words in movies
Phoebe: That is so cruel! Why? Why would a parent name their child Bethel?
[Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe is getting ready to sing. Joey is not there.]
Phoebe: So you guys, I'm doing all new material tonight. I have twelve new songs about my mother's suicide, and one about a snowman.
Phoebe: Yeah, you wish!
Rachel: Phoebe, you're on.
Phoebe: Oh, oh, good.
Rachel: (Into microphone) Okay, hi. Ladies and gentlemen, back by popular demand, Miss Phoebe Buffay. Wooh!
Phoebe: (Takes mike) Thanks, hi. Um, I wanna start with a song that means a lot to me this time of year. (Shakes bell as an introduction) (Sung:)
Phoebe: (Sung)
(Over the sound of Phoebe singing we hear two scientists, Max and David, having a noisy discussion)
Phoebe: (Sung)
Phoebe: Well, c'mon, if it's important enough to discuss while I'm playing, then I assume it's important enough for everyone else to hear!
Phoebe: Could you speak up please?
Phoebe: Okay, we're gonna take a short break. (Goes over to their table)
Phoebe: David's like, y'know, Scientist Guy. He's very methodical.
Phoebe: Me too! Oh! Did you ever see An Officer and a Gentleman?
Phoebe: Well, he's kinda like the guy I went to see that with. Except, except he-he's smarter, and gentler, and sweeter... I just- I just wanna be with him all the time. Day and night, and night and day... and special occasions...
Phoebe: No, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, could I just?
[Scene: Max and David's lab, David is explaining something to Phoebe with the aid of a whiteboard.]
Phoebe: Okay, alright, I have a question, then.
Phoebe: Um, were you planning on kissing me ever?
Phoebe: Sure.
Phoebe: Oh, David, I, I think you are a sweeping sorta fella. I mean, you're a sweeper! ...trapped inside a physicist's body.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, oh, I'm sure of it. You should just do it, just sweep and throw me.
Phoebe: Oh yeah, right now.
Phoebe: Okay, now you're just kinda tidying.
David: Okay, what the hell, what the hell. (Sweeps the remaining papers off the desk and grabs Phoebe) You want me to actually throw you or you-you wanna just hop?
Phoebe: I can hop. (She hops onto the table)
Monica: I'm sorry, okay. It's just that Chandler has somebody, and Phoebe has somebody- I thought I'd ask Fun Bobby.
Max: Phoebe. Hi.
Phoebe: Oh, hi Max! Hey, do you know everybody?
Phoebe: No, no, he hasn't been around.
Phoebe: Minsk?
Phoebe: I know where Minsk is.
Phoebe: So when, when do you leave?
[Scene: Max and David's lab, they are working. Phoebe knocks on the door]
Phoebe: Hello?
Phoebe: Hi.
Phoebe: Um, well, Max told me about Minsk, so (Puts on a fake cheery voice) congratulations! This is so exciting!
Phoebe: Oh, you're not going? (Fake disappointed voice) Oh, why?
Phoebe: So-so you're really not going?
Phoebe: Oh don't do that.
Phoebe: Oh no no.
Phoebe: Oh, but I can't do that-
Phoebe: It's your thing, and-
Phoebe: Okay, um, stay.
Phoebe: Stay.
Phoebe: Getting so good at that! (She hops on)
Phoebe: And then... your face is bloated?
Ross: (Watching Marcel play with Phoebe. To Chandler) Look at him. I'm not saying he has to spend the whole evening with me, but at least check in.
(David is feeding Phoebe popcorn. Max walks up)
Phoebe: Hi, Max!
Phoebe: Are you alright?
(Phoebe leads David into a bedroom)
Phoebe: You're going to Minsk.
Phoebe: Oh, you are so going to Minsk. You belong in Minsk. You can't stay here just 'cause of me.
Phoebe: Oh yes, yes, yes you can. Just say, um, 'Phoebe, my work is my life and that's what I have to do right now'. And I say 'your work?! Your work?! How can you say that?!'. And then you say, um, 'it's tearing me apart, but I have no choice. Can't you understand that?'. And I say (Hits him) 'no! No! I can't understand that!'.
