words in movies
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Phoebe enters with a paper turkey.]
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Wow, that sounds great! And what are you making Monica, in case Rachels dessert is...[about to say bad] so good that I eat all of it. Theres none left for anybody else!
[Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel laugh]
Phoebe: And who else is going to be there?
Phoebe: Yeah, and-and leaving us to go see hot dancer girls is not very Thanksgivingy.
[Time lapse. The gang is sitting down for Thanksgiving dinner. Chandler is at the head of the table, Mr and Mrs Geller are to his right. Joey and Ross are to his left. Monica is serving things. Phoebe is in the living room and Rachel is at the sink.]
[Phoebe walks from the living room to the kitchen and talks quietly to Rachel.]
Phoebe: Rach, Rach, I just remembered. I had a dream about Mr. Geller last night.
Phoebe: Yeah, I dreamt that he saved me from a burning building and he was so brave and so strong! And its making me look at him totally differently. Yknow, I mean he used to be just, yknow Jack Geller Monica and Rosss dad and now hes hes Jack Geller, dream hunk."
[Time lapse. Ross and Joey are cleaning the table while Judy and Phoebe talk by the window. Jack and Chandler are sitting on the couch while Monica sits on the coffee table.]
[Phoebe walks over to talk to Rachel.]
Phoebe: Rachel?
Phoebe: Okay, look at him. Look at those strong hands. Oh what I wouldnt give to be that can of (looks closer to see what Jack is drinking) condensed milk.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Time lapse. Jack is still on the couch, picking his teeth with his feet on the table. Phoebe and Judy are sitting on the table looking at him. Ross and Chandler are sitting by the window talking. Rachel and Joey are in the kitchen fooling with Rachels trifle. Monica walks into the living room from the kitchen.]
Phoebe: Monica, leave him alone!
[Monica gives Phoebe a surprised expression and goes over to Ross and Chandler.]
Rachel: No, I-I live with Phoebe. I mean youre [pity-tone] alone, alone. And I just-its just not the time for us. Im sorry.
Phoebe: So, now, Rach, this is a traditional English trifle, isnt it?
Phoebe: Wow. So then did you make it with beef or Eggplant?
Phoebe: I cant have any. You know I dont eat meat. (Faking dissapointment.) Ohhh no.
[Phoebe gets up and goes into Rachels old room, a smile on her face.]
[Phoebe comes back from Rachels old room.]
Phoebe: Rachel, come here. (Rachel walks over to Phoebe. Chandler sits down on the lounge-chair.) Okay, I was just starting to take my Thanksgiving nap, and I had another dream about Jack.
Rachel: Oh, Phoebe, do I wanna hear this?
Phoebe: I dunno, lets see! So, okay, I dreamt that we were gonna get married, and he left, becuz he had to go fight a fire. And, um, so okay, I went to a night club, and I saw him making out with a girl.
Rachel: (humoring Phoebe) Oh my God, he dream-cheated on you!
Phoebe: Yeah, but then Jacques Cousteau came and he kicked his ass for betraying me! It was soo cool! Then, he took me diving and he introduced me to his pet seahorse, who, by the way, was totally coming on to me, and please, that is not gonna happen.
Phoebe: Five minutes ago, a line like that wouldve floored me. Now nothing. Well, not nothing, I am still a woman.
[Rachel and Phoebe walk into the kitchen. Monica comes out of the bathroom and goes over to Ross.]
[Joey, Phoebe, and Rachel are sitting at the table, looking at the Geller siblings like theyre weirdos.]
Phoebe: (joining in) I love Jacques Cousteau!
Mrs. Geller: (rubbing her temples) Thats alot of information to get in in thirty seconds! Alright Joey, if wanna leave, just leave. Rachel, no you werent supposed to put beef in the trifle. It did not taste good. Phoebe, Im sorry, but I think Jacques Cousteau is dead. (Phoebe makes a sad face.) Monica, why you felt you had to hide the fact that you were in an important relationship is beyond me.
Phoebe: Why?! Whats happening to the coffee house?! (Monica looks at her.) Oh! (Realizes.)
Phoebe: Feel better?
Phoebe: Hey! New wallet, huh?
[Cut to Monica and Phoebe searching the basement.]
Phoebe: That play?
Phoebe: What are they?
Phoebe: Ohh!
Phoebe: The movie?
Phoebe: Yes! Very good.
Phoebe: Congratulations!
Phoebe: Go ahead.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, time lapse, Phoebe and Monica are playing cards as the phone rings.]
Phoebe: No, I like him a lot but I don't think I'm ready for this!
Tom: Okay. Okay. (Exits and Phoebe checks him out.)
(Phoebe and Rachel walk up.)
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Monica has hit a writers block as Rachel and Phoebe enter.]
Phoebe: Fine! (She takes the blanket.) But please God; tell me how to stop them from going off!
Phoebe: Oh. Yknow, he hums while he does other stuff to.
Phoebe: Well, I'm watching it for some friends who went out of town. Wait. (She bends down, picks up the dog, and waves with one of its paws) Hello, my name is Clunkers. May I please stay with you nice people?
Phoebe: Whoa! Why do you get to answer the door?
Phoebe: Ooh! Thats good! Wow! But now if you were pregnant, what would you name it? Hint: Phoebe.
Rachel: Ugh! (To Phoebe) What grandmother?
Rachel: Okay. Phoebe, I-I think Ross is right. What are we gonna do?
Chandler: (to Phoebe) You know what's weird. Donald Duck never wore pants. But whenever he's getting out of the shower, he always put a towel around his waist. I mean, what is that about?
Phoebe: You know if you want, we can sneak the dog back in and Chandler wouldn't even know.
Phoebe: Okay. Well theres one down.
Phoebe: Oh man.
