words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, and Rachel are there, as Phoebe enters with her date.]
Phoebe: (to her date) Okay, and then this is the coffee house. This is where I play my music. (points to the stage)
Phoebe: Yeah, and these are my friends. People. This is Vince, Vince the people.
Phoebe: Vince is a fireman.
Vince: (to Phoebe) Look, I gotta go. I'm on call tonight. (kisses her) See you Saturday. (leaves)
Phoebe: Okay. (watches him leave)
Phoebe: Oh, Jason? Yeah, uh-huh, we're seeing each other tonight.
Phoebe: I know, I know! I'm like playing the field. Y'know? Like, juggling two guys, I'm sowing my wild oats. Y'know? Y'know, this kind've like y'know oat-sowin', field-playin' juggler.
Phoebe: Does a dog's lips move when he reads? (Joey makes an `I don't know' face, and looks to Chandler and Rachel, who're also stumped) Okay, no they don't.
[cut to Phoebe and Rachel as Monica returns from the bathroom]
[Scene: A Street, Phoebe is walking with her second date, Jason.]
Phoebe: That is so great! Oh, I... (sees that a parked car near them has caught on fire) Oh my God!
Phoebe: (the fire has worsened) Oh my God!!!
Phoebe: (stopping him) No! No!
Phoebe: Well, we don't n-n-n-n-need a fireman, we'd, we'd like a good mechanic. (hears the sound of approaching sirens) Oh my God, here they come! Well, we gotta get out of here!
Phoebe: Well look, if I wanted to see a fireman, I would date one. Okay? (she drags him away)
Phoebe: (entering with Rachel) and I-I can't take it! Y'know? I'm just, always afraid one of them is gonna catch me with the other one. It's making me crazy.
Phoebe: (disgusted) Uh.
Phoebe: Well, it just, it doesn't feel like playing anymore, it feels like work. It's like I'm working in the field.
Phoebe: Well, Vince is great, y'know `cause, he's like a guy, guy. Y'know? He's so burly, he's sooo very burly. (giggles)
Phoebe: Yeah, but Jason's really sensitive.
Phoebe: Yeah.
Phoebe: Jason is not a sissy!
Rachel: (entering with Phoebe) This place is amazing.
Phoebe: God, that is the nicest kitchen.
Phoebe: No! But it's the nicest kitchen, the refrigerator told me to have a great day.
Phoebe: All right. I gotta go. I have break up with Vince.
Phoebe: Yeah, I like Vince a lot, y'know? But, its just Jasons so sensitive, y'know? And in the long run, I think sensitive its just better than having just like a really, really, really nice (pause) butt. (Her eyes glaze over thinking about the butt.) (pause) Jason! Definitely Jason! Okay, wish me luck!
[Scene: A Fire House, Phoebe has gone to break up with Vince.]
Phoebe: Excuse me. Umm, is Vince here?
Phoebe: Wow! I didnt know you guys actually used those.
Phoebe: Umm, wow. This-this isnt gonna be easy. Umm, I dont think we should see each other anymore.
Phoebe: Im sorry.
Phoebe: Oh my God, I didnt
Phoebe: (running after him) Wait-wait-wait! Wait!!
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Ross, and Monica are there.]
Phoebe: (to Ross) Im telling you, if you want to take care of that thing, you should go to my herbal guy.
Phoebe: (gasps) Oh, you so would! Oh, you should get that anyway. (They both look at her.) Like for clubbing.
Phoebe: Hey Mon umm, if you do get married, can I bring two guests?
Phoebe: No, that was my way of telling you. Well, it turns out hes incredibly sensitive, he keeps a journal and he paints. He even showed me charcoal drawings that he drew of me.
Phoebe: Yeah, well hed prefer water colors, but y'know, he has easy access to a lot of charcoal.
Phoebe: Well, yeah, because I have to break up with someone, and Okay so Jason is sensitive, (holds up one finger) but now sos Vince (holds up one finger on her other hand) Plus, Vince has the body y'know? (holds up two more fingers on the Vince side) So Its really just about the math.
[Scene: Jasons apartment, Phoebe has gone to break up with Jason.]
Phoebe: (knocks on the door) Jason?
Jason: So Phoebe, you ah, sounded kinda serious on the phone, is ah, is anything wrong?
Phoebe: Nah-ha!
[Scene: Phoebes Herbal Guys office, Ross is there about his thing. Ross is looking around the exam room, and he goes over to a large bank of drawers, pulls one out and almost spills it as the herbalist, Guru Saj, enters.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebes singing, Vince is also there.]
Phoebe: (singing) Crazy underwear, creepin up my butt. (Jason enters) Crazy underwear, always in a rut. Crazy under-(sees Jason)-wear (In her head) Oh No! What is he doing here? All right, just keep playing, just keep playing. Youll get through this; youll be fine. (She tries to continue the song, but she has lost the ability to pronounce words, and the lyrics come out as gibberish.) (giving up on the song) Okay, thank you. And, as always no one talk to me after the show.
