words in movies
[Scene: Chandler and Monica's apartment. They are having a diner party with Phoebe and Mike.]
Phoebe: Oh! Yeah, this is fun, couples night.
Phoebe: Wow!
Phoebe: I do, he's been working on that all day! (looking at Joey)
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe, Monica and Chandler on their couch.]
Phoebe: Hey Mon? Was it weird changing your name to Geller-Bing?
Phoebe: Where did you go to do it?
Mike: (walks to the couch with coffee for Phoebe) Here you go.
Phoebe: Thanks! Honey, would you want me to take your name?
Phoebe: All right, let's see, call me mrs Hannigan.
Phoebe: What? Can't you see I'm in the middle of something? Ooh, I like it.
Phoebe: Okay!
Phoebe: Good for you. That was really mature.
Phoebe: Joey, you can't make someone do something they don't want to do. Believe me, there's something I've been trying to get Mike to do in bed and there's... he's just...
Phoebe: All right, prude... Look, Monica and Chandler really love this house. You are not gonna talk them into staying here.
(Phoebe whispers something in Joey's ear, but after hearing it he jumps up, shocked)
Phoebe: (to the woman behind her) This place is so depressing. If I had to work here I'd kill myself. (she turns around and the clerk behind the counter heard her.) But you obviously haven't.
Phoebe: I need to change my name, please. See, I need to change it because I'm-I'm hiding from the law. (the clerk shows no change in expression whatsoever) You're fun.
Phoebe: Okay, well, I just don't, I don't know how it works exactly. See, my name is Buffay and my husband's name is Hannigan, so is it supposed to be Buffay-Hannigan or Hannigan-Buffay?
Phoebe: Well, not anything, I mean...
Phoebe: Oh, this could take a while.
Phoebe: Okay.
[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler and Monica are there when Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Oh, not anymore. I changed it today.
Phoebe: Wrong again! Apparently you can change it to anything you want. So I thought, all right, here's an opportunity to be creative. So meet Princess Consuela Banana Hammock.
Monica: Phoebe!
Phoebe: Uh! Princess Consuela.
Phoebe: Uh-huh!
Phoebe: Uhm, no. I'm gonna have my friends call me Valerie.
Phoebe: What are you, what are you talking about? How did this happen?
Phoebe: Ross...
Phoebe: Can you?
Phoebe: And to knowing that your career doesn't mean everything. (Rachel mouths "aah")
Phoebe: Oh God!
[Scene: Phoebe is at Central Perk. Mike enters.]
Mike: Hey (He kisses Phoebe)
Phoebe: Welcome back!
Phoebe: Oh, me too!
Phoebe: Well, I'm no longer Phoebe Buffay.
Phoebe: Yes I did! Meet: Princess Consuela Banana Hammock! (She smiles from ear to ear)
Phoebe: Nope.
Phoebe: Yep.
Phoebe: Why? It's fun, it's different, no-one else has a name like it.
Phoebe: Great, okay, what are you gonna change it to?
Phoebe:(not amused) Mike Crap Bag?
Phoebe: You're not serious, right?
Phoebe: Uhu, uhu, well, then, great. If you love it, I love it.
Phoebe: And I love Crap.
Joey: (frustrated) Ahh! There's gotta be a way. I mean, you know, if Monica and Chandler move out here and now Phoebe is married to Mike. That just leaves me and Ross and Rach, you know what I mean?
[Scene: Central Perk. Phoebe and Mike are leaving.]
Phoebe: Thank you, mister Bag.
(a woman enters and recognizes Phoebe)
Phoebe: Oh hi Rita! Good! (to Mike) Oh, Rita's a massage client.
Phoebe: (shrugs) Er, Rita, this is my husband.
Phoebe: Yeah.
Phoebe: (without moving her lips, wearing a fake smile) Okay, I will. (to Rita) This is my husband Crap Bag.
Phoebe: Yeah... Ogh... Okay, fine. You made your point. Can you please just be Mike Hannigan again?
