words in movies
Phoebe: If you had to, what would you give up, food or sex?
Chandler: (to Phoebe) It's like a giant hug.
Phoebe: Ross, how about you. What would you give up, sex or food?
Phoebe: Ok, how about... uhm... sex or dinosaurs?
[Scene: Central Perk. Rachel and Phoebe are looking at some photos and they're sitting next to the window.]
Phoebe: Oh, how cute!
Phoebe: Oh, she looks just like a little doll!
Phoebe: Oh, thank God, 'cause that thing's really creepy! (looking outside the window) Look, there's Chandler. (he's on the street, talking to a woman)
Phoebe: OH! He's having an affair.
Phoebe: You know, I'm always right about these things.
Phoebe: Well, I'm sorry but it's hard to believe that anyone would tell a story that dull just to tell it! (looking outside) See, there's something going on with them. Look, he's getting into the car with her!
Phoebe: Oh yeah? Well, let's see. (she takes her mobile phone) Ok, duck down. (they both get down to hide themselves. Phoebe calls Chandler)
Phoebe: Oh, hi Chandler. It's Phoebe. Uhm... I know that Monica is working today so...(back to Central Perk) ...I was wondering if you want to come to the movies with me and Rachel.
Phoebe: (shocked) Oh, well, it's a shame that you-that you miss the movie 'cause we were gonna see, you know, either "Liar, Liar" or "Betrayal", or... "An Affair To Remember".
Phoebe: Ok, then maybe it'll be, uhm...
Phoebe: (glancing at her) What?
Phoebe: (to Chandler at the phone) Okay, we-we'll talk to you later. Okay, bye.
Phoebe: Ok. Quick. We gotta find a cab and follow them.
Phoebe: (patting her bag) I got them!
Chandler: I don’t know what you mean, giant talking cigarette! Oh, by the way, Phoebe called just as I was getting into Nancy’s car, so if she asks you, I was at work all day.
Phoebe: So, should we tell her?
Ross: I don’t know. Phoebe, if one of us saw Mike with another woman would you want us to tell you?
Phoebe: Why? Who’d you seen him with?
Ross: No one, I’m just saying if... (Phoebe starts pinching him in his neck)
Phoebe: TELL ME WHAT YOU KNOW!
Phoebe: All right. (she releases him). He is a good guy. You’re right, he wouldn’t cheat.
Ross: Believe me, if I did see with someone, there’s no way I... (Phoebe starts pinching him again)
Phoebe : WHO DID YOU SEE HIM WITH?
Phoebe: Well, look, whatever happens, we’re here for you and we love you.
Rachel: Phoebe and I saw Chandler with a blonde woman today outside on the street and then we followed them to a house in Westchester.
Phoebe: They went in together. So sorry.
Phoebe: What?
Monica: (goes to Chandler) Phoebe and Rachel saw you with Nancy today and... em... they think you're having an affair.
Phoebe: Why do you have a realtor?
Phoebe: So you're gonna move?
Phoebe: Have you thought about what you would be giving up? You can't move out of the city, what if you want Chinese food at 5am? Or a fake Rolex that breaks as soon as it rains or an Asian hooker sent right to your door?
Phoebe: Wha..? Again with the nature, what are you? Beavers?
Monica: We think if you saw it, you'd understand. I mean you guys were there. (Points to Rachel and Phoebe) It is beautiful, isn't it?
Phoebe: Yeah, but so is this.
Phoebe: You guys, you know what I just realized? 'Joker' is 'poker' with a 'J.' Coincidence?
Phoebe: [looking outside the window] Eww, look. Ugly Naked Guy lit a bunch of candles.
Phoebe: Hey, it’s your Thanksgiving too, y'know, instead of watching football, you could help.
Phoebe: (walks him to the kitchen) Easy. Step. How did it get on?
Phoebe: Oh my God! Monica's gonna totally freak out!
Phoebe: Well, of course it smells really bad. You have your head inside a turkey's ass!
(They hear Monica trying to unlock the door. So Phoebe quickly pushes his head down onto the table to make it look like the turkey is just sitting on a platter and not stuck on Joey's head.)
Phoebe: Ok, you guys, I don’t mean to make things worse, but umm, I don’t want to live with Rachel anymore.
Phoebe: You’re just so mean to each other! And I don’t want to end up like that with Rachel. I still like you!
