words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica, Chandler, Ross, and Rachel are sitting around the table.]
Rachel: (starting to cry) Ohh
Rachel: Yeah, its just yknow
Rachel: Oh! I would love to read a poem.
Rachel: (crying) Itll be a short one.
Rachel: Ohhh
Rachel: Wait, what do you mean youre getting a new brain?
Ross: (to Monica and Rachel) Its winter, they are fewer people on the street. (Rachel and Monica smile and nod, knowingly.)
Rachel and Monica: Noo!!
Rachel: She is so good at throwing drinks in peoples faces, I mean I dont think Ive ever seen her finish a beverage.
Rachel: Oh!
Rachel: Cecilia Monroe man, what a great actress.
[Scene: Phoebe and Rachel sitting on the couch in Central Perk]
Rachel: (They both look behind them.) Well, I'd have to say gay.
Rachel: Well mainly because he's kissing that other guy.
Rachel: Oh yeah he's too cute to be straight.
Rachel: All right, straight, and not subtle. (The man gets up and leaves.)
Rachel: Oh, well, we can hand it to Gunther and he'll put it in lost and found.
Rachel: What if, um, if he calls his own cell phone to find out who found it and I answer and we start talking and we fell in love. I mean wouldn't that be a great story? Kind of like a fairy tale for the digital age.
Rachel: What? Wait! Why why do you get the story?
Rachel: Phoebe, you had a date three days ago.
Rachel: Okay. Okay, see? I get the phone.
Rachel: Yeah! (Breaking up) And until now, I didnt think Id love again.
Rachel: Oh hey-hey wait! How do we fairly decide who gets the phone?
Rachel: Well umm, maybe we could uhh (Grabs the phone) Ah-ha! Too slow!!
(She holds the phone out and starts taunting Phoebe. Phoebe calming knocks the phone out of Rachels hand and catches it.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are still arguing over the phone.]
Rachel: No Phoebe! You cannot get the phone that way; thats not fair! Okay look, I have an idea. Why dont we, why dont we see what kind of number he has on his speed dial, and then from that we can tell who has more in common with him. And then whoever does gets the phone.
Rachel: I dont think so.
Phoebe: (handing Rachel the phone) Fine all right, but Id bet youd be singing another tune if we were fighting over a ratchet.
Rachel: (checking the speed dial) All right, first name on the speed dial is mom.
Rachel: Okay no way, you cannot use that to get the cute guy and the last blueberry muffin.
Rachel: Yes okay. (Checking the speed dial again.) Well now see this isnt telling us anything. (Reading the speed dial) Joe. Carlos. Peter. Ooh! Peter Luger! T hats a steak house!
Rachel: (looking at the speed dial) Oh, I win! Hes got Barneys on his speed dial.
Rachel: (showing Phoebe her phone) His new girlfriend!
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment, Phoebe is putting out some Sunflower seeds as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Hi Pheebs!
Rachel: How are ya?
Rachel: Umm Pheebs, remember when we were in the coffee house we decided that I was going to keep the uh, the cute guys cell phone?
Rachel: And remember how I said I was going to keep it in my purse so that if it rang I could just pick it up?
Rachel: And do you remember going into my purse and stealing the phone?!
Rachel: You stole the phone!
Rachel: No? So youre saying that if I called it, it wouldnt ring?
Rachel: Umm, okay. But while you dial, let me show you the features of my new ringing handbag. (Rachel dials her phone and Phoebes bag starts to ring.) Oh, it does work! (Rachel grabs the phone and takes it out of Phoebes handbag.)
Rachel: Phoebe!
Rachel: Oh is it?! (She answers the cute guys phone.) Uhh, hello? (On her phone) Yes hi, is Rachel there? (On the other phone) Yes she is, just one moment please. (To Phoebe, holding out both phones.) Its for me!
Rachel: Oh my God! I bet thats him. My digital fairy tale is about to begin. I wonder how I should be? Should I be uh (In a sexy voice) Hello? Or should I be (Happily) Hi! Its Rach (Phoebe knocks the phone out of Rachels hand, catches it, and answers it.) Would you stop doing that?!
Rachel: Phoebe! You cant do th
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Shhh! Im on a call! (On phone) Umm well yeah, you can pick it up tonight, say 8:30? At-at my apartment. Its umm, its umm 5 Morton Street, Apartment 14, umm and then maybe yknow after we can grab a bite to eat or whatever. (Listens) Okay, well okay Ill see you then. (Listens) Bye. (Hangs up.)
Rachel: You do know that I will be here when he comes over.
Rachel: You just said it!
Rachel: Oh Phoebe!
Rachel: Ohh! (Exits.)
[Scene: Phoebe's apartment, Phoebe and Rachel are waiting for the cute guy to show up for his cell phone. Rachel is putting on perfume by spraying it ahead of her face, and moving into it. Phoebe tries to steal some.]
Rachel: Hey! Hey!
Phoebe and Rachel: (simultaneously) Who is it?