Mike: Only if you'll be Phoebe Buffay.
Phoebe: How about uhm... How about Buffay-Hannigan?
Phoebe: Yeah. I'm Phoebe Buffay-Hannigan Banana Hammock.
Phoebe: It's a funny word.
Phoebe: ...Oh crap!
Phoebe: Yeah, you can't do that! Oh, come on Mike, strap on a pair.Why don't you just tell her that we got back together. You know, women appreciate honesty. We also appreciate gentle spanking once in a while. Just F.Y.I.
Phoebe: Ooh, that was fast.
Phoebe: Hi, Mike's place.
Phoebe: Uh-hmm. Uh-hmm, whos next?
Phoebe: (stunned) I... I'm Phoebe.
(there's knocking on the door which Phoebe opens)
Phoebe: Yknow the only reason hes marrying you is because he thinks all the things you were saying about yourself were true.
Rachel: Noooooo!! (Phoebe lifts up the sheet to discover the exact same apothecary table they have.)
Monica: I'm sorry it's just, Phoebe just always thought you were, you were charming in a, in a sexless kind of way.
[Scene: In the store. Rachel and Phoebe returning from the changing rooms]
[Scene: Mike's place. Phoebe is on the phone.]
Phoebe: Alright... Susie, can I call you Susie?
Phoebe: Well, I don't...
Phoebe: Nothing, there's nothing wrong with you.
Phoebe: You're welcome!
Phoebe: Okay, not a fan of the tough love.
Phoebe: Ross, youre being ridiculous! Okay? You are cute and smart and sweet and that is much more important than three stupid divorces!
Phoebe: Will it? Will it?! I mean, how would you feel if you found out you were 31?
Phoebe: Oh, wait a minute its not gonna be Baby Girl? I thought that was so original!
(Phoebe enters.)
Phoebe: Hey, what's all this stuff?
Phoebe: Hey guys!
Phoebe: Oh, how does it work?
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Good to see you.
(Phoebe tries to give her phone to Ross, but he won't take it. He mouths "no.")
Phoebe: That's a, that's a long time.
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: Well, they may be a handful, but they're so cute.
Phoebe: Oh! Alright. Well I think the reason people laugh is becuase it's a play on the word roomy.
Phoebe: What?! You can't separate them! That's terrible. Which one?
Phoebe: Tell us what?
Phoebe: Nothing! (Picks up and sets the chick down on the floor.) (To the chick.) This is not over!
[Scene: At the Spa, Phoebe is at the half-opened door]
Phoebe: Uh-huh.
JOEY: Oh, but when Phoebe has a problem, everyone's all ears!
Phoebe: Insane.
Phoebe: Frank Jr.Jr.?
Phoebe: (singing) New York City has no power, and the milk is getting sour. But to me it is not scary, 'cause I stay away from dairy.... la la la, la la, la la... (she writes the lyrics down)
Phoebe: All right, all right... I'll play if we don't keep score!
Phoebe: Alright, so that leaves Chandler.
Phoebe: I couldve been killed I hope you know!
Phoebe: Are you kidding? That's what sisters are for.
Phoebe: Wow, Frank. I think we just ran out of kids.
Phoebe: I lost a whole year! I cant believe it! This is so unfair!
Phoebe: I feel like my face is swelling. (To Monica) Is my face swelling?
Phoebe: Hey.
Ross: Okay, Phoebe, this Dr. Oberman. He has no strong feelings about Fonzie or any of the Happy Days gang.
[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Chandler enter to find Phoebe there with the triplets.]
Phoebe: Still, he had to find out sometime.
(Monica, Phoebe, Chandler and Mike walk away, sipping their drinks)
Monica: Hey Phoebe!
Phoebe: Hey!
(Phoebe enters)
(They slowly and hesitantly move their lips together and kiss gently. Phoebe has her eyes wide open in shock and Chandler is squinting. He finally breaks the kiss after only a short while and pushes Phoebe away.)
