it's hot in here.
MONICA: Rach, get the heat. [Rachel holds up her hand with wet fingernail polish] Ross, could you turn the heat down please?
RACHEL: Did you just break the radiator?
RACHEL: I'll call the super.
RACHEL: [on phone] Hi, Mr. Treeger. Hi, it's Rachel Green from upstairs. Yes, somebody, uh, broke our knob on the radiator and it's really hot in here. Yes, it's, it's hot enough to bake cookies. Well, do you think we could have a new one by 6? Wha t, no, no, Tuesday, we can't wait until Tuesday, we're having a party tonight.
RACHEL: [answers door] Hi, welcome to our tropical Christmas party. You can put your coats and sweaters and pants and shirts in the bedroom.
RACHEL: [answering the door] Mr. Treeger.
RACHEL: Oh, yeah, well hey, welcome to our sauna.
[Ross is speaking to Monica and Rachel about tipping the super.]
ROSS: Alright, alright, here's the chance. Monica give him cash, Rachel give him your earrings. Something, now, anything. MONICA: No, I will not cave. RACHEL: Yeah, I'm with Mon. ROSS: Alright, alright, you know how you say I never seize the day? Well, alright, even though he's your super, I'm seizing. [approaches Mr. Treeger] Mr. Treeger, here is 50 bucks, merry Christmas. [Gives him the cash.]
RACHEL: What'cha gonna' do?
RACHEL: Nice seizing. . . gel boy.
MR. TREEGER: [to Rachel who is standing under mistletoe] So, uh, is this, uh, mistletoe?
RACHEL: Huh-huh, no act--no, uhh, that, that is basil.
RACHEL: Huh-hoo, yeah, no, it's still basil.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Ross, Monica, and Rachel are sitting around after the party. Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe enter.]
CHANDLER: Hey, guys, it's after midnight, merry Christmas everyone. [Ross and Phoebe hug, Monica and Rachel hug, Chandler is left standing]
RACHEL: Wiper blades. I don't even have a car.
Rachel: Whoa! Wait! Hello! What about me?
Rachel: Were not?!
Monica: I justI cant believe that you think that you and Chandler know me and Rachel better than we know you.
Rachel: All right, I like that.
Rachel: Okay, okay, okay.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Okay.
(At this moment Rachel bursts through the door. Needless to say, shes not in the best of moods having just found out Rosss dirty little secret.)
Monica and Rachel: Oh!!
Rachel: Ross, please, this is a hospital, ok? That actually means something here.
Rachel: Yeah, ohh! Why, damnit, why did I open my mouth? (In a girlish voice) I have a crush on you; I am attracted to you. (Back to normal again) Gee, I-I know that I freaked him out
Monica: Ross, Rachel promised it would be over by now. We seriously have to go, if we want to get to Vermont. I called them and the last train leaves in a half hour.
RACHEL: Um, this is gonna sound kinda goofy but uhhm, my friend over there, who cooks by the way, um, she thinks you're cute.
Rachel: Right.
Rachel: Uh-huh.
Rachel: Okay, I heard that.
[Scene: The hallway between the two apartments, Chandler, Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel are coming up the stairs.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey are there.]
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: I am jealous of her?! I mean who does she think she is?! Princess Caroline?!
RACHEL: These are from Halloween three years ago.
Rachel: Okay! I was thinking if its a girl, how about Sandrine? Its French.
Rachel: (confidently) I did!
(Monica smiles to cover her embarrassment, but Rachel sadly looks away...)
Rachel: Jeez!
Rachel: Oh. (smiles) Heres your moisturiser. Hi!
Rachel: How do you think this suit would look on an assistant buyer at Bloomingdales?
Rachel: Its coming from Joey!
Rachel: But y'know, I never really had anything to worry about. Ross was never very good at the flirting thing.
Rachel: Oh, please tell me its not because Im going with Mark.
Rachel: I hope its still funny when youre in hell.
Rachel: No, no, no, wait! Okay, okay. Don't! I'll go, I'll go!
Rachel: Lets do it! Ross?
[Scene: The hallway of Monica's building. Phoebe and Rachel are trying to find the cat's owner.]
Monica: Y'know if its any consolation, he really did sound like he was having more fun with you. (Rachel nods in agreement)
Rachel: (surprised by how ugly it is) Wow! (sarcastic) Oh, she's so nice and big! Oh, Monica, where are you going to display Gladys oh so proudly? (looks around for a spot)
Rachel: On Melanie Griffith in "Working girl". I think what you want is over here.
