words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Chandler are entering, Joey is on the phone.]
Joey: (hanging up the phone) Yes! Guess who's in an audition for a Broadway musical?
Rachel: Oh!! I love this job! (her phone rings) Wow! My first call.
Mark: Here, let me. (answers phone) Rachel Green's line, how may I help you?
Ross: (on phone) Hi, is Rachel there?
Ross: Hi! What's ah, what's Mark doing answering your phone?
(phone rings)
Chandler: All right, I have to get that, but no-no. (answering phone) Hello? (listens) (happily) Hi! Yeah listen, I'm, I'm in need of a stripper and I was told that you do that. (listens) Let me ask you this, what, what do you do for the extra hundred? (listens) So would I, would I have to provide the grapes?
Monica: Joey, put that down! (the phone rings) Oh my God! It's Pete. Okay, get out!! How the hell do you answer a video-phone! (steps in front of it, and automatically answers it)
Ross: Just some boys gave me their phone numbers.
(phone rings)
Rachel: (into the phone) No, there isn't time to go to the bakery. We're just gonna come home... Everybody left? Alright, well just tell Emma we're gonna be there as soon as we can. (emotionally) Bye...
(Her cell phone rings.)
[Scene: Joey's apartment. Joey is sitting on his bed and the phone rings]
[Cut to Rosss apartment, hes watching TV and eating some popcorn as the phone rings.]
[Scene: Mike's apartment. Phoebe's there and the phone rings.]
Ross: Hey, you gotta get Mom on the phone. Call Mom! Call Mom!
(Phoebe tries to give her phone to Ross, but he won't take it. He mouths "no.")
Rachel: Okay! (Picks up the phone and starts dialing.) (In an Irish accent) "Hello Ross, this is Dr. McNeeley from the Fake Accent University, wed like you to come on board with us full time! (Hangs up.)
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is sitting at the kitchen table staring at the phone as Monica enters.]
(The machine picks up the phone)
[Scene: Monica’s apartment. Monica and Phoebe are reading magazines when the phone rings and Phoebe reaches to pick it up]
Ross: Im sorry. But ah, hey, oh, somebodys off the phone, how bout a glass of wine by the fire, I could get it going again.
[Scene: Mike's apartment. His phone rings and he picks up]
JOEY: Hey.� How come you're answering your own phone?� Where's your crazy assistant?
CHANDLER: Ok, while Ross is on the phone, everybody owes me 62 bucks for his birthday.
(phone starts ringing and Chandler comes running out of the bathroom)
(The phone rings, Ross picks up)
(The phone rings, Joey picks up)
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe and Joey are there. Phoebe's cell phone rings.]
(She hangs up the phone and starts to head back to the kitchen and notices some money lying out, stops, reaches down to pick it up, the phone rings causing her to drop it, she quickly puts it back, and heads for the kitchen.)
Chandler: Oh come on guys, its not like I moved to Europe! I just moved across the hall! And we would have you over all the time if it werent for (struggles to get this out) Monicas allergies. (The duck quacks.) Youre right, I could never lie to you. She hates you. (The phone rings.) Should I get that? (Laughs, then answers the phone.) Hello? (Listens) Uh no, Joeys not here right now. Can I take a message? (Listens) Yeah, okay so the audition has been moved from 5:00 to 2:30? (Listens) Okay great. (Listens.) Bye. (Hangs up the phone and goes to write the message on the Magna-Doodle on the door but Monica walks in and forces him to jump out of the way.)
Rachel: (Takes the phone) Oh! That's interesting, since she died seven years ago!!
Rachel: (On the phone) Excuse me? Oh yeah? Well, up yours too! (Hangs up)
Stranger: And it is annoying when parents put their baby on the phone...
Joey: Yeah. Yeah, so what? (On phone) Look, I live across the street, (walking to the window) and I know all about you and your little telescope, and I don't appreciate it, okay? (Listens) Yeah, I can see you right now! (Listens) Hello! (Listens) If I wanna walk around my apartment in my underwear, I shouldn't have to feel like(Listens)Thank you, but... that's not really the point... (Listens) The point is that... (Listens) Mostly free weights, but occasionally..
Chandler: Okay, I'm gonna go to the bathroom. Will you watch my phone?
(Ross sadly hangs up the phone, while Phoebe looks at him. Cut to Rachel at the gate. She gives her boarding pass to the gate attendant, and she goes onboard. The gate attendant closes the door and locks it.)
Monica: Maybe we could call the phone company. Maybe they could change the message. Maybe they can change his number.
PHOEBE: (calling from the bar on her cell phone.) Hey, Mike, it's me.� Listen, is um, is Ross near you?
Chandler: (picking up the phone) Hello.
[Scene: Mike's place. Phoebe is on the phone.]
