words in movies
(Rachel enters)
Monica: Hey, Rach! I made a pile of your stuff over on this side of the room. If you could just (Rachel grunts and throws her purse at it) throw your purses at it.
Rachel: Bloomingdales eliminated my department. (Phoebe gasps)
Rachel: No, but they stuck me in personal shopping. Which is just a huge step down!
Rachel: Uh-huh.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, the gang minus Monica and Rachel are eating breakfast. Ross and Chandler are sitting at the foosball table and eating.]
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachels new job.]
Rachel: (on the phone) Monica, Im quitting! I just helped an 81 year old woman put on a thong and she didnt even buy it! (Pause) Im telling you Im quitting! Thats it! Im talking to my boss right now! (Pause) Yes I am! (Pause) Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Okay bye, call me when you get this message. (Hangs up as her boss, Mr. Waltham, walks in.) Oh! Mr. Waltham, I ah really need to talk to you.
(Its a really good-looking man, Joshua, that Rachel has an instant crush on. Well actually its Tate Donovan, so its not like shes really testing her acting skills.)
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: Hi, Im Rachel Green. What can I do for you Joshua?
Rachel: Oh, Im so sorry.
(He walks over to look and some clothes and Rachel quickly turns around and adjusts her bra, trying to show off her assets.)
Rachel: Well, at least thats a great suit.
Joshua: Yeah, but it wasnt much fun dropping it off at the dry cleaners in the skirt. (Rachel laughs) So I need everything down to underwear, so if youre willing, Im all yours.
Rachel: Okay.
Mr. Waltham: Rachel, you needed to speak to me?
Rachel: No-no, that wasnt me! (To Joshua) Well, we should get started. Let me show you my underwear. (Joshua turns at that) The selection of underwear we carry.
(He walks out and Rachel stares at his butt as he leaves. He makes a wrong turn.)
Rachel: Oh-oh, sorry, its this way, its this way. (Motions to the correct way.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey, Phoebe, and Ross are there eating pizza as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: I have the best job in the entire world! The most adorable guy came over today, and I got to dress him up all day!
Phoebe: Rachel has a new doll.
Rachel: Oh, I wish he was a doll, then I could get a Rachel doll and bump them together and make kissy noises. Oh! And he has the most beautiful name, I never realised it, Joshua! Josh-u-a! Joshua! Josh.
Rachel: Hi-e!!
(Rachel laughs hysterically for no reason.)
Rachel: Well, it was just something Josh said about v-necks, but you had to be there.
Rachel: Its Joshua.
Rachel: Why? Honey, what is the big deal?
Rachel: Yeah, thats true.
Rachel: Chandler, what did she say?
Rachel: Beefsteak Charlies?
[Scene: The hallway between the apartments, Monica is lugging one of those floor polishing machines through the hallway. Rachel comes up the steps and stops when she sees Monica.]
Rachel: Whoops. (Starts to go into Chandler and Joeys.) Oh, hey, do you need help with that?
Rachel: Ooh, I just feel bad, I never vacuum. (She goes into Chandler and Joeys.)
Rachel: Hi!
Rachel: So I was with Joshua for an hour today, and he has not asked me out. Its just so frustrating!
Rachel: Really? It doesnt seem desperate?
Rachel: Hmm-mmm.
Rachel: Yeah but, Ive never asked a guy out before.
Rachel: No. Have you?
Rachel: I dont even know how I would go about it.
Rachel: You know what, Im gonna do that, Im gonna call him up, and Im gonna ask him out. I can do that. Ask him out. (Practising) How you doin? (Calls him) Hi! Joshua? Its Rachel Green from Bloomingdales. (Listens) Yeah, umm, I was wondering if you umm, if you umm, left your wallet at the store today? Well, we found a wallet, and we(Listens) the license? Well, that is a good idea! Uh, well, lets see here this says this license belongs to a uh, uh, belongs to a mister uh, Pheebs, and umm, yeah, so sorry to bother you at home. Ill see you tomorrow. Bye. (Hangs up) (to Phoebe) Youve done that a thousand times?
Rachel: Ohh, God, I just got so nervous that he would say no.
Rachel: Really?! You think that will work?
(We hear a noise coming from Monica and Rachels apartment.)
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachels new job, she is waiting for Joshua and practising how to ask him out.]
