words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Ross, and Monica are all there as Chandler enters wearing glasses.]
Ross and Rachel: Hey!
Rachel: Yeah, what?
Rachel: Yeah-yeah, did-didnt you use to have a pair? They were really round, burgundy, and they made you look kind of umm
Rachel: Yes!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica are making some sandwiches.]
Rachel: Oh, yknow what you should get em? One of those little uh, portable CD players.
Rachel: Yeah, and-and-and by someone, she means Joey.
Rachel: Yknow Joey, I could teach you to sail if you want.
Rachel: Yeah! Ive been sailing my whole life. When I was fifteen my dad bought me my own boat.
Rachel: What?! What?! He was trying to cheer me up! My pony was sick.
[Scene: The Mr. Bowmont (Joeys boat), shes shown to be in one of the waterways around New York, but in reality shes in a sound stage on the Warner Bros. lot and we see New York from the water in some rather poor green screen shots. Rachel and Joey are on board.]
Joey: (drinking a beer) Look at this clown! Just because hes got a bigger boat he thinks he can take up the whole river. (Yelling) Get out of the way jackass! (To Rachel) Who names his boat Coast Guard anyway?
Rachel: That is the Coast Guard.
Rachel: Joey, just ignore the boats all right? Were not finished with the lesson yet.
Rachel: Okay, Im just gonna go over the basic points just one more time, are you ready?
Rachel: Oh, okay. Is that what you want to do? You wanna go over and give a little shout out to the old, hot chickas? Okay, lets do that Sailor Joe. Quick question though, (grabs some of the rigging) whats this called?
Rachel: Wrong! How do you get the mainsail up?
Rachel: No. What do you do if I say we are coming about?
(Rachel blasts an air horn in his ear.)
Rachel: Times up, now your dead.
Rachel: Okay, you just go on and make your little jokey-jokes, but if you do not know what you are doing out at sea you will die at sea. Am I getting through to you sailor?! (She punctuates each word by slapping him on the forehead.)
Rachel: Dont just say yes! This isnt a game, Joey you can really get hurt out here. Okay, so do you want to pay attention or do you want to die?!
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Ross, and Rachel are there.]
Rachel: (laughing) Yeah, and-and you better make sure he tips you this time.
Ross: (To Rachel) Hey are you getting Monica and Chandler an engagement present?
Rachel: I dont know. Yknow, they didnt get us anything.
Rachel: Well hello! So, when are we gettin back out on the water matey?
Rachel: Why not?
Rachel: What? I was just trying to teach you.
Joey: Well, lesson learned! Rachel is mean!
Rachel: Excuse me, I wanted you to help, but you couldnt move your arms because you were wearing three life jackets.
Rachel: Look Joey, Im sorry if-if you thought that was mean, but I gotta tell ya something. That was not mean. Okay, my father is mean. He used to yell at me all the time on the boat, I mean it was horrible. I was just being a good teacher.
Rachel: Well, does a good student drink seven beers during his first lesson?
Rachel: Yeah, I didnt want you to get hit by the boom!
Rachel: All right, yknow what? I-Im sorry. I will try to tone it down and uh stop yelling.
Rachel: I wont boss you around.
Rachel: And, Ill be nice.
Rachel: AndJoey!
[Scene: The Mr. Bowmont, its Joeys second lesson with Rachel as the resident sailing expert.]
Rachel: Okay Joey honey, youre doing really good! All right, now Im just gonna need you to step to the port side. (Joey pauses as he tries to remember which side is the port side.) Remember? Remember how we talked about the port side?
Rachel: Right?
Rachel: Its left sweetie, but thats okay sweetie, thats a tough one.
Rachel: Okay, go to the left. (Joey goes starboard or sits on the right side of the boat.) The left!
Rachel: (yelling) Just sit over there!! (Points to the port side.)
Rachel: No! No-no, no-no-no, very quiet, said with love, no yelling.
Rachel: Okay Joey, were luffing a little bit, so could you tighten up the cunningham? (The mainsail has started to flap in the wind and has stopped working efficiently; she wants him to tighten it so that it starts working again.)
Rachel: Joey, come on! We just went over this! (She does it instead.)
Rachel: (angrily) No! All right?! I did not see the bird! I did not see the fish! I did not see the piece of Styrofoam that was shaped like Mike Tyson! I did not, because I was trying to teach you how to sail a boat! Which obviously is an impossible thing to do!