(The phone rings in Chandler and Monica's apartment)
Monica: (on phone, faking she's sick) I-I'm not gonna be able to make it into work today, I don't feel very good. (Joey makes a high throw and Monica has to catch it way over her head.) (Not sounding sick) Yes!! (Realizes what she just did.) (Sounding sick again) Wow! Uh, for a second there I thought I was really better, but I'm not. (Hangs up and keeps throwing the ball.)
Phoebe: (entering and talking on mobile phone) Ok, great! All right, bye! (she hangs up) Pain in the ass!! (she looks at the others, then back at the phone) That's off, right?
(The phone rings and Chandler goes to get it)
Rachel: (panics, turns around, picks up the phone, and pretend to talk on it) Hello?! (Listens) Oh, yeah! (To Tag) This is gonna be a while. Excuse me. (Tag leaves and she closes the door behind him, disgustedly.) Yeah!
(She hangs up, closes her phone, turns around and puts it in her bag which is in the back of the car. While doing this and not looking at the road, she turns the steering wheel by accident, which makes the car swerve.)
Rachel: "Im Monica, I dont get phone messages from interesting people. Ever!"
(Cut to Phoebe who is in the living room, still on the phone.)
Chandler: This coming from the man who couldnt split our 80 dollar phone bill in half.
Joey: (entering, depressed) Hey. I just got off the phone with Estelle and guess what. (Pause, then very excitedly) I GOT THE LEAD IN A MOVIE!!!!!!
Chandler: (on phone) Laundry. Huh. Is that my new nickname? (Rachel is absolutely stunned, she opens her mouth in absolute amazement.)
Ross: (on the phone) No-no-no, it's just a bit sudden. (Listens) No, it's great. Okay? I'm totally on board. I love you too, all righty. Bye. (Hangs up.)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's. Joey's on the phone.]
Mike: I'm not blowing her off, I actually just got off the phone with her, were going out tomorrow night, I mean I hope that's ok with you stranger from the coffee house.
Amy: (To Rachel) Nana is on the phone (Hands the phone over to Rachel)
Mischa: (to Monica) And the vet said it was time. And so from half a world away, while my Mother held the phone to his ear, I said good bye to my dog,. In seven languages.
Monica: (answers the phone) Hello? (Listens.) (To Phoebe) It's Joey. (Phoebe's proud of herself.) (To Joey) I'm so glad you called! Chandler told me what happened. Y'know he's really upset about it.
(Rachel looks shocked, gets over it, notices she's alone, and picks up the phone. The last part of which is something she shouldn't have done, because the phone is already in use. By Monica, and now Rachel can hear every word.)
Ross: Alright, you madcap gal. Try to imagine this. The phone bill arrives, but you don't pay it right away.
(She holds down the phone to the twins again.)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, the next morning. Chandler is sitting and staring at his phone. Monica enters and creeps up next to Chandler.]
(She holds the phone down to the twins.)
Ross: I am not doing this over the phone.
Michelle: No, wait, you don�t have my phone number!
Ross: (on the phone) No Mum, I'm not dead. I know it's not something to kid about. It was just a practical joke between Chandler and me, but it's over, ok? (pause) Actually no, even if I had died, you would not be left childless. (pause) Monica?
Chandler: Wait a minute, hold the phone! Youre not talking about Chuckles University?!
Monica: What about all the guys that you've got the phone numbers from? Why don't you just kiss one of them?
[Scene: The rest stop, Phoebe is on the phone to the motor club.]
Rachel: Well, I wouldn't know because I got so freaked out that I hung up the phone.
Rachel: I dont know Tag! How can your genitals make phone calls? Okay? Its not a perfect world! Just go please.
Ross: (on phone) Ok, bye. (hangs up) Well, Monica's not coming, it's just gonna be me and Rachel.
(She exits and as Chandler picks up his coat, the phone rings and the answering machine gets it.)
Dr. Green: (on phone) just because youre not in love with the guy you cant
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are still arguing over the phone.]
Rachel: (on phone) Daddy... Daddy... Daddy, why whyyy would I sleep with Billy Dreskin? His father tried to put you out of business! (Rachel turns to Monica, clasping the receiver to her bosom so Dr.Green can't hear, while mouthing "You are...") ...dead!
Rachel: Okay! (She picks up the phone, Joeys phone number, and starts to dial.) Here we go! Okay! (On phone.) Hi, Joey! Its Rachel! Umm, I am free tomorrow night. Yeah, sure, sure I can bring some sandwiches.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, Ross is ordering something over the phone from a catalog.]
PHOEBE: Well, you kind of just did.� That guy is going to call you tonight.� Ross is going to pick up the phone and that's a pretty clear message.