Phoebe: Ooh, sorry. Um, and, and then you put your arms around me. And then you put your arms around me. (He does so) And, um, and then you tell me that you love me and you'll never forget me.
Phoebe: And then you say that it's almost midnight and you have to go because you don't wanna start the new year with me if you can't finish it. (They kiss) I'm gonna miss you. You scientist guy.
Phoebe: Everybody looks so happy. I hate that.
Phoebe: I dunno. I don't feel like kissing anyone tonight.
Phoebe: Oh please, somebody tell me I dont have to go to work today!
Phoebe: I do, he's been working on that all day! (looking at Joey)
Ross: No. I am not putting on makeup. (Knock at the door. Phoebe enters.)
Phoebe: Well tell that to them. Oh! You cant, their dead.
[Scene: Monica and Chandlers, Phoebe enters with a paper turkey.]
Phoebe: I worked in a Dairy Queen, why?
Phoebe: OK. (pause) Oh Monica! Guess what!
PHOEBE: Hey. Oh thanks for the great movie tip.
Phoebe: Oh, my friend Sarah had a great time last night.
Phoebe: (the cat runs away from her) Oooh! You are a very bad man!
Phoebe: Dont you see? Everyones looking at me! The plans working! I didnt even have to take off my top yet!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey are there.]
PHOEBE: Didn't you like, just get your eyes checked?
Phoebe: (in a deep voice, imitating Ross) Um, Rachel Im really sorry. (imitating Rachel) Thats okay, do you wanna get back together? (imitating Ross) Yeah, okay. (in her normal voice) Did anyone else hear that?!
Phoebe: What?
Phoebe: Okay! I justI didnt know that you are a lesbian. (Joey smiles and nods lewdly.)
Phoebe: Oh, I almost dont want to show this. (Hands it to him.) Just remember Im a minute younger.
Phoebe: You guys you really should get rid of those animals. They shouldnt be living in an apartment.
PHOEBE: OK, I smell smoke. Maybe that's 'cause someone's pants are on fire.
Phoebe: 'Cause, you know, (in that voice) if you don't look good, we don't look good. I love that voice.
Frank Jr.: You just don't know how hard it is, Phoebe. There's just so many of them. You know, two I can handle. Two's great. You just hold one in each hand, but what do I do when the third one runs at me with his bike helmet on. I've got no more hands to protect my area! There's three of them, Phoebe, three!
Monica: Phoebe, Sandras mad at you too. It-it doesnt bother you?
PHOEBE: No. What do you, what do you want me to be, like some stupid, big, like, purple dinosaur?
Monica: Oh my pleasure. Okay, Im afraid Ive got some bad news. (Phoebe enters.) Phoebe!
Phoebe: Is that a new Swede jacket? It looks really expensive.
Phoebe: Great, ok faster! "je"
(Monica and Phoebe look at each other and leave the apartment again)
Ross: (To Phoebe) Hey Pheebs! How's that uh, vegetarian pizza working out for ya? You and those vegetables have a real thing going on, huh?
Phoebe: I know.
Phoebe: (joining him) Love....
Phoebe: Ive found....
Phoebe: Hey, its your Thanksgiving too, y'know, instead of watching football, you could help.
Monica and Phoebe: Hey!
Phoebe: (on phone) Hello? (Listens) Yes, Im the one who found your phone.
Phoebe: Yay!!
Phoebe: (walking back in with her hand over her eyes.) Umm, wheres my purse?
Phoebe: Well, I am. (Moves over and takes his hand.)
Monica: Phoebe.
(They start smacking each other's cups, but Phoebe notices a security guard approaching.)
Phoebe: Yeah.
Phoebe: Whats block?
Phoebe: Go! Go! Go!
Phoebe: Yeah, and nobody slept with that Xerox girl.
Phoebe: That you like, (snappily confronting Joey over the heads of the knitting circle) we get it. You like her. Great!
Phoebe: Touchdown!! Touchdown!!
Monica: Run, Phoebe, run!
Phoebe: Oh my God!
PHOEBE: Why couldn't you have just figured this out six years ago?
Phoebe: Uh, wow! Isn't it ironic that he liked you and now you like him?
