words in movies
(Joey and Ross enter. Phoebe and Mike are sitting on the couch, reading a magazine.)
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: It's really crazy! The hall, the dress, the food... I-I had no idea how expensive this stuff was!
Phoebe: So what did you two do about it?
Phoebe: But really, it does seem like this money could be put to better use?
Phoebe: Yeah! Now, how would you feel if we gave all the wedding money to charity and we just got married at City Hall?
Phoebe: Yes. We're here to make a rather sizeable donation to the children.
Phoebe: Well, I think you're gonna appreciate it the crap out of this one (she gives him a check)
Phoebe: And we don't want any recognition. This is completely anonymous.
Phoebe: Mr. X and Phoebe Buffay.
Phoebe: Buffay is spelled B-U-F-F-A-Y.
Phoebe: Sure, I so glad we did this. It feels so good!
Phoebe: Oh, look! And we get these free t-shirts! (she takes a t-shirt which was on the counter)
Phoebe: Mhm... it's moist.
Phoebe: Hello, is this the creepy residence?
Phoebe: Awe, this is so sweet of you! But you know what? I won’t be needing a veil, I actually won’t be wearing a dress at all!
Phoebe: No, no, no, we’re not having a big reception, we took the money we were gonna spend on a wedding and we donate them to the children charity.
Monica: That’s crazy! (Phoebe looks bewildered). I am sorry. I just can’t imagine giving up my one wedding day like that!
Phoebe: We, you know, we’re different! We don’t care about having a huge party. (She picks up the veil) This is really nice for you, but, oh, please, I put this on? (she puts it on) And, ow, I look (she looks her reflex image on a toaster), why, well, radiant. (pause) All right, well, who cares, I don’t need a pretty veil and a fancy dress.
Phoebe: City Hall.
Phoebe: It’s ok, it’s ok. I made my decision. What I really want is a great big wedding (she covers her mouth)
Phoebe: Well, I’ll just ask for it back!
Phoebe: It’s for our wedding day! Right, now, is this guy gay or straight, because one of us gonna have to start flirting.
Phoebe (to Mike): Gay, go.
Phoebe: The donation we made earlier, we k…, we w…, we want it back.
Phoebe: Yeah. See, that money was for a big wedding, that we thought we didn’t want, but it turns out we do.
Phoebe: I am sorry. I am, but this wedding is just really important to me.
Phoebe: Hey, that’s not fair! A person’s wedding is important! And especially to me! Ok? I didn’t have a graduation party! And I didn’t go to Prom. And I spent my sweet sixteen being chased round a tire yard by an escaped mental patient who is his own words wanted to “kill me” or whatever. So I deserve a real celebration and I am not gonna let some sweaty little man make me feel badly about it.( She storms out)
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe and Mike enter]
Phoebe: (Lightly) Oh! It ended okay. One of my friends shot him.
Phoebe: Yeah, I really do. You know, I had nothing growing up. (thinks for a few seconds) Just like the kids I took the money from.
Phoebe: Look, I can't have a wedding with this money now. It's tainted.
Phoebe: And if that guy at the charity gives us a hard time, my friend hasn't shot anyone in a really long time.
[Scene: The New York City Children's Fund building. Phoebe and Mike are entering.]
Phoebe: (to the Charity guy) We're back!
Phoebe: Yeah, because you know what, it's... it's all about the children.
(the Charity guy smiles wanting to take the check, but Phoebe pulls it back again. His smile fades.)
Phoebe: Although... it's also about the wedding... Ugh, alright... here. (she gives the check and pulls it back again) No... Oh God... Oh!
Charity guy: If I haven't said so already sir, (sarcastically pointing to Phoebe) congratulations!
Mike: (takes the check from Phoebe) Ok, look! Enough! Alright? I'm stepping in. I'm putting my foot down! As your future husband I'm going to make this decision for us. (thinking) Now... what do you think we should do?
Phoebe: But... but... but we're giving you this!
Charity guy: Yeah... And I'm giving it back to you... Come on! Consider it a contribution. (gives the check to Phoebe)
Phoebe: (looks at the amount on the check, and gasps) Well, this is very generous!
Phoebe: Oh, is that you?
[Monica and Phoebe enter.]
Phoebe: Yknow thats really fair. Yknow? Most guys who have been divorced three times are like 60. Ross, nobody cares about this except you! This-this embarrassment thing is all in your head! Here, Ill show you! Come here.
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: Okay, so now they know that you know and they don't know that Rachel knows?
Phoebe: Oh, all right. What did I have?
Phoebe: (stirring pot) Ok, all done.
Phoebe: Y'know, if you want, you can call her machine, and if she has a lot of beeps, that means she probably didn't get her messages yet.
Phoebe: Um, we went shopping for um, for, fur.
PHOEBE: Alright, I'm sorry but these people needed me. They work hard all week, it's Saturday night, they deserve to have a little fun. Go.
Phoebe: Ben, dinner!
Phoebe: I licked my arm, what?
Phoebe: So?
Phoebe: Oh let me guess, and you wanna have them all at the same time and you wanna have them for your brother.
PHOEBE: Maybe that's because you haven't taken the time to get to know him. Let's remedy that, shall we?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey, Monica, and Phoebe are there as Chandler enters.]
Ross: Hey. (Phoebe sees his bags)
Phoebe: No! Its not a cigarette! The smoke is coming out of me!
PHOEBE: Well, OK, the record company sent over this piece of paper for me to sign, saying that it's OK for someone else to sing for me. That was my first clue.