(Rachel excitedly jumps up and heads for the door.)
Rachel: Well why shouldnt I?!
Rachel: Well, then I get to give him the cell phone.
Phoebe: (To Rachel) Wow! How long were we arguing for?
Rachel: (laughs) Youre not the man who left the cell phone.
Rachel: Is-is he coming? (Looks hopefully out the door.)
Rachel: Well be right back sir.
Rachel: I dont know!
Phoebe: Can you believe this? (Rachel exhales in amazement.) We were waiting for a hot guy and then an even hotter one shows up!
Rachel: I know! (Realizes what Phoebe said.) What?!
Rachel: (turning and looking at Tom again) No-no they do but, you just have to wait.
Phoebe: Rachel, listenI mean, if you let me have him then I will really owe you one.
Rachel: (fake disappointment) All right. All right Phoebe I will let you have him, but you owe me; you owe me big!
Rachel: Ohh
(She laughs as Rachel enters.)
Rachel: Hi.
(Rachel stops dead in her tracks when she sees whom Joey is with.)
Rachel: Oh my God! Oh my God!! Ohh, Jessica Lockhart!! In my apartment!! I am such a huge fan! I am such a huge fan!
Rachel: (screaming) MONICA!!!! MONICA!!!! (Runs to Monicas.)
Joey: That uh, that is my roommate Rachel.
Monica: (entering with Rachel) Oh my God! Its true!! Oh my God you are so amazing! Oh my God, can I just ask you to do me oh, just one favor?
Rachel: God. You seem really, really nice.
Rachel: I mean n-not-not fake at all like most famous people.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: You are so beautiful.
Joey: (notices something in the mail that Rachel brought in) Oh my God!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica have gathered to hear Ross perform his interpretation of Celebration by Cool and the Gang on the bag pipe.]
Rachel: (giggles) (To Ross) I can imagine you in a short plaid skirt and knee socks.
Ross: (To Rachel) Do you wanna start telling secrets?
Rachel: No!
(As he prepares to start, he makes several horrible noises that scares Rachel into retreat.)
(Ross resumes playing, this time accompanied by Phoebe screeching out Es in tune with Ross. While Phoebe is singing along, Rachel is having a very difficult time keeping a straight face. Thankfully, Ross gives up after a little while.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica have gathered to hear Ross perform his interpretation of Celebration by Cool and the Gang on the bag pipe. Yes, I typed that earlier. Were seeing this again, only this time Ross as already started playing.]
Rachel: You can?
Rachel: Um-hmm.
Rachel: Okay.
(They grab the luggage and drag it into Joey and Rachels forcing Monica and Chandler to follow.)
Rachel: (depressed) Hi.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: All right.
Rachel: Okay.
(Enter Rachel and Paolo. They are both somewhat flustered)
Rachel: Ow!
[Scene: A couch store, Ross is trying to decide on a new couch for his place. He has dragged Rachel along for the trip, and she's not too happy about it. Ross is sitting on it in different ways to see how it feels. He tries to just sit on it normally, and then he tries flopping on it. One thing about this couch, it's huge. It's like twice the size of a normal full size couch. Whoever designed this thing, needs help and fast.]
RACHEL: OK, OK, that is my favorite sweater, that is my third date sweater.
Rachel: Oh, Ive got big Valentines plans! Ive got my Chinese food on the way, and the rest of your saltwater taffy!
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Rachel, Chandler, and Phoebe are there.]
Rachel: Yes, you didOh my God you didnt! (Screams) Well then why didnt you tell me that before?!
Rachel: Pheebs?
RACHEL: What'cha gonna' do?
Phoebe: IRachel, you cant go! Ross loves Emily!
Phoebe: Alrighty, here come the water works. (Rachel starts crying harder.)
Rachel: OhhDo you think he will?!
Rachel: Okay. (picks up phone) Are you sure you wanna hear this?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Continued from earlier, Rachel is now telling everyone of her experience in the garbage room.]
Monica: Ross and Rachel don't know what they're talking about. I mean its not like their so responsible. Emma is a product of a bottle of Merlot and a five year old condom.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is entering, Monica and Rachel are talking on the couch.]
Rachel: Well, now, wait. Now Im all freaked out. Come on, you guys will watch it with me.
Rachel: Well, hon-ey. I'm just trying to look nice for your big night.
Rachel: Excuse me, Dr. Bobby happens to be an excellent doctor.
(Rachel comes out of her room, suddenly she remembers leaving the message.)
Rachel: Ohh, thank you, thank you, thank you.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel folding and packing clothes in suitcases as Phoebe enters.]
Rachel: Bye. (She gets up to leave but is stopped by Joey)
Ross: I'm sorry, Rachel, this is Charlie Wealer, she's a collegue.
Mr. Zelner: Hello Rachel, you uh, got a minute?
Rachel: Whoops. (Starts to go into Chandler and Joeys.) Oh, hey, do you need help with that?