Rachel: What do you mean you quit?! You cant quit!
Rachel: Because youre not finished yet and I wont have it! Greens do not quit!
Rachel: Oh my God, wait did II just said Greens dont quit didnt I? (Pause) (Angrily) Did I just say Greens dont quit?!
Rachel: No! No! No! Im not yelling at you, Im just yelling near you. Oh God Joey, ohh Im my father. Oh my God, this is horrible! Ive been trying so hard not to be my mother I did not see this comin. Oh, Joey, Im sorry. Im so sorry. I just wanted you to learn.
Rachel: Really?
Rachel: Awww
Rachel: Left.
[Scene: The Mr. Bowmont, is tied up alongside the pier; Joey and Rachel are relaxing.]
Rachel: Well Joey, I hate to admit it, your way of sailing is a lot more fun.
Rachel: Ohh were not sailing.
Rachel: All right. (She does so and it brings the cooler closer together.) Hey-hey-hey!! (Sees whats in the cooler.) Sandwiches!
Rachel: (hands him one) Here you go.
Rachel: Oh wow! (She takes a bite, but holds the sandwich vertically so that the stuff falls out.)
Rachel: Ohh, sorry.
Rachel: Ohh whoops.
Rachel: You can?
Rachel: Um-hmm.
Rachel: Okay.
(They grab the luggage and drag it into Joey and Rachels forcing Monica and Chandler to follow.)
Rachel: (depressed) Hi.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: All right.
Rachel: Okay.
(Enter Rachel and Paolo. They are both somewhat flustered)
Rachel: Ow!
[Scene: A couch store, Ross is trying to decide on a new couch for his place. He has dragged Rachel along for the trip, and she's not too happy about it. Ross is sitting on it in different ways to see how it feels. He tries to just sit on it normally, and then he tries flopping on it. One thing about this couch, it's huge. It's like twice the size of a normal full size couch. Whoever designed this thing, needs help and fast.]
RACHEL: OK, OK, that is my favorite sweater, that is my third date sweater.
Rachel: Oh, Ive got big Valentines plans! Ive got my Chinese food on the way, and the rest of your saltwater taffy!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Rachel, Chandler, and Phoebe are there.]
Rachel: Yes, you didOh my God you didnt! (Screams) Well then why didnt you tell me that before?!
Rachel: Pheebs?
RACHEL: What'cha gonna' do?
Phoebe: IRachel, you cant go! Ross loves Emily!
Phoebe: Alrighty, here come the water works. (Rachel starts crying harder.)
Rachel: OhhDo you think he will?!
Rachel: Okay. (picks up phone) Are you sure you wanna hear this?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Continued from earlier, Rachel is now telling everyone of her experience in the garbage room.]
Monica: Ross and Rachel don't know what they're talking about. I mean its not like their so responsible. Emma is a product of a bottle of Merlot and a five year old condom.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is entering, Monica and Rachel are talking on the couch.]
Rachel: Well, now, wait. Now Im all freaked out. Come on, you guys will watch it with me.
Rachel: Well, hon-ey. I'm just trying to look nice for your big night.
Rachel: Excuse me, Dr. Bobby happens to be an excellent doctor.
(Rachel comes out of her room, suddenly she remembers leaving the message.)
Rachel: Ohh, thank you, thank you, thank you.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel folding and packing clothes in suitcases as Phoebe enters.]
Rachel: Bye. (She gets up to leave but is stopped by Joey)
Ross: I'm sorry, Rachel, this is Charlie Wealer, she's a collegue.
Mr. Zelner: Hello Rachel, you uh, got a minute?
Rachel: Whoops. (Starts to go into Chandler and Joeys.) Oh, hey, do you need help with that?
Rachel: Not working with me, Joe! Here's the thing: lately I have been having thoughts (pauses) musings, if you will!
Rachel: Phoebe, we cant, we just cant just let it happen! Okay, we have to do something! We have to break them up! Okay? Just go in there and like, shave her head! You owe me one bald girl!!
[Rachel, seeing what he did for her, gets up, walks across the room, and kisses Ross]
Rachel: Look, If I dont get to London!! He is going to marry that other girl!!!
RACHEL: Well, how did you find out?
Rachel: Yeah?
Rachel: Anyway, theres this big charity ball this weekend and Ralph Lauren bought a table, so I kinda have to go
Phoebe: (raises hand) Oh! I know! (Rachel startled) It's because... he's gorgeous, and he's charming, and when he looks at you...