Rachel: Would you like to go to a basketball game with me? (Tries again.) You know, its funny, basketball, because I happen to have tickets too (Tries again.) Umm, who likes the Knicks(Joshua comes in from the dressing room.)
Rachel: Oh! Well, as a single woman, who is available, I think you look great!
Rachel: Yep. Oh, yeah, look you great. (She puts her arm in his and checks how they would look as a couple.) Oh yeah. Yeah, this looks great. (Pause) Umm, so you like it?
Rachel: Great.
Rachel: Sure.
Rachel: Yeah-eah-ha!
Rachel: Oh well, you dont want to do that now?!
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Basketball!
Rachel: I uh, I have two tickets to the Knicks game tonight if youre interested, just as a thank you for this week.
Rachel: Really?
Joshua: Yeah, that would be fantastic! My-my nephew is crazy about the Knicks! This is fantastic, thank you so much Rachel. (He takes the tickets and leaves as Mr. Waltham returns.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, erm, Chandler and Joey's, Joey is debriefing Rachel on her rejection earlier that day and telling her what she shouldve done. Ross and Phoebe are watching.]
Rachel: I have an extra ticket. An extra ticket. Not, two tickets, I have an extra ticket.
Rachel: He didnt turn me down! Hes at the game isnt he? I got the date, Im just not on it!
Rachel: Wow! Monica!
Rachel: Honey, this is not your fault, just because you guys had a fight, it does not justify her sleeping with someone.
[Scene: Bloomingdales, Rachel is sitting at her desk as Mr. Waltham comes in.]
Mr. Waltham: Rachel, one of your customers seems to have left his billfold. A Joshua Bergen.
Rachel: Really?
Rachel: Yes! I will! Absolutely! (She takes out his license and her license and holds them face to face with each other. She then proceeds to act like Dark Helmut in Spaceballs, and mimic a conversation between the two of them.) Hello, Rachel. Hi, Joshua. I left my wallet here on purpose. Really? Yes, I just wanted to see you again. Oh, Im glad. Rachel, Id like to say something to you. Yes? How you doin?
Monica: (as Rachel) (Suddenly laughing) Oh, god, I am so spoiled... That's it!
Rachel: Oh! That's great!
Rachel: So hi!
Rachel: So you eh, you talked to Joey?
Rachel: Really? Excited?
(Ross walks to the back of the plane, where Rachel is.)
Rachel: Ah... Well, obviously I think so too.
Joey: (sees Rachel) Oh, uh, hey Rach. I uh, I was just coming over here to uh Oh wait, I dont have to lie to you, you dont live here anymore. Uh, Im eating their food. What are you doing?
(Chandler looks dejected. Rachel picks up another gift.)
Rachel: Okay, uhm... alright, here's the deal.
Rachel: What? What is it?
Rachel: Well, yeah... Okay, look it's about me and...
[Scene: In the store. Rachel and Phoebe returning from the changing rooms]
Rachel: Because you took three hundred bottles of shampoo?
Rachel: Uh, look Ross, this really isn't easy.
Rachel: Wow! Well, clearly this is not a good time.
(Rachel runs up cluching an envelope.)
Rachel: Hi!
[Scene: Rachel and Joey's apartment. Joey enters.]
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Oh, Joey, I have such a problem!
Rachel: Yeah, 'cause that's what we do.
Rachel: Seriously, good night!
Rachel: Shhh.
Rachel: We weren't doing anything!
Rachel: Oh, thank God I can't hear a word that you're saying!
Rachel: We feel so terrible about this, Ross.
Joey and Rachel: Yeah.
Rachel: No, no, no!
(Rachel looks at him.)
Rachel: Ross, say something. Anything.
Rachel: No, but you know what I mean.
Rachel: Can I ask you a question?
Rachel: Calm ourselves?
Rachel: (now looking up at the ceiling) That is hard to say, Ross. That is hard to say.
Rachel: Well, what would we be doing?
Rachel: Feel me up?
Rachel: Hey.
Rachel: Oh, you bet.
Rachel: Okay, well, we brought you some wine.
Rachel: Okay! (Picks up the phone and starts dialing.) (In an Irish accent) "Hello Ross, this is Dr. McNeeley from the Fake Accent University, wed like you to come on board with us full time! (Hangs up.)
Rachel: Well, maybe the next batch, we could all get some.
Rachel: No awareness.