Earl: Oh yeah? I work in a cubicle surrounded by people. Ive been talking to you for five minutes now about killing myself and no ones even looked up from their desk. Hang-hang on. (To the people standing around his cubicle.) Hey everybody! Uh, Im gonna kill myself! (Theres no response; no one even looks up.) Ill get back to ya. (To Phoebe) I got nothing. Wait. (He sets the phone down.) Uh, hey Marge! (Mimes putting a gun to his head, pulling the trigger, and splattering his brain on the wall behind him. Then points to himself. Marge watches this, then goes back to work.) (To Phoebe) Ehh, nothing. Nothing.
Rachel: This is a very critical time right now. If you feel yourself reaching for that phone, then you go shoe shopping, you get your butt in a bubble bath. You want her back you have to start acting aloof.
(Monica sees a woman pass by with a baby, puts the phone to her chest, and starts to cry. Chandler takes the phone, makes a noise in it resembling static, and hangs up. Joey enters.)
Chandler: (on phone, reading from a script) Oh, Danielle! I wasn't expecting the machine... Give me a call when you get a chance. (Rattles some dishes) Bye-bye. (Hangs up.) Oh God!
Chandler: Oh, that's ok.I'll just try and reschedule. (on the phone) "Hi, this is Chandler Bing. I made a reservation there and I need to change it (pause) Oh, what do you mean it's not refundable? Can I just come some other time? (pause) Oh, can't you make an exception?"
ESTL: Oh, I see. Well, I'm just gonna put in a call here and we'll find out what's goin' on and straighten it out. [picks up the phone] Yeah, hi, Lori please. [pause] Hi darling. So how 'bout Joey Tribbiani for the part of the cab driver, isn't he terrific? [pause] Uh-huuuuh. [pause] Uh-huuuuh. OK, doll. Talk to you later. [hangs up] [to Joey] Yeah, you're gonna have to sleep with her.
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Phoebe is on the phone and Monica is nonchalantly "minding her own business".]
[Scene: Phoebe Sr. house, she is a real estate agent and is trying to sell a house over the phone. By the way, its still raining outside.]
Rachel: Every time? (She takes up her cell phone and starts dialing.)
Joey: (takes phone) Hi, yeah, it's me. (Listens) Oh, no no no, we're just friends. (Listens) Yeah, I'm single. (Listens) 25. (Listens) An actor. (Listens) Hello?
Chandler: No, she's not okay? And I'll prove it to you. I'm gonna call her right now. (Picks up the phone and wipes it off) Phone's done ehh.
Rachel: (Into the phone) Hello? (announces to Amy) Oh, it's our nanny! (goes back to the phone conversation) Hi! Oh... God! I hope you feel better! Ok, bye! (Hangs up) (To Ross) That's Molly, she's sick. Can you watch Emma today?
Ross: (on phone) Yeah, you want 55-JUMBO. Yeah, that's right. That's right, JUMBO with a U, sir. (pause) No, belive me, you don't want me. Judging by his number, I'd be a huge disappointment. (pause) All rightie, bye bye.
Monica: (on phone) I can't wait to be with you! I'll just tell Rachel I'm gonna be doing laundry for a couple of hours.
(The phone rings and Monica answers it.)
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. They are sitting in their living room when the phone rings.]
Rachel: I know you did. I'm just gonna deal with it, I'm just gonna deal with it. (Ross comes by, smoching with Julie on the phone.) I gotta get out of here. (Exits)
(Amy walks in carrying a phone handset)
Rachel: (on phone) Ross, hi, it's Rachel. I'm just calling to say that um, everything's fine and I'm really happy for you and your cat...(cut)...I am over you. I am over you and that, my friend, is what they call closure. (She hangs up and tosses phone in the ice bucket.)
Ross: (on phone) Item J437-A, color: winterberry. (Theres a knock on the door as he hangs up the phone. He answers it to Mona.) Hi umm, listen come here, come in. (She does so.) Im so-so sorry about yesterday. I-Im really sorry. Its just that I (He picks up the pink shirt.)
Rachel: Thank you. (He leaves and she proceeds to plant the folder in his bottom drawer. She then picks up the phone and holds it to her breasts.) Hello? (Hangs up the phone.) I still dont get it.
[Scene: Chandler's office. He's on the phone, agitated.]
Joey: I may have to, I hate to do it, but Im the star! Yknow? Theres a limit to how many sandwiches I can eat off the floor. (His cell phone rings) Excuse me. (Answers it, on phone) Joey Tribbiani.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is coming back from using the phone.]
Monica: (pauses then on the phone) Uh- Rachel has left the building, can you call back?
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler is entering to find Joey, still looking like Captain Stubing, on the phone.]
Tag: And I never used to be able to just talk to girls in bars, but I got like 20 phone numbers last night.
Monica: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) (To All) Its the deli again!