words in movies
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe and Monica are there as Joey is entering excitedly.]
Phoebe: Oh my God! (Joey looks at her.) Im sorry, too soon. You go.
Phoebe: Good for you!
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Phoebe are drinking coffee and Phoebe notices a cute guy checking them out.]
Phoebe: Oh my God! That guy at the counter is totally checking you out!
Phoebe: Go for it.
Monica: Phoebe, Im engaged!
Phoebe: Im just saying, get his number just in case. But no Chandler is in an accident and cant perform sexually and he would want you to take a lover to satisfy the needs that he can no longer fulfill.
The Cute Guy: (To Phoebe) I thought you knew I was looking at you.
Phoebe: I did, but that was really fun.
Joey: (pretending to be an announcer) And the winner is Joey Tribbiani! (He then gets excited and goes over to the counter to practice his acceptance speech using a bottle of maple syrup as the award.) Oh Wow! I honestly never expected this. I uh, I didnt prepare a speech. But umm, Id like to thank (Rachel enters quietly) my parents, whove always been there for me. Id also like to thank my friends, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, Rachel
[Scene: Monicas Restaurant Kitchen, shes cooking as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: Oh hey!
Phoebe: Oh, great! We couldnt keep our eyes off each other all night and then every once and a while yknow, hed kinda lean over and stroke my hair and touch my neck. (Does that to Monica.)
Monica: Okay, stop it Phoebe, youre getting me all tingly.
Phoebe: (laughs) All I could think of was yknow, "Is he gonna kiss me? Is he gonna kiss me?"
Phoebe: Im a lady Monica, I dont kiss and tell. But this hickey speaks for itself. (She starts to open up her blouse.)
Phoebe: I just like him so much that I just feel like Ive had 10 drinks today and Ive only had six.
Phoebe: You sound like a guy.
Phoebe: Youll have a last kiss.
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is saying good-bye to her boyfriend Jake at the door to Central Perk.]
Jake: Bye Phoebe.
Phoebe: Okay bye. (They kiss.)
Phoebe: Bye! (Phoebe goes over and joins Monica on the couch.) We said good-bye at the door so as not to flaunt our new love.
Monica: Phoebe, its okay. You dont have to tip toe around me. I-Ive been thinking about it and umm, yknow what? Im okay about not having that new relationship feeling
Jake: (yelling through the window to Phoebe) I miss you already!!
Phoebe: (yelling back) I miss you too!!!! (He walks away.)
Monica: See? Thats what I mean. I mean that, thats great! But I wouldnt trade in what I have for that. I mean Im gonna be with Chandler for the rest of my life, and thats what makes me happy. (Chandler approaches.) Hey sweetie, come here! Come sit down. Hey Phoebe and I were just talking about how our relationship is deep and meaningful. It really is dont you think?
Joey: (angrily and monotone) Any one of the brilliant actresses nominated for this award tonight deserves to take it home. Unfortunately only one can. (Shakes his head in disgust.) The nominees for Best Supporting Actress are from Passions Erin Goff. (There is applause, which Joey disgustedly waits to dye out.) From One Life to Live Mary Loren Bishop (They start to applaud again, but Joey interrupts in with the rest of the nominees), from All My Children Sarah Mchann, and from Days of Our Lives Jessica Ashley. And the winner is (Opens the envelope) Jessica Ashley from Days of Our Lives. (Applause) Uh, unfortunately Jessica couldnt be with us tonight so Ill be accepting this award on her behalf. (Realizes something) And Im sure that Jessica would like to thank my parents who always believed in me. Shed also like to thank my friends, Chandler, Monica, Ross, Phoebe, and Rachel whos sittin right there! (Points at Rachel.) (The music starts and his microphone is turned off, this angers Joey again and he disgustedly exits.)
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is sitting on the couch as Monica enters.]
Phoebe: No. Why?
Phoebe: Okay, dont sweat it. (Looking around her.) Chandler is nowhere around so go ahead get it out of your system. That guys cute. (Points to a guy sitting behind Monica.)
Monica: Phoebe! Come on Im serious! I just got to talk to him about all this.
Phoebe: No that is the last thing you want to do!
Phoebe: Because youre marrying him!