Rachel: Well, Phoebe that’s fine because I’m not moving.
Monica: Whoa-whoa-whoa, Phoebe you gotta take her! Y’know, I-I-I said some really bad stuff about her, but y’know Rachel has some good qualities that make her a good roommate. She gets tons of catalogs and umm, she’ll fold down the pages of the things she thinks that I’d like.
Phoebe: What else?
Phoebe: That’s nice. I like having things to read in the bathroom.
Phoebe: Yeah, you don't wanna live in Westchester. That's like the worst of the Chesters.
Phoebe: (to Monica) You're gonna be okay?
Ross: Love you guys. (he kisses Monica, he, Rachel and Phoebe leave.)
Phoebe: Oh! These are the ones I was looking at in the store. (she got earrings)
(they both run off, leaving Ross, Phoebe and Rachel stunned.)
Phoebe: Well, you promised me a fun road trip! Weve been on the road six hours and youve been asleep for five and a half! We are switching at the next rest stop and you are going to drive all the way back! That will be your punishment, you greedy sleeper!
Phoebe: We won.
(They all glare evilly at Phoebe)
Phoebe: She is lying! And I bet I can prove it. Excuse me. (She grabs Ursulas purse and starts going through it and finds some papers.) Okay. Okay. YeahNot a prayer chain, but what looks like a detailed drawing of a bank floor plan. (Holds up her nametag.) Okay, heres the nametag from the restaurant where she works as a waitress! Not a teacher, a waitress. All right, heres her driver license, this oughta be good, she always lies about this. How old did she say she was?
Phoebe: No!! No way! No! And stop using my name! And shame on you! (Yells into the apartment) And shame on all of you! Youre disgusting! Especially you (points to someone) with that! (Storms away.)
Phoebe: Sure!
Phoebe: Hey!
Ross: Phoebe, what happened?
Phoebe: Oh no!You guys aren't supposed to get divorced for 7 years!
Phoebe: ...teen! (throws in a ten-dollar bill)
PHOEBE: No because I chickened out the last time when I tried to meet him. So I mean coincidences? I don't think so.
Phoebe: Yeah.
Phoebe: But what?
Phoebe: Hee hee!
Monica: Listen Phoebe...
Phoebe: No, you can�t go. No-no-no, I can�t hold this table on my own. If they ask me to move, I cave.
Phoebe: (pause) Ok, say no more.
[Time lapse: Phoebe in front of restaurant again]
Phoebe: Okay, fine, I�ll move. Alright, you don�t have to manhandle me. (gets up) Where? (he points at a smaller table) Okay. Thank you. Wach.
Phoebe: Yes! A friend of mine did it and its totally legal!
Phoebe: Yeah, but did you see the dents in his knuckles? That means he's artistic.
Phoebe: Don't tear it.
Phoebe: Right, yeah, ok, I'll ask the butler to fetch my diamonds out of the vault.
Phoebe: Hey!
(Phoebe comes in)
Phoebe: My songs aren't good enough for your restaurant?
Phoebe: Well...it's not about quality.
[Cut to Phoebe in Rosss new apartment looking at Monica and Chandler and what theyre about to do in The One Where Everybody Finds Out.]
[Scene: In front of Monica's restaurant. Phoebe is playing]
Phoebe: Oh my God! Youre right! Go! (Monica starts to leave.) Go tell Chandler! Hurry before its too late! Wait no! (Monica stops.) Does this also mean putting out doesnt get you love? (Monica is shocked.)
Phoebe: Oh, right, so he gets a little crazy when he's stoned.
Phoebe: I'm sorry too... (they hug)
Roy: All right, somebody show me where to plug in my box, and we'll get this party started! (he thrusts his pelvis towards Phoebe) Whaaaa... (walks back to plug in his cd player) Here? All right.
Phoebe: You know, I might know somebody. Hey, how about you set me up with someone, and we double date!
Phoebe: Oh no! He's not getting away that easy! (Phoebe and Joey run towards the bathroom and enter)
Phoebe: It's all right. You can mourn.
Phoebe: What is it?
Phoebe: I-I mean I, well I think I can figure it out. I guess y'know I was born, and everyone started lying their asses off!
Phoebe: (catches it) Nah, I don't feel like playing. (She sets the ball down on the table and everyone gasps.)
