words in movies
(Joey turns and looks at quite possibly one of the ugliest pets that you can possibly buy on the planet. Rachel has bought herself a hairless cat. Yep, a hairless cat! Joey and Ross start to get sick.)
Joey: That, is not a cat! {I have to agree with Joey on this one.}
Rachel: All right listen ball boys! My grandmother had one of these when I was a little girl and it was the sweetest thing! I mean it was so cute, it would sit in my lap and purr all day long, and I would drag a shoestring on the ground and he would chase it!
Monica: Guys, could you please just stop throwing the ball for one minute and just help me find it!
Phoebe: You are useless! Freaking out about commitment is the one thing you can do! The one thing! And you can't even do that right! God!
(He takes her into one of those typical interrogation rooms you see on TV and in the movies. Which is really appropriate here, since this is a TV show. What are the odds of that?)
Gary: 'Cause uh, this is today's Post (produces one from the other chair) and uh, these are the listings I found. (Points) Brooklyn Heights, two bedroom. (Points) Brooklyn Heights, one bedroom. (Points) Brooklyn Heights, (points) Brooklyn Heights, (points) Brooklyn Heights!
Phoebe: Oh wait, one sec. One sec. (Goes to the mirror) Hey you! Behind the glass! Who are you looking at! I've always wanted to say that when I was in one of these rooms, (sees the look on his face) which was never!
Monica: All right, there's some pizza at my place, we can all eat with one hand right? Are you with me?
Monica: Rachel! What is your cat doing in one of my bowls!
Monica: It's okay. It's okay. Just pretend that it didn't happen! Okay? No one needs to know! I mean, Phoebe's not an official ballplayer! I mean, only official ballplayers can drop the ball!
Monica: Okay! Okay, let's race! First one there wins! Ha-ha! (Runs out the door and everyone watches her leave.)
Phoebe: Oh. (Picks it up.) Its just so unexpected! I I uh Boy Ill tell you its just such an honor to be nominated for a Nobel Prize and yknow to win one for a massage. Especially after having just won a Tony award for best actress in
CHANDLER: Hey, just because this woman thinks she can actually see Joey through the magical box in her living room doesn't mean she's not a person. I mean, does she not deserve happiness, does she not deserve love? What're you lookin' at me for? He's the one who wants to boff the maniac.
Monica: Hey, see that snippy guy over there? Hes the one who decides who gets up on the platform. We should go dance by him.
Phoebe: (To Chandler) Check it out! Cup hat! (Points to her hat.) Cup banner! Cup chandelier! And the thing that started it all, the cup! (Holds up one.)
Rachel: Ooh, is this one of those things where you throw it in a bag with some graveyard dirt and hang it from a north-facing tree?
Phoebe: Well I guess its okay to open one more if its part of a set. Yknow, its probably this one. (Grabs another small one.)
RACHEL: Ok, I'm sorry, I'm just not very good with babies. I mean I haven't been around them, I mean, you know, since I was one.
Chandler: No! No! No! No(Joey looks at him)one can beat me.
Monica: Six? I just had it for one night. Its three.
CHANDLER: The one time they're not home.
JOEY: No one.
(Phoebe gets up and walks across the hallway, but the door to Chandler and Joeys apartment is shut. She knocks, and anxiously waits for Joey to come, but instead her identical twin sister emerges wearing one of Joeys shirts.)
Chandler: Oh just great. He beeps me now with codes. One is, "Bring me food." Two is, "Im with a girl, bring us food." Three is, "Im lost and I cant find food."
Phoebe: This is so typical. I'm always the last one to know everything.
Ross: (pretend fishing in the living room) Ohh, Gellers got one hooked! Ohh! Looks like a big one! Yeah, ohh! Ohh! (Swinging the rod back and forth) Its the classic struggle between man and(swings the rod and knocks over a lamp.) Someone knocked over a lamp.
Phoebe: I cant. I cant. She dumped me, I mean I totally trusted her and then one day it was Okay, bye Pheebs gone. Y'know what the saddest part is, when we were playing together, that was like the most fun Ive ever had in like all my lives.
(They walk off into the sunset, at least a picture of one.)
CHAN: OK, look, that is one guy's opinion, alright. Phoebs, read yours.
Rachel: Oh yes I do. I do. I believe that there is one perfect person out there for everyone. And do you know how you find him? You stop looking for him. Thats why I stopped looking for Russell Crowe. Hell find me.