Phoebe: All right, Ive never been engaged and Ive never really been married, but I can only tell you what my mother told me. Whenever you have doubts or fears or anxieties about a relationship, do not communicate them to your husband.
Phoebe: That is correct! Yes, youre supposed to take all of that stuff and put it in a little box in your mind and then lock it up tight.
Phoebe: Yes!
Phoebe: Oh my God! Youre right! Go! (Monica starts to leave.) Go tell Chandler! Hurry before its too late! Wait no! (Monica stops.) Does this also mean putting out doesnt get you love? (Monica is shocked.)
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering.]
Phoebe: Rach?
(Phoebe notices the Soapie on the counter.)
Phoebe: Oh. (Picks it up.) Its just so unexpected! I I uh Boy Ill tell you its just such an honor to be nominated for a Nobel Prize and yknow to win one for a massage. Especially after having just won a Tony award for best actress in
Phoebe: in Reservations at 8:00 by Neil Simon. (To an imaginary Neil Simon) Thank-thank you Neil. Thank you for the words. (Blows him a kiss.)
Phoebe: Please, dont play the music. Just uh one more. LIVE FROM NEW YORK! ITS SATURDAY NIGHT!!
Phoebe: Listen, I think I've left something here.
Phoebe: (realizes) Ooh, maybe that's him!
Phoebe: Well it depends.
Phoebe: I'm a woman!
Phoebe: Wow! Talking about high maintenance
Phoebe: While drinking...
Phoebe: Oh my god.
Phoebe: Well yes Rachel but you got something so beautiful out there
[Scene: The ticket-counter. Ross and Phoebe have their tickets and start looking at the screens in order to find the gate.]
Phoebe: Yeah. Oh! It'll be like I have a wife in the fifties!
PHOEBE: (spotting Rachel's dress) Oooh.� Girl's night out indeed.
Phoebe: (shocked) Oh, well, it's a shame that you-that you miss the movie 'cause we were gonna see, you know, either "Liar, Liar" or "Betrayal", or... "An Affair To Remember".
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel, Chandler, Monica, and Joey are there as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: OK, fine, if it means that much to you I'll get rid of Bob.
Phoebe: (without moving her lips, wearing a fake smile) Okay, I will. (to Rita) This is my husband Crap Bag.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is trying to move off of the couch as Rachel enters.]
(Mike kisses Phoebe)
Phoebe: Hi hi...Oh you have got to sing.
Phoebe: All the time when you're cooking.
Phoebe: Can you totally see through her shirt ?
Ross: (seeing Phoebe still with cat) You didnt tell her?! (They all kinda shy away.) Okay, fine! Pheebs?
Phoebe: I'm... I'm just... I'm the worst person ever. How can I not tell David that I'm seeing Mike?
Phoebe: Every little bit of you!
Phoebe: Yes, she gives the people what they want.
Phoebe: Well thats no way to sell newspapers. Why dont you try, "Extra! Extra! Read all about it!"
Hitchhiker: All right, see ya Pheebs. (Gets out and Phoebe drives away.)
Chandler: Say Ross, when you picture Phoebe living on the street, is she surrounded by the entire cast of Annie?
Phoebe: Hey.
Phoebe: What you got?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment. Joey is there as Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: No, no-no, she was a human lady. This is the spirit of my Mom Lily, the one who killed herself.
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's class; the class has ended and Phoebe is talking to one of her classmates.]
Rachel: Well, Phoebe set me up on a date.
Phoebe: Ooh, Joey.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah.
Phoebe: A teacher?
Phoebe: Yeah.
Phoebe: Joey.
Phoebe: So now what do we do?
Phoebe: How do you even know a woman like that?
Phoebe: Good. (Phoebe and Mrs. Burkart go into the other room, leaving Monica with everyone staring at her.)
Chandler: Phoebe, did you see that?! He totally checked you out! He is so cute! (Looking at his tea.) Mine has a picture of The Village People, what does that mean?
Phoebe: No! No! I just went to pick up Phoebe Buffays checks; there were a lot of them.
[Scene: Outside Room 816, Phoebe and Joey are approaching.]
Phoebe: You must be a fireball in bed.
Phoebe: oh umm Mike's picking me up for a date.
Eric: Im not smart. (Phoebe has no comeback.) I just wanted so much to be impulsive once. To be romantic.