Phoebe: Okay, oh, and Emma needs a cowgirl outfit for the competition.
Monica: Phoebe, it's not about quantity.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica is entering, Phoebe is already there.]
[Scene: Phoebe and Rachel's, Phoebe and Rachel are cleaning up the mess.]
Phoebe: Hi!
Phoebe: Ah, ah.
Phoebe: Youre right. Youre right, hes just embracing life. We could all stand to be a little more like Parker. You know what? I am like him! Im a sunny, positive person.
Phoebe: We know about your party Joey.
Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: Oh! Well, what kind of emergency that gets us both out of here?
Phoebe: Hey Ross!
Phoebe: Oh, What's the matter?
Phoebe: Ugh, okay Sherlock! (Hands over the key.)
Phoebe: Worse?
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Ross are laying out the ground rules for the maid of honor auditions to Rachel and Phoebe.]
Phoebe: (gasps) Ohh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. (The chick clucks.) You'll get your turn!
Phoebe: Yes, and her boyfriend. But we're celebrating Thanksgiving in December 'cause he is lunar.
Phoebe: Are you kidding. He is so considerate of my feelings and... you know I think... you'd also like to know that he is a very gentle lover.
(She storms into his apartment to find him with a towel around his shoulders, a bowl on his head, and Phoebe with scissors in her hand.)
Phoebe: And no, oh please, oh please let me finish. (Rachel stops talking.) Oh I guess that was it.
Phoebe: Y'know you guys were a lot more supportive when I wanted to make denim furniture.
Phoebe: Okay, now you're just taking lines right out of the song!
Phoebe: Ok well give her a chance to see all of that!
Phoebe: Then what's wrong with them? Would they not go with your tiny portions of pretentious food?
Phoebe: Hey, thank you so much for these tickets, Chandler.
Phoebe: I ordered Chinese food.
Phoebe: (entering) Hey!
[Scene: The theatre where Joey is auditioning. Phoebe enters when Joey's on stage and she sits down. He hasn't seen her.]
Phoebe: Promise?
Phoebe: You know, you are talking about one of my dear, dear friends.
Phoebe: Well, do you care about friendship?
Monica: (sliding into Joeys place on the couch to try and talk to Phoebe) Huh? Whatd ya say Joe? Ill be right there. (gets up and joins Joey)
(Phoebe enters the hall)
Phoebe: Ohh, Im getting too pregnant for this, lugging around a stupid massage table. Yknow, I have to find a job where I carrying a smaller table. (She goes over and stands in front of the TV.)
Receptionist: Phoebe, your next client's in the waiting room.
[Scene: Outside Central Perk, Chandler and Monica are waiting for Phoebe to arrive with the cab.]
Phoebe: (watching around and whispering) Ok, are they listening?
Phoebe: I didnt know where to put it so I just left it here for now.
[Scene: A Restaurant, Phoebe, Rachel, and Monica are having brunch.]
Phoebe: Is something wrong?
Phoebe: Ja!
Phoebe: Okay, then I'm Swedish...
Phoebe: (Thinks for a few moments) Uhm... Stockholm.
Phoebe: Yeah and I-I found you one too who is not a weirdo.
Rachel: Yeah. Sure. (Throws some in her bag and she walks away as Phoebe, dressed as Supergirl walks up and eyes Monica who eyes her back.)
Phoebe: You know it's me?
Phoebe: How can you come here?
Phoebe: Uhu, uhu... and why do you think that is?
Phoebe: Oh, Ja! Ja!
Phoebe: I don't have to tell you everything!
Phoebe: Ok.
Rachel: (now lifts her head) Phoebe!!
Rachel: Oh! Phoebe, why did you lie to me about working here?
[Scene: The Spa Reception. Phoebe walks in]
Receptionist: Good morning Phoebe.
Phoebe: It's a normal Swedish name... Ikea...
Phoebe: Exactly!
(Ross resumes playing, this time accompanied by Phoebe screeching out Es in tune with Ross. While Phoebe is singing along, Rachel is having a very difficult time keeping a straight face. Thankfully, Ross gives up after a little while.)
Phoebe: Ok, that'll be great!
Phoebe: Well, you could wait til I go to the dentist, maybe Ill kill him.
Rachel: Hi! Ok, you're ready to go pick up Phoebe and go shopping?