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: I dont know, he just started kissing me. Get him! Get him, Vince!
Phoebe: Yeah, okay, Ive-Ive been dating both of you, and its been really horrible. Cause y'know its been a lot of fun, for me. Umm, but I-I like you both, and I, and I didnt know how to chose, so... Im sorry, Im just, Im terrible, Im a terrible person. Im terrible.
Vince: Phoebe, Phoebe relax, its okay. I mean we never said this was exclusive.
Phoebe: Really?!
Phoebe: Well, this is none of my business. (starts to walk away)
Jason: (to Phoebe) I-I cant believe this! You-youve slept with him?!
Phoebe: Well, I made you a candle light dinner in the park.
Jason: Y'know Phoebe, Im gonna make this real easy for you. (walks out)
Phoebe: (to Vince) Well, that couldve been really awkward.
Phoebe: Yeah, but I-I-I-I can do that for you, Im gonna do that for you.
PHOEBE: Everything you've heard is true.
PHOEBE: Hey now you have two. [Chandler looks annoyed] Oh, now you have two.
Phoebe: Hi Monica!
PHOEBE: No, huh uh, I'm sorry, no. No, I'm not some like sloppy second, charity band. You know what, there are thousands of places in this city where people would be happy to pay to hear me play. (Out on the sidewalk, singing) When I play, I play for me, I don't need your charity. (Someone puts a coin in her guitar case) Thank you! La la la la la la la....
Joey: You shut up! (To Phoebe and Rachel) I love arguing with her. (To Erin) Ill be right back.
Rachel: Oh! Phoebe, all babies are beautiful!
[Scene: Central Park, Ross is teaching Ben how to ride a bike. Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are they also.]
[Scene: Phoebe and Rachel's, they are entering to check out the newly refurbished apartment.]
Phoebe: Oh...yes..is this..umm..Emilys Parents house.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Rachel are there]
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, um-mm. Oh!
Phoebe: Oh great! And listen, could you do us a favor and not tell Chandler and Monica about this? Cause yknow umm, they dont-they dont have any kids of their own and-and this door was like a child to them.
(Chandler sees Phoebe breaking up with Tony. She talks to him for a few seconds, hugs him, and then he leaves. Chandler is amazed how easy it was for her.)
Phoebe: Okay, you guys. You guys I think I know whats going on here. Okay, you guys STOP!! (They stop.) I know that, I know that youre acting mad because you think that itll make it easier to leave. But deep down youre still really sad. Deep-deep down.
Phoebe: Ok, we're taking that paddle home, mister.
Phoebe: Alright. I looked all over the building and I couldn't find the kitty anywhere.
Phoebe: Where? (Turns to face him) Ooh, come to Momma.
Phoebe: Monica, she will kill you. She will kill you like a dog in the street.
Phoebe: Monica, do you want us to take you home?
[Scene: Joey's apartment, Joey is showing Phoebe around.]
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Chandler, and Ross are there.]
PHOEBE: Is anyone else starting to really like him?
Phoebe: Okay. (she starts to stuff styrofoam peanuts down the front of Joey's pants.)
PHOEBE: Well you said that he's paying the people who are playing.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Phoebe are preparing for a barbecue for Rachel's birthday.]
Phoebe: Uh-huh, yeah thats too bad. I really want to go to his concert Friday night, but its totally sold out. I know! Why dont you meet him and get tickets?! If you get two Ill take you.
PHOEBE: Oh ok, Ryan, that guy I went out with, who's in the Navy.
PHOEBE: Are you the cutest?
[Next is a shot of them dragging an enormous plant into the room, then Monica knitting a sweater, then Phoebe singing, then Phoebe shaving him and chatting to Monica]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Phoebe and Ryan are playing Monopoly.]
[Scene: Ross, Phoebe, Rachel, and Chandler at Monica and Rachel's apartment.]
Phoebe: Theyre gonna get through this, arent they?
Phoebe: Hey, tell him about Relaxi-Taxi, and-and ask him if he thinks thats better than Relaxi Cab.
Phoebe: Thank you! I know, though.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica, Rachel, Ross, and Phoebe are there. Phoebe is looking out the window.]
Phoebe: (entering) Hello.
Rachel: Joey look, just look at it this way, the sooner Phoebe breaks Chandler the sooner this is all over and out in the open.
Phoebe: We could not, would not want to wait.
Monica: Ooh, Phoebe, you look great!
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there as Phoebe enters.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Phoebe enters to see Monica, Richard, Ross, and Rachel tearfully watching TV.]
Phoebe: Ohh. Um-hmm. But y'know, she choose to find me. I mean, I have to respect her decision. Right?