Phoebe: Are you kidding? People acting like animals to music. Come on!
Phoebe: Hey, Rach!
Phoebe: Hello?
Phoebe: My dear, sweet Rach.
Phoebe: (thinking to herself) Chandlers knees. Chandlers ankles. Chandlers ankle hair. (notices the clock) Oh no. (to Rick) Okay, youre all set.
Phoebe: (To Joey) How could you pick up a hitchhiker?! He could be a rape(She holds her hand in front of the hitchhikers face), a rapist or a killer or something!
[Scene: Phoebes, Frank is melting a plastic spoon.]
Rachel: Of course I packed! Monica relax! I just wanted to ask Phoebe her opinion on what I should wear tonight.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Phoebe are returning from class.]
Phoebe: Yeah That does sound great. I'm going to get the phone. (They both get up.)
Phoebe: Don't, don't do the plan-laugh.
(Phoebe sees Rachel and Ross through the window.)
Phoebe: Mexico!
Phoebe: Oh, they see us! Oh, they, they look mad. Oh, they figured it out. They're coming this way. Run!
Phoebe: (walking up) Whats up? (Rachel hands her the note and she reads it.) Tell Monica Im sorry. (Pause) Tell her yourself!
Rachel: No! You gotta get me out of here Phoebe! These bargain shoppers are crazy!
Phoebe: Yeah, what is that? Like, some kind of guy thing? Like, some kind of sexist guy thing? Like it's poker, so only guys can play?
Joey: Now he's movin'? Man, what is Emily doing to him? (Phoebe pinches him again.) Ow!! He's not even here!!!
Phoebe: Right. (Pause) Or you might get everything youve wanted since you were fifteen.
Phoebe: Why??
Phoebe: I want you to stay.
Phoebe: I'll miss you.
Phoebe: Great! Ok...I'll go get the tube top.
Phoebe: (simultaneously) Holy mother of God!!!
Joey: Now-now, listen this is just a first draft so (Starts to read the piece of paper he brought.) "We are gathered here today on this joyous occasion to celebrate the special love that Monica and Chandler share." (Monica and Chandler like it so far.) Eh? (He continues reading.) "It is a love based on giving and receiving. As well as having and sharing. And the love that they give and have is shared and received. And through this having and giving and sharing and receiving." (Phoebe nods her approval.) "We too can share and love and have and receive."
Phoebe: Okay! Okay! (Puts it out and comes out of the bathroom.) Im so glad youre here.
Phoebe: Hey you guys! Ok, we've got great news.
Mike: Phoebe and I are moving in together.
Phoebe: Uh huh...we're playing you two.
Phoebe: Hmmm... No, no... No, I can't do this. It's bad.
Phoebe: Yeah! You bet roomy!
Phoebe: China patterns!!!!!
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers. Phoebe and Ross are sitting in the living room talking.]
Phoebe: What do you mean?
Mike: Look. Phoebe, I-I love you. Very much. But I never want to get married again.
Phoebe: Oh. Wow.
Phoebe: I think it's just y'know that I haven't been with a guy in so long and how sometimes you're looking for something and you just dont even see that it's right there in front of you sipping coffeeOh no, have I said to much? Well it's just something to think about. I know I will.
Phoebe: But it's just...
(We hear Phoebes muffled voice through the ceiling.)
Phoebe: Oh!
Phoebe: No! No, her cab! She probably won't be using it; you can drive it to Las Vegas.
Phoebe: Yeah I get that.
Phoebe: Unless! Unless umm, okay I-I would be willing to go to the concert, umm, all the while thinking about the children of course.
Phoebe: Hi
[Scene:Ross's apartment. Phoebe is at the door.]
Phoebe: Never.
[Scene: Phoebes hospital room, Joey and Ross enter as Phoebe comes out of the bathroom wearing her robe.]
Phoebe: Mike doesn't ever wanna get married.
Phoebe: That's not how you really feel is it?
Phoebe: I do love Mike.
Phoebe: Okay, bye-bye! (Pushes Chandler out the door.) Good trip! (Slams the door)
Phoebe: It's not cooler.
Phoebe: Yeah I guess you're right. Yeah thanks. This helped. Thanks.