words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Eddie's apartment. Chandler is at the foosball table trying to get Phoebe to play a game with him.]
PHOEBE: No. This game is grotesque. Twenty armless guys joined at the waist by a steel bar, forced to play soccer forever. Ahh, hello, human-rights violation.
PHOEBE: Why don't you play with your roommate?
PHOEBE: Uh oh, ooh, are we not getting along with the new boy?
PHOEBE: Maybe that's because you haven't taken the time to get to know him. Let's remedy that, shall we?
PHOEBE: Oh yeah, it'll be fun. [throws a tennis ball at Eddie's bedroom door]
PHOEBE: Hi, um, I just thought that it would be fun if the three of us had some beers and got to know each other.
PHOEBE: Oh good, ok. Oh nooo, I have to go because I'm late for my um, Green Eggs and Ham discussion group. Um tonight it's why he would not eat them on a train. Have fun bye.
PHOEBE: I know, yeah. Ok, talk to him. [leaves]
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe is singing. Monica, Richard, Ross, and Rachel are listening.]
PHOEBE: And a crusty old man said I'll do what I can and the rest of the rats played moroccas. That's it, thanks, good night.
PHOEBE: I know.
PHOEBE: Oh, this is so nice. Alright I have to make a speech. I just wanna say that of all the guys that Monica has been with, and that is a lot, I like you the best.
PHOEBE: Ok.
[Scene: Central Perk. Joey enters with several magazines and runs up to Phoebe.]
PHOEBE: Oh, ooh, Soap Opera Digest, oh that's one of my favorite digests.
PHOEBE: Ok, ok, ok. Ooh, hey 'new doc on the block, Days of Our Lives' Joey Tribbiani.' Ooh, cool picture.
PHOEBE: Hey is this true, that you write a lot of your own lines?
PHOEBE: Ohh, ok, I see what you did there. Aren't you afraid though, that the writers are gonna be kinda mad when they read this?
PHOEBE: Why would you kill his fish?
CHANDLER: Because sometimes, Phoebe after you sleep with someone, you have to kill the fish.
PHOEBE: Listen, sorry about your death, that really sucks.
PHOEBE: But Joey, you're gonna be fine. You don't need that show, it was just a dumb soap opera.
JOEY: Phoebe, this was the greatest thing that ever happened to me.
PHOEBE: Yes, I was going to incorporate that. Oh good, here's Monica, she'll have something nice to say.
Phoebe: Oh my God! I cant believe my little brother is married!
Phoebe: Oh my God. This is where you got all our stuff, Pottery Barn! Oh my God!
Chandler: My God! He wants to do it with Phoebe in London!
(He puts his leg up on the table to pass Joey the cookies, and Phoebe sees what the guys are laughing at, and gasps.)
Phoebe: That oughta do it.
Phoebe: Lotsa things.
Phoebe: (entering, carrying two garbage bags) Hey!
Joey: I want you to take this seriously! Phoebe is very very important to me, ok? And I wanna make sure that you are gonna take care of her.
Phoebe: Oh, look, he's got Ross's haircut!
Monica: I just tell her, I have to get it over with. I told Ross and Phoebe and shes the only one left!
Joey: Well, is it, like, a little annoying, or is it like when Phoebe chews her hair?
Phoebe: Hey.
PHOEBE: What, what's about to happen? [starts watching] I've never seen this part before. Hey, Travis, watcha doin' with that gun? Oh no, no no Travis, put down the gun. No no no no, he he's your buddy, he's your Yeller, no, no no, the end, THE END. [hear the gunshot from the TV] [Scene:Monica and Rachel's apartment. Richard is on the balcony smoking and Monica is on the phone.]
Phoebe: How long did you think this barbecue was gonna last?
Phoebe: Oh, let me see! (takes the picture)
Monica: Hey Phoebe. Hey, tell me what you think. All right. The house next door to the one that we're buying in Westchester? Just went on the market. I wanna take a look at it, but Chandler doesn't.
Phoebe: Remembered what?
Monica: (goes to Chandler) Phoebe and Rachel saw you with Nancy today and... em... they think you're having an affair.
Phoebe: My mother killed herself.
(Phoebe gets up, holds the picture of Ross up to her face.)
Phoebe: Hey Joey, want come with me to… are you ok?
Phoebe: You dont have to do that, Ross and Joey arent here, you can watch the parade if you want.
Phoebe: Why dont take care of this one, and should I get pregnant again, Ill hold onto your card, okay?
Phoebe: Or...or we can chant and dance around naked, you know, with sticks.
Monica and Phoebe: Sure.
Phoebe: How many beeps?
Phoebe: Oh my God! Monicas just gonna kill you.
[Scene: Barbados, hotel lounge. David, Phoebe and Rachel have just arrived.]
Joey and Chandler: Hey Phoebe!
Phoebe: Maybe there's someone else.
Phoebe: Yeah, yeah but I am not sure about some of the bra's I got.
Phoebe: Oh, no-no, this place is totally healthy! Thatthis milk is mine. I bought this today, 'cause I was thirsty for milk, y'know. (She takes a swig of it, but has to turn away from him as she makes a face to show that it has gone bad.) Okay, let's go!
Phoebe: No-no, oh, Im fine with the age thing y'know, until it starts sticking its tongue down my little brothers throat!
Phoebe: Eww! Oh, its all dirty. You should throw this out.