Rachel: So, I still have boxes here. I still have boxes at Rosss, and I have nowhere to live! Wow. I could so easily freak out right now.
Rachel: (To Ross) You know what? We should call my mum's house and say goodnight to Emma before she goes down.
Rachel: Um, there was a Geller Cup?
Monica: All right! Okay, its just Phoebe. Wills still on a diet, Chandler doesnt eat Thanksgiving food, and Rachels having her aversion to poultry.
Rachel: Oh, yes! Well have ourselves a little baby Ruth
Rachel: OK, alright, OK, um... then could you please, uh... just give him a message for me? Please? This is very important.
Rachel: Wait no, honey, honey throw it to me, throw it to me.
Rachel, Chandler, and Joey: What?
Rachel: You dont pick me! Youre stuck with me!
Rachel: Ross!
Rachel: Oh, well okay. Well, there you go.
Rachel: (Running to her room.) Hi, Pheebs.
Rachel: (coming over to Ross, who is just getting up) Are you okay?
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Over here!
Rachel: Wait, how long?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are comforting Chandler]
Rachel: Wait, what am I gonna do?
Rachel: Good! I'm glad it's not a problem.
Rachel: Okay. Okay. Itssince youve never done it before you can be Monicas made of honor.
Monica: Uh, Aunt Iris? This is Phoebe, and that's Rachel...
Rachel: You had to do it, didnt you? You couldnt just leave it alone.
Rachel: Can I see that for second.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica, Richard, Ross, and Rachel are returning.]
Rachel: Ohh, I love Joey! Joey lives with a duck! (Goes and hugs Joey.)
Rachel: Now, does it really matter?
Rachel: You know what honey, you go ahead, well call her an alternate.
Rachel: Can you not look at me when I say this? (He turns around) I thought that if I could get you here, I could seduce you.
Rachel: Down at the docks again?
Rachel: Oh no, you guys, just stay here, Im gonna go check her diaper, Pheebs you wanna come?
Rachel: Ohh!
Rachel: I went really long.
Rachel: Oh, its okay. (starts to leave)
(Monica pushes him off of the sofa as Rachel enters with a shopping bag.)
Rachel: Hm-mm.
Rachel: Oh, good, good! We had this idea to make a birthday video for Emma and we'll give it to her when she is 18.
[Scene: after the wedding, Ross and Rachel are in the lobby]
Rachel: Yeah!!! Kill um!!!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Chandler is writing a letter by the bay window as Rachel enters.]
RACHEL: Phoebe's dead.
Rachel: When did you go to a sperm bank?
Rachel: Im so sorry! Are you okay?
Rachel: Thank you! Break!
Rachel: And heels.
Rachel: Oh, I don't know. I guess it's not about no guys, it's about the right guy, y'know? I mean, with Barry, it was safe and it was easy, but there was no heat. With Paolo, that's all there was, was heat! And it was just this raw, animal, sexual...
Rachel: Thats not her name! Im sorry, she just doesnt feel like an Isabella.
Chandler: (in a manly voice) Yeah well, Im gonna go spit. (He goes into the bedroom. On his way out, Joey gives Rachel a wide berth.)
Rachel: (to Chandler) Eh, do you believe that?
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: What?
Gunther: Rachel?
Rachel: (entering) Hey Ross? Umm, I just ran into Caitlin in the hallway and-and uh, you must be getting better at this flirting stuff than I thought.
Rachel: I know I had it this morning, and I know I had it when I was in the kitchen with...
Rachel: No, hey, come on, if he asked you first, thats only fair. (leaves)
Rachel: Well Phoebe, we gotta do something! (They turn the corner.) Well, yknow. I mean theres no way Joeys gonna make it in time. So Im gonna through the hotel and see if theres any other weddings going on.
RACHEL: Would you let me talk. [flicks Monica on the forehead]
Ross: Dude. Well done. You know what? If I die, and Rachel dies and Monica dies then you can totally take care of Emma.
Rachel: Well that works out good, because I'm not listening.
Phoebe: No! Because hes in love with the British chippy! Look, Rachel, if you go, youre just gonna mess with his head and ruin his wedding! Yknow, its too late! You missed youre chance! Im sorry, I know this must be really hard, its over.
Rachel: Oh. Oh, its beautiful. I see it now.
RACHEL: Only 'cause you took up half the circle.
[Scene: The hallway after the party. Rachel is sitting there.]
RACHEL: No no, 'cause mayo, that would make it gross.