Monica: Go! I have it in my book. Go! (Rachel leaves and Monica calls Mrs. Green.) (To Phoebe) Wait a minute! If youre in charge of the invitations why am I the one who has to call herHello Mrs. Green! Hi, its Monica Geller.
Rachel: Yeah, you started it! I've got to chill.
Rachel: (speaking to herself and reading Cosmopolitan) Oh, lucky me! Coffee and a live sex show!
Rachel: O-kay!! See what you did, Im gonna be doing it by myself now. Okay?
Rachel: (entering from her bedroom) Well, I just called Joshua
RACHEL: I didn't know you guys hung out.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's erm, Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is on her dinner date with Joshua.]
Rachel: Monica, last Saturday night, what happened on Walker: Texas Ranger?
Rachel: Ooy.
Rachel: (entering, with a guy) Hi guys! This is Josh. Josh, these are my friends, and that's Ross.
Rachel: Ross, you don't seem okay.
Rachel: Oh my god, are we supposed to answer?
Phoebe: Oh my god, Rachel asked me if I knew anyone for her too.
Rachel: No, no, it's just that it's getting late...
Charlie: God, Rachel, what Ross just said that is just so..
Ross: Wasn't it? And you thought it would be awkward with Joey and that you never really liked Rachel.
Rachel: You know what, Ross? I think we're gonna take off too.
[Scene: Rachel's hotel room. Joey is standing at the door, facing Rachel]
Chandler: So, you and Rachel tonight, huh?
Rachel: I don't really care about the Knicks.
Rachel: No! None! I mean, my first night in the city, he mentioned something about asking me out, but nothing ever happened, so I just... (to Joey): W-well, what else did he say? I mean, does he, like, want to go out with me?
Rachel: Uh-oh.
Rachel: (To Joey) Yeah I knowIm goodI got it! (Joey slowly backs away.) (To the boy) Now wait a minute, Ive got one more thing I have to say to you oh right! Shut up!
Joey: (smiles then stops) Now I cant believe it! What? Rachels pregnant? (The girls nod yes.) Whos the father?
Phoebe: Rachel? Patrick is really rich. (To Patrick) Give her some money.
Rachel: Ross, she still has not noticed that the baby�s sock is on the ground.
[Scene: Joey’s apartment. Joey and Rachel enter the room]
Rachel: So.
Rachel: Ok, so sorry.
Joey and Rachel: Okay
(Joey and Rachel start kissing)
RACHEL: Maybe it, maybe it doesn't have to be this tough. I mean, maybe you were on the right track with this whole, you know, spontaneous thing. I mean, women really like that.
Rachel: Oh, wait before you guys go, can I just ask you a question?
Rachel and Joey: Okay.
Rachel: Ow!
Rachel: Oh!
Rachel: Okay.
Rachel: Well this is romantic!
Rachel: Ok well, well I'm really, I'm sorry about that Joey, but do you think that maybe on some level, you don't want to take off my bra?
Phoebe: (to Rachel) Ok, I just wanna be really sure this time. Andie McDowell's the girl from Four Weddings and a Funeral, right?
Rachel: Joey! (she walks away; Joey goes after her teasing and tickling her)
Rachel: (laughing) oooh! Oh oh!
Rachel: Ok, careful, ok. (Emma giggles) Oh, she’s smiling! Oh my God, she does like it!
Rachel: Ok professor or detective?
Joey: (To Rachel) Hey!
Rachel: Hey! Got champagne?
Rachel: Yeah baby, I'll show you how we do it!
Rachel: I just had a rough night.
Rachel: Ill be right there! (to Ross) Okay, Ross, please come on! I thought we have moved on! I thought weve gotten to a place where we could be happy for each other! I mean was that just me?
Rachel: What is the matter with us?
Ross: Rachel! Well, you-youre not at home, youre-youre-youre right here.
Rachel: Yeah I know. She ran into him at my office and they just made out. And the craziest thing is, now my boss likes me because I told her about it and she said it was the best gossip shed heard all year.
(Rachel and Joey are still looking at Chandler, slowly letting his words get to them)
Rachel: Right, totally.
Rachel: Yeah, and if doesn't work, then we'll be just one of those couples that never have sex.
Rachel: Okay, Pheebs, yknow what, lets look at this objectively all right? Ninth grade, right? The obsession starts. All right? The summer after ninth grade he sees me in a two-piece for the first time, his obsession begins to grow. So then
Rachel: Yeah.