Phoebe: So was it a lot more money?
Phoebe: Youre in my office! Look, I have made a lot of cash for this company! Okay? I am talking big bucks! Pesos! Yen! Rubles! You make one little mistake
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Monica have gathered to hear Ross perform his interpretation of Celebration by Cool and the Gang on the bag pipe.]
(Phoebe reaches into the trash can, pulls one out, and hands it to Rachel.)
Phoebe: Plus, it totally ruined my schedule! I I havent done any of the things I wanted to do by the time I was 31!
Phoebe: Oh heres a whole bunch.
Phoebe: Right.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey, Monica, and Phoebe are opening their invitations.]
Phoebe: No, I mean, I mean, when you're at the fifteenth date, y'know, you're already in a very relationshippy place. Y'know, it's... you're committed.
Monica: Who's Gladys? (Phoebe shows her a horrific painting with a half-a-body girl dummy coming out of the frame. Monica's frightened and she gasps.) Oh! What a tragic loss!
Rachel: Okay Phoebe, we can not tell anyone about this.
Phoebe: You told them he was missing?
Phoebe: Okay. Im going with you.
Phoebe: All right. Good luck.
Phoebe: Why not?!
Phoebe: What the hell are you doing?!
Phoebe: Rachel, calm down!
Phoebe: (Under her breath) God, I woke the beast. Sorry. (To Monica) I was wrong obviously, I justI misspoke. It's okay.
Phoebe: Okay. (on phone) We are at a rest stop on Route 27. Okay. (to Rachel) There is no Route 27. (listens) (to Rachel) Okay, either 93 or 76?
Phoebe: Dont be so negative! Good God! Isnt it possible that Sorry is sitting in there (Joey and Rachels apartment) right now?!
Monica: All right, we still have a minute and a half to go, and were down by two points. Two points.... (she gets interrupted by the guys, who are doing a slow-motion high five.) Phoebe you do a button-hook again. Rachel, you go long.
Phoebe: Because I was ashamed ok? I sold out for the cash! And then they give me benefits like medical, and dental, and a 401K. But you know... you pay a price. Now I'm this Corporate stooge and punching a clock and Ugh! paying taxes!
[Scene: The Street, Phoebe and Rachel are heading back from that Colonial flea market.]
Phoebe: Well thats only two days away. What is the other option?
Phoebe: Okay.
Phoebe: Yes. But I left in the Ys. 'Cause, y'know, "sometimes y". Uh, I also have something else for you. (She searches in her purse.)
Phoebe: Yeah!
Ross: Phoebe! You're note, amazing! Not only did no one touch my sandwich, but people at work are actually afraid of me. Yeah, a guy called me mental! Mental Geller, yeah, I always wanted a cool nickname like that.
Phoebe: Whats going on?
Ross: Uh Phoebe, can I see you for a second?
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is entering and arguing baseball with Erin. Phoebe and Rachel are already there.]
Phoebe: (Lightly) Oh! It ended okay. One of my friends shot him.
Phoebe: Im sorry, but I just wrote the best dance song for your wedding. Check this out. (Gets ready to play.)
Phoebe: Hey! Oh!
PHOEBE: Like crop circles, or the Bermuda triangle, or evolution?
(Ross and Mike glance at each other then both suddenly turn to Phoebe who is gone. �They sheepishly exchange glances.)
Phoebe: You know?!
Phoebe and Ross: Cigarettes?!!
Phoebe: Okay. (She starts folding the napkins in half.)
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: But you-you cant leave me with them! We-were a team! Were playing a zone! Theyre gonna triple team me!
(Ross walks down the aisle with Phoebe and Rachel on his arms.)
[Cut to Phoebe and Rachel.]
Phoebe: Oh and theyre gonna have a baby.
Phoebe: You know, the asthma guy was really cute.
Chandler: Phoebe found your pregnancy test in the trash.
Phoebe: Okay. (Phoebe turns and throws it on the couch.)
Phoebe: Okay, but you cannot tell him... but look whose back!
Phoebe: Oh, thank you! Oh... Oh my God, you're RICH!
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Phoebe are talking.]
Phoebe: Umm, when I get married will you be my maid of honor?
Phoebe: He's not backing down. He went to get lotion.
Phoebe: Yeah, so... They gotta die someday. (Mike's parents walk in) HELLO!
Joey: (To Phoebe) Oh and uh the guy who got the Paris trip is at table four.
Rachel: Hey look-look, Phoebes talking to uh, Cute Coffeehouse Guy.
Phoebe: Ooh, Soap Opera Digest!
Mike: Mom, dad, this is Phoebe. Phoebe, these are my parents: Theodore and Bitsy.
Phoebe: Ive had better.
Monica: Oh thats my doodle of a ladybug, with a top hat. (to Phoebe) Shes fancy.
Phoebe: (jumps in front of Rachel) Hi! Oh yeah, uh-huh, it's me. I saw you grab your running shoes this morning and sneak out. You lied so you could run by yourself.
Phoebe: No! No, the robots just work for them.
Phoebe: (singing) Rossss can!
Phoebe: Ooh! That's a good one! Mine is to pilot a commercial jet.
Phoebe: What do I smell?
Phoebe: What do I smell?
Phoebe: What do I smell?
Phoebe: What do I smell?
Phoebe: You know what Amanda said to me when she got me on the phone? (apes Amanda in a british accent) "Oh, so sorry to catch you on your Mo-Bile!" If-if you don't wanna get me on my mo-Bile, don't call me on my mo-Bile!"
Phoebe: Holy crap!
Phoebe: Oh, youre such a cheater!
Mike: And that's how it's done! (Phoebe kisses him)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe, Monica, and Joey are watching TV.]
Phoebe: Oh, try and stop me!