Rachel: Not working with me, Joe! Here's the thing: lately I have been having thoughts (pauses) musings, if you will!
Rachel: Phoebe, we cant, we just cant just let it happen! Okay, we have to do something! We have to break them up! Okay? Just go in there and like, shave her head! You owe me one bald girl!!
[Rachel, seeing what he did for her, gets up, walks across the room, and kisses Ross]
Rachel: Look, If I dont get to London!! He is going to marry that other girl!!!
RACHEL: Well, how did you find out?
Rachel: Yeah?
Rachel: Anyway, theres this big charity ball this weekend and Ralph Lauren bought a table, so I kinda have to go
Phoebe: (raises hand) Oh! I know! (Rachel startled) It's because... he's gorgeous, and he's charming, and when he looks at you...
Rachel: You guys, come on, it doesn't matter why we're late. We're all here now, please let us in so we can have some of your delicious turkey. (A slice of turkey on a piece of aluminum foil is slid under door)
Rachel: (taking a bite) Hmmm!
Rachel: Oh, I found him. He was Paolo's cat.
RACHEL: Ya know, in crazy world, that means you're married.
Rachel: But he has to know how I feel!
Transcribers Note: This is stuff we never saw from all of the seasons, so for all of the scene settings I will be using the current arrangements. Even though some of the out takes take place when Chandler was living with Joey and Rachel was living with Monica, when Joey and Chandler were living in Monica and Rachels, and the current arrangements.
Big Nosed Rachel: Oh! No, not really.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel and Fake Monica are there.]
Rachel: What? Uhh, Phoebe, honey, honey, I know you're quirky and I get a big kick out of it, we all do actually, but if you destroy a coat like this that is like a crime against nature! Not nature, fashion!
Rachel: Ill figure something out.
Rachel: (to the closed door) Hang in there. You hang in there. (Gives him the raspberry.)
Phoebe: Did you stop Rachel?
Rachel: Oh Ross, you're so great. [she playfully rubs his head and gets up]
Rachel: Yeah, because I was mad at you, not because I stopped loving you!
[Scene: The street in front of Central Perk, Ross is walking up and sees two women that look like Phoebe and Rachel from behind.]
RACHEL: Okay, now that is the third time someone has said something like that to me today.
MR. GREENE: I'll never remember all of that. So uh, what's the deal? Rachel comes home, people pop out and yell stuff, is that it?
Ross: No, it's not a divorce, it is not a divorce! Anyway, I think Rachel and I need to, you know, get on with our lives, maybe, maybe start seeing other people.
Rachel: Well, are we all together? Like in a group?
Big Nosed Rachel: Happy Thanksgiving!
[Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel laugh]
Chandler: (To Rachel) Sounds like a fun party.
Joey: Half hour. (Rachel turns to look at him and he nods yes.)
Rachel: Okay, you are going to tell her and youre going to tell her now. (She grabs his nipple and starts to twist it.)
(Rachel feeds something to Paolo. He eats it and licks her hand)
Rachel: Oh my God! We are throwing the most depressing baby shower ever!
Rachel: Monica, what should I do?
Rachel: What?
Rachel: Youre bachelor pad?!
(Monica comes out of the bathroom like a bolt, and Rachel and Joey both enter.)
Rachel: Oh, hi!
(Cut to Rachel and Ross.)
Rachel: Right
Rachel: Hi! All right, lets go shoppin!!
Rachel: Ross honey, this is very nice, but, but I-I got a crisis.
Monica: Oh my God, Rachel! Hi!
Rachel: Ross said my name. Okay? My name. Ross said my name up there that obviously means that he still loves me! (They both just stare at her.) Okay, dont believe me, I know Im rightdo you guys want to go downstairs and get a drink?
Chandler: Oh, hello Rachel.
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Well, look at that, same thing.
Rachel: Hello? Oh, Pheebs! (To them) Its Phoebe!
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Well, Ross said my name.
Monica: Oh, what a great argument, exhaling! All right, y'know what, Ill prove it to you, okay. Ill trade you Joey for Rachel, and Ill still win the game.
Rachel: Oh Im sorry mummys so sorry go back to sleep go back to sleep. Shh. Shhh! Go back to sleep
Rachel: Oh, Chandler!! All right, this is it! (Grabs the key) You never see Joanna again!
(Rachel looks at it and then throws it away. She then removes a fourth one, revealing a third hole.)
(He gets up and walks away as Rachel come running over all excited.)
[Cut to Monica and Rachels, theyre all there playing cards.]
Rachel: (she stops and turns) Hi!
Rachel: No well, no it's not that bad, y'know? I mean yeah, my tongue feels a little fuzzy and these fingers sort of smell, I actually feel like I can throw up.
Rachel: Yeah. Im sorry.
Rachel: I uh, I have two tickets to the Knicks game tonight if youre interested, just as a thank you for this week.
Rachel: No, youre not an idiot, Ross. Youre a guy very much in love.
Rachel: So umm, what time are you supposed to leave?
Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: Right!
Rachel: Good!