(Phoebe nods as he stands up in delight.)
Chandler, Phoebe, and Rachel: I had one.
Phoebe: Atlantic City, baby! Let's roll some bones! Hey Joey, high-five for rolling bones!
Phoebe: Have you two, you know... like... you know... you know... yet?
Phoebe: Yes.
Phoebe: Wait, no, look at this! (Points to one.) (Reading) "Two bedroom, two bath, must be non-smoker, Satan worshipers okay " Oh, yeah, but its on the ground floor.
(Trying not to wrinkle her nose, Phoebe smiles back realising it's down to her to make up for her negligent sister. Meanwhile, Ursula still hasn't received her side salad, but when she attempts to attract the waiter's attention, he ignores her.)
Phoebe: Alright, wait, so what you're saying is that the chef is at the Hamilton Club, but the food is not and the drinks are there, but the bartender is not? Are you, are you FREAKING KIDDING ME!?
Robert: (to Phoebe) So are ready for the gym? Theyve got this new rock climbing wall, we can spot each other.
(Ross and Susan run to the delivery room, leaving Phoebe dangling from the vent.)
Mrs. Waltham: Oh my God, Phoebe.
Ross: So, guys, am I crazy, or does Phoebes mom remind anyone of a cat?
Phoebe: Oh, but I can't do that-
Phoebe: Ohh! No.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe are there.]
Phoebe: I'm still on "no."
Phoebe: There we go.You know what, if we were in prison, you guys would be, like, my bitches.
Phoebe: All right, so what were you thinking?
Phoebe: You cant fire him and dump him the same day, hell kill himself.
Phoebe: Where?
PHOEBE: [enters] Hey you guys, you will never guess who's coming to New York.
Rachel: Oh. (we hear laughing from the upstairs apartment) Oh my God, is that Phoebe?
PHOEBE: Phoebe, just watch that, I promise it will resotre all your faith in humanity.
Phoebe: Yeah, I can't say that. uhm... Susie, I'm gonna be straight with you... Mike and I are back together... and uhm... unfortunately that effectively ends your relationship with him. And he's very sorry about that and wishes you the best of luck in all your endeavours.
Phoebe: Oh. Oh!
Phoebe: Oh my God!
Phoebe: Okay, this will keep them away from your stuff. (Writes him a note and the gang reads it.)
Phoebe: (reading): Your Visa bill is huge!
Phoebe: (entering) Everbody this is Frank! This is my half-brother Frank.
Phoebe: Oh, look, look, he's closing his eyes. (screen goes blank) Look, he's opening his eyes. (picture comes back)
Phoebe: (to Chandler and Ross) Thank you.
Phoebe: Oh my God! Youre getting a massage! You never let me massage you!!
[They keep flicking each other. This turns into slapping each other. This leads to wrestling on the floor. All the while Phoebe is saying "Happy thoughts". Eventually Phoebe gets fed up.]
Phoebe: Demi Moore.
Phoebe: Okay. (They shake hands and she pulls away suddenly) Oh my God! What did I ever do to you?! (Rubbing her hand.)
Phoebe: Oh yeah! Oh, I can do that.
Phoebe: Good! Good! I was just testing you.
Phoebe: You wanna do it right now?
(Theres a knock on the door. The gang is stunned and Phoebe counts to make sure that everyone is there. Out of curiosity Chandler goes and answers the door.)
[Monica and Phoebe enter.]
Phoebe: Yknow thats really fair. Yknow? Most guys who have been divorced three times are like 60. Ross, nobody cares about this except you! This-this embarrassment thing is all in your head! Here, Ill show you! Come here.
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: Okay, so now they know that you know and they don't know that Rachel knows?
Phoebe: Oh, all right. What did I have?
Phoebe: (stirring pot) Ok, all done.
Phoebe: Y'know, if you want, you can call her machine, and if she has a lot of beeps, that means she probably didn't get her messages yet.
Phoebe: Um, we went shopping for um, for, fur.
PHOEBE: Alright, I'm sorry but these people needed me. They work hard all week, it's Saturday night, they deserve to have a little fun. Go.
Phoebe: Ben, dinner!
Phoebe: I licked my arm, what?
Phoebe: So?
Phoebe: Oh let me guess, and you wanna have them all at the same time and you wanna have them for your brother.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey, Monica, and Phoebe are there as Chandler enters.]
Ross: Hey. (Phoebe sees his bags)
Phoebe: No! Its not a cigarette! The smoke is coming out of me!
PHOEBE: Well, OK, the record company sent over this piece of paper for me to sign, saying that it's OK for someone else to sing for me. That was my first clue.
Phoebe: Wait, wait, wait, wait! (Runs over and joins in on the hug again.)
PHOEBE: You name one woman that you broke up with for a real reason.
CHANDLER: Ok, Phoebe.
Phoebe: Well, I think my mother was too busy planning her suicide to provide saltwater treats. (Ross hands her one) Thank you! So what, youre just never going to tell her?
PHOEBE: Nah. Not really.
[Scene: Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe's, Chandler, Joey, Rachel, and Phoebe are standing around the table drinking champagne as Ross enters.]
Phoebe: What's goin' on?
PHOEBE: Really? You can actually see it?
PHOEBE: See, I didn't know that.
Phoebe: Yeah, you mean like that youre kind of a loner.