Rachel: You guys, come on, it doesn't matter why we're late. We're all here now, please let us in so we can have some of your delicious turkey. (A slice of turkey on a piece of aluminum foil is slid under door)
Rachel: (taking a bite) Hmmm!
Rachel: Oh, I found him. He was Paolo's cat.
RACHEL: Ya know, in crazy world, that means you're married.
Rachel: But he has to know how I feel!
Transcribers Note: This is stuff we never saw from all of the seasons, so for all of the scene settings I will be using the current arrangements. Even though some of the out takes take place when Chandler was living with Joey and Rachel was living with Monica, when Joey and Chandler were living in Monica and Rachels, and the current arrangements.
Big Nosed Rachel: Oh! No, not really.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel and Fake Monica are there.]
Rachel: What? Uhh, Phoebe, honey, honey, I know you're quirky and I get a big kick out of it, we all do actually, but if you destroy a coat like this that is like a crime against nature! Not nature, fashion!
Rachel: Ill figure something out.
Rachel: (to the closed door) Hang in there. You hang in there. (Gives him the raspberry.)
Phoebe: Did you stop Rachel?
Rachel: Oh Ross, you're so great. [she playfully rubs his head and gets up]
Rachel: Yeah, because I was mad at you, not because I stopped loving you!
[Scene: The street in front of Central Perk, Ross is walking up and sees two women that look like Phoebe and Rachel from behind.]
RACHEL: Okay, now that is the third time someone has said something like that to me today.
MR. GREENE: I'll never remember all of that. So uh, what's the deal? Rachel comes home, people pop out and yell stuff, is that it?
Ross: No, it's not a divorce, it is not a divorce! Anyway, I think Rachel and I need to, you know, get on with our lives, maybe, maybe start seeing other people.
Rachel: Well, are we all together? Like in a group?
Big Nosed Rachel: Happy Thanksgiving!
[Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel laugh]
Chandler: (To Rachel) Sounds like a fun party.
Joey: Half hour. (Rachel turns to look at him and he nods yes.)
Rachel: Okay, you are going to tell her and youre going to tell her now. (She grabs his nipple and starts to twist it.)
(Rachel feeds something to Paolo. He eats it and licks her hand)
Rachel: Oh my God! We are throwing the most depressing baby shower ever!
Rachel: Monica, what should I do?
Rachel: What?
Rachel: Youre bachelor pad?!
(Monica comes out of the bathroom like a bolt, and Rachel and Joey both enter.)
Rachel: Oh, hi!
(Cut to Rachel and Ross.)
Rachel: Right
Rachel: Hi! All right, lets go shoppin!!
Rachel: Ross honey, this is very nice, but, but I-I got a crisis.
Monica: Oh my God, Rachel! Hi!
Rachel: Ross said my name. Okay? My name. Ross said my name up there that obviously means that he still loves me! (They both just stare at her.) Okay, dont believe me, I know Im rightdo you guys want to go downstairs and get a drink?
Chandler: Oh, hello Rachel.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Well, look at that, same thing.
Rachel: Hello? Oh, Pheebs! (To them) Its Phoebe!
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Well, Ross said my name.
Monica: Oh, what a great argument, exhaling! All right, y'know what, Ill prove it to you, okay. Ill trade you Joey for Rachel, and Ill still win the game.
Rachel: Oh Im sorry mummys so sorry go back to sleep go back to sleep. Shh. Shhh! Go back to sleep
Rachel: Oh, Chandler!! All right, this is it! (Grabs the key) You never see Joanna again!
(Rachel looks at it and then throws it away. She then removes a fourth one, revealing a third hole.)
(He gets up and walks away as Rachel come running over all excited.)
[Cut to Monica and Rachels, theyre all there playing cards.]
Rachel: (she stops and turns) Hi!
Rachel: No well, no it's not that bad, y'know? I mean yeah, my tongue feels a little fuzzy and these fingers sort of smell, I actually feel like I can throw up.
Rachel: Yeah. Im sorry.
Rachel: I uh, I have two tickets to the Knicks game tonight if youre interested, just as a thank you for this week.
Rachel: No, youre not an idiot, Ross. Youre a guy very much in love.
Rachel: So umm, what time are you supposed to leave?
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Right!
Rachel: Good!