Chandler: See Joe, not that thats not grrreat! But, one of the cool things about having somebody we know perform the ceremony is that it can be about us! Yknow, it can be more personal. You can tell stories about us!
Ross: You know what the scariest part is? What if there's only one woman for everybody, y'know? I mean what if you get one woman- and that's it? Unfortunately in my case, there was only one woman- for her...
Joey: No, yeah, no, ok, but not yet. I don't wanna seem too eager. One Mississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi. That seems pretty cool. (he walks over to her) Hey, Angela.
Monica: Yknow, I only know of two surefire ways to shut a man up. And one of them is sex.
Director: Okay, everybody, we'd like to get this in one take, please. Let's roll it.. water's working (The shower starts).. and... action.
MRS. GELLER: Which one? Which button, Jack.
Ross: Yeah, okay. (he plops down into one of the leather chairs, with the footrest extended.)
Dr. Franzblau: Ok, all right, well aren't there times when you come home at the end of the day, and you're just like, 'if I see one more cup of coffee'...
Male Jeweler: This ring is from the 1920s, its a one and a half carat diamond with sapphires on either side.
Joey: Oh comelook, when I was a kid my dads company gave season tickets to the number one salesman every year, all right? My dad never won! Of course, he wasnt in the sales division, but still, I never ever, ever forgot that!
JADE: Hi, it's me. Listen, Bob. I'm probably way out of line here. I mean, It has been 3 years, and you're probably seeing someone else now, but if we could just have one night together, just for old time's sake, one hot, steamy, wild night...
RACHEL: Just one cheek.
CHANDLER: She's one of us now.
MONICA: No one.
MONICA: I thought she just had one.
Rachel: Hey! Hey-hey, now this was no ones fault Pheebs. Okay? It was an accident.
RACHEL: I'm off my break now so uh, um here you take this [hands back Ben] and um, I am gonna go pour these very nice people some coffee. Ok. Oh look at that, I don't have a pot. I don't have a pot. Well, hey, maybe I've got one at home, or in Scarsdale. Hey is that a door? [leaves]
Rachel: Pheebs, this whole apartment thing is just a nightmare! Every place I can afford comes with a roommate who is a freak. I mean, look at this; (Points to one and starts to read it.) "Wanted. Female roommate, non-smoker, non-ugly." Its just, there is nothing! The citys full!
Chandler: We should start with the big stuff. Yknow? That'll be the easiest. Uh, let's start with the couch. (He picks up one end and Ross doesn't help) I got it. (He moves it back to where he thinks it goes.)
Ross: Ok. Well, before I say anything, I just need to know, is this one of those things where you break up with a guy, and then I tell you what I think, and then the next day you get back together with the guy, and I look like a complete idiot?
RACH: I had one glass.
JOEY: How come Richard looks so much cooler with one of these than me?
DIRECTOR'S ASSISTANT: The one in the director's chair.
RACHEL: What? You didn't get one.
JOEY: [reading over her shoulder] Wait, here's one. Uh, would you be willing to cook naked?
Chandler: I did! A penis one! Look, just so I know, what was so wrong about what I said?
PRODUCER: OK Phoebe, you ready to try one?
JOEY: Well, that was only 'cause I used the red one to unclog the drain.
MRS GREEN: If you didn't pour the coffee, no one would have anything to drink.
Joey: Oh, yknow what? Since Im here, I think Im gonna have me a little beer on the port side. (Grabs and opens one.)
Ross: Okay, so I'm gonna be the only one standing there alone when the ball drops?
MONICA: There's only one.
MONICA: You need one too?
Ross: Getting it away from me would be job one.
Phoebe: No, and so there's no one to walk me down the aisle and... well, I would just really love it if you would do it.
MR A: Oh, wait, I remember, she also said she wanted to sleep with me one last time.
RICHARD: Ok, just one more point.
Chandler: There's no-one around. Why don't we just take this one?
Phoebe: Well, but thats what he was for me. And she you know, kind of stole him away, and then... broke his heart... and then he wouldnt even talk to me any more. Because he said he didnt wanna be around... anything that looked like either one of us.
Phoebe: Okay Ive got one for you, if you had too which one would you rather eat, a seeing eye dog or a talking gorilla?
Melissa: Oh, isnt a shame when one girl ruins it for the whole bunch? (Phoebe agrees by grunting.)