Phoebe: Oh, I know! "Oh...I slept with Billy Joel". All right, who hasn't?
Phoebe: Woo-yay!!
Phoebe: I love this game!!
Phoebe: Monica, Monica, you know what gets out hummus.
Phoebe: You didn't read this one either?!
Phoebe: You have chalk on your face.
[Sequence 2: Phoebe throws the ball, and its intercepted by Joey, who starts to run up field. Rachel jumps on his back in order to try and tackle him, but she doesnt slow him down. Monica and Phoebe then both grab her legs in order to stop Joey, who still manages to fight through the tackle and score the touchdown.]
Phoebe: (interrupting) No, I mean I was really acting my ass off.
PHOEBE: You guys are so pathetic, I, oh, OH, XANADU! OH.
[Scene: Madison Square Garden. Mike and Phoebe are walking to their seats.]
PHOEBE: Didn't it like totally speak to you?
Phoebe: Come on Mon, let her throw the ball.
Phoebe: No youre not, youre wondering which cushion it is.
[Scene: A hall on the floor where Chandler works. Chandler and Phoebe enters, and overhears some employees's conversation. One of them is doing Chandler.]
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler, and Joey are eating Thanksgiving dinner.]
PHOEBE: Hey. Watcha guys doin?
Phoebe: Yeah, it's weird. I can't help it though he's so sweet, he's like this little puppy dog, y'know? But like a really tough one that shots bad guys. Ohh, I just love beginning parts of relationships, y'know?! You just like can't keep your hands off each other.
Phoebe: Um, perhaps. Yes! Yes, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I was just afraid that you were still hung up on my sister.
Phoebe: Really?
Phoebe: Hi, yeah, hi! I'm umm, Phoebe Buffay, and I have babies coming out of me.
Phoebe: No! Because hes in love with the British chippy! Look, Rachel, if you go, youre just gonna mess with his head and ruin his wedding! Yknow, its too late! You missed youre chance! Im sorry, I know this must be really hard, its over.
Phoebe: Hey, are you going to find out the sex of the baby?
Phoebe: Umm, this stuffing is amazing. Do you think we should bring them some?
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross and Phoebe are sitting on the couch.]
Phoebe: I just asked you.
PHOEBE: The voice woman. Ya know, I mean, she has a great voice but she doesn't have a video.
Phoebe: Yes.
Phoebe: Oh this is so ho-o-ot!
Phoebe: Destiny.
Phoebe: So, what happens to the old guys?
Phoebe: I never had a bike of my own.
Phoebe: Yeah, I wouldve except I had a big spaghetti stain on the other side.
Phoebe: Chandler what are you doing?!
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's Apartment, everyone's there; Phoebe recites the last verse of a poem to Joey. This poem is known as "The Night Before Christmas" by Clement Clarke Moore, but it seems that it's rather "Account of a visit from St. Nicholas" by Henry Livingston.]
Phoebe: Its not like we-we know each other or anything. Or that have anything in common.
Phoebe: Yeah, after this, I think he'll be doing that himself.
Phoebe: This is nice. We never do anything just the two of us.
Phoebe: Why would you start again after chewing all that quitting gum?
PHOEBE: Oh, it's like a skit.
Phoebe: Whoa!! He is soo unreasonable! God, although I think I understand what he means. Oh my God, this is like 60 Minutes, okay, when, when, at first youre really mad at that pharmaceutical company for making the drug and then y'know you just feel bad for the people because they needed to make their hair grow.
Phoebe: Gnight, bro.
Phoebe: Rach, Rach, I just remembered. I had a dream about Mr. Geller last night.
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Phoebe, and Ross are there.]
Phoebe: Oh! Oh my God!
Phoebe: This is the worst Christmas ever.
Phoebe: You saved them! You guys! Oh God, youre the best!
Phoebe: Wow, ooh, you're gonna be making money hand over fist!
Phoebe: Yeah, I know, Frank. I counted them when they were coming out of my area.
Precious: Phoebe? Mike's ex-girlfriend Phoebe, the love of his life? That Phoebe?
Phoebe: Yeah! You know all those yummy noises? I wasn't faking.
(Phoebe exits)