Phoebe: Hey. Here. (Hands Chandler a copy of her flyer and sees the picture of Ralph.) Ohh, whos the silver fox?
Phoebe: Oh, you won't believe who moved back to town.
Phoebe: Well, I thought you loved her when you-when you married her.
Phoebe: Ugh, Let's just cut her out!
(Phoebe fakes pain to get Ross looking for another doctor.)
Phoebe: Rachel? Patrick is really rich. (To Patrick) Give her some money.
Phoebe: Oh, okay, I'm having another one! This one doesn't hurt eitherOoh, yes it does! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ooh! (Checks under the blanket.) Oh, I was kinda hoping that was it.
Phoebe: C'mon Mike, you can beat her! Knock that dog off her head!
RYAN: Phoebe, I have spent the last eight months in a steel tube with men, thinking about this moment. I am not gonna let a bunch of itchy spots stand between us. [He walks to her and kisses her.]
Phoebe: Why, why, why didn’t you just say no!
Phoebe: I did!
Phoebe: Thank you. (she tears up the gift certificate)
Phoebe: (playing guitar and singing) And there's a country called Argentinaaaa, it's a place I've never seeeeen. But I'm told for fifty pesos you can buy a human spleen. Humaaan spleeeeen. Olè!
Phoebe: Oh, look, twins. Hi, guys. Oh, cute, cute.
Monica: Hey Phoebe!
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: No.
Phoebe: So you dont know thats Barneys the store! That can be yknow his friends house, or a bar. Who has Barneys the store on their speed dial?
Phoebe: Hi!
David: Right... Goodbye Phoebe. (Makes a move to kiss her.)
Amanda: Hi! (Phoebe and Amanda hug)
Phoebe: Ooh, this is so exciting! Ooh, God, what are you going to bet?
Monica: (To Phoebe) You were going to cut me out?
Phoebe: Well...kinda.
Phoebe: (Also gets up and starts taking her purse) Oh my God. Was Mike with him?
Monica: Wait a minute! He stopped talking the minute Phoebe came in!
Rachel: Phoebe, you were right. I should've never gone to London, and from now on you make all of my decisions for me.
[Scene: Rachels bedroom, Rachel is entering carrying two glasses of wine. She gives one to Phoebe, keeps one, and completely ignores Monica.]
(Phoebe and Amanda walk in)
Phoebe: Please, Monica? In the hall?
Phoebe: (getting up) Oh, for god�s sake, Judy, pick up the sock! Pick up the sock! Pick up the sock! (everybody scared) I�m sorry, was that rude? Di-did my, my li-little outburst blunt (?) the hideousness (?) that is this evening? Look, I know, you all have a lot going on, but all I wanted to do was have dinner with my friends on my birthday. And you are all so late and you didn�t even have the courtesy to call. (her cellular rings) Well, it�s too late now.
Phoebe: Yeah, I guess you're right.
PHOEBE: Um, gram, um, can I see the pictures of my dad again?
Phoebe: (looking into the trash can) Sure. (Reaching into the trash can.) Do you need some floss? (Grabs a piece of it.)
Phoebe: (likes the jacket) No, but I like it. I think I left one of my rat babies.
Rachel and Phoebe: Hi!
[Scene: Central Park, Ross is teaching Phoebe how to ride her bike.]
Phoebe: (to Rachel) Ok, I just wanna be really sure this time. Andie McDowell's the girl from Four Weddings and a Funeral, right?
Phoebe: Joey, it's a birthday party.
Phoebe: Oh!
Phoebe: Sure, yeah!
Phoebe: (to Joey) Are you gonna be embarrassed going up there having nothing prepared?
Phoebe: Sure! Look, ok, bottom line: I love Mike... David! David. I love David. Don't look at me that way, Roseanne Rosannadanna!
Phoebe: Oh, Im sorry. I didnt hear you over all the winning.
Rachel: Oh, Phoebe, I’m sorry! Phoebe has prepared something as well.