Phoebe: Are you kidding? Im like the one who talked him into it. I like to think of myself as the puppet master of the group.
(from 1.09 - "The One Where Underdog Gets Away")
Ross: No, no I don't, because it's being restrung, somebody was supposed to bring me one.
Joey: (to the dog) Cmere. Hey. Cmere. Thats Rachel. Shes the one who used to live here. Might as well be honest with youwe love her. But we cant have her. I really miss her. Well, hey, you understand, right? Youre a guy. (thinks about it and picks up the dog and looks) Well, you used to be.
Chandler: I know, just quick-quick question, quick question. Which one was Deep Impact and which one was Armageddon?
Ross: Im sorry, its just one of my last nights together before she leaves for campto be a counselor!
Joey: (joins him) I gotta get one, too.
[Scene: Bill and Colleen's apartment. Chandler comes running into the living room. Monica is the only one there.]
Phoebe: Oh, this is so intense. One side of my butt is totally asleep, and the other side has no idea.
(Needless to say, Phoebe is stunned into silence. And one audience member gasps.)
[Scene: Interview room. Ross and two other professors (one man, one woman) are sitting on one side of a long desk. Benjamin Hobart is sitting on the other side]
Janine: Sure, listen I was gonna order some pizza, you wanna share one?
FRANK: Yeah, he loved stilts. One time I was upstairs, I was stealing cigarettes out of my mom's purse, and uh, all of a sudden I look over and there's my dad's head bobbing past the window. He just had this big smile on his face and he was waving 'cause he was always happiest when he was on his stilts.
Rachel: I cannot believe that after ten years, you do not know ONE thing about me.
[Scene: The apartment in the listing, the guys are checking it out. There's one problem though, it's roughly the size of this computer screen. As they enter Joey lets out a whistle.]
MONICA: Wow, that is a surprise. Just one little question, uh, why not Ross's room?
EDDIE: That's a tomato. This one definitely goes in the display.
Ross: No! For all I know, shes trying to find me but couldnt because I kept moving around. No, from now on, Im staying in one place. (He sits down on the bed.) Right here.
PHOEBE: No, that's my stepdad. My real dad's the one that ran out on us before I was born.
Ross: (coming in) I'm dead and no one cares?
Rachel: Hmm, mild discomfort. So I take it youve had one of these Braxton thingies?
Joey: Whoa, whoa, whoa, Monica, what're you doin'? This is a poker game. You can't serve food with more than one syllable. It's gotta be like chips, or dip, or pretz...(look of realization)
Joey: Well. I guess you think youre pretty special huh? Sittin up here in your fancy small hall building. Makin stars jump through hoops for ya, huh? Well yknow what? (Throws the script away) This is one star whos hoop This is a star that the hoopthis hoopI was Dr. Drake Remoray!
ROSS: Did you see me write one down?
Joey: Ah, I'm gonna be one of his helpers. It's just such a slap in the face, y'know?
Rachel: I know. I always thought if you and I got married, it would be the one that stuck. And it wouldnt be a secret, and we wouldnt have our wedding dinner at Pizza Hut. (They both laugh.)
Monica: Lewis Posin! He was my best friend in fifth grade, and-and then one day I asked him to be my boyfriend and he said no. Do you know why?
MONICA: Alright, well tell me one of yours.
Ross: Alright, alright. We're all adults here, there's only one way to resolve this. Since you saw her boobies, I think, uh, you're gonna have to show her your peepee.
Phoebe: You mean the one that my grandmother made me swear on her deathbed that I would never let out of our family?
Chandler: Here! (Hands him one. Joey adds it up and discovers that he was right.)
Chandler: There is not one hair on that head.
Rachel: Come on you gotta have one!
Joey: Will you pick one, just pick one! Here, how about that one? (points to a table)
Mr. Franklin: (laughs) Thats a good one. (Walks away.)
Chandler: That sounds like my first bike. (They all turn and look at him.) My dad gave me his old one.
CHAN: One. . . two. . . two and a half. OK, just show me one of them.
Ross: Joey comeI cant believeI bring you here to see the Bapstein-King comet, one of natures most spectacular phenomenon, and all you care about are bugs stuck in tar and-and some woman!
[Cut to later, they are finishing up the pizza, theres one piece left.]
Ross: Thats, thats, thats a big candy bar. (Shes holding one of those huge Toblerone bars.) I had the most amazing time with you.