Phoebe: Okay, thanks. Yeah, I'll try that.
Phoebe: What am I gonna do?
(Phoebe is trying not to smile. He moves closer and very shyly holds out his hand and turns his head, hoping for Phoebe to take his hand. She doesn't.)
(The man jumps out, obviously a little scared. Phoebe drives off.)
Phoebe: That won't go with this dress though.
Phoebe: Monica! We lived together for years! Ive seen you naked!
Phoebe: Monica, you don't know that.
Phoebe: No, listening! Sit! Yknow, maybe it would just really, really help if you would just talk.
Phoebe: Ok, somebody is on their way to ruin wedding okay. And I have to warn somebody, alright. So if you dont give me that number then Im going to come over there and kick your snooty ass all the way to New Glocken..shire.
Phoebe: Well, 'cause then they'd be like my mom used to make them, you know, before she died.
Phoebe: She is so great! I miss her.
Phoebe: Duh!! Christmas!
Phoebe: I'm not. I'm praying. (looking up) Please let the Knicks win... Thank you Thor! (Mike is standing up) Where... where are you going?
Phoebe: Well, you know what Chandler? I think you've gotta face it. You're like, the guy in the big office, you know. You're the one that hires them, that fires them... They still say you're a great boss.
Phoebe: Okay, we're on it. We're on it.
Phoebe: Yeah! And until then you are going to sing to me because the radios broken and you are selfish but have a nice voice.
Phoebe: It's a tarantula! (Joey almost falls down from his drum-stool jumping up) Oh! God! Rachel, look, I'm sorry. What was I thinking giving Joey this big, gross, scary spider in such a poorly constructed cage?
Phoebe: (pointing at cake) Hey, you made it into a bunny.
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Chandler, Monica, and Rachel are there as Phoebe enters with her nose stuck in a book.]
Phoebe: Well, umm, not much. But, I was just thinking that since those guys just got engaged that maybe it would be nice if they had some privacy, yknow? So, could I just move in with you for a couple days?
Phoebe: How did you do that?
[Monica goes into her room and slams the door. Rachel does the same. Phoebe, without a door to slam, opens a small chest and slams the lid.]
Phoebe: Most likely. (raises and goes toward the door) Okay, I'm gonna be out there.
Phoebe: What?
Rachel: Someone? I brought people. Mr. Thompson, this is Phoebe. Phoebe, this is Mr. Thompson. (She introduces them.) Hes the head of my department.
Phoebe: Um, yeah, you want Ursula, and I'm Phoebe. Twin sisters! Seriously.
Phoebe: Oooh. Oh, well this is awkward.
Phoebe: Okay, well if I was in this for the money, Id be a millionaire by now, y'know. You just got to get out of that jingle head sweetie.
Phoebe: A-ha! And... what is bluffing? Is it not another word for... lying?
Phoebe: Oh, this life! Oh okay no, Chandler's is worse.
(They look up towards the vent and wave at Phoebe.)
Phoebe: She's already fluffed that pillow... Monica, you know, you've already fluffed that- (Monica glares at her.) -but, it's fine!
Phoebe: (entering) Hi!
All: Hey, Phoebe.
Phoebe: Definitely.
Phoebe: Yeah, but did they have to shoot him down? I mean, that was just mean.
Phoebe: Im sorry, okay, I-I wasnt looking, and the store says that they wont take it back because you signed for it...
Phoebe: She's gonna say goodbye to each of us individually.
Phoebe: Oh, okay then.
Phoebe: (simultaneous to the others) Ble-blah-blar Blargh!
Phoebe: Oh, yeah. What's this? (picks up a book)
Phoebe: Oh.
Phoebe: Good. So what were you thinking?
Phoebe: Oh, okay. (he kisses her)
Phoebe: Really?
PHOEBE: I'm almost done with it, keep your panties on.
Rachel: Phoebe, what are you doing?
Phoebe: Thank you, Monica.
Phoebe: What are you saying I should do?
Phoebe: Yes? Yes! Oh.
Malcom: Phoebe?
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel is talking to a man at the counter. Ross and Phoebe are sitting at the couches.]
[Scene: Outside Central Perk, Monica and Phoebe are showing everyone the van they bought for the catering business. Its an old Dodge van, that has a cartoon woman riding on a dragon painted on the side of it.]
[Scene: Carol's Room, she is ready to give birth. Everyone is there except for Phoebe, Ross, and Susan, who are in the broom closet.]
Phoebe: Awe, this is so sweet of you! But you know what? I won’t be needing a veil, I actually won’t be wearing a dress at all!
Phoebe: Hey.
Rachel: Hello? Like he was really gonna send you one? (To Phoebe) She was a big girl.
Phoebe: What a sad little life she must lead. Okay, ooh (starts dialing).