Phoebe: Wait, wait, wait, wait! (Runs over and joins in on the hug again.)
PHOEBE: You name one woman that you broke up with for a real reason.
CHANDLER: Ok, Phoebe.
Phoebe: Well, I think my mother was too busy planning her suicide to provide saltwater treats. (Ross hands her one) Thank you! So what, youre just never going to tell her?
PHOEBE: Nah. Not really.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler, Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe are standing around the table drinking champagne as Ross enters.]
Phoebe: What's goin' on?
PHOEBE: Really? You can actually see it?
PHOEBE: See, I didn't know that.
Phoebe: Yeah, you mean like that youre kind of a loner.
Ross: Okay Phoebe, I guess youre next (To Joey) although I really dont see the point.
PHOEBE: Huh. So now, the real question is, who put those fossils there, and why?
PHOEBE: Look, can't we just say that you believe in something, and I don't.
[Scene: The Doctors office, Phoebe is giving a pep talk to the petrie dish containing the embryos.]
Phoebe: I thought you said you read it in high school.
(They all decay into massive bickering as Phoebe returns from the bathroom.)
Ross: Phoebe, there is no secret. Okay? I didnt propose.
Phoebe: Im wearing his briefs right now.
Phoebe: Really? Not even to, um, change his PAJAMAS?! (Whips back the sheet to reveal him wearing new pajamas.)
PHOEBE: Janice? You called Janice?
Phoebe: Hi Phoebe Abott, Im your best friends daughter!
Phoebe: You know what? You are right. I am gonna quit. It's time I took my life back!
ROSS: It's the only possibility, Phoebe.
MONICA: Phoebe, tell her!
PHOEBE: Uh huh. Why is that?
Chandler: I think we have some time. Have you ever heard him talk? (doing David) "Uh, Phoebe, uh, I would be honoured, uh..." Spit it out, David!
Phoebe: Yeah you're always singing "Yummy yummy yummy, I've got love in my tummy"
PHOEBE: You're there!
Phoebe: Why, so he can get mad at the baby?
(Ross and Susan lift Phoebe up into the vent.)
Phoebe: (laughing) You are just nonstop!
GUY: [to Phoebe] I hear you can get people out of here.
Phoebe: Oh, hey, y'know what? Tell them that bone story.
[Scene: The Subway, Phoebe is singing for change.]
Phoebe: I know I am. That's why I can't wear a digital watch.
PHOEBE: I might have.
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe’s reading, Joey has just entered the room]
Phoebe: Y'know what, you should like, you should buy a state and then just name it after yourself.
Phoebe: (gasps) Another amazing find! Wow! Oh I bet this has a great story too!
Phoebe: Yeah, ooh, I like that! Yeah. Wait! How do you know about bah-bah-bha-bhan?
PHOEBE: Hi.
PHOEBE: Hi.
PHOEBE: Do I? Thank you, so do you.
PHOEBE: Ta-da.
DUNCAN: Phoebe!
PHOEBE: OK.
Phoebe: Oh, he needed some time to grieve.
Phoebe: (overacting badly) I cant! My circuits are fried! Theyre fried I tell you!!
Phoebe: Well, oh, ok now... Only one of us has to stay with Emma. Ok, and as the person who realized that, I get to go!
Chandler: Is not as important as the fact that Phoebe took care of the babies all by herself.
PHOEBE: What?
Rachel: Do you really not know where Im going with this? (Phoebe nods, "No.") It left! Its one huge room!
Phoebe: (speaking louder and articulating) That's she's like the daughter she never had. (Phoebe points at her ears) Listen! (Monica looks at Phoebe in a duh! way)
PHOEBE: So um, so what's up, you came to see me yesterday.
PHOEBE: And um, and there's actually a, a woman?
PHOEBE: Sure.
(Phoebe spits out her hair.)
Phoebe: It's your thing, and-
Gary: I know, really well. In fact, I'm gonna ask Phoebe to move in with me.
PHOEBE: So, um, have you told your parents?
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica, Phoebe, and Rachel are there. Rachel has just finished reading the book.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross and Monica are watching Phoebe sleep.]
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Rachel are there. Phoebe enters carrying video tapes.]
PHOEBE: Hey.
Phoebe: But, I mean, do you think hes gonna enjoy it when hes up to his elbows in the diapers from all the babies they have to have right away?! This is not fair to Frank, (she walks behind them again, and hey again turn to follow her) and it-its not fair to the babies, and y'know what, its not good home economics.
PHOEBE: It's Ross.
PHOEBE: Can you believe how much this is gonna cost?
Monica: Hey, Rach. How was it with your friends? (She and Phoebe scream.) Okay! How would you like some Tiki Death Punch? (She pours the contents of the blender into some glasses.)
PHOEBE: Let's see!
(Phoebe goes and lies down as Rachel opens the drawer Monica hid the candlesticks in and as Monica walks out of her room.)
Phoebe: Just wanna check my horoscope, see if it was right.
PHOEBE: Not for you.
PHOEBE: Fine. All right, fine.
PHOEBE: Well, then...Let's.
Phoebe: Not unless someone borrowed it and left it at the gynecologist.
PHOEBE: Yeah.
PHOEBE: Cool.
PHOEBE: So...Thank you.
Phoebe: Yeah! Ooh, we could teach them to sing, and we can be like the Von Trapp family! Only without the Nazis. Although that sounds kinda dull.
PHOEBE: Fine.
Phoebe: Well, he may not be my soul mate, but a girls gotta eat.
Joey: Oh, okay. Phoebe, do you take this man to be your husband?